HAS ANYONE DONE A BURIAL AT SEA OF ASHES?

[juju2454]

 I am trying to wade through the requirements to do this.  I would like to do it in December on our cruise at Xmas.  Anyone done this that can help me through it?  NCl just sent a generic reply of which I have no true understanding.

 

TIA

[phillygwm]

5 hours ago, juju2454 said:

 I am trying to wade through the requirements to do this.  I would like to do it in December on our cruise at Xmas.  Anyone done this that can help me through it?  NCl just sent a generic reply of which I have no true understanding.

 

TIA

I found this article but not specific to NCL.  As many of us have discovered, some reps are better than others so you may need to call them back more than once,

 

  https://www.cruisecritic.com/articles.cfm?ID=3462

[chengkp75]

There are several old threads about this, on various forums, try a search.  At a minimum, you will need a copy of the death certificate, and a copy of the certificate of cremation.  This will be for both the cruise line and the TSA if you are flying with cremains.  When you notify NCL that you wish to do this, they will direct you to contact Guest Services when you board, and the Captain will determine a day and time for your service (it has to be more than 12 miles from shore).  You will need a biodegradable urn, with a certificate that it is biodegradable.  If you wish to put flowers in the sea as well, it is best to arrange this with NCL, as there are strict rules about what can be in the floral arrangements (no metal or plastic of any kind).  On the day of your service, the Environmental Officer will take you to the after mooring station (as far aft and down low as possible), where he/she will give instructions, and then step away to give you privacy during your memorial.  You cannot open the urn, the entire urn must go into the sea closed, no "scattering" of ashes.  Afterwards, the Captain will send you a certificate showing the latitude and longitude where your loved one's ashes were committed.

[TSUmom]

56 minutes ago, chengkp75 said:

There are several old threads about this, on various forums, try a search.  At a minimum, you will need a copy of the death certificate, and a copy of the certificate of cremation.  This will be for both the cruise line and the TSA if you are flying with cremains.  When you notify NCL that you wish to do this, they will direct you to contact Guest Services when you board, and the Captain will determine a day and time for your service (it has to be more than 12 miles from shore).  You will need a biodegradable urn, with a certificate that it is biodegradable.  If you wish to put flowers in the sea as well, it is best to arrange this with NCL, as there are strict rules about what can be in the floral arrangements (no metal or plastic of any kind).  On the day of your service, the Environmental Officer will take you to the after mooring station (as far aft and down low as possible), where he/she will give instructions, and then step away to give you privacy during your memorial.  You cannot open the urn, the entire urn must go into the sea closed, no "scattering" of ashes.  Afterwards, the Captain will send you a certificate showing the latitude and longitude where your loved one's ashes were committed.

Great information...My DH and I have talked about this and wondered how it was done.

[ChiefMateJRK]

5 hours ago, chengkp75 said:

There are several old threads about this, on various forums, try a search.  At a minimum, you will need a copy of the death certificate, and a copy of the certificate of cremation.  This will be for both the cruise line and the TSA if you are flying with cremains.  When you notify NCL that you wish to do this, they will direct you to contact Guest Services when you board, and the Captain will determine a day and time for your service (it has to be more than 12 miles from shore).  You will need a biodegradable urn, with a certificate that it is biodegradable.  If you wish to put flowers in the sea as well, it is best to arrange this with NCL, as there are strict rules about what can be in the floral arrangements (no metal or plastic of any kind).  On the day of your service, the Environmental Officer will take you to the after mooring station (as far aft and down low as possible), where he/she will give instructions, and then step away to give you privacy during your memorial.  You cannot open the urn, the entire urn must go into the sea closed, no "scattering" of ashes.  Afterwards, the Captain will send you a certificate showing the latitude and longitude where your loved one's ashes were committed.

Thanks.  That's interesting.  I don't really care what happens to my ashes, but my heirs might (probably not).  I just want them to NOT have them sitting around on the mantle for decades saying "there's Dad."

