Do You Stop Participating? Reading and/or Writing?

[kryos]

[quote name='Mack704'] A friend recently cruised the Med. on Princecess. They lost his lugguge. He didn't get it back until he got home. He still had a great cruise.
[/QUOTE]
That would turn out to be a great cruise, in my opinion. The airline would have had to reimburse him for all the new duds he bought! :)

I remember once the airline lost my one piece of luggage ... on a trip home from California (so no big inconvenience). They told me that if my bag was not located and returned to me within 24 hours, I could file a claim ... up to something like $1,500. I can't tell you the fantasies I was entertaining that whole next day. All I had in that bag were jeans and tee-shirts ... it was a very informal type trip. I really needed some new clothes anyway, and figured the airline would buy them for me if they couldn't find this bag of crap.

Don't you know it, though ... all day I keep going out to my front porch ... looking for the bag. It's not there. I'm bursting with glee ... planning my shopping trip. Then, late that night, as I am heading out to go to work, I almost trip over this big duffle bag sitting on the porch. So much for my shopping trip. :(

Blue skies ...

--rita

[xpcdoojk]

[quote name='Scrumpy']Where I come from, it is considered hateful to say someone is stupid, especially in public. It's one thing to point out misinformation and another thing to attack someone. I wouldn't try to get someone's post removed, but I'd probably have some harsh thoughts about the name-caller privately. Although I may not always be as tactful as I'd like, I think we should attempt to avoid saying things in a way that can be interpreted as cruel or mean-spirited. I can't see how it helps anyone to be called stupid; it only makes them angry and/or hurts their feelings.[/quote]

Don't worry, that is an example. But some ideas are stupid. :D

Everybody is quick to take everything as a personal attack when most people use the word stupid or similar synonym on a daily basis and yet in a anonymous conversation in an internet forum we immediately choose to be offended. Kind of proves my point.:D

jc

[HeatherInFlorida]

[quote name='Catnip']Agreed. I know that I while I am here, I play by their rules. I was simply giving my opinion! :rolleyes: [/quote]

And I mine:) .

[quote name='Catnip']
........................ most adults can play nice. :)[/quote]

I absolutely agree 100%. But the key word is "most". [B][I]Most[/I][/B] people also can drive reasonably, but it is the [B][I]few[/I][/B] who can't or won't that cause the crashes.

So unfortunately it is the "few" that can sometimes stand out and absolutely ruin a perfectly good (and usually very interesting) debate on a subject.

All that said, though, I agree with much of what you say as well as jc's point. I concur. But it's a fine line.

[Scrumpy]

[quote name='xpcdoojk']Don't worry, that is an example. But some ideas are stupid. :D

Everybody is quick to take everything as a personal attack when most people use the word stupid or similar synonym on a daily basis and yet in a anonymous conversation in an internet forum we immediately choose to be offended. Kind of proves my point.:D

jc[/quote]

I think it's usually the interpretation of tone that is the problem - and the intent. It's been researched and documented that miscommunication is very common with the written word, increasingly common since the pervasive use of the Internet (email, MBs, TM, etc) usage in our society has become customary and that a lot of people do misconstrue statements or see underlying meanings that are not there. So, yes, your point is correct. It's not a personal issue with a handful of people. It's not always because folks are defensive or insecure (although that excuse does help those who intentionally dig at others; they can always say someone else is too sensitive). It's because we do not communicate clearly, don't know our audience, don't thoughtfully approach the words we choose, etc. When we choose to use words (or use them out of laziness) that have a negative connotation (or denotation), then there will inevitably be times that people are offended inadvertently. Sure, your example was a little OTT, but it's rare that I see an opinion or question that I do think is actually stupid. Someone may be ignorant, but at least they are trying to get info. What they consider important or valuable may strike some of us as silly or stupid, but we don't always have to give in to the desire to tell them that. That's all I meant. It's a fact that it happens and it's a fact that some people react poorly to those kind of statements; what anyone else thinks of those reactions is largely unimportant unless they pursue it by criticizing the offended party for being offended in the first place. That's obviously not helpful - or very nice. Whether anyone changes their behavior is their choice. Just sharing my thoughts on what I believe to be a problem - although not one that necessarily lends itself to censorship.

