Are you always nice or are pretending to be nice on a cruise?

[Thoth]

I have been on 5 cruises, 3 on HAL including the graceful Oosterdam last month. When on board a ship just about everybody is so very nice to me. I get to wondering is this real? Are these people being themselves, you know the same as the other 51 weeks out of the year? It's like once I get off the ship, people change everywhere I go.

Speaking for myself, I am a shy & very private person, but get me on ship and I find a gregarious side which stays buried most of the time. I talk to everybody with ease and I even enjoy playing Elvis in the Great Pretenders Lip-sync show.

It would seem that cruising fullfills some pschological niche in our lives which deals with interpersonal trust and fear of showing inner weakness. In one of the Chicken Soup for the Soul books there is this story about the Golden Budda hidden in the clay model. The story goes that each of us has a Golden Budda which is our true nature but we hide this true beauty from the world becouse we feel vulnerable. The ugly clay outside is what the world sees becouse that is what we show them.

Then again maybe all this analogy is nonsense and nice people simply love to cruise and all miscreants hate cruise ship vacations?

[ekerr19]

I talk to everyone! My DH can't believe how many people I get to know on a cruise ship :)

[bombero]

I'd like to think that people are nice to each other every day, but in my life time I've found that's not the case.. I'd prefer that most people would pretend to be nice, as long as they were nice for 7 days... Bombero

[Orcrone]

I'm not quite as philosophical. I do tend to think I'm probably a bit nicer while on a cruise. But it's just because most of the normal stress situations (work, shopping, cooking, cleaning, taking care of the yard, etc.) are all 1000 miles away.

[kms18]

I know I am nicer on a cruise. I am having so much fun I will talk to anyone. My DH hates when I do that.

[clopaw]

As I've gotten older, I find that I talk to strangers in all sorts of situations. It's the kind of thing that is soooo embarrassing for teenagers when their parents do it. And I think, IMHO, that I'm pretty nice almost all of the time.

[jhannah]

... most of the normal stress situations (work, shopping, cooking, cleaning, taking care of the yard, etc.) are all 1000 miles away.

I believe this is the key. We're escaping completely (with apologies to Princess Cruises ;) ) so our barriers are lowered and we're anticipating a pleasant experience. Most folks aboard HAL ships, from my experience, know their barrier lowering limits and don't digress to the level of spring break antics.

[FlorenceItaly]

I talk to anyone, and everyone while cruising, and at home :).

 

Marie

[Orcrone]

As I've gotten older, I find that I talk to strangers in all sorts of situations. It's the kind of thing that is soooo embarrassing for teenagers when their parents do it. And I think, IMHO, that I'm pretty nice almost all of the time.

Embarrassing teenagers is enough motivation in itself.:D

[localady]

Embarrassing teenagers is enough motivation in itself.:D

I am sure that I embarass my kids regardless of whether I talk or not!!:eek: (I think it's a teenage thing!) I tend to talk to anyone, anytime, and am generally gregarious by nature! I really don't try to embarass them, but as we all know we parents just get "dumber and dumber" during the teenage years!!!:rolleyes:

[sail7seas]

Heck No.....if someone peeves me on a cruise, I'll get just as annoyed as I would at home. Maybe it might take a bit more to peeve me, though??

[iluvcruzin]

I find most people who cruise are in a festive mood and are very happy to be onboard. I'm the opposite of shy. It traces back even to Kindergarten where I had "talks too much" listed on behavior. LOL..

 

I enjoy talking to fellow passengers and meeting new aquaintenaces. This is one of the reasons I prefer a large table in the dining room.

[dakrewser]

A cruise gives you the opportunity to be dropped into a "small town" with little pre-history. You can re-invent yourself as you'd like without, as Orcrone noted, "... most of the normal stress situations (work, shopping, cooking, cleaning, taking care of the yard, etc.)"

 

For just a little while, you can be whoever you'd like to be.

[kryos]

I'd like to think that people are nice to each other every day, but in my life time I've found that's not the case.. I'd prefer that most people would pretend to be nice, as long as they were nice for 7 days... Bombero

LOL ... but I honestly don't think people are "playing nice" on a cruise ship. I think it's genuine even if they aren't normally that nice.

 

Speaking for myself, it would seem that something about being on a cruise ship just brings out the niceness in everybody. The environment is relaxed and that just makes people genuinely friendly and easy to talk to.

 

Guess the solution is to cruise 52 weeks a year? :)

 

I only wish. :)

 

Blue skies ...

