Would you care?

[Towel Critter]

Expanding on that thought, there have been plenty of threads of not only a table for 2, but some people want to be far far away so they don't have to listen to strangers and don't want strangers hearing them....that is the "bubble mentality"....Those people need to find the remote cabin

 

Please define "bubble mentality." I've seen that "term" used before on CC... possibly by you, though I'm not certain. I googled "bubble mentality" out of curiosity, but the only references to it I saw were in a financial context. Is this a term you invented to make introversion sound like an offense to society? I have to assume you are an extrovert, since many extroverts find introversion unfathomable and threatening. Odd that this doesn't work in reverse. Introverts understand extroversion and have no issue with it. To them it's just a different way of living/being than what feels natural to them. They/we (yes, I am an introvert) DO have some difficulty in understanding why some extroverts find introversion so threatening and repulsive. In this day and age when being tolerant of "other" is held in such high esteem, and when so much headway has been made in the area of tolerance of "other" by many, many people, it seems so backward to hear/read someone try and either openly, or subtlety, denigrate a group of people simply because their inherent personality type is different from theirs.

 

Okay, I'll get off my soap box now. Happy cruising.

[Je Souhaite]

Say you went to the MDR on the first night of the cruise, and you had two strangers as tablemates. You didn't have much in common (different age groups, languages, whatever) and the next night you noticed they had spoken to the Maitre D and got a new, private table. Would you care? Would you take offense to it?

 

EDIT: The title was supposed to read "Would you care"

 

It's actually happened to us twice.

 

Our first cruise, there was a couple directly across from us, who spoke only french to each other, yet communicated fine with the waiters.

 

The next night we just ignored them, until we realized it was no longer them, but another couple. We had a good laugh, and are still friends 30 years later.

 

Another time, there was a childless couple at a table we we and another couple had a child. I guess they felt awkward. They were switched by the third night.

 

Our last Carnival cruise. we were at a table by ourselves. The service was SO BAD we wanted to change tables to get away from those servers, but we didn't. We just hit them monetarily.

[coevan]

We don't go out of our way to meet people. We love YTD and sit at a 2 top. We might friend 2 or 3 like couples and enjoy some drinks, trivia, or going to a show together. I hope we are not in a bubble.

[georgia1980]

happened to us earlier this year. our first cruise. The first night was with some really nice people and enjoyed it. I wonder what happened, as the next night they had switched to another table. I don't believe we said or done anything wrong.

[First and Ten]

Please define "bubble mentality." I've seen that "term" used before on CC... possibly by you, though I'm not certain. I googled "bubble mentality" out of curiosity, but the only references to it I saw were in a financial context. Is this a term you invented to make introversion sound like an offense to society? I have to assume you are an extrovert, since many extroverts find introversion unfathomable and threatening. Odd that this doesn't work in reverse. Introverts understand extroversion and have no issue with it. To them it's just a different way of living/being than what feels natural to them. They/we (yes, I am an introvert) DO have some difficulty in understanding why some extroverts find introversion so threatening and repulsive. In this day and age when being tolerant of "other" is held in such high esteem, and when so much headway has been made in the area of tolerance of "other" by many, many people, it seems so backward to hear/read someone try and either openly, or subtlety, denigrate a group of people simply because their inherent personality type is different from theirs.

 

Okay, I'll get off my soap box now. Happy cruising.

 

I take offense with your post. You want to point to extroverts and make generalizations that extroverts find intorverts "unfathomable and threatening"....That is not true. While some extroverts MAY feel that way, I know I don't. If I had to categorize myself, I would say I am more of an extrovert....Does that mean I find an introvert "unfathomable and threatening"....ABSOLUTELY NOT. I find your generalization a bit ignorant in that you admit you are an introvert. It seems you are just assuming that extroverts find introverts "unfathomable and threatening". How can you possibly make that generalization? Example of a "Bubble Mentality"....basically a regular table for 2 is not sufficient....they need a table for 2 far far away from anyone around them because they don't want to listen to anyones conversation nor do they want anyone else to hear theirs....To correct you, "Bubblers" can include both extroverts and introverts. Not limited to one personality type :D

Edited September 26, 2016 by First and Ten

[originalgeek]

I wouldn't care. They are strangers that you will never interact with again and probably just saved you a week of uncomfortable meals.