[twinkletoes4445]

[quote name='HeatherInFlorida']

So unfortunately it is the "few" that can sometimes stand out and absolutely ruin a perfectly good (and usually very interesting) debate on a subject.[/QUOTE]

Fortunately, it is just a few posters who resort to name-calling and put-downs. The vast majority of posters here are adult enough to carry on a conversation even if they don't agree. Those few posters are much like schoolyard bullies...and we all know their tactics!

[Catnip]

The only problem I have with unmoderated boards is that while, yes, there is no censorship and that is a refreshing thing, there is also no control over what is posted. People post vulgarities ... attack each other personally ... and spam posts abound. At least with moderators that sort of thing is controlled.

Guess it's a tradeoff, and we each have to decide where the greater benefits lie.

--rita

 

Agreed that it's a trade-off....and each person must decide for him/herself what is important to them. It's nice that there are so many choices here on the WWW! :) High censorship or low moderation.......there are plenty for every persons choice.

I am a member of one of the unmoderated boards and have been now for several months. One might be surprised to know that there have been NO spams, and NO personal attacks.

But, you can't beat CC for the sheer number of posters and tons of cruise-related information.

[HALOnlyCruiser]

I'd have to say my interest goes up and down depending on a lot of internal and external inputs. First of all is our cruise status. The closer we are to a cruise the higher my interest and therefore the more time I spend here.

There are periods where there are a series of posts seeking information, reviews, or the hot subjects (i.e., type of TA's, dress code, cell phones, smoking). Kind of a been there, done that and it gets old.

 

Randy made two good points that I would like to adopt as my own:)

Point One: I joined the CC HAL Board in April, after having just booked an Oosterdam/Alaska cruise. We returned in July. I duly posted a review, put my pictures on WebShots, and then discovered that I had nothing to look forward to..cruise-wise. Sad time.:(

So I immersed myself in getting our daughter ready to (sniff) go off to college. She is our youngest, and was my crusin'/travelin' buddy for many years, as my husband is unable to travel. The best part of that deal was a) it was something to keep my mind occupied, and b) another visit to Juneau :D to see her settled in to the dorm.

Having returned from that trip, I now find myself not only suffering from "No Future Cruise Syndrome", but the dreaded "Empty Nest Syndrome" as well. :( I know things will change, and I will become used to her not being around, but even visits to CC were short and nothing caught my interest.

After three weeks, I am trying to visit CC more often and read more threads. Now we come to...

Point Two: There does seem to be a lot of "multiple coverage" for lack of a better term. Either folks join the board and don't realize that they can search for the info they seek, or the excitement of an impending cruise causes the Instant Gratification Reflex, and they don't want to take the time to research an issue. But Randy is right. Sometimes it gets old. Right after I joined last spring, I answered many, many posts asking questions about my favorite subject and destination, Alaska (and made two or three pen pals in the bargain). I loved doing it, and hope that my advice was helpful. But you do get discouraged after you post your umteeth many-paragraphed, detailed replies; only to see the same question pop up the next day.

I'm not sure if this is what Sail7Seas had in mind, and I imagine my reason for being away as described in Point One is fairly unique. But it's a good topic. Thanks for asking.

[RevNeal]

That's OK, Rev......it's ok to disagree! ;) We obviously have a difference of opinion on this matter..........no harm done.

 

If only that were the case.

I have no problem agreeing to disagree about things that are of no consequence. Someone calling me a "fat tub of lard" can stay on the board for all eternity for all I care. But someone blasting the board with erroneous, made up, slanderous charges of me being "child-molester" can do a GREAT DEAL OF HARM to me, both personally AND professionally. I could end up in jail since, in our culture, clergy are judged "guilty until proven innocent" on such charges.