 

disclaimer: we don't actually have a mantle

[charlie murphy]

1 hour ago, ChiefMateJRK said:

Thanks.  That's interesting.  I don't really care what happens to my ashes, but my heirs might (probably not).  I just want them to NOT have them sitting around on the mantle for decades saying "there's Dad."

 

disclaimer: we don't actually have a mantle

No mantle no problem! Build a pedestal! a big one. I don't think I have ever been put up on a pedestal, but your post gives me hope. "There's dad on that BIG A## pedestal he built for himself". Sounds good.  I have to plan a trip to Greece and Italy , research! 

Edited September 29, 2022 by charlie murphy

[ChiefMateJRK]

32 minutes ago, charlie murphy said:

No mantle no problem! Build a pedestal! a big one. I don't think I have ever been put up on a pedestal, but your post gives me hope. "There's dad's BIG A## on that stupid pedestal he built for himself". Sounds good.  I have to plan a trip to Greece and Italy , research! 

FIFY.

[SliderNc]

My father worked for many cruise lines in the 60s, 70s and 80s before going shoreside as an electrical engineer for the MCT.  He spent 52 years on cruise ships and his wish was to be buried at sea.

 

I called NCL after we had booked and was directed to a "special services" division (this was in 2015 so it might have changed).  I emailed them copies of his death certificate and the cremation certificate.  Since we had not chosen an urn for him originally, we ordered a biodegradable one from the funeral home and they helped us transfer the ashes to it, as they had to be taken out of the plastic bag they were in.  We brought the certificate with us to show that the urn was biodegradable.  The special services representative send us a confirmation email and had copied guest services on the BA on it with a note that they would get in touch with us on embarkation day.

 

Embarkation day came and we met with the manager of guest services and one of the captain's staff.  They had setup the time for us to go down to the mooring deck on the first sea day (NYC - Bermuda) to do the ceremony.  They verified everything with us and then took us to the private room where we were having a small reception afterward to make sure it would be okay for what we needed. 

 

1st Sea Day came and we met at Guest Services and was surprised to find the Captain there with the Guest Services Manager.  We came to find out that the captain and my father had worked together back in the 80s when he was much younger and working his way up the chain.  They led us down to the mooring deck, where they had carpets and a platform setup for us and a small table.  We put our stuff on the table (urn, pictures, flowers that they had gotten for us) and they reviewed the safety stuff with us.  We did our small ceremony, gave everyone their chance to say their last goodbye (which it really wasn't because every time we go to our beach house, we say hello to him) and then my sister and I put him in his final resting place.  We then had a small social gathering where we cracked a bottle of Johnny Walker Blue (my dad's scotch of choice) and made a few toasts to him.

 

It went really smoothly for us.  I'm sorry for your loss OP.  Hope this information on what we did and to expect is helpful.

[ChiefMateJRK]

5 minutes ago, SliderNc said:

We then had a small social gathering where we cracked a bottle of Johnny Walker Blue (my dad's scotch of choice) and made a few toasts to him.

That right there is CLASS!! 😎

[MoCruiseFan]

14 hours ago, juju2454 said:

 I am trying to wade through the requirements to do this.  I would like to do it in December on our cruise at Xmas.  Anyone done this that can help me through it?  NCl just sent a generic reply of which I have no true understanding.

 

TIA

 

 

Hi Tia.  Yes people have done this.  Can you please post the reply you received?

[agrimm01]

15 hours ago, juju2454 said:

 I am trying to wade through the requirements to do this.  I would like to do it in December on our cruise at Xmas.  Anyone done this that can help me through it?  NCl just sent a generic reply of which I have no true understanding.

 

TIA

I'm not sure how formal you want to be.  But, on our Greece cruise last year my wife brought her dad and 2 sisters cremains.   All 3 had passed away within the previous year (tough year!).  At every port my wife would take some of their cremains and distribute them on the beach while I took her picture and we celebrated them.

[juju2454]

4 hours ago, ChiefMateJRK said:

Thanks.  That's interesting.  I don't really care what happens to my ashes, but my heirs might (probably not).  I just want them to NOT have them sitting around on the mantle for decades saying "there's Dad."