 

I would also disagree that they would owe the other couple an explanation. Again they are strangers and are free to do as they please.

 

Exactly what I was gonna say. We like the idea of meeting new people and I probably would not be the one to request a change but if they do, it's probably for the best.

[Sweet Dutch Girl]

Is their something wrong with having a "bubble mentality"? Or preferring your own company to the company of others or wanting a bit of coupling or solitude when eating dinner without being subjected to other conversations. Sure, it may be hard to find that on a cruise ship where 4000 people share limited space but it doesn't mean the "search" for peaceful bliss is unwarranted, I wouldn't think.

[First and Ten]

Is their something wrong with having a "bubble mentality"? Or preferring your own company to the company of others or wanting a bit of coupling or solitude when eating dinner without being subjected to other conversations. Sure, it may be hard to find that on a cruise ship where 4000 people share limited space but it doesn't mean the "search" for peaceful bliss is unwarranted, I wouldn't think.

 

I would agree with your assertion that complete solitude is pretty challenging on a boat filled with 4000+ people....I earlier made the suggestion for "Bubblers" that a remote mountain lodge may be more to their liking

Edited September 26, 2016 by First and Ten

[Towel Critter]

I take offense with your post. You want to point to extroverts and make generalizations that extroverts find intorverts "unfathomable and threatening"....That is not true. While some extroverts MAY feel that way, I know I don't. If I had to categorize myself, I would say I am more of an extrovert....Does that mean I find an introvert "unfathomable and threatening"....ABSOLUTELY NOT. I find your generalization a bit ignorant in that you admit you are an introvert. It seems you are just assuming that extroverts find introverts "unfathomable and threatening". How can you possibly make that generalization? Example of a "Bubble Mentality"....basically a regular table for 2 is not sufficient....they need a table for 2 far far away from anyone around them because they don't want to listen to anyones conversation nor do they want anyone else to hear theirs....To correct you, "Bubblers" can include both extroverts and introverts. Not limited to one personality type :D

 

If you found my post offensive, I assure you I found yours the same... so we are even. To answer your question about my "generalizations," that extroverts find introversion unfathomable and threatening isn't something I just made up. I can't remember the title of the book (wish I could), but I have read that this is generally true. Many extroverts simply can't fathom not wanting to act in an extroverted way, or why some act in that way. I suspect they take it personally. It isn't an insult, just a psychological fact. Notice I said "many." I did not say all. Good for you if you respect and understand introversion, but your post certainly didn't suggest it in it's tone and use of a term you still haven't explained the origin of.

 

Regarding your use of the term "ignorant," if you had gone with "biased," your comment would have been a little more acceptable, as perhaps I unavoidably am on this subject, but "IGNORANT?" Again, you choose to throw in a derogatory term when it is uncalled for, as you did with "Bubble mentality." Aren't you aware of the old axiom, "you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar?" I don't wish to argue this topic for hours, but it would serve you well in future posts to choose your language a little better and avoid negative sounding labels. I assure you I didn't respond to your post in the way I did because of the subject matter, but because of the tone and language you used, which I took offense to.

 

Edit: PS- I reread over my post and I did not once say "extroverts find introversion unfathomable and threatening." I said "many" do. If I had gone with the former, then yes my words would have definitely been a generalization. I did not.