 

So ... sorry ... I disagree. There is GREAT HARM to be done unless a board is kept clear of such malicious, erroneous, slanderous charges. Otherwise ... I AGREE, the slap "Fat Tub of Lard" can remain. :)

[RevNeal]

Rev, that is really not anyones arguement. We all agree that hateful harmful stuff should be removed.

 

Apparently not. It would appear that Catnip thinks that such posts are ok.

:(

 

I agree with you, jc, that most of the posts that get removed probably should be removed. But some SHOULD BE, and I'm thankful that they are. :)

[xpcdoojk]

Apparently not. It would appear that Catnip thinks that such posts are ok.

:(

 

I agree with you, jc, that most of the posts that get removed probably should be removed. But some SHOULD BE, and I'm thankful that they are. :)

 

Revneal, I don't think that Catnip thinks calling someone maliciously a child molester should be allowed to remain. That is dispicable behavior, and I know Catnip in these forums for years and I know that she would one of the first to rush in to stomp the heck out of anyone that would attack someone else in that manner. Racism, antireligious, and other hateful views are not appropriate for these forums. I just don't think that these despicable things are what we are talking about in general. Any forum that allows the posting of slander or other viscious attacks should be ashamed of themselves and members of such forums that do not defend innocent people from such attacks are not people I want to participate with in a forum, on a cruise or in my neighborhood. I am truly sorry about the attacks that I know occur on the internet. If I ever see one, and I have in the 6 or 7 years I have been at CC, I can assure you I have and will continue to defend anyone attacked in such a manner. I have terriers and I have their tendencies. I have identified many unreasoned posters in these forums and I have no mercy on them.

 

However, I don't think my or Catnips posts are saying anything about those, we are talking about the big fat tub of lard variety. Unfortunately, with the the easily offended nature of people these days and the poofing nature of this forum it is impossible to see the difference they all go quickly poof as will this thread, because discussing the management of this forum is against the rules.:rolleyes:

 

jc

[HeatherInFlorida]

.................

I agree with you, jc, that most of the posts that get removed probably should be removed. But some SHOULD BE, and I'm thankful that they are. :)

 

Greg, correct me if I'm wrong, but I think you left out the word "not" in the first sentence above? Otherwise it doesn't make sense.

 

Normally, I wouldn't point this out, but in this case it completely changes what I think you're saying.

 

And couldn't agree with you more, btw.

[AlohaPride]

I do find myself posting less because i do not want to keep arguing with people... There is no point.

 

I do not stop reading/view the board though, because even in light of the many negative posts, there are a few very interesting tidbits of info.

 

I come here to become enlightened and to share a love of cruising with other folks all around the world. It is very sad when all you have are "trolls" posting stuff to start agruements and people wanting to start fights. Things do go in circles though, so i accept that!

 

I completely agree!! There is one specific post I just finished reading where the OP posted a very negative thread and every person who responded began with "Thanks for the ..." It's not until page 3 when people begin loosing interest in the topic the the OP comes back and stirs things up again by attacking those who posted thanks and comments earlier. Maybe the post belongs on a different board. I don't know. My point is that I READ the entire thread, but I did not post. I do this alot because I just don't want to get involved. I've got a cruise coming up in less than 3 mos, a GREAT group of people visiting my beautiful island in only a few weeks, and my new Weight Watchers program to focus on. :D Why would I want to throw myself into an argument?

[bonstersd]

I completely agree!! There is one specific post I just finished reading where the OP posted a very negative thread and every person who responded began with "Thanks for the ..." It's not until page 3 when people begin loosing interest in the topic the the OP comes back and stirs things up again by attacking those who posted thanks and comments earlier. Maybe the post belongs on a different board. I don't know. My point is that I READ the entire thread, but I did not post. I do this alot because I just don't want to get involved. I've got a cruise coming up in less than 3 mos, a GREAT group of people visiting my beautiful island in only a few weeks, and my new Weight Watchers program to focus on. :D Why would I want to throw myself into an argument?

 

I read the same thread as you, but I came away from it with a totally different opinion of it...the OP was attacked and was accused of trolling for giving a not so spectacular review of a cruise. The OP came responded after having been attacked for not coming back to the thread. My point is, I find it interesting that (supposedly) we read the same thread and we have two TOTALLY different opinions of it.

