Roll call etiquette...or...a sticky situation

[spongerob]

What should one do when joining a roll call thread that has been going for some time, then finding out that there were some conflicts that have caused ill will amongst the members who have been posting for several months or more? I don't want to choose sides but feel I can't participate with one group without offending the other.

[cb at sea]

Ignore any of the conflicts? Or, don't join in? Seems as long as your "conversations" are just general and basic, there shouldn't be a problem.

[okgirl]

What should one do when joining a roll call thread that has been going for some time, then finding out that there were some conflicts that have caused ill will amongst the members who have been posting for several months or more? I don't want to choose sides but feel I can't participate with one group without offending the other.

 

I don't think that kind of infighting or clique has any place on these boards and should be more harshly dealt with by the moderators. But having said that, there are a lot of strong personalities and people just need to agree to disagree. What a boring place it would be if we all shared the same attitude and experience.

 

There are always going to be people in every group that are "negative nelda's" but I just avoid them and disengage when necessary.

 

If I were in your situation I would still be part of the roll call but just refuse to ever entertain any negative conversations regarding anyone's position. If anyone is suggesting an activity and you are interested, then participate. Don't worry if it is going to offend someone else, that is their problem.

 

And frankly if your participation with one group of people over another has someone po'd I wouldn't want to associate with such over bearing people.

[TahoeBob]

What should one do when joining a roll call thread that has been going for some time, then finding out that there were some conflicts that have caused ill will amongst the members who have been posting for several months or more? I don't want to choose sides but feel I can't participate with one group without offending the other.

 

Just don't add anything to the conflict. If someone wants you to take sides or does not like who you are participating with that will give you some insight on who is worth talking to.

[GORDONCHICK]

Unfortunately, since there really isn't a written roll call etiquette, you really have to use your own best judgement. I'm having the same issue, kind of, but it's just with one person so it's easy to get past them. And that's easier to do when the roll call is a decent size and pretty active.

 

It would be nice if the mods would get involved every now and then, and they might if they were specifically asked to. But at the same time, we're supposed to be adults and work out our problems like grown ups instead of toddlers in the sandbox.

[yogi2929]

Depending on the cruiseline there might be other roll calls out there. Carnival has carnivalconnections dot com. It's like CC but only for Carnival.

[Krazy Kruizers]

I would just drop out.

[CapeCodCruiser]

You should be able to participate in the roll call without participating in the drama.

 

If the whole roll call is nothing BUT drama then you probably don't want to hang with those folks any way!

[toberman]

What should one do when joining a roll call thread that has been going for some time, then finding out that there were some conflicts that have caused ill will amongst the members who have been posting for several months or more? I don't want to choose sides but feel I can't participate with one group without offending the other.

 

spongerob, I just read several pages of your roll call and I have to say there appears to have been some immaturity going on there for awhile. But it seems to have quieted down and the problems are not even being talked about.

 

I'd stay with it unless something else starts brewing.

 

It's really too bad. Roll calls are such a great way to meet your fellow cruisers and make meaningful, lasting friendships.

 

Janette

[grandmato4]

You should be able to participate in the roll call without participating in the drama.

 

If the whole roll call is nothing BUT drama then you probably don't want to hang with those folks any way!

 

I couldn't have said this better!;) While we had a frantastic rollcall on our last cruise and made life long friends other rollcalls before it weren't all great and that was fine. The one were on now seems very nice. We don't cruise because of a rollcall. If I found we were part of a rollcall that was mostly just one drama after another I simply wouldn't participate any longer and wouldn't give it another thought.

[Krazy Kruizers]

You should be able to participate in the roll call without participating in the drama.

 

If the whole roll call is nothing BUT drama then you probably don't want to hang with those folks any way!

 

That's why I dropped out of one of our Roll Calls.

[toberman]

That's why I dropped out of one of our Roll Calls.

 

I have to reiterate that is very sad. I have participated in, and have been very happy with all our roll calls. We have made lifelong friends, and I think roll calls are part of a great cruise experience.

 

I do feel badly for those that are part of a group that isn't a lot of fun. I'm just glad that I haven't been on one of those.

 

Janette

[mtwingcpa]

Not all roll calls are the same, that's for sure. Some have been extremely helpful and I've followed them closely. Others... ???

 

If we're talking about roll call "etiquette" here, my request would be that people refrain from excessive medical discussions. If you have to cancel your trip for medical reasons, just say so and leave it at that. I really don't need to read endlessly about all the bloody details!

[RetireeWannabee]

Seems to me that you are Switzerland, not taking sides, just doing your thing. Participate in the way that suits you, and if that proves impossible to sustain without stress, bail out.

 

life's too short.

[cruiserbryce]

no reason to get involved...the vacation is yours and there's no reason to even worry about others childish antics...and really...how in the world could you get into a conflict on a message board roll call:confused:

[buckanear]

I know which roll call that is, it's kind of a sticky situation.

