What are they thinking, drinking, smoking?

[printingchick]

[LIST]
[*]Absolutely agree...I would RACE to buy the book!! Awesome idea!
[*]Flying out of Knoxville, Tennessee to Hartford, Connecticut a few years ago, we found people in our seats. The flight attendant assumed the flight over-booked and told us to take any available seats. (We were a family of 5.) Naturally, people eventually boarded who had tickets for the seats we'd taken, causing more confusion. An announcement was made, offering $$ for volunteers to take a later flight. As they sweetened the offer, my husband and two of our kids got off the plane, taking the deal. (They only needed 3 volunteers.) My youngest and I continued on to Connecticut on the original flight. As we began to taxi to the runway, the people who had been sitting in our ticketed seats stood up in a panic, having realized they were on the WRONG PLANE! The airline lost the $$ they paid to our family to give up some of our seats, my youngest son and I had to wait for HOURS in Hartford for the other family members to arrive...all the while lugging around suitcases for a family of FIVE...and the plane flew with three empty seats - all because these people were on the wrong plane! No one checked. They just ASSUMED they'd double sold the seats!!
[*]In all areas of life, I'm constantly amazed at how miserable people can make themselves by seeing every bump in the road as dramatically devastating. But on a cruise ship, where life is just this side of PARADISE, it's even more mind-boggling!
[/LIST]

[ducklite]

[quote name='Fredr']
And...surveys are really a complete waste of time and resources. Surveys were created when a group of business schools professors had nothing better to do, that is, nothing positive or informative to tell their students. You can't eliminate bias is one problem, such as "that dark little man had an accent" or my grandmother's quiche was better than the ship's.[/QUOTE]

Actually I think surveys can be very helpful in process improvements IF they are followed up on.

Last week I had a satisfactory but not great stay at a hotel in the mid-west. I filled out the survey they sent after I checked out. My responses were based on objective as opposed to subjective observations.

There was mold in the shower; I didn't receive turn down service one night; a light over the sink in the bathroom was burned out and never replaced (that shouldn't be my job to call about, that's what a housekeeper gets paid to notice in a four star hotel); my bath towels weren't replenished (fortunately I started with four and only use one a day); there was a ton of dust and paper scraps under my bed (I dropped something and it rolled under and I knelt down to pick it up, lifted the bed skirt and ewww...); I can't even remember what else, but it wasn't "I didn't like the color of the carpet" kind of feedback.

Yesterday I received an email from the head of housekeeping asking me to provide more information as to why I gave the responses that I did. I wrote back and provided similar info to what I stated above. Hopefully this will help them resolve what are obvious gaps in their housekeeping service levels so that next time they will get great comments.

[johneeo]

[quote name='ducklite']Actually I think surveys can be very helpful in process improvements IF they are followed up on.

[/quote]

I checked into an Atlantic City casino for a convention.

The previous person in my room filled out the survey, and it was still in the room when I checked in.

A Mr. Gotrocks provided a scathing review. The limo that the casino had arranged to pick him up in was not satisfactory, when he got to the casino, he had to wait to get his room, service and food were horrible, and on and on and on.

I get home, and the next week a letter from the President of the casino arrives, addressed to me. ..... something to the effect .... "Dear Mr. Johneeo, I want to personally apologize for the dissatisfaction you experienced at your stay at xxxx Casino etc etc ..... the next time you come, here is my personal assistants name and number, please contact him to let him know of your arrival."

Well, the next year comes around, same convention. I call Mr. Personal Assistant to the President to inform him of my arrival.

Penthouse suite, jacuzi, bar (all liquor free of course) monster bed shaped like a heart.

[pmacher61]

[quote name='BruceMuzz']
Next time you have a complaint on a ship, and the ship staff seem a bit skeptical, remember these stories.[/quote]
Why?
Like many others I respect and usually enjoy Bruce's insights into the world of cruising, but this time I have to disagree. In the ordinary course of dealing with customer complaints a ship manager that is unduly influenced by the extreme cases of customer unreasonableness is, himself, acting poorly. There is absolutely no need for manifest skepticism when first entertaining complaints simply because kooks (and others) exist on the margins. Write a book about the marginal cases (including the elderly with clinical senility, a condition that you and I may suffer from at some future time), it may be entertaining, but don't expect me to accept an unreasonalble management position because you have to deal with the extreme cases. It comes with the territory.