[NoNoNanette]

The OP of said thread WORKED ALL DAY, and finally has returned to the board.

 

She didn't attack anyone who THANKED her. She was merely defending herself from rabid protectors of a certain cruiseline.

 

Those people are like attack dogs! Shameful! :(

[AlohaPride]

I read the same thread as you, but I came away from it with a totally different opinion of it...the OP was attacked and was accused of trolling for giving a not so spectacular review of a cruise. The OP came responded after having been attacked for not coming back to the thread. My point is, I find it interesting that (supposedly) we read the same thread and we have two TOTALLY different opinions of it.

 

I just found the timing of it all interesting. I did not post on that thread because I didn't want to get involved. But there were maybe 3 who questioned the OP's motives and the rest were people who posted thanking the OP for the review, and then giving their experience on the HAL ships. I think that if a person posts an experience, and others have had the same or different experience they should share those as well. The OP was upset that the 3 questioned the post's motives AND the OP was upset that people were sharing their good experiences. Not a single person said the OP lied. But the OP interpreted it that way.

 

Personally, I see someone thank me, and I believe that they are thanking me and anything they say following that thanks is their Opinion. I don't believe that someone would thank me for a lie...

 

I didn't intend on changing the subject of THIS thread. My answer was that I read most posts and respond to a few.

 

I try to use the Smilies as often as possible to get across the tone of my communication as THAT is the hardest part of posting on these boards :D :o

[HeatherInFlorida]

...............I just don't want to get involved. I've got a cruise coming up in less than 3 mos, a GREAT group of people visiting my beautiful island in only a few weeks, and my new Weight Watchers program to focus on. :D Why would I want to throw myself into an argument?

 

Mary, if you'd like to get some great support during your new WW program, come join a wonderful group of people on our Lose Before You Cruise thread. We welcome everyone no matter what plan you're on. I can't begin to tell you what this thread has done for me. Take a look at the last 3 pages or so of it and you'll see that it's a very different "tone" from these boards. Try us, you'll like us;) ...ClickHere:)

[NoNoNanette]

Perhaps this board would be better served if the moderators DELETED POSTS attacking relatively new (or low post-count) posters. Can't you understand how intimidating it can be to be attacked on this forum???? :confused:

 

The posts that seem to be deleted are the ones that the "old guard" find questionable.

[Catnip]

Apparently not. It would appear that Catnip thinks that such posts are ok.

:(

 

 

Apparently, you misunderstood what I was trying to say. Sorry for any confusion this caused you or any other posters here. I certainly do not think the example you gave is appropriate for a cruise board, and I do not think it should remain. I was speaking of other things that would cause posts here to be poofed....and I'm sure the Mods could give you plenty of examples. Some people just don't like what someone else is saying, or maybe it hurt their feelings, or maybe someone said a "bad" word (horrors!).......things like that. That's what I was talking about......

Again, sorry for the confusion. Sometimes it's difficult to get your thoughts across in a short, typed message.

 

Peace

[Catnip]

I just don't think that these despicable things are what we are talking about in general.

However, I don't think my or Catnips posts are saying anything about those, we are talking about the big fat tub of lard variety. Unfortunately, with the the easily offended nature of people these days and the poofing nature of this forum it is impossible to see the difference they all go quickly poof as will this thread, because discussing the management of this forum is against the rules.:rolleyes:

 

jc

 

Thank you, jc.......for getting across what I was trying to & evidently not doing a very good job. ;)

[AlohaPride]

Mary, if you'd like to get some great support during your new WW program, come join a wonderful group of people on our Lose Before You Cruise thread. We welcome everyone no matter what plan you're on. I can't begin to tell you what this thread has done for me. Take a look at the last 3 pages or so of it and you'll see that it's a very different "tone" from these boards. Try us, you'll like us;) ...ClickHere:)

 

Thank you!! I'm checking it out now, WOW! 629 pages! Are the Harry Potter books even that long!? :D

[kikiwik]

Yes I do tend to stop reading and posting on here with threads because of the negativity, and some of the know it all's and there comments.

