Ultimate Cruise Snob Stories

[PunkiC]

A few years back we were on a Caribbean cruise on the Ruby out of New York City where we live and the second night when we went to dinner we were placed with three other couples, the three men were all hot shot wall street brokers and they were bragging about the deals and tricks they do giving me hot stock tips, telling what to watch for in a few weeks, basicaly breaking the law and bragging about it, after the main course was done one of them asked me what I do for a living. I just could not resist the temptation, I replied that I was an Investigator for the Securities and Exchange Commision, well you should have seen their faces, they jumped up said hey look at the time we got to go, but you did not have dessert and coffee I said, by the way I didnt catch your names. The waiter came over looked at them almost running out of the dinning room turned to me and asked what happend, I told him that they said they had a show to catch. My wife looked at me and said, really the SEC, really. I would wave to them every time I saw them on and off the ship. I'm a Carpenter and my wife is a Teacher, no SEC.

 

I have never been tempted to lie about what I do and have been shocked to read some of the previous posts where people were bragging about their outrageous lies, but, I must admit that this story is priceless. :) Had I been in your circumstances, and quick enough to think of it, I would have been sorely tempted to say the exact same thing. ;)

 

Good job!

[Cameraman]

This has been a fun read. I don't know if my story can compare but I'll try. One loyal Cruise Critic fan made everyone nametags with the official Cruise Critic logo. They were very professional and helped us to keep track of everyone at the Meet and Greet. I left the party and forgot to take off my nametag. As I was walking through a lobby area I was stopped by a lady who commented loudly "I wish I got paid to sail on this ship and all I had to do was write about it." She then proceeded to tell me what to write in my review. I stopped her and tried to explain who I was but she was angry with me for not allowing her to finish telling me (and everyone else within range) what was wrong with this cruise. It was only the first morning. I wondered how she could have found so much wrong in less than 24 hours. By the way I wish I could get paid to cruise.

[PunkiC]

This has been a fun read. I don't know if my story can compare but I'll try. One loyal Cruise Critic fan made everyone nametags with the official Cruise Critic logo. They were very professional and helped us to keep track of everyone at the Meet and Greet. I left the party and forgot to take off my nametag. As I was walking through a lobby area I was stopped by a lady who commented loudly "I wish I got paid to sail on this ship and all I had to do was write about it." She then proceeded to tell me what to write in my review. I stopped her and tried to explain who I was but she was angry with me for not allowing her to finish telling me (and everyone else within range) what was wrong with this cruise. It was only the first morning. I wondered how she could have found so much wrong in less than 24 hours. By the way I wish I could get paid to cruise.

 

Your story made me smile. Sounds like that lady was was more generally unhappy than snobbish. I sure hope the cruise got better for her.

[remydiva]

This has been a fun read. I don't know if my story can compare but I'll try. One loyal Cruise Critic fan made everyone nametags with the official Cruise Critic logo. They were very professional and helped us to keep track of everyone at the Meet and Greet. I left the party and forgot to take off my nametag. As I was walking through a lobby area I was stopped by a lady who commented loudly "I wish I got paid to sail on this ship and all I had to do was write about it." She then proceeded to tell me what to write in my review. I stopped her and tried to explain who I was but she was angry with me for not allowing her to finish telling me (and everyone else within range) what was wrong with this cruise. It was only the first morning. I wondered how she could have found so much wrong in less than 24 hours. By the way I wish I could get paid to cruise.

 

We actually met a real 'cruise critic' on our recent danube river cruise.

 

We had wondered why a young man always seemed to be alone. He was also alone and sat next to me at our fancy schmancy classical musical concert in Vienna. On the last morning we were chit chatting with him and he offered that he indeed was paid to cruise and then write about it.

 

He was married with children so it wasn't all a rosy picture in that he did have to travel alone.. We asked if he had been 'outed' ie. had the staff figured it out and he didn't think so but he figured it was a dead give away to the staff since he was alone. He said he had to try and squeeze in as many as the shore excursions as he could so that he could write about them and it was tough as he was tired!

 

Nice guy, nice job but it would be hard to be away from family and to travel alone and not really be able to tell anyone. And no, I didn't offer any of my opinions to him!

[wonderpig]

I hope no one finds out that I heal computers - the nice dinner conversation would get hijacked into a tech support session (and pure boredom for everyone but me and my newfound 'client')... It happens all the time and I can't stop myself from helping! :o

 

I guess I also need a clever euphemism for what I do, like the school principal, architect and other "Incognito Professionals" use.