[BruceMuzz]

[quote name='pmacher61']Why?
Like many others I respect and usually enjoy Bruce's insights into the world of cruising, but this time I have to disagree. In the ordinary course of dealing with customer complaints ship management that is unduly influenced by the extreme cases of customer unreasonableness is acting poorly. There is absolutely no need for manifest skepticism when first entertaining complaints simply because kooks (and others) exist on the margins. Write a book about the marginal cases (including the elderly with clinical senility, a condition that you and I may suffer from at some future time), it may be entertaining, but don't expect me to accept an unreasonalble management position because you have to deal with the extreme cases. It comes with the territory.[/QUOTE]

When talking about extreme cases, you are absolutely spot on.
A few lunatics should not color the opinions of the rest of us.

Unfortunately these were not extreme cases, but rather commonplace.

Every day on my ship we get more than 50 telephone calls to the front desk, complaining that the stateroom television is not working. We used to get very excited about these calls, sending electricians rushing to fix the problem.
In nearly every case, the passenger had neglected to turn the television on.
Now when we get these calls, we try to ask - without making the passenger look stupid - "Have you pushed the power button?"

Same story with hot and cold water. Every week we receive over 100 calls to tell us that the water in the shower / sink is only hot / only cold.
We used to send the plumbers to fix it immediately.
In most cases they found that the passenger had turned on only the hot or cold water tap.
The plumbers had to demonstrate how turning on both taps allowed the user to actually adjust the temperature of the water.
Now when we get those calls, we ask politely if they know that they can use both taps to adjust the temperature.

This is not to say that most people are stupid. They are not.
But many people, when they find themselves in surroundings that are not familiar, tend to do and say stupid things.
There are many very legitimate complaints and issues that cruise passengers have.
But sadly, there are so many really goofy things going on - and wasting our time instead of helping people who have legitimate problems - that we are reluctant to get too worked up when we first hear a new story. Checking it out first can save a great deal of wasted time later.

Remember all those corny Cruise Director jokes about passengers asking if elevators go up AND down (and forward and aft), which altitude we are cruising at in Alaska, if the crew sleeps on the ship, if we make our own electrical power, etc?
The cruise directors do not need to invent those questions. We hear them repeated every day.
Do you recall how hard you laugh when the cruise director tells those corny stories?
We do the same thing. But since this happens so often every day, we tend to be not entirely trusting when we hear the next comment/complaint from you.
Ronald Reagan had great advice: "Trust but verify".
This is part of what makes working on a cruise ship so fascinating and so much fun.

Recently we were in heavy seas for several days. We had a suite passenger who insisted that a woman was trapped inside the wall next to his cabin. All night long she was pounding on the wall - just above his bed - begging to be rescued from her confinement. He telephoned me several times every day and night, insisting that I visit his cabin to hear the poor woman (and save her life). I eventually gave up trying to explain that it was simply the noise of the ship flexing in the heavy seas. He refused to believe me.
When the heavy seas subsided, the woman stopped pounding on his wall. He was convinced that I was lying about rescuing her, but was happy to know she was alive.

Recently I wasted a week trying to reason with a passenger who had a sewage smell problem in his cabin. A reasonable complaint, you might think.
He was very upset and his cruise was ruined.
The smell would appear just after he used the toilet, then disappear right after he flushed the toilet.
My staff and I spent 7 days explaining how that works, but he didn't want to hear it.
He wanted the problem fixed ASAP - and he wanted a full refund for the cruise.
Sadly he got neither one.

Yesterday a New York City policeman who is sailing with us came to report a crime onboard. He insisted that his neighbor in the cabin above him is binding his wife and beating her all night every night. With his police training, this man is quite sure that he knows what is going on in there. I called Security and we checked it out. His upstairs neighbors are in their 90's and confined to wheelchairs. They can barely move. I checked on all his other neighbors. Most of them are quite elderly also. Not one of them has heard the screams or beatings he has reported. None has any bruises or complaints.
Is this man crazy or stupid? Or just on vacation? You be the judge.
This is another great story for my book.
I cannot wait to hear what they tell me tomorrow.......................