 

disclaimer: we don't actually have a mantle

That's kinda where we are at this  point. with both my parents.  I have them both, and it is a "there's _____.   My mother grew up across  from the ocean in Australia, and told us stories about her days then.  It seems fitting.   My father I just kinda got "stuck" with because other sibs were angry with him( I wasn't thrilled) but I can't just make a funeral home hold him for ever( and here they legally have to I found out)  So for me this is a good way to move them to a place of rest and not leave it for my daughters to have to deal with.  They will be there for this release.

[juju2454]

1 hour ago, MoCruiseFan said:

 

 

Hi Tia.  Yes people have done this.  Can you please post the reply you received?

Hi, there,  I'm actually juju2454 the tia was thanks in advance  😉 

 

Memorial Service Flower and/or Human Ashes

Mar 28, 2019•Knowledge

INFORMATION

The disposal of flowers and/or human ashes at sea in accordance with MARPOL, EPA and other Company policy is permitted. Natural, not artificial flowers and cremated ashes may be disposed at sea beyond 12 nautical miles from the nearest land. Flowers and/or flower arrangements should have no plastic wrappers, ties or frames attached. A small amount of wire or non-plastic string would be permissible to hold it together. Ashes may be scattered overboard or discharged in a bio-degradable urn only (no plastic or metal urns).   

The above applies to all international vessels and all seas at 4 nautical miles.

Pride of America never reaches 12 nautical miles, so no requests for this will be approved.

Guests must be advised to bring the following documents onboard with them, as required by Port State Authorities and Auditors. 

• Death Certificate.
• Burial Transit Permit.
• Certificate of Cremation.

NOTE:  Memorialization’s of this type cannot be performed in the Canadian waters including their Exclusive Economic Zone (EEZ). Canadian waters to 200 nautical miles.

Requests must be submitted to the Special Events Department via email.

[juju2454]

26 minutes ago, agrimm01 said:

I'm not sure how formal you want to be.  But, on our Greece cruise last year my wife brought her dad and 2 sisters cremains.   All 3 had passed away within the previous year (tough year!).  At every port my wife would take some of their cremains and distribute them on the beach while I took her picture and we celebrated them.

This is actually illegal to do, so not an option.  The rules are 3-12  nautical miles off shore.  Many countries would have not appreciated doing that.   But thank you for the reply.

[juju2454]

2 hours ago, SliderNc said:

My father worked for many cruise lines in the 60s, 70s and 80s before going shoreside as an electrical engineer for the MCT.  He spent 52 years on cruise ships and his wish was to be buried at sea.

 

I called NCL after we had booked and was directed to a "special services" division (this was in 2015 so it might have changed).  I emailed them copies of his death certificate and the cremation certificate.  Since we had not chosen an urn for him originally, we ordered a biodegradable one from the funeral home and they helped us transfer the ashes to it, as they had to be taken out of the plastic bag they were in.  We brought the certificate with us to show that the urn was biodegradable.  The special services representative send us a confirmation email and had copied guest services on the BA on it with a note that they would get in touch with us on embarkation day.

 

Embarkation day came and we met with the manager of guest services and one of the captain's staff.  They had setup the time for us to go down to the mooring deck on the first sea day (NYC - Bermuda) to do the ceremony.  They verified everything with us and then took us to the private room where we were having a small reception afterward to make sure it would be okay for what we needed. 

 

1st Sea Day came and we met at Guest Services and was surprised to find the Captain there with the Guest Services Manager.  We came to find out that the captain and my father had worked together back in the 80s when he was much younger and working his way up the chain.  They led us down to the mooring deck, where they had carpets and a platform setup for us and a small table.  We put our stuff on the table (urn, pictures, flowers that they had gotten for us) and they reviewed the safety stuff with us.  We did our small ceremony, gave everyone their chance to say their last goodbye (which it really wasn't because every time we go to our beach house, we say hello to him) and then my sister and I put him in his final resting place.  We then had a small social gathering where we cracked a bottle of Johnny Walker Blue (my dad's scotch of choice) and made a few toasts to him.

