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Posts posted by aoknkentucky

  1. Do I get you, Anita? Yep, I think I do. Big. Time.


    I decided this year when I turned 60 that I would be fine with me as a person the way I am. Would I like to weigh less and be healthier? Yes. Would I, should I, could I (insert item of choice)? Yes, definitely, but I’ve decided that I won’t. Is that my Tuttle Type 1 disconnect? Maybe. I don’t care. I’m done with it. Projects—cross stitch, scrapbooks, yarn and sewing materials? Check! Weight gain around my middle? Yes, definitely disproportionate. Do I handle stressful situation? Sure I can and do. Do I avoid negative feelings? I didn’t in the past, but recently, I’ve needed to take that path. Does it cause additional stress? Yes, tremendous stress.


    I’m in the countdown stage to retirement and the stress of could I financially, would I really be happier with a freer schedule, should I work a while longer? It is a great source of stress. I retired on disability several years ago, but that was a totally different story. Medically I could no longer do the job so the job retired me rather than an active decision on my part. Even then, I was back to work within four months. I don’t mention how I feel about it to anyone in my life. So, yeah, I have a little bit of unexpressed emotion.


    It speaks. Darn it!

  2. The key... This would be a good solution, but I haven't found one yet.


    I like Talbots, LandsEnd, strategic pieces from Chicos, and some Boden, probably in that order, but I can't commit to just one store. I have a friend that walks into Chicos and buys the outfit from the mannequin, every single piece! She says she knows it is a complete outfit and she doesn't need to think about it. THAT would drive me NUTS!


    I know that I would have to find more than one...I know I love the Desigual store that we found in Barcelona. Such fun clothes. That would be my go to line for fun casual clothes. Sadly, I've regained so much weight, I don't fit into their sizing scheme right now. I love Anthropologie too, but the funny thing there is that the store is full of all different designers...so that's a mixed bag. Again, though, fun casual. But that would be the majority of what I would wear... And sadly again, the sizing there is a bit rough...the styles I like the best aren't the most flattering right now...


    Could you sew something up that fits this fun casual look? I'm "on the cusp" as some like to say. I'd love to be a smaller size, but realistically, I'm just not ready to do the work that would involve right now. On the brighter side, I CAN look really nice in a 1X-16W size, and just like the Misses sizing, when things go on deep discount, that's when the smallest items are usually still available.


    I did finally wear a wonderful blazer that I got from Anthropologie on clearance last season. It's a double breasted blazer made from novelty sweater knit...and it has texture blocking (it doesn't really have different colors) so it's very fun. I wore it on the field trip to Georgia Southern last week...It was the perfect upgrade to might go to hoodie...just as comfortable but definitely more stylish.


    Sooo, stylish cute casual? I like the sound of that. My BFF told me recently that I dress very casually. She didn't mean it as a put-down, but it did make me stop and think. I'd rather be known as dressing stylishly casual--maybe even casually stylish--but I'm afraid she's right. I am very much a casual dresser, but have been trying to up my game and dress more stylishly. It has been a long journey and the road has been bumpy along the way.


    Debbie...you are NOT a downer. Are you saying you are Type 1? I do the same thing with DH. There are things that weigh on me around the house...things that I know I should be doing...could be cleaning up the kitchen...could be projects that I've been wanting to do for a long time...but instead, I chose to be with DH, because in the end, that is more important to me...and more satisfying in the moment. And I think to myself...someday...


    Thanks Margaret and Anita for the vote of confidence. I'm usually just thinking out loud with everyone here, but realize sometimes I might not come across on paper the way my voice would want to be heard.


    I had to go back yesterday and refresh myself on the Dressing Your Truth videos. I'm not sure that I ever took the online course if it involved answering questions. I guess I just watched several of the videos and grabbed on to the light, bright clothes of Type 1 since I knew those were the right colors. I still haven't answered any questions, I was never able to find any (if there ARE any), but in true Debbie fashion, I can't decide on my own which type I am. Sound familiar? LOL I'd say that I'm a Type 1 with a VERY strong Type 3 or maybe a Type 3 very strong Type 1 secondary. I've slowed down with age, aches and pains, but back in the day I could get mountains of things done, motivate others to join in my endeavors and was never happier than when I was bringing new ideas and plans to fruition. Of course I believe I can get this great idea to work. I'm going to MAKE it work and everyone is going to help me. Yes, very strong Type 1 and very strong Type 3 here. I think it's part of the reason I was so disappointed that we didn't make the FIRE/EARTH cruise thing work. I usually CAN have and idea and make things work and don't mind doing the work. It's fun!