[Steppy08]

OMG, Bruce.... You really do need to write a book.

People not involved daily in the travel industry just don't get the truly bizarre/ridiculous things that happen every day.

I bet $100 that in the next few posts someone is going to say how there really WAS a lady pounding on a wall because she was stuck or there really WAS sewage smell every time they used the toilet on one of their cruises and we shouldn't judge them.

[TracieABD]

wow... People amaze me...

Thanks for the share!:)

[pmacher61]

[quote name='BruceMuzz']When talking about extreme cases, you are absolutely spot on.
A few lunatics should not color the opinions of the rest of us.
Unfortunately these were not extreme cases, but rather commonplace.[/quote]
Your reply shows a great deal more reflection (and wisdom) than the original post did. I guess my next question to you would be: If these seemingly absurd complaints are so commonplace, are you satisfied that you have taken all reasonable measures to minimze their reoccurence? For example, would additional signage on the television and bathroom fixtures help to eliminate some of the complaints and save unnecessary crew/staff involvment? Would mention of these matters in the intro doc playing on the TV aimed at orienting new pax help to minimize them? Design changes for future builds?

[quote name='BruceMuzz']But sadly, there are so many really goofy things going on - and wasting our time instead of helping people who have legitimate problems - that we are reluctant to get too worked up when we first hear a new story. Checking it out first can save a great deal of wasted time later.
[/quote]
There is a difference between "checking it out first" and "not getting too worked up" on the one hand and initially manifesting "skepticism" on the other. No doubt your experience has given you the insight into how to best deal with passenger complaints and how to allocate resources to address them intelligently. I just wonder, are there other prophylactic measures you can take to head them off at the pass?

[BruceMuzz]

[quote name='pmacher61']Your reply shows a great deal more reflection (and wisdom) than the original post did. I guess my next question to you would be: If these seemingly absurd complaints are so commonplace, are you satisfied that you have taken all reasonable measures to minimze their reoccurence? For example, would additional signage on the television and bathroom fixtures help to eliminate some of the complaints and save unnecessary crew/staff involvment? Would mention of these matters in the intro doc playing on the TV aimed at orienting new pax help to minimize them? Design changes for future builds?


There is a difference between "checking it out first" and "not getting too worked up" on the one hand and initially manifesting "skepticism" on the other. No doubt your experience has given you the insight into how to best deal with passenger complaints and how to allocate resources to address them intelligently. I just wonder, are there other prophylactic measures you can take to head them off at the pass?[/QUOTE]

pmacher61,

You are asking very good and reasonable questions.
We think about and discuss these very issues every day.
How can we do this better?

On my last ship, I tasked my department heads to gather their top 100 biggest passenger challenges/complaints.
We then wrote up a how-to guide that covered those 100 top issues, hoping to assist our guests in avoiding needless drama and discomfort.
This how-to book was 60 pages. It covered everything.
We advertised this booklet in the daily program and had the cruise director promote it at the evening shows. We placed this free publication in every imaginable location around the ship. An average of 10 passengers per week picked it up. We don't know if anyone actually read it. We do know that a very small percentage of cruise passengers carry or read the daily program which is only 4 pages.

OK, most people do not read anymore.

Plan B.

My Front Desk Manager and I offered a free seminar at the beginning of each cruise. We offered first time cruisers - and anyone else with a curious mind - to sit down with us for 45 minutes in the show lounge. There we answered and explained the top 100 questions/complaints that we encounter every day at our Front Desk.
We advertised this in the daily program and made special announcements just before the meeting.
The biggest number of attendees in one month was 5 passengers - who really enjoyed it.

The next month we decided to offer free drinks to all attendees. We advertised it more heavily this time. The highest number of attendees was 12 - who really enjoyed it even more. Unfortunately, the other 3,500 passengers were too busy standing in line at the front desk to complain or telephoning the desk to complain, and couldn't attend the meeting.

At that point we gave up.

CruiseCritic has been able to attract a whopping 3% of current cruise passengers. Despite the wealth of FREE knowledge available here, it hasn't really been able to make a dent in the nonsense we see on ships.

