Never Again

[wizard-of-roz]

I am terribly sorry for your loss. It may not feel like it now but in time you will remember just the good things you shared and it does get better.

 

 

Lovely words!!!!

[iriemon]

Well, you certainly brought a tear to my eyes and helped me to remember the wonderful times my DH and I had together, rather than the very few sad and difficult ones.

Thank you for bringing me back to my happy place!!!!

I was a very lucky lady to have known such love!

 

Yes we have both been very lucky. I was glad to be able to bring a smile to your face, as we both know that can be very difficult at times

[wizard-of-roz]

Roz,

I am so sorry for your loss. I remember visiting with you and Morey on one of the cruises we were on with you. He was a car guy just like Joel. I hope your precious doggies are providing you with lots of comfort. Hugs to you Brenda and Horton.

 

Judy and Joel

 

Judy & Joel, thank you so much for your kind words. Yes, my Morey was a car guy. There were only us two [and the dogs] in our home and we had 4 cars. We once went to Vegas in one car and drove home in two.

I will miss Morey dearly. If you see Horton and me onboard another cruise please come over and say hello. Brenda is over 13 years old and she'll be doing the "spa" while Horty and me hit the high seas. My beautiful dogs are a great source of love and devotion.

[iceleven]

I remember once being on an elevator where, after stopping at one more floor, it had become full. The elevator stopped again and a woman in a scooter said, "Some of you have got to get off so that I can get on." No one budged. I was already being smashed up against the back of the elevator because of so many people in front of me.

 

She began to proceed toward us even though there was absolutely no room for her scooter. Being one of the first on the elevator, and in the rear, and claustrophobic in the first place, I screeched, LET ME OUT, and still yet the people didn't want to budge. I felt anger at the people in the elevator for their self-centered attitude and I felt sadness for the lady in the scooter who found it so frustrating that she had to act so aggressively.

 

I now try to be an advocate for people in wheelchairs and scooters. Like Pam stated, I hold elevator doors and even hold back people who are not aware they are overlooking a handicapped person's effort to enter the elevator. It is only but by grace that we are still fortunate to navigate with our own means.

[Cruzman]

I just received an email from Cruise Critic wanting me to share my last cruise experience. Well after a couple of martinis tonight I'll share my last commercial passenger cruise experience. My last and only large passenger ship cruise was a 15 day Hawaii cruise with Princess Cruises onboard the Golden Princess from LA, around Hawaii and return to LA. It was the first, the worst and the last commercial passenger cruise I will ever take, and I'm a licensed ship's captain, but not on a passenger ship. My wife was in a wheelchair. Even though there were a few other passengers in wheelchairs, their ships are NOT wheelchair friendly. Fourteen nights on a ship pushing a wheelchair through people who were annoyed by someone in a wheelchair was not fun. Passengers would fill up the elevators as soon as the door opened not leaving room for a wheelchair. Housekeeping filled the passageways with carts during the day so a wheelchair couldn't go through them. The housekeeping crew did do their best by moving their carts so we could make our way to our stateroom but most of the passengers acted annoyed. There were decks that were not accessible by wheelchair. It was my wife's dream vacation and to me it sucked. The worst thing is she caught a virus onboard on our way back from Hawaii, was admitted to a hospital the day we got back and died 2 weeks after we got back. Princess Cruises took care of us by saying "sorry". This happened last fall. I live in a house overlooking the bay of Green Bay. It's been 7 months now since the love of my life died. I set in her favorite chair looking out over the bay watching ships go by... looking at the water saying I need to get back out there doing what I love... but not this year... maybe next year... but never again on a passenger cruise ship. ~Cap'n Kenny~

 

Really sorry to hear about your negative experience, and most of all, the loss of your wife. Since I lost my wife 23 years ago, I can say that the grieving process is a very difficult thing, and we all process it differently. Personally, I found that time ultimately healed the pain. Pat was only 43, and when I cruise now (usually with my handicapped daughter), I always reserve one evening to have a drink and a toast to my deceased wife. Unfortunately, she never had the opportunity to go on a cruise.

[wizard-of-roz]

Really sorry to hear about your negative experience, and most of all, the loss of your wife. Since I lost my wife 23 years ago, I can say that the grieving process is a very difficult thing, and we all process it differently. Personally, I found that time ultimately healed the pain. Pat was only 43, and when I cruise now (usually with my handicapped daughter), I always reserve one evening to have a drink and a toast to my deceased wife. Unfortunately, she never had the opportunity to go on a cruise.

 

Wow! When you hear other folks lives, it certainly makes you think about your own.

