Cruise Ships are really small cities

[joan72761]

I just came back from a wonderful cruise. I won't mention what cruise line or even where we went but I wanted to remind all cruisers that you are ultimately responsible for your own safety, and parents, you are responsible for the safety of you children. Whether they are 3 years old, 13 yrs old or 17, it is up to you to give them rules on the ship and to ensure they follow those rules. My teen told me that a pre-teen was assaulted on our cruise. I dearly hope this is not true, and if it is, I hope that they caught the individual responsible and I hope they give him an appropriate sentence, but that will not take away the nightmare that girl went through. Too many parents think their kids are safe because they are on a large ship. The cruise lines are not police and the youth camps/clubs and the individuals running them are not the police. The cruiselines do not ask cruisers if they are criminals and even if they did who would tell the truth? If you or your children just met these new friends on the cruise, you don't really know them. Most of them are probably wonderful, honest people, but all it takes is one to create a nightmare. Parents make sure your kids know not to go to other cabins, not to go off separately with people they really just met and You, parents, you need to know who your kids are with and where they are at. Have a safety talk before you cruise, have fun on your cruise and come home with lots of wonderful memories. Cruising really is the best way to see the world.

[reallyitsmema]

Even though you don't mention the cruiseline or ports in your post, all anyone has to do is look at your prior posts to figure out which line you are talking about.

 

I have not seen any threads posted about this incident yet. Many people will post links to news articles they find reporting crimes on ships. Not saying it didn't happen, as many cruisers don't even know cruise critic exists. Maybe someone else who was on the cruise will have some more information.

 

Hopefully, they caught whoever assaulted this child.

[crusinmama06]

I think its important to say the name of the cruise line and the ship so that people can understand that this can happen and to always be aware of where your children are and who they are with.

 

So I'll be the bad guy, you were on Royal Caribbean Monarch of the Seas.

 

It really is a small city. You are so right. I saw a review today that said that their 12 year old had the "run of the ship" and it made my skin crawl. :(

 

I have seen a report of a crew member having child porn on his computers. I have seen a report of a passenger who was a child pornographer being arrested when the ship docked. On another ship, 2 teens were asked to come back to a cabin by some adults where they were fed alcohol and then sexually assaulted.

 

I remember doing some REALLY stupid and dangeous things as a pre-teen and as a teen. I can see how kids can be talked into anything. Parents need to be diligent about keeping an eye on their kids. Don't put your guard down and think nothing can happen on a cruise ship.

 

And my heart goes out to the girl and her family if this is in fact a true story. :(

[akcruz]

To the OP, sorry you had to have something like that happen to put this all into perspective. We have been sailing with our kids for a number of years and they are now teens. We do make sure to sit down with them before leaving home and again once on the ship to go over the rules. Through the years on CC with the help of many other posters we've put together the following 'contract' for our kids. I am sure there is more that could be added, but for now this works for us. My son has spent some time with us when rules weren't followed. He quickly learned there is no wiggle room and listens now (as far as I know, keeping my fingers crossed).

 

To any parent out there, even good kids forget sometimes, its always best to keep reminding them, and thanks OP for reminding everyone to keep parentingeven if you are on vacation.

 

Contract

 

First of all we want all of us to have fun. This should be a relaxing, enjoyable vacation. We hope that noting our expectations and rules before we depart will avoid any misunderstandings on-board. Note that violation of these rules will result in you being required to stay with us or in your cabin and therefore you will not be able to participate in any of the teen activities. These rules are not in place to say that we do not trust you, but to ensure we can all enjoy our trip.

• You are not to enter any cabins other than ours. It does not matter if it is the cabin of a new friend or someone we know (unless one of us expressly approves this).

• No one else is to enter our cabins.

 

• If you are in your cabin alone – hang the do not disturb sign on the door. This should prevent any RCCL employee from entering. Please ensure you remove it when you leave the room.

• You are not to drink any beverage unless it is handed to you by a family member or an RCCL staff member. You are not to drink from anything you have let out of your sight. Some people have been known to slip drugs into other people’s drinks. This is a lifelong rule that should be followed in any social situation.

 

• We expect to know where you are on the ship. We will use notes in our cabin to let each other know where we can be found.

• You are not to loiter or play in the stairwells, hallways, or elevators. Activities such as “knock and run” or calling other cabins to hang up will not be tolerated.

 

• We will decide on a curfew each night. The ship’s curfew is 1 AM since you are under 18. We have the right to require you to be in the cabin earlier if we feel the need.

• Your Sea Pass is tied to my credit card. It is to be used only by you. You may not buy other people drinks, snacks, arcade games, or souvenirs. You have a budget of $xx. If you exceed this budget without our approval, you will need to reimburse us.

• If you loose your Seapass you are to immediately notify one of us.

 

• We expect to eat dinner together most nights. There is flexibility if there is an alternate activity you would prefer to attend as long as we have discussed it in advance (at least that morning).

• If there are kids you would prefer to hang out with instead of the teen club, I need to meet them.

