Safety for preteens and young teens

[Lvmommy2k]

Hi all! We’re taking a cruise this summer and looking for tips on how to keep my preteen & young teen safe. Both my daughter (13) and my son (11) have been cruising since they were young. However this year, they want to be able to go around by themselves with the friends they make on the ship. We’ve already set rules that they can’t go in anyone’s cabin/no one allowed in ours, not allowed to go to room only floors (besides our own), they have to check in every hour via iMessage or carnival hub, don’t leave drinks unattended. What else can I do? My daughter is unfortunately very physically mature for her age and I’m worried about men mistaking her for older than what she is. 

[happylittlefamily]

Seems you've done as much as you can.  Every ship I've been on for the last year has quite a bit of security presence, so that should give you peace of mind.  Our kids are always together, which helps.  Hope you all have lots of fun!

[sparks1093]

Just remind them that they need to be alert at all times to what is going on around them, but I agree that you've covered as many of the bases as you can. (I also reminded mine that wherever they went they were on video.) 

[jsglow]

I think you've done a great job.

One more tip. Trust the parenting you've done over this last decade. 👍

Our kids very much enjoyed their teen years aboard. I never remember dealing with a 'situation'. These type of talks continue over the next several years. All part of growing up.

[Drazil65]

You have a really good list started.  I guess where as you are having them check in via phone we had DS check in every hour in person (just while not in a ship sponsored activity) with at least one of us.  We would agree to a meeting place and all be there.  If they are just hanging out with the friends they meet on the ship then they are doing nothing important that they cannot stop to check in with parent(s).  Many times DS did not want to go back to the group he was with (for many reasons) and opted to stay with us or go on to another activity.  We always had our meals together.  

 

If he was in a ship sponsored activity then we would just have him check in after activity over.  We have seen way too many kids that age running the ship, unchecked as if the ship was a giant playpen and the parents were off just living their best life. 

 

We were lucky in the DS wasn't the follow the crowd kind of kid BUT you really dont know how other kids were raised.  Bullying can be a real thing on a ship especially out of sight of parents.  Maybe have that conversation with your kids so they know they should leave the group if they witness that behavior.  

 

 

Edited May 21 by Drazil65

[coondog99]

You seem to be on top of it with a good set of guidelines.

Our two boys (19 and 23 this year) have cruised with my wife and I since they were little. The last two cruises they each brought a friend which helps with keeping them occupied and safe when on board and out by themselves. My wife and I get a balcony and the kids get an interior cabin near us. Trust is a huge factor with that. 

 

Funny story (before Carnival Hub and wifi) ......when our oldest was in his mid-teens, we were on a cruise and he gathered with a group of kids his own age from the Carnival Club that included another boy he/ we got to know on a previous cruise. At around 1230am, he wasn't back to his cabin so we went out looking for him including a member of the other boy's family who also hadn't returned. Couldn't find them anywhere. We never really doubted their safety but needed to ease our minds. Where were they? Ship front to back/ up and down decks.....no where to be found. Finally, I met up with the other friend's family member about 20 minutes later who tells me he found them. Where? In the library....sitting as a small group of 6 or 7....talking. Yup, behaving and acting like adults. We never got mad at them but told them it was time for bed. 🙂 

[kctwinmommy]

Seems like you've hit the main points. I would also say, since you mentioned your daughter's appearance and concerns, she shouldn't be off on her own then. Make sure she hangs out with other kids. Safety in numbers! Hope they have a great time!

[angelsfort]

I always told my daughter that she could use me as an "excuse" if something was going on with the group she was with, that she didn't want to participate in... or if she just wanted to get away from them for a bit.  She could claim that she had to check in with me, or that I had messaged her and asked her to come back to the cabin.

so she could leave the group and not look like she was a "chicken" or whatever kids call each other nowadays.

 

she did actually use that excuse a couple of times and was thankful that it was an option for an escape

 

 

she's 21 now and still occasionally does it!  LOL she'll message me and say that if anyone asks (usually a roommate who has my number) that I needed her to help me with something  LOL

Edited May 21 by angelsfort

[Cruising_Addict]

Honestly, what you can do is raise them right. Plain and simple. Smart kids who were raised right know how to stay out of trouble. It's not difficult. 