[wizard-of-roz]

I remember once being on an elevator where, after stopping at one more floor, it had become full. The elevator stopped again and a woman in a scooter said, "Some of you have got to get off so that I can get on." No one budged. I was already being smashed up against the back of the elevator because of so many people in front of me.

 

She began to proceed toward us even though there was absolutely no room for her scooter. Being one of the first on the elevator, and in the rear, and claustrophobic in the first place, I screeched, LET ME OUT, and still yet the people didn't want to budge. I felt anger at the people in the elevator for their self-centered attitude and I felt sadness for the lady in the scooter who found it so frustrating that she had to act so aggressively.

 

I now try to be an advocate for people in wheelchairs and scooters. Like Pam stated, I hold elevator doors and even hold back people who are not aware they are overlooking a handicapped person's effort to enter the elevator. It is only but by grace that we are still fortunate to navigate with our own means.

 

That woman certainly tried to motivate those folks....but, not exactly in the right way!

You should see what trying to enter a semi-full elevator with a 90lb Lab feels like [his tail can wind-up in the weirdest places!]....Sometimes it's not a very pretty picture and we really try to do the stairs as much as we can or until my back says..."enough!"

Life can be very interesting when folks who don't like dogs in general are in your world and they feel as if we've invaded theirs!!!! :o

[Thrak]

I've only cruised twice - once on Sea Princess to Alaska and once to Hawaii on Star Princess. Both times my wife and I booked the cruise and then my son decided he would like to go as well. He's a disabled veteran who is a functional quadriplegic. He booked his own cruise and his own cabin but we did provide support for him during the cruise.

 

We didn't have a problem. Yes, the housekeeping carts can be a bit of a pain. We moved them if needed or, if the staff was there, they hustled to move them. Yes, there were some people who were elevator hogs but the vast majority made sure to make room for my son to get on with his wheelchair. If things were busy and crowded my wife and I would sometimes take the stairs and meet him on the deck where he was exiting the elevator.

 

Staff were amazingly helpful and accommodating from the dining staff to the stewards, to the bartenders. Everybody pretty much bent over backward to be of assistance.

 

It's sad that you had a bad experience on your cruise. It might have helped you to have a wonderful memory of cruising with your wife.

[wizard-of-roz]

Actually there are service cats. When my granddaughter was in the hospital for an extended stay after surgery, they brought a service cat by on several occasions to comfort her. It had a very calming effect on her as she lay there in pain.

 

Not to belabor this subject but actually there is no such thing as a "Service Cat" according to the ADA and DOJ [Dept. of Justice.] There is a "Therapy Cat" which doesn't have the same public rights that a Service Dog has. The cat can only be allowed to go into hospitals or institutions in which it does "therapy" work, it can't go into restaurants/stores/cruise ships, etc., etc.

The word "Service" implies that the dog mitigates something for it's handler ie. Seeing Eye Dog/Hearing Dog etc., etc.

[blazerjan]

Like (most of) the other posters... I am so very sorry for your loss...

I hope and pray in some small way.. those who have read it will be kinder to people in wheelchairs and on scooters because of it.

Edited July 3, 2013 by blazerjan

[Cruisin' Chick]

Not to belabor this subject but actually there is no such thing as a "Service Cat" according to the ADA and DOJ [Dept. of Justice.] There is a "Therapy Cat" which doesn't have the same public rights that a Service Dog has. The cat can only be allowed to go into hospitals or institutions in which it does "therapy" work, it can't go into restaurants/stores/cruise ships, etc., etc.

 

The word "Service" implies that the dog mitigates something for it's handler ie. Seeing Eye Dog/Hearing Dog etc., etc.

 

I think Northridge Hospital even calls those animals "healing" animals (maybe even "heeling" in some cases too, just to be cute).

 

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. There's been times when we've gone to the local mall or a restaurant around here and I've kept an eye open just in case I see a party with service dogs, and then see if they look like Horton or Brenda.

 

I think one regret of my hubby is that he wasn't able to gift his mother with a cruise that she can take with a friend before her terminal diagnosis. I think after that, he was concerned that she wouldn't be in the best shape (if she had gone with her best friend, who has MS, they would have needed a third friend to help them). She had even figured out that she wouldn't need to preorder Kosher meals, just go vegetarian for the whole time, if she ever went on a cruise.

[Cruisin' Chick]

I think we were on that Hawaiian cruise with RayandShiryl, and that cruise did have a huge number of those in scooters, compared to other cruises I've been on. And I remember how some of the elderly passengers we came into contact with complained about their peers being rude, and they didn't have any bad things to say about the kids (again, the ones we've talked to). But maybe they came into contact with some like my teen, who tends to hold doors open for others. I know she's not the only kid who does this for us older folk.