    [AUOTE]I enjoyed that video Margaret. I am careful with what I look at. My degree is Marketing and one lesson that I learned that really, really, REALLY stuck with me is the one about information. When we first come across information...we can look at the source of information and can make a determination as to whether or not we give credence to the information...qualifying it's validity based on the source...but as time marches on...we lose the connection to the source of information and are left with just the information...and lose our ability to determine if it's valid info based on the source...so other things factor in, and often, since we have the information...we can believe that the information is valid and true.


    It's the main reason why I will often try to reframe info into what matters to me...reframe the info into an application for myself that makes sense to me, that I believe, so as I retrieve that info, I feel more confidence in the truth. But often, that means that I can't explain it as well to others that don't have the same truth.


    I've never thought about the information I take in quite that way, Anita, but I think it is a wise way of processing information.


    So, "cute" was the key word in the eBook for Type 1. Cute works for me because of my personal definition of cute...and the way DH and I use that word. My definition of cute would include the concept of attractive playfulness, fun, and positive energy. A sort of animation that wasn't pushy. Colorful. Light-hearted. Sunshine. It isn't "adorable" or "sweet"...it's more accessible than beautiful...more real than pretty...it's an earthy, granola, fun-loving kind of attractiveness...


    Cute...as portrayed by some of the Type 1s...especially Tuttle's daughter-in-law...is kind of annoying. A little too childlike for me. I think I have a strong secondary Type 4...and definitely there are aspects of the Type 1 stereotype that I find very off-putting.


    I agree that the word cute means many different things to many people. I guess, I agree with Anita that I look at cute as fresh, bright, and light. The cute as portrayed by the videos seems more cutesy and that's a whole 'nother ball game to me. One that I don't care to participate in at all!


    And yes, it's the application of the typing that is the most annoying thing of it all. There are endless applications. I'll let Mom share her story, but we have talked about how what she does is in line with her type, even if it isn't necessarily in line with the way Tuttle imagines it to be for an example.


    I can't wait to hear Pam's revelations. She brings such a different perspective to the table from me that I've never thought to even think about. Very insightful always and I appreciate her thoughts. It helps. Trememdously!


    I found the video to be enlightening and reminding me of other ways that I fall into the Type 1. Like you Margaret...I lose the shoes and jewelry, FIRST THING. I think that it is rather well known how I have issues with jewelry. And now I understand that more...it needs to be LIGHT...as in, literally, lightweight...the feeling of not being there.


    I am the same way with restrictive clothing...so I LOVE the way a scarf looks...I think it really pulls together an outfit...but there are FEW that I can wear...and the weather plays a huge roll in it. I can deal more in the cooler weather, but even then...as soon as I am more comfortable...I want to get it away from all bunched up around my neck...it seemed such a fickle thing...and I couldn't understand what my deal was with the scarves, which technically, I really loved the look of...but now...I get it.


    Shoes, glasses, and jewelry off and change clothes (bra OFF). I want to be out of whatever I've had on for the day and into comfy pjs before I even think about making supper.


    If you take some of this info...I can see how a Curt-like response might be. Ever Type can wear every type of clothing...the key is to pick the right one for you (like everyone can wear every color...pick the right shade). The right one is one that you don't necessarily feel like you have to tear off at the end of the day...you may WANT to change out of your work clothes...but you aren't desperate to, if that makes sense. I have clothes that I can get desperate to get out of...and that's what I call a failure. I may continue to wear them for the needs for which they are purchased...but ultimately, I avoid wearing them if at all possible.


    I have desperate-to-get-out-of clothes, and they are big time fails. I also continue to wear them. Shoes are my worst fails.


    If the three of us are all Type 1s...I do find it interesting that we have all experienced the weight gain again. I have some theories on that...but I don't know if ya'll really want to talk about that.


    I want to hear these theories if you don't mind sharing, Anita.


