steph7021 Posted February 5, 2016 #26 Share Posted February 5, 2016 This is the one behavior that drives me nuts because it means that they don't care about anyone but themselves. As others have suggested, let her worry about her. However, I hope she's not the only one you are cruising with because that would be horrible. Even if she manages not to miss the ship at each port, she's likely to be late at everything else you do. If it's just the two of you cruising, I hope she respects your long friendship and tries not to be so selfish! Good luck but I really wouldn't waste anymore time on alternatives...that's probably what she's used to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BellaSweet Posted February 5, 2016 #27 Share Posted February 5, 2016 I know she's a friend but I think I would worry about myself and let her worry about herself. Sounds like too much stress for you before a vacation. Enjoy This, exactly. Focus on getting yourself on the ship and let her deal with her own issues. I don't put up with people like that. Its disrespectful to you and others to be perpetually late. I couldn't be friends with someone so rude. I was born 8 weeks early and I've continued to be early for everything my entire life. I get so anxious if I'm even close to being late. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drazil65 Posted February 5, 2016 #28 Share Posted February 5, 2016 (edited) Thanks for the insight all. I know it was a crazy thought. I'll put in a call to my PVP and see what the options are for missed embarkation as well. I like to have backup plans! The very reason she lives in her own time zone and gets away with it is because she is surrounded by people that always "fix" things for her and have a back up plan for her. She is a grown woman and should have her own back up plan, I am sorry but enabling people is the foundation of their issues. You seem worried about the whole thing and I am sure she has not even thought twice about it. Hopefully you have other people going with you as well. Let her know that you will meet her on the ship and will be having a good time, see her when she gets there and if not, plan on having yourself a great time anyway... Edited February 5, 2016 by Drazil65 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hockeyluver Posted February 5, 2016 #29 Share Posted February 5, 2016 I know she's a friend but I think I would worry about myself and let her worry about herself. Sounds like too much stress for you before a vacation. Enjoy My thoughts exactly, she is a grown up after all !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Savlamara Posted February 5, 2016 Author #30 Share Posted February 5, 2016 (edited) But she IS the only one I'd be cruising with... So if she isnt there I'd have to wander around like a dope by myself all week! I'm not very social with strangers. =( Edited February 5, 2016 by Savlamara Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zqvol Posted February 5, 2016 #31 Share Posted February 5, 2016 Okay I have a friend that is extremely, i mean EXTREMELY late. She misses or is late for every. single. thing. Flights, work, church, shows, everything. I am trying to think positive, but after 20 years of knowing her, I love her, but I have to be realistic. Here is the question, what is the penalty for missing embarkation, and flying in and getting on at the next port? Would that even be possible to get on at the next port? On the sailing I am speaking of getting on i think day 2 or 3 if she misses embarkation. She pays her own way, and they may or may not let her board. If her reason is just that she was late, and not because of a flight delay she will likely be denied boarding. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zqvol Posted February 5, 2016 #32 Share Posted February 5, 2016 But she IS the only one I'd be cruising with... So if she isnt there I'd have to wander around like a dope by myself all week! I'm not very social with strangers. =( Lots of people travel solo. It is not a big deal, and you don't have to be social, just find things you like to do and have a good time. It is a great way to relax. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mickide Posted February 5, 2016 #33 Share Posted February 5, 2016 I know she's a friend but I think I would worry about myself and let her worry about herself. Sounds like too much stress for you before a vacation. Enjoy My thoughts exactly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elliair Posted February 5, 2016 #34 Share Posted February 5, 2016 Trust me I have done the earlier time thing many times, but she has her own booking and gets emailed the same info I do. So she knows what the actual times are. Plus she would be flying into the port. I am fine with coming the day before, but she isnt. So she would fly in the day of. Don't let her drag you down. She's an adult, if she can't get there on time, get on board and enjoy yourself. It will be her loss not yours. Tough love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
firemanbobswife Posted February 5, 2016 #35 Share Posted February 5, 2016 (edited) But she IS the only one I'd be cruising with... So if she isnt there I'd have to wander around like a dope by myself all week! I'm not very social with strangers. =( I travel solo a lot and enjoy it. Your options are limited. Either you cruise with her as a room mate and keep your fingers crossed and hope she makes it, but be prepared to sail solo if she doesn't. Find a different cruise mate all together, or add a third person. Edited February 5, 2016 by firemanbobswife Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jenhem31 Posted February 5, 2016 #36 Share Posted February 5, 2016 Also, maybe do your time dining so she's not late to dinner every night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wantocruisemore Posted February 5, 2016 #37 Share Posted February 5, 2016 My DH is always late so I tell him earlier times and I plan everything. If friend refuses to fly in day before, can you be on same plane and after it lands you herd her to taxi and ship. Don't leave it for her to travel alone. If not, remind her all the money she will lose and you go on and have a great time. You can't save everyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KatieCharlotte Posted February 5, 2016 #38 Share Posted February 5, 2016 But she IS the only one I'd be cruising with... So if she isnt there I'd have to wander around like a dope by myself all week! I'm not very social with strangers. =( If you're not an extreme extrovert, you will probably have a relaxing time alone. There are plenty of solo cruisers and other people who spend time alone on board. You won't look like a dope. You can join ship excursions, and plenty of people take those alone. But honestly, I've found that people who are late for just about everything are not late when they know that they will suffer and no one can fix it for them. You can find out what time her flight comes in and how she's getting to the port, but then you have to tell her that it's up to her. Don't let your stress affect your pre-cruise excitement. