Keeping track of teen on the ship

[kmcmichael]

Cruising with a 12 year old - parents how do you keep track of the kids on the boat? I am hoping she meets some friends, but hesitant to go off too far without us.

[kitty9]

Ships are like small towns, with all the inherent problems. Personally, I don't think a 12 year old should be given complete freedom on a cruise ship, and I would make sure there are rules, such as not accepting drinks from people she doesn't know (not even soft drinks or water), no going into anyone's cabin and not bringing people into your cabin. She's going to meet other kids in the kids club, where they will have activities for her age group. You can set up times during the day when you'll meet and she will check in with you. One thing you'll have to decide is how much freedom she'll have at night.

[Keith1010]

We alway had set times and locations to meet throughout the day.

 

We went over the rules before we boarded the ship and also the first day.

 

Keith

[LA_CA_GAL]

Cruising with a 12 year old - parents how do you keep track of the kids on the boat? I am hoping she meets some friends, but hesitant to go off too far without us.

 

You have gotten good advice.

 

Been there and done it with my kid on cruises.

 

A lot has to do with the maturity of the kid.

 

Some kids (grade school age) from my area ride buses/trains in the big city every day to and from school.

 

Obviously, their maturity and life experiences are vastly different from one's raised on a farm in the country.

[mamkmm2]

Some cruise lines/ships tend to be stricter about the movement of unattended minors around the ship. Check with the kids' program if you are signing them up for that. They have to scan in and out with their cruise card and sometimes it is a scan in and stay in until their registered adults comes to get them.

 

I don't know specifically about other cruise lines but on a Princess ship a 12 year old will be in the youth center and not with older teens. That doesn't happen until after they are 13. A 12 year old would be in the "Shockwave" program that is for 8 to 12 year olds and does have stricter rules than the older teens.

[packer99]

My son is 11. We let him do things on his own. He has a cell phone and with NCL we got the iconcierge app so we could text him etc. He's pretty responsible kid. We let him go do the ropes course by himself numerous times, and he knew what pool bar we were at or he went back to the room. He pretty much had full fun of the ship but he always knew to tell us where he was going.

[mamkmm2]

Whatever your choice please remember that a kid is a kid and the cruise lines have had their own problems with molesters and kids getting hurt. Disney, Cunard and Carnival (and perhaps others as well) have had crew arrested and convicted of molesting kids. Cruise ships are full of strangers ... some of them drunk strangers ... who may not have the same behavioral boundaries as your family. I'm not judging, nor am I trying to tell you what to do. I have five kids of my own, from adult with a baby on the way to a 12 year old, and I'm just sharing our own cautious decisions.

 

Whether they join the kids' activities or not, make sure they know what the rules are, what the plans are, and what the consequences are if they fail to hold up their end of the bargain. Then follow through. And include the use of the ship's app which is actually pretty useful at keeping track of each other though there may be limitations if the kids are in a directed activity in the kids' space area.

 

Just my 2 cents.

[Kartgv]

There's a recent thread on the Princess board that should be required reading for all parents taking teens on a cruise:

 

http://boards.cruisecritic.com/showthread.php?t=2346262 (Our Teen's Experience with Ruby Princess Security)

 

The kids in this story are a little older, but it's never too early to discuss the topic with yours. Don't worry, it's not a horror story, in fact it's a template for how things SHOULD happen when something isn't quite right. It also might give parents some ideas for the kinds of discussions you should be having with your teen before the trip. In fact, it's a good discussion point even if you're not going on a trip!

Edited April 21, 2016 by Kartgv

[Gingee]

We use to have walkie talkies with our girls. Maybe now there is something better to stay in contact.

[cb at sea]

First...you don't allow them to "roam at will"...set limits, and tell them when and where they can go. YOU are in charge! Make sure they know that they have rules, and limits! 12 is hardly a "teen"...they are kids...treat them as such!

