Is a little etiquette too much to ask for?

[Gathina]

Exactly. Look at the flap the President got for giving the Queen of England an ipod. I'm sure she was thrilled..LOL

 

It seems that I should explain more precisely what I meant regarding my statement about the increasing number of passenger’s coming from differing cultural and socioeconomic backgrounds. While it is certainly true that having good manners (etiquette) has more to do with a person’s upbringing than their social or economic status the precise behaviors involved in good manners do vary from place to place. The more a person travels the more evident this becomes.

 

 

Also, cultural traditions do play an important role in manners, as do religious beliefs, social status, and economic class. What may be good manners in the White House may be considered grossly inappropriate in the Kremlin. A standard of behavior which is perfectly acceptable in rural Mexico might be considered inappropriate in a meeting with the Prime Minister of Canada. Typically, people learn the manners which pertain to their particular social, economic, and cultural situation, and travelers should learn certain rules of conduct to adapt while in the company of people of other societies. Rude is rude in any language and social situation.

 

 

While the specific nature of good manners may vary, the underlying principles do not. Good manners involve treating people with respect and courtesy, and in making sure that other people feel comfortable in social situations. The old Biblical rule of “do unto others...” is a good illustration of how manners are supposed to work. Sadly this lesson has either never been taught, has been forgotten or has fallen on deaf ears.

[NCTribeFan]

Report to the muster station when told to do so. It would all be over with quickly if people would simply arrive when they're supposed to.

 

Report to your excursion meeting place when told to do so. I'm tired of arriving on time only to have to wait for the laggards and have my excursion cut short. If only the tour operators would leave these people behind. See, there's absolutely no consequence in NOT following instructions, so why should they?

 

THERE IS NO NEED TO SPEAK TO PEOPLE WHO ARE STANDING NEXT TO YOU IN A VOICE LOUD ENOUGH FOR SOMEONE 100 YARDS AWAY TO HEAR YOUR EVERY WORD. People, just because you're loud doesn't make you important. It just makes you obnoxious. Sure, we all get a bit loud at times when we're having fun, but way too many people these days simply SPEAK AT THE TOP OF THE VOICES AT ALL TIMES.

 

If you go to afternoon tea, please don't treat it like you're sitting outside at the pool drinking beer. Have a little consideration for your fellow passengers and show some respect for the musical entertainment. Some of us actually enjoy listening to the classical trio.

[bela47911]

I know what you are talking about.

 

Have watched the changes over the years -- and we are not enchanted by cruising as we once were.

 

Today's generation show's that they were not raised as we were -- i.e. -- both parents had/have to work -- the children are left to do their own thing. Many families don't even sit down to eat together any more. The schools haven't been teaching etiguette for well over 20 years now -- at least where we live they haven't been teaching it.

 

Wow that is soooooo untrue! I raise my children with respect and manners and her school teaches the same (yes its a private school but I feel that is best for her). What I find alot of the time is the elderly people have lost and forgotten to use their manners and get very impatient or the youth and in turn no manners.

 

Just yesterday my daughter and I were at the theatre and as we were leaving our seats and walking down the stairs, I allowed 2 older ladies to step out and go down the stairs first (even though they were sooooo slow), I never got a thank you. Then we were going through the closed doors and they didn't even bother holding it open for us. Just let it slam in our faces. Total disrespect. So it is not just the younger people. Lets look at everyone because elderly people are too blame also!

[AltarEgo]

People that talk endlessly on their cell-phones

 

People that slam their doors

 

People that crowd the corridors

 

People that block the doorways

People that sit on the stairs

 

People that hog the hot tubs

 

People that always arrive late for dinner

 

People that are inconsiderate smokers

 

People that don’t know their limits with food, gambling and alcohol

[printingchick]

Might I add one more thing?

 

Elevator usage

Use the same rules for using elevators that you would use on land: wait for others to get out before you get on. Move to the back of the elevator if more people need to get on. And if people in the back need to get out, please step out and let them get by, then step back in.