Edited September 26, 2016 by Towel Critter

[First and Ten]

If you found my post offensive, I assure you I found yours the same... so we are even. To answer your question about my "generalizations," that extroverts find introversion unfathomable and threatening isn't something I just made up. I can't remember the title of the book (wish I could), but I have read that this is generally true. Many extroverts simply can't fathom not wanting to act in an extroverted way, or why some act in that way. I suspect they take it personally. It isn't an insult, just a psychological fact. Notice I said "many." I did not say all. Good for you if you respect and understand introversion, but your post certainly didn't suggest it in it's tone and use of a term you still haven't explained the origin of.

 

Regarding your use of the term "ignorant," if you had gone with "biased," your comment would have been a little more acceptable, as perhaps I unavoidably am on this subject, but "IGNORANT?" Again, you choose to throw in a derogatory term when it is uncalled for, as you did with "Bubble mentality." Aren't you aware of the old axiom, "you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar?" I don't wish to argue this topic for hours, but it would serve you well in future posts to choose your language a little better and avoid negative sounding labels. I assure you I didn't respond to your post in the way I did because of the subject matter, but because of the tone and language you used, which I took offense to.

 

I would disagree that using the word ignorant is derogatory....If I used the word "stupid" or called you an "idiot", I would agree that would be derogatory. I said ignorant in that since you are an introvert, you are indeed "ignorant" to the ways of an extrovert....Being biased displays an unfair prejudice against something. I would think that would be more derogatory than ignorant....Being fair, YOU were the one who brought up Introvert vs Extrovert, not me. You took the conversation there. I was talking about "Bubblers", to which I did explain can be comprised of Extroverts and Introverts....Its a very accepting group in that it has all types, none of whom want to associate with anyone :D

Edited September 26, 2016 by First and Ten

[Sweet Dutch Girl]

I would agree with your assertion that complete solitude is pretty challenging on a boat filled with 4000+ people....I earlier made the suggestion for "Bubblers" that a remote mountain lodge may be more to their liking

 

I have sailed solo when I am in one of my "I want to be alone" periods in my life. It isn't that hard to find the solace and quiet on a ship that you seem to find out of place (and I'm sorry if I am putting words in your mouth). Wanting to be alone inside one's own head isn't about divorcing one's self from society (though I get the feeling you may correlate one with the other) and it isn't meant to be offensive to anyone. Giving people their space, if they so desire it, is actually a good thing and considering such behavior rude, when it is happening adjacent to your space, shows a bit of an intolerant mentality. And, for the life of me, I can't understand why anyone would think that not interacting with perfect strangers is wrong by anyone. Sometimes people want to interact, sometimes they don't.

Edited September 26, 2016 by Sweet Dutch Girl

[firemanbobswife]

Seriously, who cares what other people do? So what if they want to sit by themselves? So what if they only want to sit at a large table? So what if they never want to eat in the MDR because of.....whatever? As long as they are following the rules and not disturbing anyone, who cares? Mind your own business and enjoy your meal.

[The4Cruisers]

Hard to put myself into this poll as we are the "bad people" that only want to sit by themselves in the MDR. Yes, we sit as a family and I take the necessary steps to arrange that when we board.

 

So as far as the poll... If we were seated with others and they moved away, I wouldn't mind one bit. In fact, I would encourage it! :D

[sandij]

We've had it happen and most likely due to a language barrier, I blamed it on my DH's lame jokes.

[tef43]

C - Not applicable, as we would be the ones requesting the private table.

[First and Ten]

I have sailed solo when I am in one of my "I want to be alone" periods in my life. It isn't that hard to find the solace and quiet on a ship that you seem to find out of place (and I'm sorry if I am putting words in your mouth). Wanting to be alone inside one's own head isn't about divorcing one's self from society (though I get the feeling you may correlate one with the other) and it isn't meant to be offensive to anyone. Giving people their space, if they so desire it, is actually a good thing and considering such behavior rude, when it is happening adjacent to your space, shows a bit of an intolerant mentality. And, for the life of me, I can't understand why anyone would think that not interacting with perfect strangers is wrong by anyone. Sometimes people want to interact, sometimes they don't.