    My weight issues have called for more purchases...it means that my dresser needs attention to be reorganized...I'm going to be working on my wardrobe again...this time, with an eye to what I have learned about the energy profiling and how that has translated into what I really wear from what I own. I'm hoping to clear out (at least temporarily) what doesn't fit and what I don't wear (especially if I can understand WHY I don't wear it...if it fits), and get myself organized again.


    The holidays are coming and there will be many opportunities to not wear active wear. I need to know that I am prepared and happy with my clothes choices for those occasions.


    Let's talk more about this, ok!?! (As IF I didn't write a book here?!?)

  3. Post earrings on a business card is a handy tip I've used.


    If I have the space, I've put each night's clothes over a cheap thin metal hanger and poking a hole near the top of the bag, attach a zip-lock for each night's jewelry. Chunky necklaces work best for this. Added benefit--open suitcase, put each hanger in closet and voila! Unpacked!

  4. My "style" is all over the place. Circumstances haven't helped the situation, weight changes and moving have necessitated making some purchases, even if I didn't want to. I still make horrible purchases about 80% of the time. And by horrible, I mean that I buy stuff and wear it a couple of times and then it collects dust. I would LOVE to be wearing clothes that accurately reflect me. Despite all my efforts, I still can't seem to make what the world sees represent the way I feel inside. And it's very frustrating to feel like I waste money.


    Anita, I cropped out part of your comment and left the part that REALLY resonates with me. This is exactly how I feel much of the time. My weight changes are mostly up, so I'm hanging on to dresses that I loved when I bought them and wore a few times, but they sadly can't be worn now. I'm not a shopaholic (I don't think) but I have enormous amounts of storage space since the kids have all left home and we have resided in our home exactly 30 years this month. That's lots of time to fill closets and not feel the pressure to cull or cultivate a more streamlined wardrobe. I really like most of what I have, but there are items that need an alteration or two. I buy clearance or cheap much of the time and really like it when I first buy whatever it is, but after a few wears, I realize it wasn't the best choice for one reason or the other.


    I'm trying really hard these days to not beat myself up when that $15-20 top isn't the workhorse I expected it to be, because sometimes, I CAN find a flattering-for-me top in the right color that accurately reflects me. I hate to waste money and feel like I made a poor choice regardless if it is $20 Walmart top or a $120 Boden cashmere T. It really irritates me to know I have a pile of clothes that need alterations sitting on my sewing machine. I'm capable, but choose to watch a Hallmark movie with DH instead of my to-do list in the evenings. I keep telling myself that when I retire, I'll catch up my to-do list, purge my closets, begin exercising, eat healthier, (insert good project of choice).


    I didn't intend to jump back on the FIRE thread and be Debbie Downer, but these things have been on my mind recently and I agree whole-heartedly with much of what you say, Anita. I'm not sure if it is the Type 1 personality, but...maybe?

  5. Wow, Ladies! It's been months and months since I've checked in here.


    Pam, I'm sorry that you felt all alone after posting. If I'd been checking in regularly, I'd have said something. I've felt that all-alone feeling after posting. It can weird you out. I'm sorry that you had a fashion slump, but I've felt that too and am glad to say that I think I'm working my way back out of that valley.


    I took a quick look at the EARTH thread to see what you meant by Anita's post. Dressing Your Truth is an interesting concept and I partial agree, but, like you, I don't agree 100%. I think color and image archetype work best for me. I heard an interesting concept recently that takes it one more step further for me. I'll try to explain it here.


    For me, I know that I'm a Light Spring colored person dressing Yang Classic style.


    Color catagories: True Winter, Bright Winter, Bright Spring, True Spring, Light Spring, Light Summer, True Summer, Soft Summer, Soft Autumn, True Autumn, Dark Autumn, Dark Winter.


    Style categories according to height: Gamine, Soft Gamine, Flamboyant Gamine, Romantic, Soft Classic, Theatrical Romantic, Soft Natural, Dramatic Classic, Dramatic, Flamboyant Natural


    Same style categories by different names: Yin Gamine, Yang Gamine, Yin Romantic, Yang Romantic, Yin Classic, Yang Classic, Yin Natural, Yang Natural, Yin Dramatic and Yang Dramatic.