 

Rick

 

I do (are you ready for this?) body removals for funeral homes, the coroner's office, etc, but when asked, at first I tell people I'm sort of a courier, then when pressed, I tell people I pick up and deliver special packages. Eventually, some people catch on.....

[Wehwalt]

I love this story :)

 

It helps me to remember that it's not what you take away from an encounter that matters, but what you bring to it.

 

That being said, I have had my share of snob encounters, rude people and attitude from fellow cruisers and have responded in inappropriate manner at times :( But I will try harder to remember that I am not perfect and perhaps my kindness and tolerance will "play it forward" in some way to all of those imperfect people that I meet while having a wonderful cruise :)

 

I have to agree. I've had incidents where people have been annoying to me, and ones where I've probably been the same to others (not intentionally, of course). It is very difficult to be sunny and happy for 28 consecutive days in fairly close quarters. At some point, everyone's a bit off their game.

[GrinTo]

This is more a humorous story thread than a snob thread. Very fun to read! And it's giving me way too many ideas ;-)

[blueboro]

This is not really a snob story...just a rude person. My sis-in-law was in the photo gallery last week on the CB and was looking at photos. A man and two women arrived and she was kind of boxed in. She politely said "excuse me" so they would move and let her out and the jerk said..."you got in so you should be able to find a way out". And he refused to move. She finally elbowed her way out. I told her a nice kick to the "pills" would have solved the problem.

[poolreader]

One cruise we were seated with a three other couples. Two of them spent the time trying to impress us with their wealth, jobs, houses, cars etc. We were honest and said we live in a retirement community in a single wide, but that is how we can afford to travel. the final couple were obviously from Texas but said he worked on a ranch. The two other couples treated us and the couple from Texas like they were doing chairity to eat with us. My husband was career Air Force and I was a teacher. We passed all of these people as walked around the ship that week but the couple from Texas were the only ones who were always very friendly and would stop to talk to us. On the last night the impressive couples exchanged info but ignore the other four of us. the couple from Texas gave us their info and said if we went to Texas please call them and come stay with them on the ranch. I asked if it would be ok with their employer and they laughed. It turns out they owned one of the biggest ranches in their part of Texas. When the other couples heard this they offered their info, the ranchers said, NO, thank you. Later we saw them and the four of us had a good laugh. It turns out they like sailing incognito and finding people like us who enjoy them for who they are and not what they have.

[Sunviking]

We are always astounded at the people who evidently believe that the key to getting a foreigner to understand a language (English) they don't speak is to say whatever it is they are saying louder and louder. We've encountered these folks both on land and at sea. We've been on tours where a fellow traveler will encounter a person who speaks not a word of English. In an effort to get them to understand the person will speak louder and louder until they are shouting as if the increase in volume will miraculously create understanding. Some of these same linguists are the ones who are dumbfounded that stores in Italy, France, Germany or most other countries outside of the Caribbean area won't take dollars for payment. We had a couple on a cruise at our table in traditional dining who were offended that when they went into stores on their tours the merchants wanted Euros and wouldn't accept dollars.

[Woobstr112G]

We are always astounded at the people who evidently believe that the key to getting a foreigner to understand a language (English) they don't speak is to say whatever it is they are saying louder and louder. We've encountered these folks both on land and at sea. We've been on tours where a fellow traveler will encounter a person who speaks not a word of English. In an effort to get them to understand the person will speak louder and louder until they are shouting as if the increase in volume will miraculously create understanding. Some of these same linguists are the ones who are dumbfounded that stores in Italy, France, Germany or most other countries outside of the Caribbean area won't take dollars for payment. We had a couple on a cruise at our table in traditional dining who were offended that when they went into stores on their tours the merchants wanted Euros and wouldn't accept dollars.

 

Ann;

 

This so true. I've seen this many times as well.....:):):)

 

Bob

[CruizinTwosome]

Oh my goodness, that's a great idea!

 

Most all hot tubs actually say that children under 12 must be accompanied by an adult to enter. So really, it's a safety issue. Kids will play around in hot tubs for long periods of time, and that can have lasting effects and is actually believed to lead to infertility in boys (though most hot tubs on cruise ships aren't nearly hot enough).

 

One can only hope the little brat bragging about "elite" status sat in the hot tub long enough to become infertile! :D

[Pepes Pal]

First of all I've been reading this thread with some enjoyment but also then admittedly with some astonishment. What astounds me here more than makes me laugh is the ignorance of some travelers & their phony superior attitudes & their treatment of others. Most of these pompous travelers (who give us the moniker of "Ugly Americans") are really gravely insecure, actually feeling very inferior to others so they are asking for the attention they need: "look at me, how important am I"? It reminds me of an old saying: " Beware of those who try to blow out your candle to make their's shine brighter"!