[mjkacmom]

First...you don't allow them to "roam at will"...set limits, and tell them when and where they can go. YOU are in charge! Make sure they know that they have rules, and limits! 12 is hardly a "teen"...they are kids...treat them as such!

 

I'd say a 12 year old is almost a tee. We let our 10 and 12 year olds off on their own, provided we knew where they were, just like at home.

[MrsPete]

Ships are like small towns, with all the inherent problems. Personally, I don't think a 12 year old should be given complete freedom on a cruise ship, and I would make sure there are rules, such as not accepting drinks from people she doesn't know (not even soft drinks or water), no going into anyone's cabin and not bringing people into your cabin. She's going to meet other kids in the kids club, where they will have activities for her age group. You can set up times during the day when you'll meet and she will check in with you. One thing you'll have to decide is how much freedom she'll have at night.

These are all good rules for teens -- most of them having to do with safety, which is absolutely appropriate. Definitely talk to them about accepting drinks from other people. Definitely talk to them about going into cabins. Kids don't think anything bad can happen to them, so it's up to parents to set the limits.

 

I'd add:

- It should go without saying that the kids should not leave the ship without you. Say it to the kids. In my experience, when you make your expectations crystal clear, it prevents trouble later.

 

- MAKE your daughter go to the first night kids' club activities. On the first night no one knows anyone, so it'll be easier for her to fall into a group.

 

- When our kids were younger, we maid it their responsibility to check in with us mid-morning, lunchtime, and mid-afternoon. They were responsible for finding us. We'd talk a bit, hear what they'd been doing, what they were planning. Our rule was, Miss check in, hang out with Mom and Dad for the rest of the day. It was never a problem; in fact, they tended to find us more often than required.

 

- If they wanted to eat breakfast or lunch with friends, they needed to tell us (or leave us a note) just so we wouldn't wonder /wait.

 

- We always ate dinner together as a family, and after dinner we were together as a family. If the kids wanted to go to a club event, we'd drop them off /pick them up, but we did not allow wandering around after dark with groups of new friends.

[Cruisin' Chick]

We use to have walkie talkies with our girls. Maybe now there is something better to stay in contact.

 

There are better ways to stay in touch. Those don't always work on ships and also risk bothering other passengers. I know that my teen wouldn't want to lug around a walkie-talkie at all.

 

These are all good rules for teens -- most of them having to do with safety, which is absolutely appropriate. Definitely talk to them about accepting drinks from other people. Definitely talk to them about going into cabins. Kids don't think anything bad can happen to them, so it's up to parents to set the limits.

 

I'd add:

- It should go without saying that the kids should not leave the ship without you. Say it to the kids. In my experience, when you make your expectations crystal clear, it prevents trouble later.

 

- MAKE your daughter go to the first night kids' club activities. On the first night no one knows anyone, so it'll be easier for her to fall into a group.

 

- When our kids were younger, we maid it their responsibility to check in with us mid-morning, lunchtime, and mid-afternoon. They were responsible for finding us. We'd talk a bit, hear what they'd been doing, what they were planning. Our rule was, Miss check in, hang out with Mom and Dad for the rest of the day. It was never a problem; in fact, they tended to find us more often than required.

 

- If they wanted to eat breakfast or lunch with friends, they needed to tell us (or leave us a note) just so we wouldn't wonder /wait.

 

- We always ate dinner together as a family, and after dinner we were together as a family. If the kids wanted to go to a club event, we'd drop them off /pick them up, but we did not allow wandering around after dark with groups of new friends.

 

Good rules here. If your teen doesn't want to be glue to your hip, he/she needs to check in every once in a while. The watch one's drink rule is important no matter where (that was a piece of advice my daughter's pediatrician gave her last year as she was about to leave for college).

 

Definitely have your child go to the kids' area the first night as that's when they meet each other. You didn't say which cruise line, but on some like Princess, the teen program starts at 13.