Surprising someone onboard - try it...you'll like it.

[Firstin87]

3 hours ago, slavetoabunny said:

Agreed.  We have gone on two cruises with friends.  One was absolutely miserable and the second only tolerable.  Never again.

Just because you are friends does not necessarily mean you have the same travel preferences or expectations.  If we were ever to travel with friends, I'd want to be sure we planned it together and were all clear about what amount of time we'd spend together, doing what shore excursions together, etc.  Some people's routines don't align well - eating dinner early or later?  disembarking right away or sleeping in? 

[Sugar Magnolia]

8 hours ago, schmoopie17 said:

Oh, rats...you spoiled the surprise. Now I have nothing to look forward to. Except I can still look forward to meeting you and exchanging astute observations.

 

I must say, @schmoopie17, this was a clever way to filter out those less likely to exchange astute observations. Can we just stick to hash brown conversation observations?

 

[schmoopie17]

13 hours ago, Travelling2Some said:

  We can socialize with friends at home anytime.

Not an option for these friends. They live in AZ and we moved from AZ to WI. This may be the last time we get to travel with them due to the husband's medical issue.

[Sailing12Away]

On 12/6/2023 at 3:53 PM, Yesimapirate said:

No offense to the OP but in most cases I think it's pretty selfish and obnoxious to do this.

 

Think about all the months of planning people do for their vacation and that's suddenly upended because you now expect them to hang out with you.   These people aren't your family.   And while they may love you they may also love to plan their time with you. 

 

23 hours ago, complawyer said:

Do you think they'd be willing to give up those perks to accommodate you? Would you even ask them to.

 

 

Not meaning to call the 2 of you out specifically because there were many folks who shared similar sentiments - but why in the world would you assume that because someone else is on the same ship at the same time as you that it means the primary traveler has to change any of their plans or do anything to accommodate the tag along person? 

 

When we book trips, we tell all of our cruise friends. To us - the more the merrier. It doesn't mean we expect every person to join us for every meal, every excursion, every entertainment choice, etc. We book what we want, and let everyone else know about the things we would love for them to join us on. If they want to - great. If they don't - that's fine too. Heck, I don't even want to do some of the things my own hubby wants, do you honestly think I'll be able to find 6+ people who all want to do the same thing we do every time? Of course not. But the offer is there, and people can pick and choose if/when they want to join.

 

Our last NCL trip was on Prima with hubby & I, my sister, BIL, their 2 kids, and we had 2 friends as well as my BIL having his in-laws there as well (I think it was his sister's husbands brother.... who knows at that point, but it was people he knew). Hubby and I booked what we wanted for dinner, and shared the info with others. Some people joined us for one meal, some for 3, some for all, and some for none. We met up with folks when we could, and when we randomly bumped into others around the ship it was a fun surprise to see a familiar face.

 

That's it folks. Stop making this into something more than it is. It wasn't a nefarious, selfish, or obnoxious thing at all. If the primary traveler didn't want anyone to possibly tag along at all, they wouldn't share any details at all. 

 

On 12/7/2023 at 8:15 AM, cruiseny4life said:

Well, I guess I'm in the minority of folks that think this is a super cool idea! @schmoopie17 and others, if any of you would like to bug me on a cruise, please feel free! Just send some chocolate covered strawberries to my room first. 🙂

You need to advertise your upcoming trips better so that those of us who would love the chance to join you on a hash brown seeking adventure can find you easier.

[Laszlo]

On 12/8/2023 at 10:56 AM, sanger727 said:

This all seems to be going off the rails and out of context. There are many people who enjoy traveling with friends. Having a history of taking trips with these people and the fact that they were invited in the first place, makes this almost certainly a positive surprise. 

 

It has been noted that most of you would not like random, uninvited friends crashing your vacation. That is fair. 

Ditto, we like traveling with friends. Heather and Ken have traveled with us out west, the Outer Banks, Florida, Europe and the cruise. 

[Yesimapirate]

57 minutes ago, Sailing12Away said:

 

 

Not meaning to call the 2 of you out specifically because there were many folks who shared similar sentiments - but why in the world would you assume that because someone else is on the same ship at the same time as you that it means the primary traveler has to change any of their plans or do anything to accommodate the tag along person? 