 

One of the nicest couples I've met was just recently on a Grand TA. They never mentioned their important Government positions, their wealthy Bethesda neighborhood, no need to tell or brag about their deluxe suite accommodations nor their multiple Phd's educations. I found this out later, not from them but from an acquaintance of theirs who later divulged this. We connected, just as human beings interested in each other & the cruise - but not status nor importance. All I knew was they were from MD & involved in the insurance business. I never asked many details. I am not one to act very impressed nor inquiring. I was impressed later when I realized their humility. You can almost now figure out the rest.;)

 

Judy

[5326jan]

Ann;

 

This so true. I've seen this many times as well.....:):):)

 

Bob

 

I love it when someone speaks English to an Italian (insert any language).... slowly... with an Italian accent, like the "Americanized" Italian accent is going to make them understand English better! :rolleyes::D

[babyher]

First of all I've been reading this thread with some enjoyment but also then admittedly with some astonishment. What astounds me here more than makes me laugh is the ignorance of some travelers & their phony superior attitudes & their treatment of others. Most of these pompous travelers (who give us the moniker of "Ugly Americans") are really gravely insecure, actually feeling very inferior to others so they are asking for the attention they need: "look at me, how important am I"? It reminds me of an old saying: " Beware of those who try to blow out your candle to make their's shine brighter"!

 

One of the nicest couples I've met was just recently on a Grand TA. They never mentioned their important Government positions, their wealthy Bethesda neighborhood, no need to tell or brag about their deluxe suite accommodations nor their multiple Phd's educations. I found this out later, not from them but from an acquaintance of theirs who later divulged this. We connected, just as human beings interested in each other & the cruise - but not status nor importance. All I knew was they were from MD & involved in the insurance business. I never asked many details. I am not one to act very impressed nor inquiring. I was impressed later when I realized their humility. You can almost now figure out the rest.;)

 

Judy

 

 

I remember reading story about Irving Berlin, one of the greatest composers in music history and responcible for God knows how many hit songs and plays.

 

One time after a long day of writing music for a play, he offered to take his staff to dinner. He called one of the swanky restaurants in New York and asked if they had anything available. He was told they were booked solid all night. Mr Berlin said Thank You and hung up.

 

When he went back to the staff and explained , his secretary got up and walked into another room. A few minutes later she came back and told everyone to get ready , they had 8pm reservations at the afore mentioned restaurant.

 

Everyone asked "how did you get reservations ?"

 

The secretary said "I called and said this is Irving Berlin's secretary , Mr. Berlin would like a table for 6 for tonight" :)

[Cuizer2]

Everyone asked "how did you get reservations ?"

 

The secretary said "I called and said this is Irving Berlin's secretary , Mr. Berlin would like a table for 6 for tonight" :)

 

Does that make the secretary a name dropper?

[babyher]

Does that make the secretary a name dropper?

 

 

Either that or a damn good employee. :)

[Times Prince]

One of the nicest couples I've met was just recently on a Grand TA. They never mentioned their important Government positions, their wealthy Bethesda neighborhood, no need to tell or brag about their deluxe suite accommodations nor their multiple Phd's educations. I found this out later, not from them but from an acquaintance of theirs who later divulged this. We connected, just as human beings interested in each other & the cruise - but not status nor importance. All I knew was they were from MD & involved in the insurance business. I never asked many details. I am not one to act very impressed nor inquiring. I was impressed later when I realized their humility. You can almost now figure out the rest.;)

 

Judy

Interestingly enough, we has a similar experience during our Grand Mediterranean cruise on the Grand Princess. We met some absolutely charming people who were well travelled, and typically avoided the arranged excursions for time to just meet people and experience cultures, something we've adopted for European cruises since. He "worked for the government", not offering other details, but sounding like he had a senior clerk position somewhere. Our families got to know each other pretty well during the cruise, and at the end he handed me his business card to stay in touch, which we did for over 10 years. He was a Senator in the Australian Government!

 

On the other hand my DW typically had to come up with some benign title for her work. She was psychotherapist, which if disclosed would result in either a) people shutting up completely, ;) or b) individuals starting to tell of their issues in an attempt to get free advice. :eek:

 

Same thing for me - I worked for a computer company, which always brought a storm of comments about quality, support, and "can you fix my computer?". Thank God that now all we have to say is "we're retired." :D

[AngelatHisMercy]

Reading through these posts I just can't keep my mouth shut any longer. This is NOT a snob story, it is the exact opposite, but I feel it fits here.