 

I was about to add this one. Thanks!!!

[BroncosFan2010]

Most cruise lines have certainly diverged from their earlier marketing strategy of promoting an air of affluence and glamor. They are now marketing the impression of an affordable product within everyone’s reach while projecting a ‘fun ship’ image. This new image has proven to be very prosperous for the industry as evidenced by their growth in spite of the economic downturn. It has also spurred the emergence of a new demographic of people who are choosing a cruise vacation. There are now passengers onboard that come from a multitude of cultural and socioeconomic backgrounds. While the vast majority of my interaction with fellow passengers has been favorable it's becoming increasingly apparent that some of them do not realize that a little etiquette is order.

 

One of the very few drawbacks of a cruise vacation is the necessity of sharing relatively limited public areas. Onboard a cruise ship space is at a premium. While it is true that you paid hard earned cash for the vacation, it is important to be considerate of the others.

 

I’m sure this topic has been discussed before but it’s worth revisiting. There are a few common sense suggestions that don’t take a lot of effort to employ and will help everyone enjoy their cruise vacation. There are many more “rules” that could be added to this short list and by all means, add them to the discussion. The ones listed below seem to be the most often ignored.

 

Please wait your turn.

There are times when certain areas of the ship will develop fairly long lines and waiting will be inevitable. Please respect the fact that everything moves in a more efficient manner when order is maintained, even if it means you may have to wait a few extra minutes to accomplish your objectives.

 

Follow the suggested dress codes.

I’m sure you heard it before, “it’s my vacation and I dress however I want”. This may be true, but there are also thousands of other people onboard with whom you chose to share your vacation. If you choose to dine in the Main Dining Room there are many people that look forward to formal dining nights and it’s really selfish to ruin it for them because it is “your vacation”. Read the daily program to find out what the appropriate attire is for each evening and dress accordingly or dine in a more suitable venue.

 

Keep your “little darlings” under control.

While you may find it entertaining to watch your kids do cannonballs into the hot tub other people will not be amused. Just because you are on vacation does not relinquish you from your parental responsibilities. For everyone’s safety and well being keep your children under control and please, never leave them unsupervised.

 

Do not be a Chair Hog

This is exceedingly selfish behavior. I will never understand what makes someone think they have the right to selfishly deny others the right to use the public amenities they also paid for. It’s a pitiful sight to see the ship’s pool deck being held hostage by chair hogs.

 

 

It’s pretty simple, if you’re considerate of others and exhibit some common courtesy, you’ll enjoy your trip more and so will the people around you.

 

 

Well said. I agree with you completely. If we model good etiquette, perhaps other will follow.

[mapsmith]

It seems that I should explain more precisely what I meant regarding my statement about the increasing number of passenger’s coming from differing cultural and socioeconomic backgrounds. While it is certainly true that having good manners (etiquette) has more to do with a person’s upbringing than their social or economic status the precise behaviors involved in good manners do vary from place to place. The more a person travels the more evident this becomes.

 

 

Also, cultural traditions do play an important role in manners, as do religious beliefs, social status, and economic class. What may be good manners in the White House may be considered grossly inappropriate in the Kremlin. A standard of behavior which is perfectly acceptable in rural Mexico might be considered inappropriate in a meeting with the Prime Minister of Canada. Typically, people learn the manners which pertain to their particular social, economic, and cultural situation, and travelers should learn certain rules of conduct to adapt while in the company of people of other societies. Rude is rude in any language and social situation.

 

 

While the specific nature of good manners may vary, the underlying principles do not. Good manners involve treating people with respect and courtesy, and in making sure that other people feel comfortable in social situations. The old Biblical rule of “do unto others...” is a good illustration of how manners are supposed to work. Sadly this lesson has either never been taught, has been forgotten or has fallen on deaf ears.