 

When we book trips, we tell all of our cruise friends. To us - the more the merrier. It doesn't mean we expect every person to join us for every meal, every excursion, every entertainment choice, etc. We book what we want, and let everyone else know about the things we would love for them to join us on. If they want to - great. If they don't - that's fine too. Heck, I don't even want to do some of the things my own hubby wants, do you honestly think I'll be able to find 6+ people who all want to do the same thing we do every time? Of course not. But the offer is there, and people can pick and choose if/when they want to join.

 

Our last NCL trip was on Prima with hubby & I, my sister, BIL, their 2 kids, and we had 2 friends as well as my BIL having his in-laws there as well (I think it was his sister's husbands brother.... who knows at that point, but it was people he knew). Hubby and I booked what we wanted for dinner, and shared the info with others. Some people joined us for one meal, some for 3, some for all, and some for none. We met up with folks when we could, and when we randomly bumped into others around the ship it was a fun surprise to see a familiar face.

 

That's it folks. Stop making this into something more than it is. It wasn't a nefarious, selfish, or obnoxious thing at all. If the primary traveler didn't want anyone to possibly tag along at all, they wouldn't share any details at all. 

 

You need to advertise your upcoming trips better so that those of us who would love the chance to join you on a hash brown seeking adventure can find you easier.

There's a huge difference between planning a trip together,  randomly running into people you know and secretly, specifically booking a trip to be with someone who has no clue you're there.

Edited December 9, 2023 by Yesimapirate

[complawyer]

sailing 12 away. it appears your post (while very informative) compares apples and oranges.

 

your last trip with your entire zip code as traveling companions were all invited to cruise with you (from the way i interpret your post) They didnt magically appear as uninvited guests.  For the past few years, we have been cruising with a friend i've known for over 20years. we book a 2 bedroom suite, which not only lowers the price per person, but gives her the perks that come with.

 

we often take different  excursions, and sometimes she just goes and vegges out at the pool, or she'll go to a show or a lounge with my wife, so i can go back to our cabin and curl up with my kindle.

 

I am well aware that anyone traveling with us is also on vacation, and specifically, it's their vacation. I dont expect 24 togetherness.

 Sometimes, even on excursions she wanders off by herself. That's all well and good, it's her vacation. 

in the original post, after turning down the invite, they decided to surprise the other couple. 

 

I, like you, love traveling with others, (the more the merrier) 

But if youre in suite and want breakfast in moderno, or lunch at cagneys, if the others havent booked a suite, they cant join you for the duration. Of course you can choose to take meals together at other venues, but you are the one giving up the perk. For a cruise 14 days or longer, i dont think anyone would give up more than a few meals. we eat in the buffet, or MDR , but most of the time we use the perks offered.

 

This even gets more intensified if you are booked into a "haven"  Youre paying a luxury price for a luxury experience, your own dedicated restaurant, pool, lounge area and bar. youre friend will have no access to any of these. Plus in a suite category, you get priority boarding, tenders, disembarkation, etc.

 

im am definitely NOT against  traveling with friends of family. i do it often and enjoy the process. It's just surprise friends may not get the same goodies as you.  

 

[Tapi]

I have a good friend who lives in Miami who surprised us. We flew down from Atlanta to take a quick, 3 night cruise out of Miami. I'd asked him if he wanted to join us for lunch before getting on the ship but he declined, saying that "he had to work".

 

We got to our cabin and minutes later, someone knocked at our door. Surprise, surprise, it was him. We'd cruised together before and I was very happy to see him. We had an absolute blast. It was a very welcome and pleasant surprise. 

 

With that said, had it been a different friend on a different cruise, I probably would've been mortified. I have some great friends who I love hanging out with back home, but who I would NEVER want to travel with. 

[schmoopie17]

1 hour ago, Sailing12Away said:

 

That's it folks. Stop making this into something more than it is. It wasn't a nefarious, selfish, or obnoxious thing at all. If the primary traveler didn't want anyone to possibly tag along at all, they wouldn't share any details at all. 