 

Its easy to find quiet and solace in the MDR? :confused:

 

I would agree if you said a quiet dinner on the Lido deck or even in one of the specialty restaurants.....I don't think of the MDR as "quiet" during the dinner rushes

Edited September 26, 2016 by First and Ten

[Towel Critter]

I would disagree that using the word ignorant is derogatory....If I used the word "stupid" or called you an "idiot", I would agree that would be derogatory. I said ignorant in that since you are an introvert, you are indeed "ignorant" to the ways of an extrovert....Being biased displays an unfair prejudice against something. I would think that would be more derogatory than ignorant....Being fair, YOU were the one who brought up Introvert vs Extrovert, not me. You took the conversation there. I was talking about "Bubblers", to which I did explain can be comprised of Extroverts and Introverts....Its a very accepting group in that it has all types, none of whom want to associate with anyone :D

Fair enough. I knew well enough that the term "ignorant" is not inherently negative. On the other hand, some use it in that way, and it's hard to discern in which way it is being used without the benefit of voice tone and body language. Coming on the heels of "bubblers," it certainly reeked of negative intent to me. Perhaps I was wrong about that, though I'm still skeptical to be honest. I'll take your words at face value and accept that you didn't mean it negatively.

 

I do not think at all that I am ignorant of extroversion. I am not, as most are not, 100% introverted (I'm sure you know this, just as you know most extroverts are not 100% extroverted). I'm quite capable of extroversion and have pretty good people skills. I think where the terms introverted and extroverted come into play is in which one feels the most comfort with and which requires less energy. Extroversion for me requires a conscious effort and requires a good bit of energy. I'm good with it for periods of time, but then have to recharge my batteries... alone, or in the company of close friends. This is why when on vacation I prefer just the company of my wife. She is similar and fortunately we are a very happily married couple that enjoys each other's company. This is why we prefer to dine alone. For us, vacations are about US as a couple and not about meeting others and making new friends. Some are just the opposite and that is perfectly okay.

 

Anyway, I'm not trying to pick a fight. Your term "bubbler" offended me, so I responded to your post. Perhaps you don't use such labels to denigrate. I couldn't say. But labels easily get one into trouble. I avoid them at all costs, especially when tone and body language can't be called upon to give context or intent. Perhaps you should pause and reconsider before you use labels, regardless of your intent. The term introverts sounds much more pleasant than "bubblers," Introversion sounds much more pleasant than "bubble mentality." It seems to me that anytime "__________ mentality" is used, regardless of what fills the blank, there is almost always questionable intent behind its use.

 

How is it an extrovert can be a "bubbler?" I'm genuinely curious. The two terms seem mutually exclusive. Please elaborate, and I apologize if you already have done so earlier in this thread. I'm new to this thread and may have missed it.

 

That's all.

Edited September 26, 2016 by Towel Critter

[ChicoCA]

Offending others by "being me" I wear that like a badge of honor. :p

[First and Ten]

Anyway, I'm not trying to pick a fight. Your term "bubbler" offended me, so I responded to your post. Perhaps you don't use such labels to denigrate. I couldn't say. But labels easily get one into trouble. I avoid them at all costs, especially when tone and body language can't be called upon to give context or intent. Perhaps you should pause and reconsider before you use labels, regardless of your intent. The term introverts sounds much more pleasant than "bubblers," Introversion sounds much more pleasant than "bubble mentality." It seems to me that anytime "__________ mentality" is used, regardless of what fills the blank, there is almost always questionable intent behind its use.

 

That's all.

 

Towel, there are plenty of offensive words in the English language. I do not think "Bubbler" or "Firstie" (yes, that is my word, I am thinking of patenting it and selling to Carnival :p) qualify on the "offensive" list. So lets not go overboard. Now this is where someone can take what I am about to say next as rude and I don't mean it that way, so I will apologize upfront if you are sensitive and get offended. I don't look at it being rude, just direct....You tell me how I should construct my posts and tell me what I should and should not say. I don't tell you how to write your posts, I would ask for the same consideration from you....we good?