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjrice1 Posted February 5, 2016 #39 Share Posted February 5, 2016 Tell her they change the time... push it back 3 hours of so.. Might be on time.. Okay I have a friend that is extremely, i mean EXTREMELY late. She misses or is late for every. single. thing. Flights, work, church, shows, everything. I am trying to think positive, but after 20 years of knowing her, I love her, but I have to be realistic. Here is the question, what is the penalty for missing embarkation, and flying in and getting on at the next port? Would that even be possible to get on at the next port? On the sailing I am speaking of getting on i think day 2 or 3 if she misses embarkation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Savlamara Posted February 5, 2016 Author #40 Share Posted February 5, 2016 You guys are awesome... :D Thanks for all the great suggestions and tips. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TORQ Posted February 5, 2016 #41 Share Posted February 5, 2016 Hopefully you are not booked in same cabin - sounds like a disaster waiting to happen !She is an adult, she will only learn to be responsible when she gets left behind/left out because of being late. My wife has a friend who is usually late. When she is too late, she gets left behind. You said that nicer than I would have LIZARD. Being a Navy VET. your never late! And to pull off Article 87, missing Ships movement!!! Ever heard the words Court Martial, or perhaps Captains Mast? Then again like Jimmy Buffet would say, Breathe in breathe out MOVE ON! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandij Posted February 5, 2016 #42 Share Posted February 5, 2016 You are enabling her to do this. Stop adjusting your time schedule to accomodate her, after she misses a few things she'll get the idea or spend a lot of time by herself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athankfulheart Posted February 5, 2016 #43 Share Posted February 5, 2016 Thanks for the insight all. I know it was a crazy thought. I'll put in a call to my PVP and see what the options are for missed embarkation as well. I like to have backup plans! The very reason she lives in her own time zone and gets away with it is because she is surrounded by people that always "fix" things for her and have a back up plan for her. She is a grown woman and should have her own back up plan, I am sorry but enabling people is the foundation of their issues. You seem worried about the whole thing and I am sure she has not even thought twice about it. Hopefully you have other people going with you as well. Let her know that you will meet her on the ship and will be having a good time, see her when she gets there and if not, plan on having yourself a great time anyway... ^^^This ^^^ My first piece of advice would be not to plan a vacation with a person like this. My second is typed above by another poster. Tell your friend that you will race her to the cabin and whoever gets there last buys the first round of beverages :p Then head out on your travels without worry. One of two things will happen - either she makes it or she doesn't. Babying her will only insure that the same issues happen the next time and the next time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harrier1961 Posted February 5, 2016 #44 Share Posted February 5, 2016 If you're not an extreme extrovert, you will probably have a relaxing time alone. There are plenty of solo cruisers and other people who spend time alone on board. You won't look like a dope. You can join ship excursions, and plenty of people take those alone. But honestly, I've found that people who are late for just about everything are not late when they know that they will suffer and no one can fix it for them. You can find out what time her flight comes in and how she's getting to the port, but then you have to tell her that it's up to her. Don't let your stress affect your pre-cruise excitement. :) Hell, I'm semi-anti- social and don't like crowds, but I have a blast when I cruise solo. Do what I want on my time. Don't have to worry about being entertained or entertaining anybody else. (Not that I don't love cruising with my better half!!!) The last time I cruised solo, I happened to have awesome tablemates and we had a blast at the piano bar and disco. :p Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
USNUZULOOSE Posted February 5, 2016 #45 Share Posted February 5, 2016 This woman is an adult. I would not enable or fix things for her. This is why she continues to do this. You need to step back and let her do it. If she misses her own vacation that is on her. And if she asks why you did not do xyz I would say you are an adult I can't hold your hand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2xsin12mths Posted February 5, 2016 #46 Share Posted February 5, 2016 Why would you even want to cruise with someone like this. This whole thread makes me anxious! I LOVE cruising but if I had to "babysit" a late person the entire time I would not have fun at all. Ugh! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rare sparks1093 Posted February 5, 2016 #47 Share Posted February 5, 2016 You said that nicer than I would have LIZARD. Being a Navy VET. your never late! And to pull off Article 87, missing Ships movement!!! Ever heard the words Court Martial, or perhaps Captains Mast?Then again like Jimmy Buffet would say, Breathe in breathe out MOVE ON! LOL, I'd almost rather lose a limb than to miss ship's movement:eek:, especially with a couple of the skippers that I had. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkportersat Posted February 5, 2016 #48 Share Posted February 5, 2016 (edited) You would be surprised as to how much fun you can have by yourself actually. I used to cruise with my kids when I was a single mom and they would ditch me for the teen areas. I have met so many wonderful folks on cruises. Try not to worry about your friend and focus on enjoying on your vacation, no matter what. Good luck to you. PS - I will say you can get to know people before hand as well, go check your sailings roll call and see if they are arranging a meet and great. Take matters in to your own hands!! But she IS the only one I'd be cruising with... So if she isnt there I'd have to wander around like a dope by myself all week! I'm not very social with strangers. =( Edited February 5, 2016 by tkportersat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BenjiRodney Posted February 5, 2016 #49 Share Posted February 5, 2016 Go enjoy yourself. Print off individual boarding passes for the cruise, if she shows up, fine, if not, have a great time and more space in the room for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rare crewsweeper Posted February 5, 2016 #50 Share Posted February 5, 2016 Like others have said here. Don't let fretting over her being late ruin your cruise before you start. Just make sure that if she's not there with you when you check in you can still check in and don't get hit with higher cabin rates as a single, if she never shows. Then call her up a couple of night before leaving, reconfirm your arrangements and ask if she has everything including the 800 number to call if she's delayed. So "see you on board" and then go on your merry way. Regardless of whether she doesn't shows up or can catch the ship later or meets you as you board with "where have you been? I'm on my 3rd DoD already!", have a great and hopefully restful cruise.:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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