 

 

Footzz, I agree with most of your comments. However, I will take issue with the comment about what is acceptable in Rural Mexico may not be acceptable when meeting the Prime Minister of Canada. My interactions with "campesinos" or the "countrymen" of Mexico, is that they often have better manners than some of our politicians. Any Campesino will doff his hat to a prime minister (or anyone they perceive to be of higher rank) Many will quietly and sincerely ask or offer any help that you may want. And all is done respectfully. Manners are manners, no matter what your social situation. I will continue to wear a tuxedo on formal night or even on "elegant night" whatever you may feel elegant may mean.

[Cruisin' Chick]

The lack of etiquette is rampant in our society, regardless of culture or socioeconomic status. There are selfish people who don't wait their turn, don't take responsibility for their children, hog chairs. etc at ALL levels of society, just as there are considerate and generous people. When I was a child, my family was poor and both my parents worked, but we were taught (by their words and their model) to be kind and considerate of others.

 

I agree. Some people with money are often the worst offenders. They feel their bank balance justifies treating the crew members rudely or pushing in front of the line.

 

I blame it on cell phones!

 

I got flamed on a cell phone thread (even though some others were agreeing with me that if you want to make a call, go to your cabin). The phone zombies (as my hubby and I call them) seem to expect everyone else to drive around them or wait patiently in line while they gab before realizing it's time to pay the cashier. Or discuss their private business in the middle of a restaurant loud enough that everyone knows what bank transactions they're making.

 

People that talk endlessly on their cell-phones

 

People that slam their doors

 

People that crowd the corridors

 

People that block the doorways

 

People that sit on the stairs

 

People that hog the hot tubs

 

People that always arrive late for dinner

 

People that are inconsiderate smokers

 

People that don’t know their limits with food, gambling and alcohol

 

also the one about elevator etiquette. When the door opens, let people exit, before going in. If there's someone in a wheelchair, let them ahead of you. You can always take the stairs or wait for the next elevator. If you're getting off an elevator or escalator or leaving a building, immediately move aside and not block others' paths.

[RetireeWannabee]

Ettiquette being taught in schools??? Not when I was a kid, and not now (around here/public schools). Teachers have their hands full as it is.

 

Manners, consideration for others, etc., is the job of parents. Always was, always will be. I do not expect the school administrators to add this to their list. I want my tax dollars to go towards literacy, academic growth and preventing drop outs, while I want the parents to take care of creating civilized little humans. Private schools can do whatever they want.

 

It was nice when "the village" was there for parents to support each other - "I know you will not let my little Billy get away with anything" - but that's when most families had the same values, morals, standards for behavior. Attended the same churches, kids had the same rules (home when the street light comes on), went to the same schools, etc. We are much more fragmented now.

[paul929207]

Ettiquette being taught in schools??? Not when I was a kid, and not now (around here/public schools). Teachers have their hands full as it is.

 

Manners, consideration for others, etc., is the job of parents. Always was, always will be. I do not expect the school administrators to add this to their list. I want my tax dollars to go towards literacy, academic growth and preventing drop outs, while I want the parents to take care of creating civilized little humans. Private schools can do whatever they want.

 

It was nice when "the village" was there for parents to support each other - "I know you will not let my little Billy get away with anything" - but that's when most families had the same values, morals, standards for behavior. Attended the same churches, kids had the same rules (home when the street light comes on), went to the same schools, etc. We are much more fragmented now.

It is definitely not the teacher's job to teah proper manners. They have their hands full just trying to maintain order and teach the subject matter.

[grod19]

Teachers shouldn't have to teach proper manners but they should enforce them. I know I used proper manners in school because I was scared to death of what would happen if I came home and my teacher had called my parents to discuss any inappropriate conduct on my part.

 

I am a firm believer that it is very helpful if kids think mommy or daddy is a little crazy. I hated getting punished because my father thought of the most wacky insane punishments. If I made the mistake again punishment would be twice as bad.