 

It went really smoothly for us.  I'm sorry for your loss OP.  Hope this information on what we did and to expect is helpful.

Thank you this indeed tells me I have  to make a call to them not just an email.   Thank you for the condolences, it has been years now since either passed away, but it is just time to give them a place of final rest and not my closet or "mantle" ( it is actually a ginger jar in a glass cabinet)  and not leave this task to my daughters.  Dh and I have already expressed we would lie this done for us if they could,  

[juju2454]

10 hours ago, chengkp75 said:

There are several old threads about this, on various forums, try a search.  At a minimum, you will need a copy of the death certificate, and a copy of the certificate of cremation.  This will be for both the cruise line and the TSA if you are flying with cremains.  When you notify NCL that you wish to do this, they will direct you to contact Guest Services when you board, and the Captain will determine a day and time for your service (it has to be more than 12 miles from shore).  You will need a biodegradable urn, with a certificate that it is biodegradable.  If you wish to put flowers in the sea as well, it is best to arrange this with NCL, as there are strict rules about what can be in the floral arrangements (no metal or plastic of any kind).  On the day of your service, the Environmental Officer will take you to the after mooring station (as far aft and down low as possible), where he/she will give instructions, and then step away to give you privacy during your memorial.  You cannot open the urn, the entire urn must go into the sea closed, no "scattering" of ashes.  Afterwards, the Captain will send you a certificate showing the latitude and longitude where your loved one's ashes were committed.

I did indeed try a search, their search engine is difficult at best and sucks at worst LOL.  I have the death certificates or can get the one I don't have,  and the  containers they came back in ( they were both donate to science for 2 years per their requests) that  has it attached to them) and will be getting water dissolvable eco approved urns or envelopes for them each,  They were not together in life at the end, so will not be together in death if I can arrange it.  Other wise I will do one in December and one in April of 2023 on a different cruise.   

If you can find these threads ( I cannot after many tries)  please feel free to post them I would greatly appreciate that.

[ChiefMateJRK]

I have seen a copy of an actual will that stipulated that after cremation, the ashes were to be mixed into the cat liter pan and disposed of in the garbage.  I don't believe it was a joke.  It was a firm statement that "I HAVE MOVED ON TO A BETTER PLACE AND AM NOT THESE STUPID ASHES.  MOVE ON!"

[chengkp75]

1 hour ago, agrimm01 said:

I'm not sure how formal you want to be.  But, on our Greece cruise last year my wife brought her dad and 2 sisters cremains.   All 3 had passed away within the previous year (tough year!).  At every port my wife would take some of their cremains and distribute them on the beach while I took her picture and we celebrated them.

 

37 minutes ago, juju2454 said:

This is actually illegal to do, so not an option.  The rules are 3-12  nautical miles off shore.  Many countries would have not appreciated doing that.   But thank you for the reply.

Actually, based on the first post, I looked up Greek regulations on scattering of ashes.  Greece was the last European nation to allow cremation, and their rules are relatively new (less than 20 years).  Scattering of ashes is allowed in "public places well away from residences".  And, while the US allows scattering outside of 3 miles, there is no "outside" limit of 12 miles, you could do it mid-Atlantic if you wanted.  In general, in Europe, you can scatter ashes over land provided you have the landowner's permission, and there are few rules regarding scattering at sea, and most of these deal with not sending non-biodegradable items with the ashes.

[chengkp75]

 

I know none of these is for NCL, but the policies are very similar across all lines.  There was one on NCL a few months back, where one poster even claimed they had a letter from NCL saying that they provided cremation service onboard.  That one might have gone poof, though.

