Do you enjoy "making conversation" with assigned tablemates on cruises?

[Steve_Red_Dog]

For us, sharing our experiences everyday around the dinner table is one of the highlights of every cruise. Only once have we had "disappointing" table mates, and the other couple at the table made up for the other three.

[cb at sea]

I LOVE tablemates! It's fun! It makes coming to dinner an adventure! So far, we've never had a problem with ANY tablemate....maybe, we're just easy to get along with....but we've enjoyed all of our encounters!

 

Dinner is not just a time to stuff your face....it's a social time, and having folks to chat with is great. Hubby and I spend 99% of our daytime hours together on a cruise...for 2 hours at dinner, we can certainly talk to others....AND, it gives us something to talk about later...yes...you will discuss your tablemates in private later...and that's fun and fine. We've met some interesting folks, and gotten to see their "suite" accomodations (yes...this is a good way to do an informal cabin crawl!!!), had them join us for shows....if you haven't done it...give it a try. It's the highlight of our day! We LIKE being friendly!

[johneeo]

Have we talked with tablemates at dinner? Sure.

Do we enjoy it? Oh God, no!

 

We aren't out to make friends, and we don't like being "forced" to talk with specific people.

 

The last 5 or so cruises we've requested a table for two. That way we can avoid it.

 

By sparing others of your company, you are doing them a great favor.

 

I commend you.

[margeecruiser]

The big, noisy, fun tables at dinner is one of the highlights of our cruises and the main reason we like cruising so much. It is sort of like sitting on the front porch instead of your own backyard or sitting ourside your RV and striking up conversation with those walking by. We have friends who absolutely hate mixing with people they do not know, so they like a table for 2 and do not converse with others unless they have to. Everyone has their own personal style and to each, his own.

 

Hope to see any one of you at dinner! I'll be the one laughing and having a ball!

 

Margee:D

[pampaul]

We've been on 5 cruises so far and never had tablemates, other than the people we were traveling with. There will be 7 of us (4 adults/3 teenaged boys) on the Disney Fantasy next month, so I don't see any tablemates in our future there.

 

But then hubby & I will be on the Holland America Veendam in August. Not sure if he's looking to get a table for two or if we should chance it and sit with others. How does that work anyhow? When you go into a restaurant on the first night, do you say there's two people but would like to sit with strangers? LOL

[room010]

If table mates are as varied, interesting, crazy, smart, amusing with strangers at dinner as they are with strangers on this board there'd be no excuse for any awkwardness. We opt for anytime dining anyway depending on timing and mood so some nights it's a quiet table for 2 and others we take a large table and take pot luck. 9/10 it pays off and adds to the enjoyment of cruising for us.

[SuitCaseBears]

I don't know why anyone who DOESN'T like to talk to table-mates wouldn't just always cruise on a cruise line where they can get a table for 2 or however many they are all the time. It's a vacation for heaven's sake, don't do what you don't like to do.

 

My husband and I like it both ways (that sounds funny). So when we're not with a large group, we do anytime dining and sometimes ask to be alone and sometime ask for a table of 6 or more. We've found only one other couple is often strained, but with at least 6 people we've never had it drag.

 

We have had it be strange, but even that can be fun because then after dinner we go have a drink alone and laugh about everything that happened at dinner. We figure dinner will either be fun in and of itself or will provide hours of entertainment later, and when we regale our friends with stories when we come home. Either way, we enjoy ourselves.

[margeecruiser]

Room 010 -- right on! The people on this board are so funny, interesting, varied, opinionated (good and bad), smart, educated, admirable (some of the personal, health-related and family-related discussions are sad and uplifting at the same time). I feel as if I know some of these posters, but I have never met them and most probably, never will. I trust the advice I get here more than I do people in my little town because the people here have the experience to get it to me straight.

 

That's why I love this board and cruising!

 

Margee

[luvscruising2007]

We have been very fortunate with our table mates and continue to ask for large tables.