 

My husband and I have lived in a very rural area (insert "rednecks") for over 25 years. Our four sons were raised here and will most likely die here. They have not been brought up on the finery of eating with way too many forks and so forth but they HAVE been brought up Southern with manners, politeness, and all around great humor.

The last cruise we went on, we took our two younger boys with us, ages 17 and 16 on the Jewel of the Seas, RCI. The first night in the MDR my poor older boy looked at his dinner setting and immediately panicked. There were too many forks! He asked me "Is this in case we drop one?" The waitress happened to be coming by, and I really wish we could remember her name, she was fantastic! She leaned over and gently explained each fork and it's use to him. His response was something like "But I only ever use one for everything."

The next night in the MDR we arrived at our table to find that there were no forks at our son's place setting. He asked the waitress "Are we having soup?" Her answer was "No, you don't know how to use those forks so you can't have them." My boys roared with laughter and immediately felt calmer about the whole "formal" thing.

All week the number of forks changed, as did the order of how they were set. The last night we came in to find no les than fourteen forks at his plate, seven spoons, three knives, a butter knife, and a shrimp fork.

The wait staff in the MDR made our days and nights!

My son tells this story to everybody about the best cruise he ever took (it was the ONLY cruise he has even taken!).

To me, the humor and the insistence on making a couple of redneck boys feel at home in the MDR even on formal night is the complete opposite of snobbery.

As an English Lit teacher, I often remind my students that it was snobbery that killed so many on the Titanic, NOT the iceberg.

[caribill]

We are always astounded at the people who evidently believe that the key to getting a foreigner to understand a language (English) they don't speak is to say whatever it is they are saying louder and louder.

 

We have a friend who was in France and needed some directions. He approached a man and in the best French he could muster, he asked the man for the directions. The man responded in French and my friend went on, not really sure what the answer was.

 

Then my friend realized that the man's French was just as poor as his own and that the man was probably from England. If my friend had only asked the question in Enhlish, he would have the answer in a language he would have understood.

[CruizinTwosome]

Reading through these posts I just can't keep my mouth shut any longer. This is NOT a snob story, it is the exact opposite, but I feel it fits here.

 

My husband and I have lived in a very rural area (insert "rednecks") for over 25 years. Our four sons were raised here and will most likely die here. They have not been brought up on the finery of eating with way too many forks and so forth but they HAVE been brought up Southern with manners, politeness, and all around great humor.

The last cruise we went on, we took our two younger boys with us, ages 17 and 16 on the Jewel of the Seas, RCI. The first night in the MDR my poor older boy looked at his dinner setting and immediately panicked. There were too many forks! He asked me "Is this in case we drop one?" The waitress happened to be coming by, and I really wish we could remember her name, she was fantastic! She leaned over and gently explained each fork and it's use to him. His response was something like "But I only ever use one for everything."

The next night in the MDR we arrived at our table to find that there were no forks at our son's place setting. He asked the waitress "Are we having soup?" Her answer was "No, you don't know how to use those forks so you can't have them." My boys roared with laughter and immediately felt calmer about the whole "formal" thing.

All week the number of forks changed, as did the order of how they were set. The last night we came in to find no les than fourteen forks at his plate, seven spoons, three knives, a butter knife, and a shrimp fork.

The wait staff in the MDR made our days and nights!

My son tells this story to everybody about the best cruise he ever took (it was the ONLY cruise he has even taken!).

To me, the humor and the insistence on making a couple of redneck boys feel at home in the MDR even on formal night is the complete opposite of snobbery.

As an English Lit teacher, I often remind my students that it was snobbery that killed so many on the Titanic, NOT the iceberg.

 

 

This is a GREAT story! After reading about all these horrible people and experiences, it's great to hear such a fun story. Thank you for sharing!

[CruizinTwosome]

I guess I must be on a different wave length, but I honestly can't understand why people assume that if you are sending something back, you are automatically rude. It is possible to be extremely sweet and thoughtful and return something that isn't properly prepared.

 

I also have difficulty believing that the charming waiters we have experienced on our cruises would behave in a vengeful manner. Moreover, contaminating any passenger's food, even if they deserved it would automatically cost them their job.

 

Of course, it could happen, but I have enough faith in the decency of the cruise staff that I am not going to worry about it.

 

I totally agree! If you're kind and respectful there is no reason to believe they will treat you any differently.

[jimandtoni]

Reading through these posts I just can't keep my mouth shut any longer. This is NOT a snob story, it is the exact opposite, but I feel it fits here.