[aggie182]

We have similar rules and so far so good.  We also try to figure out where they're hanging and we drop in from time to time.  On the Spirit over Thanksgiving, it seemed like the kids hung out in the jungle hall when they weren't in the kid's club.  We'd drop in there every so often to keep them on their toes.  

[x lindsay x]

2 hours ago, Cruising_Addict said:

Honestly, what you can do is raise them right. Plain and simple. Smart kids who were raised right know how to stay out of trouble. It's not difficult. 

Unfortunately, predators don't care how your kid was raised - see the note about making sure your drink is always attended. Bad stuff can happen to good kids.

[mjkacmom]

We first sailed with our 5 when they were 4 - 11, and they all experienced cruising as tweens/teens. They’d make friends and take off after breakfast. I know ships are big but have a finite amount of public spaces. We saw them in our daily travels all of the time.

[silvercrikhix]

It’s great to hear you asking for comments  That makes me think they won’t be the hall running, elevator button pushing, screaming & littering kids. Honestly, as far as your daughter, people thought I was 20 when I was 12 so I know what that’s like. Considering that a cruise ship is basically a floating city, she should be extremely careful about who she’s with & where.
Maybe make sure she’s not alone. Meet friends in public places, pick her up in a public place if need be. It’s a different ‘game’ with her for sure. Hopefully, you have discussed her situation thoroughly with her.  Being informed will be her best defense.  

[hurricane0226]

sailed with our 14 yr old grandson on spring break in march. we set rules for him, as far as checking in with us, dinner time, bedtime. he met up with a group of boys his age in the club, and became good friends, they exchanged phone numbers, and emails, and facebooks, never had a problem, they were all safe, and had a great cruise, trust in them a little, and they may Suprise you.  

[KaiBlue]

A lot of good suggestions here.  I would add that as a mom of 3 daughters who are now all grown, I would agree with @silvercrikhix that preparing your daughter about the potential for her to be approached by an older person is helpful.  That way she will feel a little more armed in how to handle the situation.  If she stays with a group, I'd say most people would leave them alone (and not think she is older) but my daughters have been approached by older men while standing practically next to me and I saw their confusion on how to handle the situation.    I think discussing it with them helped them feel a little more in control during a situation that can seem odd/frightening to a young teenager. 

[Lvmommy2k]

Thank you all for your words of support! It makes me feel so much better about letting my kids off the proverbial “leash”. I know they are good kids and make good choices- I just worry about the actions of others. ❤️ 

[Elaine5715]

1 hour ago, Lvmommy2k said:

Thank you all for your words of support! It makes me feel so much better about letting my kids off the proverbial “leash”. I know they are good kids and make good choices- I just worry about the actions of others. ❤️ 

I haven't seen adults really approach any younger folks for some type of interaction in the general areas.  I would note that the public area whirlpools are for all ages and conversation between "soakees" is common, regardless of age.  Will a stranger initiate a conversation with a teen?  Most likely.  Will the adult assume the teen is older than they are?  Good possibility.  I can't tell if most teens are 13 or 18 anymore, definitely can't if my glasses are off.  Teens who sneak onto Serenity may certainly be assumed to be over 21, given the signage.    

[KyloRen]

On 5/20/2024 at 10:08 PM, Lvmommy2k said:

Hi all! We’re taking a cruise this summer and looking for tips on how to keep my preteen & young teen safe. Both my daughter (13) and my son (11) have been cruising since they were young. However this year, they want to be able to go around by themselves with the friends they make on the ship. We’ve already set rules that they can’t go in anyone’s cabin/no one allowed in ours, not allowed to go to room only floors (besides our own), they have to check in every hour via iMessage or carnival hub, don’t leave drinks unattended. What else can I do? My daughter is unfortunately very physically mature for her age and I’m worried about men mistaking her for older than what she is. 

 

hi!!! I sail carnival for 90% of my cruises. My Daughter is 14 and son is now 12. They’ve been on 10 cruises in the last two years and I think you already did your due diligence. Every hour you might find is a bit much greene but you can adjust that as you go along though.
 

My kids always have their own room I just ask they be in it by 10p unless they ask or are at a scheduled activity. I tell my kids the same about going into others rooms or inviting people into their room. But I don’t have the floor rule, yI find there is too many activities on various floors. My daughter is in the same boat. I can hardly tell the difference in these three images between 12.13 and last month on the Firenze at 14!

 

Edited May 25 by KyloRen