• If you order room service, you must tip the delivery person. We will provide a small amount of money for this.

 

• If we arrange a check-in time and you miss it then you are “grounded” for the next 24 hours. This means that you must stay with us or in your cabin.

 

• No visits to the outside areas of the upper deck at night alone.

 

• Put anything of value into the cabin safe. Cell phones are only to be taken out of the safe when we ask you to. Texts and calls are expensive and not in your budget.

• Do not leave the ship without one of us.

[crusinmama06]

akcruz, GREAT TIPS! Your post should be a sticky at the top of the page. :)

[quincytoo]

To the OP, sorry you had to have something like that happen to put this all into perspective. We have been sailing with our kids for a number of years and they are now teens. We do make sure to sit down with them before leaving home and again once on the ship to go over the rules. Through the years on CC with the help of many other posters we've put together the following 'contract' for our kids. I am sure there is more that could be added, but for now this works for us. My son has spent some time with us when rules weren't followed. He quickly learned there is no wiggle room and listens now (as far as I know, keeping my fingers crossed).

 

To any parent out there, even good kids forget sometimes, its always best to keep reminding them, and thanks OP for reminding everyone to keep parentingeven if you are on vacation.

 

Contract

 

First of all we want all of us to have fun. This should be a relaxing, enjoyable vacation. We hope that noting our expectations and rules before we depart will avoid any misunderstandings on-board. Note that violation of these rules will result in you being required to stay with us or in your cabin and therefore you will not be able to participate in any of the teen activities. These rules are not in place to say that we do not trust you, but to ensure we can all enjoy our trip.

 

• You are not to enter any cabins other than ours. It does not matter if it is the cabin of a new friend or someone we know (unless one of us expressly approves this).

 

• No one else is to enter our cabins.

 

 

• If you are in your cabin alone – hang the do not disturb sign on the door. This should prevent any RCCL employee from entering. Please ensure you remove it when you leave the room.

 

• You are not to drink any beverage unless it is handed to you by a family member or an RCCL staff member. You are not to drink from anything you have let out of your sight. Some people have been known to slip drugs into other people’s drinks. This is a lifelong rule that should be followed in any social situation.

 

 

• We expect to know where you are on the ship. We will use notes in our cabin to let each other know where we can be found.

 

• You are not to loiter or play in the stairwells, hallways, or elevators. Activities such as “knock and run” or calling other cabins to hang up will not be tolerated.

 

 

• We will decide on a curfew each night. The ship’s curfew is 1 AM since you are under 18. We have the right to require you to be in the cabin earlier if we feel the need.

 

• Your SeaPass is tied to my credit card. It is to be used only by you. You may not buy other people drinks, snacks, arcade games, or souvenirs. You have a budget of $xx. If you exceed this budget without our approval, you will need to reimburse us.

 

• If you loose your Seapass you are to immediately notify one of us.

 

 

• We expect to eat dinner together most nights. There is flexibility if there is an alternate activity you would prefer to attend as long as we have discussed it in advance (at least that morning).

 

• If there are kids you would prefer to hang out with instead of the teen club, I need to meet them.

 

• If you order room service, you must tip the delivery person. We will provide a small amount of money for this.

 

 

• If we arrange a check-in time and you miss it then you are “grounded” for the next 24 hours. This means that you must stay with us or in your cabin.

 

 

• No visits to the outside areas of the upper deck at night alone.

 

 

• Put anything of value into the cabin safe. Cell phones are only to be taken out of the safe when we ask you to. Texts and calls are expensive and not in your budget.

 

• Do not leave the ship without one of us.

 

LOVE this, we have had most if not all of these rules in place with each and every cruise. Also we had the rule of ..... If you are in the teen Zone and we go in to check on you (which we do quite often) and you are NOT there.....please know that life, as you know it, ends as soon as we see you and decide who you want your Xbox and P3station to go to because you are never seeing them again.....other then that have fun and don't do anything you don't want us catching you doing :D

[jean s]

These are great suggestions. My ds is now an adult but my 19 year old niece is going to be living with us this summer and I am going to borrow a number of your ideas. Thanks

[Keith1010]

While our children are now adults when they were growing up we took them on a cruise each year. I applaud the information in the OP and some of the subsequent information. Things can happen anywhere and that includes cruise ships. In fact, parents need to establish rules with their own children to help ensure that they do not run into problems but that they too are not the cause of problems. When you are with thousands of people that you don't know you cannot assume that each person is just like you. This is a good reminder for everyone regardless of their age.

 

I also want to note with the new ship carrying over 5 passengers plus a crew of a few thousand these ships now carry a total number of people that are greater than many towns in the USA and around the world.

 

Keith

[cruzzza]

AKCRUZ - One of the best posts on here! DD is only 2, but I plan on keeping this thread in my favorites for later use!

[akcruz]

Thanks everyone, but I can't take the credit for making this list. All I did was take what I've learned from this board and past experiences. Wanted to give back some of what I've gotten from reading these posts. Enjoy!