 

My husband and I have lived in a very rural area (insert "rednecks") for over 25 years. Our four sons were raised here and will most likely die here. They have not been brought up on the finery of eating with way too many forks and so forth but they HAVE been brought up Southern with manners, politeness, and all around great humor.

The last cruise we went on, we took our two younger boys with us, ages 17 and 16 on the Jewel of the Seas, RCI. The first night in the MDR my poor older boy looked at his dinner setting and immediately panicked. There were too many forks! He asked me "Is this in case we drop one?" The waitress happened to be coming by, and I really wish we could remember her name, she was fantastic! She leaned over and gently explained each fork and it's use to him. His response was something like "But I only ever use one for everything."

The next night in the MDR we arrived at our table to find that there were no forks at our son's place setting. He asked the waitress "Are we having soup?" Her answer was "No, you don't know how to use those forks so you can't have them." My boys roared with laughter and immediately felt calmer about the whole "formal" thing.

All week the number of forks changed, as did the order of how they were set. The last night we came in to find no les than fourteen forks at his plate, seven spoons, three knives, a butter knife, and a shrimp fork.

The wait staff in the MDR made our days and nights!

My son tells this story to everybody about the best cruise he ever took (it was the ONLY cruise he has even taken!).

To me, the humor and the insistence on making a couple of redneck boys feel at home in the MDR even on formal night is the complete opposite of snobbery.

As an English Lit teacher, I often remind my students that it was snobbery that killed so many on the Titanic, NOT the iceberg.

A lovely story. We too have met, by far, many more crew members and passengers who were wonderful people. I think this is true of everyone who has posted on here. I also think that is the reason we return to cruising over and over again. Thank you for sharing!

[Nebr.cruiser]

I remember reading story about Irving Berlin, one of the greatest composers in music history and responcible for God knows how many hit songs and plays.

 

One time after a long day of writing music for a play, he offered to take his staff to dinner. He called one of the swanky restaurants in New York and asked if they had anything available. He was told they were booked solid all night. Mr Berlin said Thank You and hung up.

 

When he went back to the staff and explained , his secretary got up and walked into another room. A few minutes later she came back and told everyone to get ready , they had 8pm reservations at the afore mentioned restaurant.

 

Everyone asked "how did you get reservations ?"

 

The secretary said "I called and said this is Irving Berlin's secretary , Mr. Berlin would like a table for 6 for tonight" :)

 

See, I actually think it is elitist to expect special favors because of being famous or rank. I love that Mr. Berlin did not name drop to get this for himself, but really, why should any one person be given perks over another because they are well known?

 

It's like the stories one hears of celebrities who expect/demand special attention. Being famous should not make a difference in how someone is treated. If there was a table, anyone who called in should have been able to book, not just someone famous.

[SeaTheWorldBySea]

Reading through these posts I just can't keep my mouth shut any longer. This is NOT a snob story, it is the exact opposite, but I feel it fits here.

 

My husband and I have lived in a very rural area (insert "rednecks") for over 25 years. Our four sons were raised here and will most likely die here. They have not been brought up on the finery of eating with way too many forks and so forth but they HAVE been brought up Southern with manners, politeness, and all around great humor.

The last cruise we went on, we took our two younger boys with us, ages 17 and 16 on the Jewel of the Seas, RCI. The first night in the MDR my poor older boy looked at his dinner setting and immediately panicked. There were too many forks! He asked me "Is this in case we drop one?" The waitress happened to be coming by, and I really wish we could remember her name, she was fantastic! She leaned over and gently explained each fork and it's use to him. His response was something like "But I only ever use one for everything."

The next night in the MDR we arrived at our table to find that there were no forks at our son's place setting. He asked the waitress "Are we having soup?" Her answer was "No, you don't know how to use those forks so you can't have them." My boys roared with laughter and immediately felt calmer about the whole "formal" thing.

All week the number of forks changed, as did the order of how they were set. The last night we came in to find no les than fourteen forks at his plate, seven spoons, three knives, a butter knife, and a shrimp fork.

The wait staff in the MDR made our days and nights!

My son tells this story to everybody about the best cruise he ever took (it was the ONLY cruise he has even taken!).

To me, the humor and the insistence on making a couple of redneck boys feel at home in the MDR even on formal night is the complete opposite of snobbery.

As an English Lit teacher, I often remind my students that it was snobbery that killed so many on the Titanic, NOT the iceberg.

 

Thank you for your post - reading it was a great way to start my day. I am reminded that snobbery and rudeness, not just on a ship but in life, are rare. What great memories for you and your boys - and I'll bet for the wait staff as well.