[juju2454]

1 hour ago, chengkp75 said:

 

Actually, based on the first post, I looked up Greek regulations on scattering of ashes.  Greece was the last European nation to allow cremation, and their rules are relatively new (less than 20 years).  Scattering of ashes is allowed in "public places well away from residences".  And, while the US allows scattering outside of 3 miles, there is no "outside" limit of 12 miles, you could do it mid-Atlantic if you wanted.  In general, in Europe, you can scatter ashes over land provided you have the landowner's permission, and there are few rules regarding scattering at sea, and most of these deal with not sending non-biodegradable items with the ashes.

Yu do however need permission, of where. I too looked it up out of curiosity.   I know that it is actually 3 nautical miles here, but will be doing it off their ship so will abide by their rules.  🙂 

 

[juju2454]

1 hour ago, ChiefMateJRK said:

I have seen a copy of an actual will that stipulated that after cremation, the ashes were to be mixed into the cat liter pan and disposed of in the garbage.  I don't believe it was a joke.  It was a firm statement that "I HAVE MOVED ON TO A BETTER PLACE AND AM NOT THESE STUPID ASHES.  MOVE ON!"

Well to each their own,  but neither left any specific desires,  so it was left up to me.  She never believed in the "better place" thing.  She was always one to say, if you're dead you're dead.  So in the thought I think her childhood stories is what lead me to the sea again.  She literally lived across from the ocean in Australia until  her first husband died in WW2,  (shot by a sniper), she came here to meet his family ( he was a marine and born here)  and never went back home.  Became a citizen.  But her stories of what fun they had in the sea is my go to.  My father died too suddenly to have made any arrangements,  heart attack and 2 days and gone.  So again it was left up to me what to do with the remains.  

I have more respect than to mix with cat litter,  he was a veteran  too, so he at least deserves to be placed somewhat respectfully.  This is my answer to both.

[juju2454]

9 minutes ago, ChiefMateJRK said:

Just to be clear.  I didn't suggest (or condone) that.  It was an actual will that somebody drafted.  Flip over that coin and you'll find that some would consider "respecting mere ashes" in contrast to focusing on who the person was (and is) would be the ultimate in disrespect.

and yet this is based on the actual person and her life and memories.  She lived across from the ocean so this is totally respecting her person.  

[agrimm01]

14 hours ago, juju2454 said:

This is actually illegal to do, so not an option.  The rules are 3-12  nautical miles off shore.  Many countries would have not appreciated doing that.   But thank you for the reply.

Yea, we really felt like Bonnie and Clyde.  LOL

[CptBoatface]

Ya gotta weight it down with stones. And teeth scattered separately.  Wait, Mugsy, what's that? Oh, ashes, totally different 

 

But seriously, the Admiral and I have considered this, glad it's an option 

[DebbieCruises]

We buried both my mom and dad at sea from the NCL Breakaway in 2018.  I sent a note to NCL telling them of my parents wishes to be buried at sea from an NCL ship and they were very helpful in guiding me through the whole process.  I did book several cabins for family members to join us and we were in the Haven area, which may have helped, but still everyone was incredibly kind, considerate, and helpful.  I bought two dozen roses (their favorite flowers) and brought them with us.  NCL gave me a basket to put the flowers in.  We removed the petals from the stems, so each family member could toss a handful of petals from the side of the ship after my brother and I each tossed one of the biodegradable urns into the ocean.  My son-in-law's father is a minister so he gave a brief service and prayer before we tossed them, too. We were escorted to lower level of the ship (I think deck 4 or 5) and an environmental officer had to stay with us to be sure that we only tossed the urns and flower petals (which he inspected first) into the water.  But saying this, I want to emphasize how respectfully and kindly everything was handled.  My parents would have been very happy and I pray they were watching it all and smiling as it happened.

 

I wish you well with whatever you decide, but I can truthfully we could not have asked for a better experience.

 

Oh, one more thing, we ordered the biodegradeable urns from the funeral home and they provided the necessary paperwork for both the flight and the ship. They packed the urns in special boxes for travel and we had to take them on the plane with us as extra carry -on luggage. (Thankfully, we flew Southwest Airlines so there was no extra charge.) You are required to show the paperwork to TSA, at the gate, and of course before boarding the ship too.  Do NOT try to put it with or in your checked luggage.