[GlendaleCruiser]

Teachers shouldn't have to teach proper manners but they should enforce them. I know I used proper manners in school because I was scared to death of what would happen if I came home and my teacher had called my parents to discuss any inappropriate conduct on my part.

.

 

Unfortunately, there is only so much that teachers can do, because the only parents who care and come to the teacher conferences are the parents who don't need to because they have already taught their kids to behave well. The ones who haven't don't return the calls or show up. And there are no real consequences anymore, because daddy's lawyer will sue the district and the teacher for her retirement program and the home she is struggling to pay for.

[paul929207]

Most teachers try to encourage proper behavior because it will help create a better learning environment.

[goldengreeke]

The lack of etiquette is rampant in our society, regardless of culture or socioeconomic status.

So true. People don't even dress up for church anymore. Same with weddings and funerals, going down town, out to eat, etc,etc.

[GlendaleCruiser]

Most teachers try to encourage proper behavior because it will help create a better learning environment.

 

 

Absolutely! But some kids don't respond to encouragement of proper behavior. I hear the stories first hand.

[BosoxI]

I guess I'm lucky but with the blatant exception of a cruise on the Crown Princess 2 weeks ago, I have found most people to be very polite. Of course, there'll always be a few. My nit pick is with table manners-not using utensils properly, wearing caps at the table, etc, Stuff that really doesn't effect me but bothers me. Guess I'm showing my years.

[RetireeWannabee]

caps at teh table - yesterday was our annual holiday luncheon here at work. not formal, of course, but many people do dress up for it and the presentation that precedes it, and it's certainly one of our nicer staff benefits (oooo, table linen!)

 

I have to say that I was irritated by the guy at the next table wearing a knit cap. really, we're INDOORS, and there should be no caps at a dining table.

 

It did take away from what I consider "The Annual Parade of Holiday Sweaters" and I didn't think I cared about stuff like that.

[Bernardcraig20]

I had a great time reading around your posts as I read it extensively. Keep the posts rocking!

 

 

Regards,

Gold Coins

[imsulin]

I was once on a Princess cruise and it appeared to me that those with many years had lost the concept of manners. To name a few use of doorways, upon passing through a doorway , wheather an elevator door or dinning room door, this became an immediate stopping place for conversation thereby blocking the passage. Stairways, as three ancients were ascenening astride one looks at the other and says "Hey let's stop and look". At this point I took it upon my self to scool these Ancients in proper maners on a staircase ne. A couple of words is all it took.

 

As an "Ancient", I really take offense at your post. At what age do you define an "Ancient"? After re-reading your post, I find that "wheather", "dinning room", "ascenening" (what????), "scool", "maners", "my self" and "ne" to be very offensive to me!

[jaybird from SC]

All things said, we can't blame the cruise lines for lax behavior on the part of the passengers. It isn't just on cruise ships that attitudes, dress codes, courtesy, manners, etiquette, etc. have declined. There are rude people everywhere you go. We love to cruise and the misbehavior of a few isn't going to cause us to quit. That's my opinion. :) Merry Christmas and Happy cruising everybody!

[bar_20]

Sorry to the parents who both work and think they are bringing their kids up propper. Most of you answering had your parents both working as well if you were born after 1970.

 

I avoid cruises anymore that sail in the summer, holidays or school breaks. I also like 14 day or longer cruises. I also now know which cruise lines get the dollar store types and who gets the Nordstrom types. I am not affaid to speak up if someone cuts in line. I get to shows early so there are plenty of seats that havn't been "saved" by clods. I don't swim anymore so I try to find lounge chairs that are away from the pool.

 

It's not up to the cruise lines to teach people manners, however maybe the first day they should have a manditory manners siminar. Todays generation wants everything right now, and their "it's all about me" attitude. Most are blind to other people and could care less about them.