 

 

Thank you for summarizing this in such an astute, rational way. Some people on this thread take the approach that we are somehow attempting to sabotage our friends' cruise, when our intention is to add to their experience since we KNOW our friends (none of you do) and KNOW that they enjoy traveling with us (as we have done in the past) and KNOW they would view it as a wonderful surprise. Especially since this will most likely be our last opportunity to travel with them...or possibly ever see them. As I said, we did this once before and the surprisees (if there's such a word) were overjoyed. It was fun for them (and us).

 

Like it or not, we'll probably do it yet again at some point. But the naysayers don't have to worry. We won't surprise you.

 

Edited December 9, 2023 by schmoopie17

[Sugar Magnolia]

9 minutes ago, schmoopie17 said:

Like it or not, we'll probably do it yet again at some point. 

 

How does one get on your surprise list? Is it a long waiting list? Secretly hoping...

 

[schmoopie17]

4 minutes ago, Sugar Magnolia said:

 

How does one get on your surprise list? Is it a long waiting list? Secretly hoping...

 

It starts by sending me your upcoming cruise. Do you dare?

[Sugar Magnolia]

1 minute ago, schmoopie17 said:

It starts by sending me your upcoming cruise. Do you dare?

Touché

 

[tundra1]

Hey, @schmoopie17!  Maybe most of these folks are not from Wisconsin, so they don't have the same background as we do!. Wisconsin is a very friendly, but fiercely independent state.  We love to welcome friends, family, coworkers, etc. to our events.  But there is never the expectation that we will have to "entertain" them 24/7.  We travel with friends often, and love the times we spend together, but also appreciate the times when we go off on our own. Question:  if a passenger is booked for "Haven", does that mean they are not allowed to dine in the MDR or participate in other events around the ship?  I don't understand the comment that if your friends were in the Haven, you would never be able to see them.

 

When I read the title of your post, I thought, "Oh, we should do that sometime!"  We also have friends from WI who have moved to AZ, and would love to surprise them one day.  And they would love to be surprised!  

 

Have a great time!  I look forward to your posts letting us know how the trip turned out!  

And, GO PACK GO!  💚💛💚

[Firstin87]

Guests in the Haven can dine at any restaurant, attend all events, etc.  They have access to the entire ship the same as everyone else.  What people mean by Haven guests not seeing non-Haven guests is that the Haven has specific perks (i.e., it's own restaurant - on most Haven ships - it's own bar/lounge) that are only for Haven guests - and you pay more to be in the Haven because of those amenities.  Only Haven guests can use those areas, so if a friend/ is booked in a non-Haven cabin, they cannot join you in the Haven restaurant, bar, pool, etc.  Consequently, to spend time with them, you are 'missing out' on using the Haven benefits that you have paid a pretty penny for.  Many guests book the Haven specifically for those benefits, so being surprised by a friend who is not also in the Haven can be tricky - you may be happy to see them, but would not have booked the Haven had you known they would be onboard, too.

[slavetoabunny]

1 hour ago, Firstin87 said:

Guests in the Haven can dine at any restaurant, attend all events, etc.  They have access to the entire ship the same as everyone else.  What people mean by Haven guests not seeing non-Haven guests is that the Haven has specific perks (i.e., it's own restaurant - on most Haven ships - it's own bar/lounge) that are only for Haven guests - and you pay more to be in the Haven because of those amenities.  Only Haven guests can use those areas, so if a friend/ is booked in a non-Haven cabin, they cannot join you in the Haven restaurant, bar, pool, etc.  Consequently, to spend time with them, you are 'missing out' on using the Haven benefits that you have paid a pretty penny for.  Many guests book the Haven specifically for those benefits, so being surprised by a friend who is not also in the Haven can be tricky - you may be happy to see them, but would not have booked the Haven had you known they would be onboard, too.

 Exactly.  None of the people I know would book Haven and I would feel compelled to dine with them in the MDR.

 

[Sailing12Away]

4 hours ago, complawyer said:

I, like you, love traveling with others, (the more the merrier) 

But if youre in suite and want breakfast in moderno, or lunch at cagneys, if the others havent booked a suite, they cant join you for the duration. Of course you can choose to take meals together at other venues, but you are the one giving up the perk. For a cruise 14 days or longer, i dont think anyone would give up more than a few meals. we eat in the buffet, or MDR , but most of the time we use the perks offered.