 

Hopefully parents are teaching their kids to wait for others to get off before trying to board an elevator, and then find the button -- if you're by the panel -- to keep the door open until everyone is onboard. It's amazing the number of people (of all ages) who storm onto an elevator before making sure no one needs to exit, and those who stand by the front and not place their hand by the "eye" or take over the panel to allow others to get on board.

[wizard-of-roz]

I think Northridge Hospital even calls those animals "healing" animals (maybe even "heeling" in some cases too' date=' just to be cute).

 

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. There's been times when we've gone to the local mall or a restaurant around here and I've kept an eye open just in case I see a party with service dogs, and then see if they look like Horton or Brenda.

 

I think one regret of my hubby is that he wasn't able to gift his mother with a cruise that she can take with a friend before her terminal diagnosis. I think after that, he was concerned that she wouldn't be in the best shape (if she had gone with her best friend, who has MS, they would have needed a third friend to help them). She had even figured out that she wouldn't need to preorder Kosher meals, just go vegetarian for the whole time, if she ever went on a cruise.[/quote']

 

Patty, thank you. We are out and about in the Valley and if you should see Horton and me please come over and say hello!

[kayelbee]

Firstly I am truly sorry for your loss and sincerely hope you life starts to bring you some joy soon.

Away from the OP personal situation my 'contribution' to this discussion is that not all 'disability' is visible. I have had M.E. since 2007 and find standing for more than a short time difficult and often am too fatigued to walk up multiple flights of steps however to look at me you will see a fit, healthy 40 something 6' female who looks like I should be running up the steps two at a time. I have been muttered to about taking the elevator and looked up and down when getting in but I am not going to explain to strangers why I am taking a ride no more than someone in a wheelchair should have to explain their condition. OK hear comes the hard to hear bit.....why should I who is suffering and therefore making my condition worse by standing let someone who is in a wheelchair and possibly stable go ahead of me in the elevator? To the outsider I am being at least impolite but I know why I am acting in the manner. I would never push ahead of people, I would wait my turn but unless there I was aware the person in the wheelchair was in distress I would not give up my position in the queue. If I feeling physically fit I will use the stairs. Secondly, if the area is congested and I am held by there being people in front of me I cannot let the person in the wheelchair through and the repeated banging of my ankles by the chair will not clear the thoroughfare in front of me so just wait for the people to move and go with us, being in a wheelchair does not mean you have a right to 'barge' people out of the way. I acknowledge that most wheelchair users are not like this but like all of society it is the few that colour our view of the majority.

[Starlaker]

Not to belabor this subject but actually there is no such thing as a "Service Cat" according to the ADA and DOJ [Dept. of Justice.] There is a "Therapy Cat" which doesn't have the same public rights that a Service Dog has. The cat can only be allowed to go into hospitals or institutions in which it does "therapy" work, it can't go into restaurants/stores/cruise ships, etc., etc.

The word "Service" implies that the dog mitigates something for it's handler ie. Seeing Eye Dog/Hearing Dog etc., etc.

 

Well, excuse me. I was responding to the poster who said that cats "had staff" and there was no way that a cat could be of service. At any rate, that "therapy cat" was of great comfort to my granddaughter.

[wizard-of-roz]

Well, excuse me. I was responding to the poster who said that cats "had staff" and there was no way that a cat could be of service. At any rate, that "therapy cat" was of great comfort to my granddaughter.

 

No need to be excused. Most people are unaware of the regulations that govern our wonderful/brilliant and hard working dogs.

I'm sure the comfort that the cat provided was perfect for your granddaughter and I hope that she is well now. :)

[Barb Nahoumi]

I just received an email from Cruise Critic wanting me to share my last cruise experience. Well after a couple of martinis tonight I'll share my last commercial passenger cruise experience. My last and only large passenger ship cruise was a 15 day Hawaii cruise with Princess Cruises onboard the Golden Princess from LA, around Hawaii and return to LA. It was the first, the worst and the last commercial passenger cruise I will ever take, and I'm a licensed ship's captain, but not on a passenger ship. My wife was in a wheelchair. Even though there were a few other passengers in wheelchairs, their ships are NOT wheelchair friendly. Fourteen nights on a ship pushing a wheelchair through people who were annoyed by someone in a wheelchair was not fun. Passengers would fill up the elevators as soon as the door opened not leaving room for a wheelchair. Housekeeping filled the passageways with carts during the day so a wheelchair couldn't go through them. The housekeeping crew did do their best by moving their carts so we could make our way to our stateroom but most of the passengers acted annoyed. There were decks that were not accessible by wheelchair. It was my wife's dream vacation and to me it sucked. The worst thing is she caught a virus onboard on our way back from Hawaii, was admitted to a hospital the day we got back and died 2 weeks after we got back. Princess Cruises took care of us by saying "sorry". This happened last fall. I live in a house overlooking the bay of Green Bay. It's been 7 months now since the love of my life died. I set in her favorite chair looking out over the bay watching ships go by... looking at the water saying I need to get back out there doing what I love... but not this year... maybe next year... but never again on a passenger cruise ship. ~Cap'n Kenny~

 

Dear Cap'n Kenny,

 

I was so saddened to read about your wife's passing, and the way that she and other wheelchair passengers were treated.