    The third classification breakdown that I heard recently must have a name, but I didn't hear it if it was stated, but it goes something like this:


    1)Self-preservation--Dresses for self or comfort. Loose T shirt, denim jeans and white trainers are most usually a self-preservation type dresser. Not everyone in this category dresses in that uniform, but items equally as comfortable to them. I WAS this before trying to up my game and joining CJW's FIRE train.


    2)Conformist--Dresses to fit in and conform to idea of whatever "everyone else" is wearing. Trendy dresser who wants to wear latest styles. Changes often.


    3)Sexual or 1:1--Dresses to attract, whether to stand out and be noticed, or to attract that certain someone 1:1.


    I'm not sure that I explained that very well, but when I watched the FaceBook Live event, it added another dimension to my understanding, much like Pam's Dressing Your Truth did for her.


    It's been an ongoing adventure for me. My daughter knows this stuff instinctively. She gets that from her father. I'm trying. I'll continue to try.

  6. Ahhh, Kim. Such a grand adventure you had! Thanks for sharing. I can tell that Jerry has been practicing his smile for the camera. Great job, Jerry!


    Our next trip is a return to the TN/NC area in October. I doubt that we'll travel anywhere new and interesting, but if we do, I'll try to take a few pictures to share.


    The EARTH ladies have been chatting and sharing gorgeous fashionable items, but I've had nothing new to add to the conversation because I've been trying to shop my closet and wear out a few old things before purchasing new things. My plan was working very well, until I received that 80% off email from Sierra Trading and spent today's morning free time filling up my shopping cart. I'll try to remember to post the winners and losers after my order arrives.


    All in one 24-hour period of time last week, I managed to trash one top, one pair of white jean shorts and one pair of huaraches. I replaced the shoes because they are a summer staple for me. The shorts won't be replaced because I purchased a pair of white stretch jean capris at the beginning of spring this year and I like them better. They are a longer capri-length that can be cuffed up to just below my knee if I want. The top developed tiny pin-holes in several places. It wasn't a terribly expensive knit top, but it hadn't been worn nearly enough times to expect it to disintegrate while I was wearing it. I despise the new tissue weight material manufacturers are using. If it doesn't ball up and need a shave job, it disintegrates before my very eyes. I refuse to play this game and will purchase only merino, cashmere, silk and linen tops in the future. I'm expecting my wardrobe to become very minimalist-looking. From what I've been seeing online in the styles that I like, I won't be able to afford to buy anything unless it is on super sale.


    What's everyone else up to this summer?

  7. Lands sakes alive, Ladies, I'd never go down the road putting on makeup! Sandwiched between my legal secretarial careers, work-life while my kids were growing up (18 yrs.) was rural mail carrier where delivering mail and multi-tasking while driving was the name of that game. However, I don't text while driving and consider myself an attentive driver. Putting on makeup while sitting at a stoplight is a total different animal in my book. In fact, it's a game for me. I try to see if I can do my complete face during one light. If I don't finish before the light turns green and traffic starts moving again, I can always put it on in the office parking lot.


    Anita, I've been known to wait to put on my makeup until I leave the office to meet DH for lunch, so I don't consider makeup a daily must either. I do wear it almost daily because it helps with the dry/oily places of my skin. One of the greatest things about finally feeling confident about my color choices was when the dark eye circles just naturally disappeared and I could feel better in my own skin. Just. My. Skin. The natural colors that appear in my skin, hair and eyes are repeated and enhanced with the little bit of makeup that I use. When I use it.


    As always, YMMV, Ladies.

  8. I agree with Melody about Ulta and BareMinerals used to be my favorite brand until my face started to look a little drier recently. I have several pots of never opened BareMinerals waiting for me to use and I hate to think that cost will be wasted, but I started to use different products a year or two ago and I thought the back-story might be interesting or beneficial to someone here.


    I'm in the same boat as Kim. They've discontinued my favorite color recently and I'll be needing to locate another source for my FIRE colors.


    This is going to sound strange and I'm sharing too much maybe (when has that ever stopped me here before?) but I switched from powder blush a few years ago to a creamier texture. It's called cheap tube lipstick--specifically NYC brand. When I realized that it was taking entirely too much time to apply my mineral makeup because it was beginning to look a little chalky on my skin, I explored other options and tried a chubby stick. If it is good for cheeks, lids, and lips, why wouldn't the right shade of lipstick work as well? Some brands are dirt cheap.