If you have any other ideas, I would love to hear them - but that might reduce the number of crazy stories I am getting - absolutely free - from our "creative" guests.

At the end of the day, you can't fix stupid.

[pmacher61]

[quote name='BruceMuzz']If you have any other ideas, I would love to hear them - but that might reduce the number of crazy stories I am getting - absolutely free - from our "creative" guests.
At the end of the day, you can't fix stupid.[/quote]
I'm now in the process of writing the music and words to the first night theater spectacular performed by the ship's cast of singers and dancers. It's a parody of life on the sea. Scene 1 : a cabin bathroom shower.... (They say eating fish makes you smarter so I stuffed myself on the salmon offered aboard. I don't think I got smarter, but after a couple of days I had this uncontrollable urge to swim up to the shower head.)
...to be continued

[Off2China]

[quote name='bbwex']There might be another explanation. On our Alaskan cruise two years ago, we were told of a woman who had brought no warm clothing -- just shorts, bathing suits, etc. When she complained about the weather, she said that Hawaii and Alaska were right next to each other on the map -- it seems she did not realize that the two insets on the map did not realize that they were in different locations!

Yes they drive and they vote.[/QUOTE]

OMG!! I'm old enough to remember when both Alaska and Hawaii became states in 1959. I remember asking my dad: "Where are they going to put them on the map??" [B] I was [B]6 years old[/B][/B]. He tried to explain to me where both states really were. Guess I'm lucky the insets hadn't been published yet or I might have shown up for our Alaska cruise a few years ago with only shorts & flip flops. Americans are so geographically ignorant it embarrasses me. :(

[Kwaj girl]

It was embarkation day in Sydney for our Regal Princess Australia/New Zealand cruise back in 2000. We had just finished the safety drill & were headed back to our stateroom. In the hallway we overheard an 'older' female passenger declare, "This is the WORST Princess cruise I've ever been on!" DUH...we hadn't even left port yet..

[RoofingPrincess]

[quote name='printingchick']Flying out of Knoxville, Tennessee to Hartford, Connecticut a few years ago, we found people in our seats. The flight attendant assumed the flight over-booked and told us to take any available seats. (We were a family of 5.) Naturally, people eventually boarded who had tickets for the seats we'd taken, causing more confusion. An announcement was made, offering $$ for volunteers to take a later flight. As they sweetened the offer, my husband and two of our kids got off the plane, taking the deal. (They only needed 3 volunteers.) My youngest and I continued on to Connecticut on the original flight. As we began to taxi to the runway, [B][COLOR=red]the people who had been sitting in our ticketed seats stood up in a panic, having realized they were on the WRONG PLANE![/COLOR][/B] The airline lost the $$ they paid to our family to give up some of our seats, my youngest son and I had to wait for HOURS in Hartford for the other family members to arrive...all the while lugging around suitcases for a family of FIVE...and the plane flew with three empty seats - all because these people were on the wrong plane! No one checked. They just ASSUMED they'd double sold the seats!![/quote]
One of the things I love about Southwest Airlines is that their flight attendants generally manage to mention, and often in a humorous fashion, where the plane is headed - and they do it before the plane pulls away from the gate.
"This plane is going to Hartford. If Hartford is not where you're headed today, please say something NOW!"

[ducklite]

[quote name='RoofingPrincess']One of the things I love about Southwest Airlines is that their flight attendants generally manage to mention, and often in a humorous fashion, where the plane is headed - and they do it before the plane pulls away from the gate.
"This plane is going to Hartford. If Hartford is not where you're headed today, please say something NOW!"[/QUOTE]

ALL airlines do that. Unfortunately some people don't bother to get the hayseeds out of their ears long enough to listen.

[Blondilu]

Nothing is more embarrassing to me than charging up to someone and saying "something doesn't work" only to find out it's user error.

So when I have an issue I usually start with "Excuse me, I must be doing something wrong" or "please don't laugh, but am I in the right place?" I find that people are more helpful if I don't act like I know everything and then open my mouth to show the world I don't. To me it's all about being aware and thinking first, whereas a lot people seem content to walk around in their own little worlds oblivious to all except their own needs.

And don't even get me started at the geographical ignorance of many people.