[Hojo's redbeard]

This Board, like all others, goes in spurts of negativity from time to time, I think.

 

Do you find that if there are many negative posts and there is lots of complaining you find yourself reading the Board less and posting less? Or does it make no difference to you whether the mood seems to be in a more positive or negative phase?

 

Sail,

 

I'm glad your thread was still on page one, that way I didn't have to go looking for it.

 

Negative threads don't turn me off to the boards. I like to read between the lines and form my own opinion.

 

As for posting less, lots of people read and don't post. Nothing wrong with that. Probably a lot of people would be afraid to post after reading how some people are answered.

 

I'm not going to bother looking at the HAL board anymore unless I have a specific question between now and when we leave next month. I've grown weary of the atmosphere overall on this board. There are a lot of people who for some reason feel like it is their place to scold someone for asking a question that has been asked several times. Also, too many of the posts are people that treat this as their chat room and personal domain.

 

Everyone needs to remember to be helpful to the newbies, you were there once. Not everyone knows all of the ins and outs of this board. Be Nice!

[RevNeal]

Greg, correct me if I'm wrong, but I think you left out the word "not" in the first sentence above? Otherwise it doesn't make sense.

 

Normally, I wouldn't point this out, but in this case it completely changes what I think you're saying.

 

And couldn't agree with you more, btw.

 

Correct ... the "not" got left out. I don't know how. :)

 

To make sure I'm understood: "most of the posts that get removed probably should not be removed."

 

:)

[RevNeal]

Revneal, I don't think that Catnip thinks calling someone maliciously a child molester should be allowed to remain. That is dispicable behavior, and I know Catnip in these forums for years and I know that she would one of the first to rush in to stomp the heck out of anyone that would attack someone else in that manner. Racism, antireligious, and other hateful views are not appropriate for these forums. I just don't think that these despicable things are what we are talking about in general. Any forum that allows the posting of slander or other viscious attacks should be ashamed of themselves and members of such forums that do not defend innocent people from such attacks are not people I want to participate with in a forum, on a cruise or in my neighborhood. I am truly sorry about the attacks that I know occur on the internet. If I ever see one, and I have in the 6 or 7 years I have been at CC, I can assure you I have and will continue to defend anyone attacked in such a manner. I have terriers and I have their tendencies. I have identified many unreasoned posters in these forums and I have no mercy on them.

 

However, I don't think my or Catnips posts are saying anything about those, we are talking about the big fat tub of lard variety. Unfortunately, with the the easily offended nature of people these days and the poofing nature of this forum it is impossible to see the difference they all go quickly poof as will this thread, because discussing the management of this forum is against the rules.:rolleyes:

 

jc

 

I read, understand, and appreciate your statements.

And, obviously from Catnip's clarification, my objection is dropped. :)

[RevNeal]

Apparently, you misunderstood what I was trying to say. Sorry for any confusion this caused you or any other posters here. I certainly do not think the example you gave is appropriate for a cruise board, and I do not think it should remain.

 

Thank you very much ... I appreciate that greatly.

 

I was speaking of other things that would cause posts here to be poofed....and I'm sure the Mods could give you plenty of examples. Some people just don't like what someone else is saying, or maybe it hurt their feelings, or maybe someone said a "bad" word (horrors!).......things like that. That's what I was talking about......

 

And, as I stated, we agree with you on that. Indeed, if the moderators were not so quick to cut the kind of "violating posts" you're referencing, some of the apologies I've posted when I've offended someone or put my foot in my mouth would not have been cut and hurt feelings might have been reduced. In short, we don't need to agree to disagree.

 

Again, sorry for the confusion. Sometimes it's difficult to get your thoughts across in a short, typed message.

 

Tell me about it! Indeed! In one of my responses earlier on this thread I left out a "not" ... which totally changed the meaning of my post!!! :D Ah, the joys of internet posting!!! :D