 

This even gets more intensified if you are booked into a "haven"  Youre paying a luxury price for a luxury experience, your own dedicated restaurant, pool, lounge area and bar. youre friend will have no access to any of these. Plus in a suite category, you get priority boarding, tenders, disembarkation, etc.

 

im am definitely NOT against  traveling with friends of family. i do it often and enjoy the process. It's just surprise friends may not get the same goodies as you.  

 

Again - why are you placing an obligation on the original person to "give up" their perks because of an uninvited (or rather unannounced) last minute add-on guest? I assure you, we've traveled with non-Haven guests when we've been in Haven. Maybe you think we're evil and cruel, but having that private place to go away from some of our travel companions is nice. They know we'll be doing some meals without them. They know they can't come to our fancy pool/sundeck area. They know they can't just pop by our room to knock on our door. 

 

That last Prima trip with our 'entire neighborhood' we were the only ones in Haven, and it was fine. We had breakfast in our room each morning while the rest of the gang did whatever they wanted whenever they wanted. We ate dinner in the Haven restaurant, they ate at the buffet. We went to the Haven pool, they went to the main pool. They didn't expect us to 'give up' our perks that we had paid for, and we didn't feel obligated to do so either.

 

 

45 minutes ago, slavetoabunny said:

 Exactly.  None of the people I know would book Haven and I would feel compelled to dine with them in the MDR.

That's on you. If your guests knew you were booked in Haven, and surprised you but chose to not book Haven - that's on them. They know you won't be able to see them often, I assure you, they're probably fine with it. No need to feel obligated to hang in gen pop because of someone who was just trying to do something nice.

[complawyer]

i hear you loud and clear, it's just i would suffer extreme guilt if my friends couldnt join me in some venues. i know it's silly, but that doesnt take away the guilt if they booked to surprise me and we couldnt do some things together.

 

i couldnt fully enjoy my eggs benedict, avocado toast and my glass of champagne, if i knew my friends were in a long,long looongg line at the buffet (LOL)

[schmoopie17]

Why, oh why is everyone clutching their Pearls (or their Jades, Jewels and even Epics) about the possibility that the surprisees may be in the Haven?? Maybe your friends are Haven types, but I know our friends and they are strictly steerage (like us). Even if they were in the Haven, so what? If your friends are Havenites and you're not, then don't surprise them. Or surprise them and live with the fact that you won't be attached to them every waking moment. We don't cruise with friends and follow them around the entire time like lost puppies.

 

But seeing the look of surprise/glee/shock when your life-long friends see you is worth it. If they then decide to go camp out in the Haven, fine. We're still on a cruise and will make the best of it...as we always do, even when we cruise alone.

 

The surprise factor is worth it. I guess you'll just have to trust me (or not). Your choice. And YMMV...

[Travelling2Some]

There is a saying to the effect that you don't know someone until you have traveled with them.  We once went to Disney with good friends and things didn't work well because their kids would become exhausted by mid-afternoon while ours were still raring to go.  Another time we had companions who assumed our carefully researched itinerary was up for grabs every morning.  I am a planner and this did not sit well at all.  Another couple wanted to spend a great deal of time lounging around the hotel pool and would act hurt if we went sightseeing.  Differences in travel style and energy levels and daily habits can make for incompatible travel companions no matter how much you truly like each other. 

 

If you have great travel buddies that is wonderful but our experiences so far have made us cautious.

[graphicguy]

3 hours ago, Travelling2Some said:

There is a saying to the effect that you don't know someone until you have traveled with them.  We once went to Disney with good friends and things didn't work well because their kids would become exhausted by mid-afternoon while ours were still raring to go.  Another time we had companions who assumed our carefully researched itinerary was up for grabs every morning.  I am a planner and this did not sit well at all.  Another couple wanted to spend a great deal of time lounging around the hotel pool and would act hurt if we went sightseeing.  Differences in travel style and energy levels and daily habits can make for incompatible travel companions no matter how much you truly like each other. 

 

If you have great travel buddies that is wonderful but our experiences so far have made us cautious.