 

I would just participate and ignore the drama. Last year, I was part of a roll call where I told someone that if they were sick (2nd round of antibiotics) that they should consider not going instead of being denied or quarantined. You can imagine how many friends that I made! I got called all kinds of things. Anyways, I went to the meet and mingle and hung out with the others not involved in the drama and made some really good friends that I'm still in touch with.

[RoofingPrincess]

We don't cruise because of a rollcall.

I actually dropped a cruise because of a roll call. It became apparent that this was a group that cruised together at least annually (on this same cruise) and had a lot of organized activities. No big deal, except -- my cabin was surrounded by them, since we had all landed prime locations the minute bookings opened. I felt that my ability to enjoy my cruise would've been negatively affected by the group, and since one of the reasons I'd booked that particular cruise was because of the cabin location I'd managed to get, I decided to cancel the cruise.

But if I'd been in a situation like the OP, I would've either just lurked on the Roll Call or stopped reading it entirely.

[BroncosFan2010]

Start your own roll call for the sailing??? It is sad that you would be made to feel uncomfortable in the roll call! I would try to be as friendly as possible, keep my coments neutral, and just have a good time on the cruise. If people want to be petty and cause problems, let it ruin their own vacation, not yours.

[GORDONCHICK]

Start your own roll call for the sailing??? It is sad that you would be made to feel uncomfortable in the roll call! I would try to be as friendly as possible, keep my coments neutral, and just have a good time on the cruise. If people want to be petty and cause problems, let it ruin their own vacation, not yours.

 

The mods combine roll call threads with the same dates.....

[reallyitsmema]

I actually dropped a cruise because of a roll call. It became apparent that this was a group that cruised together at least annually (on this same cruise) and had a lot of organized activities. No big deal, except -- my cabin was surrounded by them, since we had all landed prime locations the minute bookings opened. I felt that my ability to enjoy my cruise would've been negatively affected by the group, and since one of the reasons I'd booked that particular cruise was because of the cabin location I'd managed to get, I decided to cancel the cruise.

But if I'd been in a situation like the OP, I would've either just lurked on the Roll Call or stopped reading it entirely.

I didn't book a cruise on a particular ship because of the rollcall. It was a group cruise that I saw many posts about so I asked a question. I was attacked by the group leader and one of the other cruisers that were going on the cruise. I had a group of friends that were looking to cruise together but there was no way I was going to be the one that suggested cruising with this group after such a negative interaction.

[momofmeg]

What should one do when joining a roll call thread that has been going for some time, then finding out that there were some conflicts that have caused ill will amongst the members who have been posting for several months or more? I don't want to choose sides but feel I can't participate with one group without offending the other.

 

Like others, I looked at your profile and read some of your roll call. It seems petty to me-one person wants a cabin crawl and a slot pull for the group and another wants to keep it simple with only a gift exchange-and the one who wants to control everything does not want a gift exchange, but all the other activities.

 

It seems he also wants a group to do excursions together too? I scanned it-so I may be wrong on this.

 

Personally, me, I would not participate in the cabin crawl and slot pull- I am not interested in those type things. A gift exchange I will do if most want to-but I do not mind if others are not interested.

 

Actually all I want out of a roll call in 30 minutes or an hour visiting with fellow CCers and meeting some of the guys/gals I have posted to over the years. I do not want to spend my cruise doing activites with a bunch of other people. I am happy spending time with my husband for the most part. I don't need to do excursions with fellow CCers. Now my hubby, if others are diving,he may want to share a taxi,if he books a private dive company-but that is it. If I run into folks on the roll call -around ship or in port-I will say hello and chat for 5 minutes. To me that is all most are interested in doing.

 

I agree with others. Just drop the rollcall. Enjoy your cruise and forget about this-nothing to stress about.

 

BTW-I never give my cabin number on a roll call-I just say I do not want to say. Most people are decent, but it only takes one crazy that you would not want to have that information. Sensible people understand that-only a crazy would be offended by your not wanting to share that information.

[MrsLeo]

Here my two cents... I took a little time to look over the roll call and the power & control issues in question. My advice is to stick with Snoozeman (the fellow who started the roll call in the very beginning). You'll have more fun with him and he is easy on the nerves. You won't have to put up with any petty tyrant stuff.

[yogi2929]

Found the roll call and found the problem spot. One person caused problems and s/he hasn't been back since for the past 3-4 pages. They are all nice now, didn't see anybody making anyone else 'pick' sides. There is alot planned and it looks like fun. A meet, cabin crawl, poker pull and gift exchange are all being planned.

[Langley Cruisers]

That's why I dropped out of one of our Roll Calls.

 

And that's why we didn't join one of our Roll Calls. Just didn't appeal to us. Joining a RC is not essential to enjoying your cruise, and we have found in the past that they both enhance and don't enhance our cruise experience. How's that for noncommittal? :D :rolleyes:

[SheilaNC]

Do remember to use the Alert icon if any comments are violations of community guidelines. Hosts only know of such issues if alerted. They are not routinely assigned to Roll Calls - too many threads, no enough Hosts. But action will be taken if alerts are sent. In the meantime, many of you have provided appropriate strategies...and they are helpful across the board. Enjoy your cruises!