    I have been using NYC Coralista for my lips and cheeks. It is a darker coral color; almost a coral red. NYC Peach Fizz is a lighter color with shimmer that I use on my eyes. I use either color separately or layered together on my lips. I have one more tube of each color and will need to look for a different option. With daily use, I expect to be looking for something around the first of the year. Maybe by January, they will reintroduce lipstick in our FIRE colors. What is it about makeup that they can’t leave well enough alone? Like everyone alive would rather wear brown lipstick than put a little color on their face? I don’t need to get started ranting, but it would be so easy to do about makeup.


    I use whatever cheap mascara I can find in a brown/black color because my eyelashes are naturally that exact shade. The only other item I use is NYC City Proof 24 Hr. Eye Shadow stick in Tribeca Taupe. I use it as an eyeliner because I never could master the smudgy line. A little of the stick on my lashline gives me exactly what I like. Who knows, they may have discontinued this color also, because I haven’t looked recently. I have one stick in my purse and one for my makeup clutch at home.


    To say I have a 5 minute makeup routine is an overstatement. Most days it takes me longer to find the items in the bottom of my purse than it does to apply. Two stoplights and I’m looking as good as it’s going to get for the day.

  9. Lauri, I'm so glad you listened to your gut and thanks for coming back to let us know. I've wondered about you. I had my total hysterectomy at 36 and it was the right decision for me. I would have never thought I needed to be grateful to be fibrocystic. Thanks for that new outlook. I have a friend whose reconstruction sounds similar to yours. I envy her ability to wear whatever she wishes with no thought of underpinnings to keep everything pointed in the right direction. Best wishes for the rest of your journey.


    Melody, what a trip you had. It doesn't sound like the way I would prefer to see Hawaii, but I bet it wasn't what you signed on for either. Glad everything is better now. Thanks for posting the pictures.


    Laurie, huge--schmooge. I have those same feelings about my arms, but I'm trying to learn to accept myself--even the parts I'm not happiest with and my arms definitely fall into that category. My arms help me get out of bed in the morning, brush my teeth and get me where I need to be every day. Without them, I'd be handicapped for the life I'm glad to lead. I don't mean to come down hard on you, and you may have meant this much more lightheartedly than I read it, so I guess I'm saying all this mostly for my own benefit. Sorry, if I seem rude or harsh, but I'm trying so hard to accept what I need to change until the change actually happens and you've made such great strides to being healthier. I am envious and I think you should be proud of your accomplishment. Rant over. I keep thinking--what will be worse, big arms or flapping skin? At my age, I'm afraid that's my only two options. The thought that my extra arm skin will magically disappear is probably a fairy-tale. LOL


    Well, Anita. Lands sake, woman! You do have an enormous amount of upheaval going on. I guess I can quit holding out hope that my dream of a fall cruise for the FIRE/EARTH ladies will materialize. I will continue to send prayers and positive thoughts for you and your family.


    Margaret, take good care of our Anita. Dang it, but I wish I could sit in on those get-togethers. There's no telling how much good info I could absorb. IF I could sit still and keep my mouth shut long enough!

  10. Back in the 90s when DD outgrew her black combat boots, I decided I could wear them. I did. Wore them out in public with a three-tiered maxi broomstick skirt. DH had a fit. Said I looked ridiculous. I still remember that outfit. I thought it looked great. I still do. He's a very traditional dresser.


    Sorry, Pam, but I agree with Anita. I think gladiator sandals are great looking on everyone. I couldn't take them on a cruise because my feet swell so much. I would wear very short wedge sandals with minimal straps though--my summer go-to shoe.

  11. Does anyone else have a husband like mine? He's picky. Very picky. I can get him certain things, but he really needs to choose his own clothes. He's fussy about style, color and fit. It can take a great deal of work to convince him that something looks good if it isn't one of his usual choices. Boy, he is tough to shop for!


    And I can't pick his vacation clothes either. He lets me get out his socks, but that is about it.