Have traveled and cruised with family.  Just did a family outing for 2 weeks in Europe....AFTER I had sailed for 11 days through the Mediterranean.  I was in the Haven.  They (and I) wished they could be with me, schedules didn't align.  No issues.  Enjoyed my trip solo and enjoyed the trip where we were together.  The surprise portion was I threw a birthday party for my sister at a local restaurant in the Tuscan town we were staying.  She loved the surprise and I enjoyed hosting it.

 

I've had people I had sailed with in the past recognize and approach me on subsequent cruises and I always loved running into them, again (and feeling a little guilty I didn't recognize them).  Have met fellow CC-ers on cruises and always enjoyed spending time with them.

 

Bottom line, I do like being with people who enjoy our mutual love of cruising.

[Firstin87]

Yes!  Just because you are friends doesn't mean you would be good travel companions.  Some people dine at different times, some people like to disembark early and other like to sleep in, some like bus tour excursions and some like adventurous ones.  I'd only travel with friends if we planned it in advance and were clear about expectations.  A bad travel experience can harm a friendship, so I'd be careful not to risk that.

[Sugar Magnolia]

1 hour ago, graphicguy said:

Have traveled and cruised with family.  Just did a family outing for 2 weeks in Europe....AFTER I had sailed for 11 days through the Mediterranean.  I was in the Haven.  They (and I) wished they could be with me, schedules didn't align.  No issues.  Enjoyed my trip solo and enjoyed the trip where we were together.  The surprise portion was I threw a birthday party for my sister at a local restaurant in the Tuscan town we were staying.  She loved the surprise and I enjoyed hosting it.

 

I've had people I had sailed with in the past recognize and approach me on subsequent cruises and I always loved running into them, again (and feeling a little guilty I didn't recognize them).  Have met fellow CC-ers on cruises and always enjoyed spending time with them.

 

Bottom line, I do like being with people who enjoy our mutual love of cruising.

Agree, and none of us have any expectations about how much time we would spend together. If the schedule and interests match, then great. If not, then we will catch you at the bar or watch you sing karaoke. 
 

[amarvel]

Surprising an established travel friend or a friend who already asked you to travel is very different than random friend/neighbor or family member sneaking onto a cruise as a surprise.

[Sailing12Away]

21 hours ago, complawyer said:

i couldnt fully enjoy my eggs benedict, avocado toast and my glass of champagne, if i knew my friends were in a long,long looongg line at the buffet (LOL)

Order 2, and tell your friends what time to join you in your cabin for breakfast as you drop your butler an extra $20. Honestly, this isn't rocket science here.

 

On Prima I had called the butler in the morning one day and ordered a bunch of different lunch items for our cabin to be delivered later in the day. The biggest issue was shuffling bodies and taking turns eating as the table in the cabin barely fit 2 people despite our cabin being able to hold much more if we had booked it full.

[olemissreb]

6 hours ago, Travelling2Some said:

There is a saying to the effect that you don't know someone until you have traveled with them.  We once went to Disney with good friends and things didn't work well because their kids would become exhausted by mid-afternoon while ours were still raring to go.  Another time we had companions who assumed our carefully researched itinerary was up for grabs every morning.  I am a planner and this did not sit well at all.  Another couple wanted to spend a great deal of time lounging around the hotel pool and would act hurt if we went sightseeing.  Differences in travel style and energy levels and daily habits can make for incompatible travel companions no matter how much you truly like each other. 

 

If you have great travel buddies that is wonderful but our experiences so far have made us cautious.

My sister and I found out the hard way, that while we can travel together, staying in the same rental is not for us because our families were so different. So when we vacationed together, each family would get their own rental, but we'd get together throughout the week to hang out or do things...worked great. We all got to do what we wanted as individual families, but our kids also got to spend quality time together.  Now she and I are going on a cruise in March '25 with our boyfriends and while sis and I are going to a couple things together and we'll do at least one excursion as a group, we'll be doing our own excursions too and then getting together at night to share what we did. Best of all worlds. 

 

I would not have any problems "surprising" friends or relatives and just doing our own thing and maybe getting together for drinks to share what we did.