 

On my last 12 day cruise with a different cruiseline, I developed a severe "cold," which lasted for 3-4 weeks. Symptoms----99.9' fever, sore throat, sinus and urinary infection, you name it. I considered visiting the ship's doctor, but I was unsure of his licensing, and waited to see my own. To make a long story short, I was issued antibiotics, as well as over-the-counter drugs.

 

Others who cruised with me, developed similar illnesses after arriving home. It took them over 1 month to recover. Fortunately, my husband stayed well.

 

Were your wife's symptoms comparible?

 

About elevators for the wheelchair bound. Ships should reserve 1 elevator per bank for wheelchairs, scooters, baby strollers, and their attendants. This should eliminate much of the pushing and shoving by rude able-bodied folks.

 

I hope that some day you will return to cruising, and remember that your wife had her dream.

[lovey1103]

My DH is in a wheelchair. Let me just say, don't book C620 on the Coral if you want to get out of your cabin without alot of fuss. The cabin is on the end with a "jog" in the hall. Unfortunately this is where the housekeeping cart is parked most of the day/evening and to get out with a wheelchair is a fiasco.

By the way on our recent Alaskan cruise, fellow passengers could not have been more polite and made lots of room for the chair.

Edited July 5, 2013 by lovey1103

[Pam in CA]

My DH is in a wheelchair. Let me just say, don't book C620 on the Coral if you want to get out of your cabin without alot of fuss. The cabin is on the end with a "jog" in the hall. Unfortunately this is where the housekeeping cart is parked most of the day/evening and to get out with a wheelchair is a fiasco.

By the way on our recent Alaskan cruise, fellow passengers could not have been more polite and made lots of room for the chair.

Was it still there after you contacted the PSD and let them know of the problem? Did you tell your steward? Usually, they are reactive and will make sure the problem is eliminated. Shame on the Coral if they continued to park there after you notified them.

[OWFISH]

It's been over 3 years now since I took my wife on the vacation of her dreams. If if could, I'd do it again. It meant the world to her.

 

I have remarried since then. My new wife is from Upper Michigan. She's a Yooper but I love her. At 64 years old, she has never traveled anywhere her whole life. So I'm showing her the "world." By the world I mean we started traveling the United States during the winter months in a motorhome. During the summer months though we run a tour boat business on the Great Lakes. She is learning to become my 2nd mate. She hasn't learned to run the boat yet like my late wife Barbara but she's learning.

Edited January 10, 2016 by OWFISH

[Colo Cruiser]

It's been over 3 years now since I took my wife on the vacation of her dreams. If if could, I'd do it again. It meant the world to her.

 

I have remarried since then. My new wife is from Upper Michigan. She's a Yooper but I love her. At 64 years old, she has never traveled anywhere her whole life. So I'm showing her the "world." By the world I mean we started traveling the United States during the winter months in a motorhome. During the summer months though we run a tour boat business on the Great Lakes. She is learning to become my 2nd mate. She hasn't learned to run the boat yet like my late wife Barbara but she's learning.

 

 

Thanks for checking back in and everything is going well. :)

[Cruisin' Chick]

I'm glad you found your new mate. May you have many years of health and happiness together.

[RocketMan275]

It's been over 3 years now since I took my wife on the vacation of her dreams. If if could, I'd do it again. It meant the world to her.

 

I have remarried since then. My new wife is from Upper Michigan. She's a Yooper but I love her. At 64 years old, she has never traveled anywhere her whole life. So I'm showing her the "world." By the world I mean we started traveling the United States during the winter months in a motorhome. During the summer months though we run a tour boat business on the Great Lakes. She is learning to become my 2nd mate. She hasn't learned to run the boat yet like my late wife Barbara but she's learning.

 

Thanks for coming back and sharing that with us. I'm glad to hear things are better for you.

 

I do have just one little question: what's a Yooper?

[san diego sue]

Thank you for coming back and updating us. So glad your life has taken

on new happiness.

[easyboy]

Thank you for sharing!