Edited September 26, 2016 by First and Ten

[sanmarcosman]

" I knew well enough that the term "ignorant" is not inherently negative. On the other hand, some use it in that way "

 

Oh the irony, people who use it that way are the very essence of ignorance :)

Edited September 26, 2016 by sanmarcosman

[Sweet Dutch Girl]

Its easy to find quiet and solace in the MDR? :confused:

 

I would agree if you said a quiet dinner on the Lido deck or even in one of the specialty restaurants.....I don't think of the MDR as "quiet" during the dinner rushes

 

I'm laughing because "quiet" sometimes has absolutely nothing to do with "noise". I'm great at "tuning out the world" whether it be in the middle of a cruiseline dining room or at a rock concert. I'm sure many others are the same. I'm not quite sure of the point you are so intent on making...other than the fact that I get the strong vibe that you feel it is inappropriate for anyone to choose "to be quiet and aloof" amid a roomful of people and that you find it rude if people choose to be so and have a gazillion reasons why people "can't" be "by themselves or coupling" on a cruise ship to the point you "suggest" that people stay off the ship and don't ruin your personal vibe.

[Towel Critter]

Towel, there are plenty of offensive words in the English language. I do not think "Bubbler" or "Firstie" (yes, that is my word, I am thinking of patenting it and selling to Carnival :p) qualify on the "offensive" list. So lets not go overboard. Now this is where someone can take what I am about to say next as rude and I don't mean it that way, so I will apologize upfront if you are sensitive and get offended. I don't look at it being rude, just direct....You tell me how I should construct my posts and tell me what I should and should not say. I don't tell you how to write your posts, I would ask for the same consideration from you....we good?

We good. You telling me you are "direct" explains a lot. You and I are about as opposite, personality wise, as it gets. Yes, I am the "sensitive" type, as you have correctly LABELED me. You seem to be the insensitive type. In all honestly, our kinds do not mix well. I'll refrain from engaging with you in the future. Nothing good would come of it.

[cocod08]

I'd be relieved. I've been in this situation myself where one of the couples I was sitting with were very religious and talking to the wait staff about accepting Jesus and it was very uncomfortable. I at least could excuse myself as it was at the end of the meal but the waiters could not.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Xerxella]

Seriously, who cares what other people do? So what if they want to sit by themselves? So what if they only want to sit at a large table? So what if they never want to eat in the MDR because of.....whatever? As long as they are following the rules and not disturbing anyone, who cares? Mind your own business and enjoy your meal.

 

 

[emoji1426]This.

[Sparky2]

Say you went to the MDR on the first night of the cruise, and you had two strangers as tablemates. You didn't have much in common (different age groups, languages, whatever) and the next night you noticed they had spoken to the Maitre D and got a new, private table. Would you care? Would you take offense to it?

 

EDIT: The title was supposed to read "Would you care"

 

We had this happen to us a few years ago. We were in a booth for 4. The next day our tablemates did not show up & we saw them walk upstairs to the upper DR.

 

We had gone to Maitre'd to ask for table for 2 & told we probably would not get it. I know they were Platinum and maybe they also went to request table for 2 and got it. Very strange, though.

 

We happened to go on a tour with me and when we went to get the free treet, they had skipped over a table for 3 & chose a table for 4. We assumed they expected us to join them so we did. It just seemed so strange for them not to tell us why they left.

 

The next year we were cruising with friends (7 of us) and our "linked cruises" became "unlinked". Therefore, we were at 3 different tables. We went to the maitre'd to have them changed, but he was unable to do it till the 2nd day. The next night we stopped at our original table to explain why we'd left them. Someone else had already been assigned in our place.