 

--rita

[saltydog28]

I don't think you can pretend to be nice. I think that it is something that is inbred. Like when you hold the door, or tell an elderly cruiser how fine they look on formal night.

Just don't let me get behind the wheel and steer that ship, you might hear some colorful phrases.

Take care,

Pat.

[lipoppop]

A cruise gives you the opportunity to be dropped into a "small town" with little pre-history. You can re-invent yourself as you'd like without, as Orcrone noted, "... most of the normal stress situations (work, shopping, cooking, cleaning, taking care of the yard, etc.)"

 

For just a little while, you can be whoever you'd like to be.

 

 

And leave the baggage at home. :)

[Krazy Kruizers]

:)

 

We have found that when the crew is friendly, so are we. And we end up talking a lot more.

Wish everyone in life could be friendly - or at least take a positive look at life and try to be happy.

:)

[Tatka]

As I've gotten older, I find that I talk to strangers in all sorts of situations. It's the kind of thing that is soooo embarrassing for teenagers when their parents do it. And I think, IMHO, that I'm pretty nice almost all of the time.

Specially in my case...when my son's Mom has a strong accent. :o

 

Oh well, I hope he will somehow excuse me ;) ...I just can't stop.

 

Last year my DH didn't cruise with us and I thought I would feel very lonely (as my son of course spent very little time with me). By the end of the cruise I felt like I have tons of new friends.:) ( I noticed that cruises bring people closer than on land vacations)

[ASM]

I think I'm the same. Nice 99.99% of the time! I also talk to people although I actually seem to do more listening than talking. On the surface I make friends easily. Really I'm rather reserved and a private person.

[Orcrone]

:mad: I don't pretend to be nice. I just stay nasty all the time.:mad:

[jhannah]

Somehow, I seriously doubt that! Now, other people .........

[cactuslady]

Thoth raises an interesting question. When I met my DH on the Ryndam, what struck me was he was so NICE to everybody (not just me). Naturally, I wondered if he would be different on shore. We just had our first anniversary, and (so far ;) ) he's turned out to be the world's sweetest guy. :D

 

Hope this piece of anecdotal evidence helps in your scientific study.

[jazzsea]

I'm pretty nice all the time. Although the last few months have been pretty stressful. You may have noticed me on this board more often. The board actually reminds me of being on a cruise or getting ready for a cruise.

 

The involvement and interaction cheers me and I like to offer information for those that have questions.

 

On a ship I am more quiet than at home. I'm pretty shy. DH is fairly outgoing. I talk on the phone all day (booking cruises, answering questions, dealing with HAL). Sometimes I just like the peace and quiet of a cruise. Unless it is one of my groups, no one expects me to do anything for them. It is not "showtime" everytime I leave my cabin.

 

I love to cruise and I love the spirit and atmosphere of a cruise. Most cruise passengers board the ship expecting to have a good time. Their attitude makes it wonderful for the rest of us.

 

I don't expect to have a good time..... I KNOW I will have a good time. Isn't that one of the real joys of cruising?

[Smiles]

I'd like to think I am the same person whether on or off the ship. But I have reason for pause, when thinking of my last cruise. My hubby and I were very outgoing and jovial at our assigned dinners when meeting fellow cruisers. We enjoyed sharing ourselves and having a good time; even though we both tend to be shy (my hubby more than me). Well, one morning I convinced him to go to the dinning room for breakfast rather than the buffet. I must admit, it felt rather stiffling. Perhaps it was because it was a table for 12, rather than 6; perhaps because we were the last couple seated at the table, and the others seemed to be at least a "group" of 8 who had travelled together. But I admit, that there were forced smiles and stiffled talks. I felt like I was being interrogated rather than having a pleasant breakfast (i.e., what do you do for a living, how many children, no children, why not?) My hubby who is already shy, and who I have learned to accept doesn't talk in the morning, was pleasant, but uncomfortable. Needless to say, it was our last breakfast in the dinning room. Yeah, we are always (at least try to be) nice and pleasant. But sometimes, it isn't always natural.

 

One thing is natural, we always have a good time on a cruise.

[RuthC]

It's easy to be nicer than we normally are when we're cruising. As others have said---what's there not to be nice about?

 

But I also think we're on our " best behavior", too. It's not hard to be polite to everyone, to hold our tongues, to be excruciatingly correct for 7-10 days. It's a little harder when the cruise lengthens, though! When cruises go 2-3 weeks and more I find that people start to let their hair down and become more themselves.

Now, this is not a bad thing. I rather enjoy it when I can get to know my fellow travelers on a more complex level. But there is a definite change.