Having said that, I hate the first night. Very awkward for everyone. But, after that initial meeting, I look forward to seeing them the next night. I have also found that there is generally at least one person who has a strong personality and will bring others into the conversation.

I actually lack confidence and worry about the impression I will make. But, I counteract that by asking questions. I would much rather listen to someone else talk about their experiences and I can sit back and relax.

[fleckle]

........so...Do you enjoy "making conversation" with assigned tablemates on cruises? Tell us about your successes and disasters!

We have not had "assigned tablemates" on cruises for a long time as we prefer to book open-select-anytime dining, or whatever a cruise line calls it. Sometimes we request a table just for ourselves, and other times ask to be seated with others.

 

But when dining with others, we request a medium-sized table. We have trouble following conversations at large tables when the dining room is noisy and we hate needing to ask people to repeat what they said.

 

We have met some very nice people that way, some conversations more interesting than others, but don't recall any real disasters. About the worst was being seated with someone who did not speak English. Since we provincial Americans do not know any language other than our own, we were unable to communicate and could only nod and smile.

 

We especially enjoy being seated with Australians. Somehow they always manage to liven up any table, even though they speak another language. ;)

[rdsqrl]

We have been very fortunate with our table mates and continue to ask for large tables.

Having said that, I hate the first night. Very awkward for everyone. But, after that initial meeting, I look forward to seeing them the next night. I have also found that there is generally at least one person who has a strong personality and will bring others into the conversation.

I actually lack confidence and worry about the impression I will make. But, I counteract that by asking questions. I would much rather listen to someone else talk about their experiences and I can sit back and relax.

So true! It reminds me of the first day of classes! I always get a bit nervous walking down to the dining room. Fortunately, however, I've almost always had good luck with tablemates, and love Traditional Dining for that very reason. To me, Anytime Dining is like repeating that nerve-wracking first night again and again and again.

[EmiGirl826]

This is one of my favorite parts of a cruise! I LOE meeting new people and I'm pretty good at being able to find something to talk about with anyone as long as they have half of a brain. lol

[BlueRiband]

...Do you enjoy "making conversation" with assigned tablemates on cruises? Tell us about your successes and disasters!

 

Absolutely! Meeting different people is one of the joys of going on a ship! What can be so hard about starting small talk? Asking if a table mate has sailed on ship x before, what makes them keep coming back to line y, etc., are natural conversation starting points in this setting. Once people start to recall past voyages, or what they hope to enjoy on their first, it will just lead into other topics of mutual interest.

 

Last fall I was able to discuss hot-button political topics with some British table mates. (Our political elections don't affect them - nor do theirs affect us.)

[donaldsc]

Depends upon the tablemates. As I am sure that dome of them feel about me.

 

DON

[Putterdude]

DW and I are retired and empty nesters and I understand that some couples like to be left alone. However, in our case we have dinner with one another 300 evenings a year so we quite enjoy sitting down with other people for dinner.:)

[Nebr.cruiser]

I'm not great at conversation at best and am a little shy. I do enjoy talking with table mates, to a degree. It helps me that my dh is very comfortable and good at talking to others, and not at all shy So I don't have to carry the load. We make a good team.

 

I do enjoy listening to and responding to others, but I am not very good at keeping things going. Wish I was!

[Cruisin' Chick]

I'm the shy one in the couple, but I've found that having the same tablemates during the course of a cruise really does add positively to the experience. Once you get past the first night questions (Where are you from, Is this your first cruise, etc), you can move on to "What did you do today?," "What did you do in port?" type of questions from then on. It's a nice way to vicariously enjoy the cruise from the others' point of view and share your experiences too. And we can meet others onboard at the open seatings at lunch and at activities.

 

When we took the Coast Starlight train up the west coast in 2004, there was three of us, so at meals a single person was always seated with us. And each time, these passengers would have interesting stories to tell about their travels.