[sparky-elpaso]

[quote name='Blondilu']Nothing is more embarrassing to me than charging up to someone and saying "something doesn't work" only to find out it's user error.

So when I have an issue I usually start with "Excuse me, I must be doing something wrong" or "please don't laugh, but am I in the right place?" [B][COLOR=Red]I find that people are more helpful if I don't act like I know everything and then open my mouth to show the world I don't. [/COLOR][/B] To me it's all about being aware and thinking first, whereas a lot people seem content to walk around in their own little worlds oblivious to all except their own needs.

And don't even get me started at the geographical ignorance of many people.[/quote]

Same here. When we checked in to our hotel in Sydney, AU and went to our room the lights didn't work. So when they brought up our luggage a few minutes later I asked the guy if there was a "secret" to making the lights work. Turned out there was - you had to put your key card in a slot on the wall by the door. Duh. :D I had never run into that kind of setup before.

[Dayenu]

I was sitting at the gates in San Francisco waiting for boarding to Seattle to start. An old man came up to the agent and asked, is this Seattle? The agent with a sense of humor replied: no, this is San Francisco.

The old man turned around to walk to another gate. The agent had to chase him to bring back to this gate :)

[fleckle]

[quote name='printingchick'].........As we began to taxi to the runway, the people who had been sitting in our ticketed seats stood up in a panic, having realized they were on the WRONG PLANE! [/quote] This is not uncommon at airports having A and B gates sharing a common departure lounge and a common jetway that divides at the end.
When both flights that share the jetway have departing flights scheduled closely together, the gate agents typically try to board all the passengers on one flight first before they begin boarding the other flight.

However, there will almost always be some passengers who arrive at the last minute and rush down the jetway following the crowd. So it is easy to understand how they could start to board the wrong plane.

Fortunately, most gate agents and flight attendants are very attentive in such situations and are extra cautious about checking boarding passes, as well as making multiple announcements to warn passengers.


This incident reminded me of the story in the news years ago about the passenger bound for Oakland, California who instead found himself on a flight to Auckland, New Zealand.
He thought the announcements were saying Oakland.


When flying to Cincinnati, Ohio there were often startled expressions on the faces of some passengers when the plane would land in Kentucky. Many arriving there for the first time were not aware that the Cincinnati airport was located across the river from Cincinnati in Kentucky.

A number of times I boarded a plane to find someone else sitting in my seat, but they always got up and moved after the flight attendant checked their boarding pass.

Some teenaged boys in particular, when booked in coach, will try to take empty first class seats. The flight attendants usually just say something like "Nice try, fellows" and make them move.

[Trevoli]

I can sort of understand not knowing what cruise line you’re booked on, or the ship’s name BEFORE you sail (maybe somebody else booked the cruise for you) or some years later (maybe you’ve travelled a good deal since then), but to not know the cruise line, the ship’s name, or your next port WHILE YOU’RE ON THE CRUISE is ridiculous.

I’d buy your book, Bruce. Several copies, in fact, to share with all my cruise-junky friends. I would guess that that part of your job must be enjoyable. If you don't want to write a book, how about a blog?

Several years ago, while in a hotel in Charleston, SC, I could not get the in-room hair dryer to work. I pressed the reset button, still didn’t work. I plug something else into the outlet, it works, so I think the hair dryer is faulty.

I call the front desk, they send maintenance up. HE presses the reset button, and voila, it works. I told him I tried that (apparently, I didn’t press it hard enough), and he looked at me like I was complete moron. I said, “Really! “I’m a smart, capable woman!” He just laughed and said he believed me, but the look on his face said otherwise.

Regarding the keycard operating the lights, I had a similar experience at a resort in Cabo. Your room key had to be inserted into a special slot in order for the air conditioning to work. Obviously, they don’t want you to leave lights on and/or AC cranking while you’re out and about. I get it, but I don’t want to return to a warm hotel room after being in the sun all day, so we requested two keys: one to carry, and one to keep the AC going.

[TracieABD]

BTW... The key in the slot by the door is very common in Asian hotels. We always travel with an old hotel key card to drop in the slot. Most of the time, there is a very tiny switch at the bottom of the slot that requires a bit of pressure to activate it. Any card will do.