 

If you are in a buffet line or ordering food on deck, know what you want. Look at the menu up on the board before you are at the front of the line, courtesy goes both ways. Don't make people wait behind you because you had your head up your a.. and weren't ready to order.:mad:

[footzz]

I took the liberty of composing and editing a list of the grievances so far.

Here they are in no particular order:

 

 

People that don’t wait their turn

People that don’t follow the suggested dress codes

People that don’t keep their children under control

People that hog chairs

People that push in the buffet line

People that don’t follow instructions for disembarkation

People that don’t show any respect

People that commandeer the elevators

People that aren’t aware/concerned about their body odor

People that don’t report to the muster station when told to do so

People that speak at the top of their voices at all times

People that talk endlessly on their cell-phones

People that slam their doors

People that crowd the corridors

People that block the doorways

People that sit on the stairs

People that hog the hot tubs

People that always arrive late for dinner

People that are inconsiderate smokers

People that don’t know their limits with food, gambling and alcohol

People that wear caps at the table

The cruise lines not enforcing their own rules

[mr green]

I took the liberty of composing and editing a list of the grievances so far.

Here they are in no particular order:

 

 

People that don’t wait their turn

People that don’t follow the suggested dress codes

People that don’t keep their children under control

People that hog chairs

People that push in the buffet line

People that don’t follow instructions for disembarkation

People that don’t show any respect

People that commandeer the elevators

People that aren’t aware/concerned about their body odor

People that don’t report to the muster station when told to do so

People that speak at the top of their voices at all times

People that talk endlessly on their cell-phones

People that slam their doors

People that crowd the corridors

People that block the doorways

People that sit on the stairs

People that hog the hot tubs

People that always arrive late for dinner

People that are inconsiderate smokers

People that don’t know their limits with food, gambling and alcohol

People that wear caps at the table

The cruise lines not enforcing their own rules

 

Pretty good, just one more,

 

Be respectful to crew members, who, at times may have an unpleasant job to do. I try to treat the crew as I would my own family.

 

john

[Cruisin' Chick]

Unfortunately, there is only so much that teachers can do, because the only parents who care and come to the teacher conferences are the parents who don't need to because they have already taught their kids to behave well. The ones who haven't don't return the calls or show up. And there are no real consequences anymore, because daddy's lawyer will sue the district and the teacher for her retirement program and the home she is struggling to pay for.

 

Unfortunately, some of the classtime gets devoted to teaching how to take those Leave No Child Behind tests. Lots of time.

 

I've had some situations with some kids bullying my daughter and some school administrators seemed hesitant to do something about it. In one case, we think there was something political (the father probably has lots of $ and probably has backed some politicos) so nothing happened to his daughter. The other case, the boy must have gotten someone feeling sorry for him. Until we got the principal involved, who interviewed some of the boys in the class who said he was being mean to my daughter. The problem was the assistant principal who kept giving him second and third chances here and there for special honors which he obviously didn't deserve (being on the student council even though the teacher advisor wanted him removed, getting to introduce a speaker at culmination, getting his essay selected -- most likely by that AP -- for character counts honors). I imagine he's running into the same problems in middle school. Thank goodness he's not at my daughter's middle school.

 

caps at teh table - yesterday was our annual holiday luncheon here at work. not formal, of course, but many people do dress up for it and the presentation that precedes it, and it's certainly one of our nicer staff benefits (oooo, table linen!)

 

I have to say that I was irritated by the guy at the next table wearing a knit cap. really, we're INDOORS, and there should be no caps at a dining table.

 

It did take away from what I consider "The Annual Parade of Holiday Sweaters" and I didn't think I cared about stuff like that.

 

Perhaps he needed to wear that cap for medical reasons. Often cancer victims need to keep their heads warm after losing their hair from treatment.

[lt]

Oh Yes! This drives me crazy. But, it's not only happening on cruises. How many brains does it take???? The door opens and you can't get off because somebody has their nose to the other side as if they may miss it!