[LICRUISEAHOLICS]

My husband and I have been on 20+ cruises and I'd have to say its a toss up. We have enjoyed great conversation with people from around the world and even around the block from our house! (totally a coincidence)

I always make sure to extend the greeting and pleasantries first and try some small talk. But I always want to respect the fact some people

prefer to be more to themselves. One memorable cruise we had a table of 10. We missed the first night and wondered why the second night there was only one couple there. We quickly figured it out. The husband was a know it all professor who was an expert on everything from wine to travel to politics ! OMG. Let's just say that was our last meal with them - we asked to be seated elsewhere. :)

We have also had a few tables for 2 which we truly enjoyed. But frankly if we are traveling alone with out family or friends it's nice to enjoy dinner with fellow passengers and pass some time.

[tip]

No, I don't like it at all and that's why I prefer anytime dining and ask for a table for just me and the person(s) I am cruising with. Some people like the social aspects of cruising and dinner, but I don't cruise for that.

 

Nor do I!;)

[wwcruisers]

For us, it's been a mixed bag. Over the years, we've become close friends (and cruised again with) folks that we met at dinner. We've almost always hit it off with the people we found ourselves seated with in the MDR. When we travel in a group of family or friends, however, we do ask to be seated with just our group.

 

That being said, our last cruise was the first time we've ever asked to be moved to another table. First night, we were seated at a table for eight. One couple did not show up, and the other two couples (who did not know us or each other) both showed up late. One gentleman was obviously hanging on to that last puff of tobacco, right up 'till they pulled his chair out for him -- yuck! All of us were experienced cruisers, and I thought that we'd have a lot to talk about. Well, no such luck. Both of the men decided to start talking politics, and persisted -- even when we politely demurred, and tried to gently steer the conversation back to travel and cruising. DH and I exchanged a couple of meaningful looks, and graciously excused ourselves before dessert. We went straight upstairs to the desk of the maitre-d, and requested to be re-assigned. He found us a nice two-top (on the other side of the MDR), and we had a great cruise!

[jamessemaj]

I enjoy conversation on cruises. Even the bores can be interesting to me. The only people I don't care to be around are those who have no interest in others and their thoughts and company.

 

Those are the real bores to me, and it is good for them to hunker down in their private space and tables for 1 or 2. In their case, the feeling is mutual with me and I don't waste time on them as I know they view common socializing as an infringement. They are easy to spot.

[momtoabowhead]

Honestly, I prefer to eat dinner alone. We had great table mates for our honeymoon but I prefer not to eat with strangers. Just my personal preference.

[wassup4565]

For the people who say they are shy, let me recommend this technique. Everyone loves a good listener, so all you have to do is ask gentle questions, and sit back and listen to what others say. By gentle questions, I mean those that don't put people on the spot.

 

We've never found anyone uninteresting at a dining table. We may have sometimes silently disagreed with their views, but by asking gentle questions, we always learned more about why they had those views and often came to see another way of looking at things, even if we still didn't agree.

 

I thought I had actually hit the wall with this approach on a trip with my adult daughter, when she asked a couple where they came from and what they did. They answered simply that they were missionaries, and I thought my eyes would roll back in my head. I just didn't want to have that conversation. I was so wrong! My daughter persisted, drawing them out with questions about where they were working, and this is the story came out. They had been stationed in Haiti shortly after the earthquake, and their church had sent them on a much-needed cruise week to refresh themselves after several months. We learned an incredible amount about the conditions in the country, Haitian society, and the efforts to help the country recover. Never would have had that conversation if not for my wise daughter.

 

As Henry James wrote, "Never think you know the last word about any human heart."

[MiamiSpartan]

We love it!

That is one of the things we love about cruising! We are both very social people, and are both in sales for work, so we are used to socializing with strangers....

[Snorkel Dawg]

We enjoy meeting fun new people, so yes we do like having tablemates.