[copnlpn2]

Bruce - thanks for your posts which are informative as well as entertaining. I always write something on my comment cards, often positive but occasionally to voice an opinion (such as telling RCCL that their desserts of late all taste like puffed up gelatin).

My question is - what type of comments catch your attention in a positive way; where you feel the comment is a great suggestion or a valid disappointment/complaint? How can we, as frequent cruisers, best state our position - positive or negative - on our comment cards?

I was sceptical for several years that the comment cards were even read, but as I was debarking on one cruise, I actually saw three men reading the cards and sorting them in different stacks. After that observation, I began making it a point to comment in very specific terms, using names, times, etc., to hopefully get my card put in the "Let's Pursue This Further" pile.

I do feel that true complaints regarding a cruise experience should be addressed by the complainant right on the ship instead of writing about it on a comment card. By the time the cards are read, it's too late to check a problem or complaint, putting the cruise line at an unfair disadvantage.

And I join those posters who would read a book written by you about your experiences! What a great book it would be to read on my next cruise!

Happy sailing!

[circuitrider]

[quote name='TracieABD']BTW... The key in the slot by the door is very common in Asian hotels. We always travel with an old hotel key card to drop in the slot. Most of the time, there is a very tiny switch at the bottom of the slot that requires a bit of pressure to activate it. Any card will do.[/quote]

And here I was thinking I had to ask for three key cards (one for each of us, and one for the lights). Don't remember ever seeing this until this year, took a while to figure out how to make the lights and a/c come on (and we REALLY had to go to the bathroom first, so we had to attempt that in semi-darkness).

[GlendaleCruiser]

[quote name='Fredr']Bruce,

Several posters have suggested that you write a book about cruises. And I agree. You write exceptionally well, so much so that I suspect there is newspaper work or at least Journalism courses in your past.

There have been times when I have not agreed with you, but your posts are always thought provoking and I look forward to reading your posts.

And...surveys are really a complete waste of time and resources. Surveys were created when a group of business schools professors had nothing better to do, that is, nothing positive or informative to tell their students. You can't eliminate bias is one problem, such as "that dark little man had an accent" or my grandmother's quiche was better than the ship's.

My suggestion is...ask passengers to voluntairly put in writing any real problems that they have, instead of using a mass survey. I have been on 33 cruises and really do not like the idea of sitting in judgement of people. Especially when with one or two exceptions, cruise staff have been hard working professionals whom I came to see as friends rather than as temporary servants.[/quote]

The problem with this is that they cannot quantify the data. They want to be able to point to data to know what to address. It's like Six Sigma. If your only tool is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.

[quote name='McDebbie']This was way way before 9/11 but my aunt once got on the wrong plane. The name of the city was the same but it was the wrong state. Not sure how the gate agent didn't catch that. At least she didn't complain, she just burst into hysterics! The airline did get her to the correct city free though.[/quote]

The airline tried to send me to Charleston, West Virginia once and I had to keep insisting I was going to Charleston, South Carolina. Even when they read it back to be the second time they had me routed wrong. Finally got there.:)

[GlendaleCruiser]

[quote name='TracieABD']BTW... The key in the slot by the door is very common in Asian hotels. We always travel with an old hotel key card to drop in the slot. Most of the time, there is a very tiny switch at the bottom of the slot that requires a bit of pressure to activate it. Any card will do.[/quote]


That works on the ship, too. You can use a card that comes in the mail to entice you to buy their plan but isn't really a credit card. I don't use them (but my friend does). I don't like to leave lights on when I'm gone and the AC works without them.

In Venice, we had an actual KEY on a ring with the actual keys to the hotel door. That key operated the AC and we told them that we needed two keys so we could leave the AC on. It was unbearable without doing so.

[GlendaleCruiser]

Well, I am cruising in 7 days so I cannot wait to come back and tell you all what I heard. I actually like to keep my ears open at the Guest Services desk because they all come there eventually with their craziness. I thought a guy was going to chase a woman down when she went to the Platinum line on a Carnival ship. He tried to tell her to go to the end of the line and several of us were telling him that she had earned her place at the Platinum line and he could, too, if he cruised enough.