For a DL flyer (the airline that never has any delays, even for weather, or so I hear) you did pretty well.
PlusPoints are earned only by Platinum, 1K, and GS fliers, and they may be applied to request an upgrade. Anyone who has these would be placed on the complimentary premier upgrade (CPU) list for domestic flights, so they wouldn't need to use them. I think though you are just talking about MileagePlus miles.
For UA "preferred seats" (the ones with the black triangle) are the same as regular economy seats; they are just closer to the front. I would never waste my money on them, and unless you have a basic economy ticket, you may choose them at no charge at 24 hours when you check in if any are available. Economy Plus is not considered an upgrade, the fare class is still just economy.
Lois, I am not familiar with Capitol One, so have no idea if you can transfer your miles into your UA Mileage Plus account. I also am not sure what you mean by "upgrade." If you pull up your reservation in the app or at united.com, and go to "manage trip" there will be an option that says "upgrade cabin." Note, this is only to upgrade, on your flight anyway, from economy to first. If it's offered, it will give you the price or miles required, if an upgrade is offered. Sometimes, it will clear immediately, but often you will be waitlisted, and you'll just have to wait and see if your upgrade clears.
If you would just like to purchase an economy plus seat (as long as you did not buy a basic economy ticket), just pull up the seat map and click on the seat you are interested in (they are blue on the map) and it will show you the price in money or miles for that seat.