    Laurie, I have a husband like yours! He shops more than I do and is pickier than I am. When we first married, I remember going into the bedroom to lay out church clothes for him on the bed. My mother had done this for my father my entire life, so I knew what a good wife should do, right? WRONG! He came into the room and asked what I was doing. When I told him, he let me know in no uncertain terms that he was a grown man that didn't need help choosing his clothes. We had a great laugh but I've never forgotten that day. I've also never shopped for him. He definitely has his own ideas.


    Pam, it sounds like your packing personality is packing quite a punch. Is everything still under your weight and size limits?

  12. Oh, Sally! I'm so sorry that you felt weak enough that you needed to cancel your cruise. That's disappointing. I hope you regain your strength soon. Take care.


    Melody, hope you have a great time. I'd love to hear all about it when you return. Please?


    Margaret, I have been offline and really enjoyed catching up. Hearing about your cruise helped me realize that living vicariously through your pictodiary is the only way I'll ever travel by smaller ship. You looked happy, relaxed and lovely in your EARTHy colors.


    Laurie, It's so much fun to plan and June will be here before you know it. I hope your daughter's surgery goes well and she's feeling better soon.

  13. Could you imagine what a MeetNGreet cruise would look like with all our FIREyness onboard! LOL That would truly be a sight!


    Pam, I was skimming through Pinterest recently looking at spring capsules. My first reaction was--these are supposed to be spring? They are all SO dark. Yep, I've settled into spring colors quite nicely, I think. Ivory and greige/mushroom/taupe/whatever you call it are now my neutrals. It took so long to find the taupe that I had begun to use coral red and many other FIRE colors as neutrals. I'll still wear those items, but it's nice to know that I have an available neutral when everyone else is wearing black or gray.


    I AM staying tuned, Pam. I'm puzzled how your packing personality is performing. I've always liked the mix and match of it all. For my 16th Christmas present, Mother and I spent the first of many happy shopping trips together composing a winter wardrobe. A simple button-up blouse, two argyle sweater vests, two wool circular skirts and a pair of slacks. Mother and I usually shopped for patterns, material and notions because she sewed my clothes, so these store-bought clothes and the fun we had shopping were extra special. I still remember the colors and patterns. It is a happy, happy memory.


    The following year, our high school choir traveled to Europe. Mother and I made and bought my red/white/blue wardrobe. Everything in my gynormous suitcase mixed and matched and I was hooked on the idea. Mix and match fell by the wayside when I outgrew the clothes until I started traveling and discovered the packing light phenomenon. Sad to say it, but it has become a hobby for me. Is my weirdness showing too much?

  14. Ahh, sorry, Melody. It seems I misread the previous post. The FIRE comes out my mouth sometimes as well as showing in my wardrobe. LOL


    Alan like my colors too. He had been telling me for years that dark colors weren't my best look. He's much more observant than I'd ever hope to be. I'm too busy doing while he's ever watching.

  15. Depending on size, jewelry for each day's outfit goes in either a sandwich-sized or quart-sized ziploc bag. Each bag can be attached to the outfit's hanger when hung in the closet.


    Punch a hole and attach several post-type earring sets on a single business card to keep them organized. All jewelry travels in my evening clutch. My makeup travels in another evening clutch. Even my suitcase organizers do double duty when possible. --Debbie

  16. Ok, Pam. Take a look at The Vivienne Files for March 17th. I hope I've given you the correct link below. Insert your own items (especially the shoes!) and see if this won't work for you. If you have more room in your suitcase, you can add like I said before: 1 top, 1 bottom, 1 topper in that order. If you only have room for 1 top, that still will add many extra outfits. If you can add only 1 top and 1 more bottom--Wow, will it give you many more options. I can't remember off the top of my head, but it leaps by a LOT each time you add one piece to the mix.


    I don't always like the colors or the styles, but always the ideas of how to make it work. This shows the different options each time you add another item. THIS capsule is one I would use in a heartbeat. I'd change the button-up cardigans to boyfriend v-neck cardigans and add a tank in all four colors. I could see you adding camis and using your active wear instead of the LLBean and LandsEnd type items.


    http://www.theviviennefiles.com/2016/03/accessories-lime-coral-beige-and-cream.html This is the adding accessories post. On the first line of her written copy, she links to the original post where she actually forms the wardrobe. SORRY! Here it is:



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