Gift for room steward

[sloopsailor]

Perhaps you are not sentimental but some crew members may actually appreciate a small token of a guest's appreciation along with their cash tip?

 

The key word is "may". It could just as easily be "may not". Why even take the chance? Isn't giving them cash a much better guarantee that they "WILL" appreciate it? Why even take the chance that you will be throwing away what you give them. How in the world does having to throw something away benefit the crew members in any way?

 

I am of the opinion that giving trinkets, T-shirts, candy, etc. as gifts is all about the giver's "what a thoughtful person I am" feelings and not for the recipient's benefit. They do so more to be noticed, to satisfy their own egos.

 

Like others have said, giving a gift is supposed to be about the recipient, not about the giver.

 

And, no, I am not sentimental about crew members. They are there to do a job, not to be my best friends. It is a business arrangement, and absolutely nothing else. The minute the next group of passengers come on board you will be forgotten. Unless, of course, you made a point of standing out by giving them something that they had absolutely no use for, causing them think "What the heck was that passenger thinking?"

Edited July 27, 2015 by sloopsailor

[sail7seas]

 

<snip>

 

 

And, no, I am not sentimental about crew members. They are there to do a job, not to be my best friends. It is a business arrangement, and absolutely nothing else. The minute the next group of passengers come on board you will be forgotten. Unless, of course, you made a point of standing out by giving them something that they had absolutely no use for, causing them think "What the heck was that passenger thinking?"

 

 

 

Or gave such a generous cash tip it stood out as memorable. :)

[PoppyandNana]

R

This thread has gotten so wonky that it's has my head spinning.:eek:

 

Biker; "I have given a dozen or so Harley t-shirts to crew I KNOW. They want them".

 

Can you not see the difference in this "discussion"? When this subject comes up, all you have to say is, you've made many friends over the years and know what they want or like. Given that most do not have the relationship with them that you do, it's probably better to just give cash. If you clarify from the get go, most likely there won't be barbs thrown back and forth and no arguing. :)

 

Dozen or so? Assuming you give one to your steward and assistant, one each to waiter and assistant waiter that leaves 8 "or so". Who gets the other eight? Of course you're convinced your steward wants one.

 

You're telling me you have made such solid friendships with bartenders, ships photographers, pursers desk and engine room people that they all "want them" and treasure your Harley tee shirts? Do you know the definition of "friends"? Friends invite each over for events, birthday parties, BBQs and the like. I assume you have been over to Indonesia for your room stewards 30th birthday? How was last Labor Day when your waiter flew to Michigan or wherever you live for your big bash?

 

I could see where one might possibly see a room steward on subsequent cruises but unless significant effort was made with thie ship's hotel management how would you be in a cabin serviced by that steward? Or at the same MDR table where your "friend " works?

 

Unless you sail on the same ship, every week, I don't buy your story you have formed such lasting friendships on cruise ships that the recipients of your Harley shirts want and treasure them.

 

Me think you are living so far down the land of denial that you can't see the forest for the trees.

Edited July 27, 2015 by PoppyandNana

[sloopsailor]

Or gave such a generous cash tip it stood out as memorable. :)

 

LOL! Now that is one "ego" stroking action I will applaud! ;)

[Harry and Lucille]

As small as any inside cabin. Bunk beds for two. Just room enough for family stuff. Picture of the wife, husband, kids. Personal room decorating (as much as will fit to make it feel homey and comfortable to them). No room for other stuff given to them by passengers. They are there to work and do their job. For WHAT? MONEY.

 

Most of them send that money home to support their family. Low wages, even if there is work, in their country. Again. Cash is the gift that is remembered.:cool:

[iheartbda]

R

 

Dozen or so? Assuming you give one to your steward and assistant, one each to waiter and assistant waiter that leaves 8 "or so". Who gets the other eight? Of course you're convinced your steward wants one.

 

You're telling me you have made such solid friendships with bartenders, ships photographers, pursers desk and engine room people that they all "want them" and treasure your Harley tee shirts? Do you know the definition of "friends"? Friends invite each over for events, birthday parties, BBQs and the like. I assume you have been over to Indonesia for your room stewards 30th birthday? How was last Labor Day when your waiter flew to Michigan or wherever you live for your big bash?

 

I could see where one might possibly see a room steward on subsequent cruises but unless significant effort was made with thie ship's hotel management how would you be in a cabin serviced by that steward? Or at the same MDR table where your "friend " works?

 

Unless you sail on the same ship, every week, I don't buy your story you have formed such lasting friendships on cruise ships that the recipients of your Harley shirts want and treasure them.

 

Me think you are living so far down the land of denial that you can't see the forest for the trees.

 

And me thinks YOU can't see the forest for the trees.:D

 

Obviously, you seemed to have missed that I quoted Biker@Sea so my post was then meant for him.

 

We have no intimate, lasting friendship with any crew but we do treat them with respect. We keep our auto gratuities in place and tip EXTRA CASH to at least the cabin steward, waiter, assistant waiter, maître d' and possibly others.

[notentirelynormal]

Okay, I'm going to add something more to this thread.

 

Over the years we have made friends with crew members. When they "served" us, when we first met them we, of course, tipped them. Then we sailed again and enjoyed each other's company. For a while we lived in Vancouver. We would go down to the ship and take them (our ex room steward and some friends) for the limited time they had around Vancouver. They got to see the city through a locals eyes and more than they could have done on their own. It was only an hour or so but it was a fun time for all.

 

Another crew member (M'D) we went down and visited every week when the ship was in port. We would hang out with him and the head waiters until his work was done then off we would go. We were there so much that some of the crew thought we were his wife and kids. My DH thought that was funny. Yes, he came to our house. We knew him for over 20 years. The only t-shirt I ever gave him was when he saw my Phantom of the Opera shirt and asked if I could find him one too. We had been friends for about 10 years.

 

Another crew member (waiter) has been to our house in Vancouver and Los Angeles. He called and wrote often. We never ever gave him gifts except of our time. Okay, we cooked him dinner LOL. He did stay with us for 3 days.

 

We have had crew members call our house from all over the world just to say hi. Never, ever gave them any gifts except our time.

 

Those are friend relationships. No trinkets, shirts or anything else was needed. Just good times together.

 

The biggest gift you can give them other than money and a good reference comment is treating them like an equal.

 

I'll never forgot our one room steward when we were talking kids (we were traveling with our grandkids) and he mentioned his family. I asked him if he had kids. Yes, he did. Do you have a picture. Yes. Can I see it. Really? You really want to see a picture of my kids? Yes. I'll be back in 5 minutes. Off he ran back to his cabin to get the picture and proudly show us pictures of his family. Who do you think he'll remember most? Me, who took a genuine interest in his family or the guy that left him a box of chocolates or a t-shirt?

[PoppyandNana]

And me thinks YOU can't see the forest for the trees.:D

 

Obviously, you seemed to have missed that I quoted Biker@Sea so my post was then meant for him.

 

We have no intimate, lasting friendship with any crew but we do treat them with respect. We keep our auto gratuities in place and tip EXTRA CASH to at least the cabin steward, waiter, assistant waiter, maître d' and possibly others.

 

My apologies. My post was intended for Biker@sea. Sorry for the confusion

Edited July 27, 2015 by PoppyandNana

[iheartbda]

Notentirelynormal, great stories.:)

 

Now I am going to admit to a deep dark secret.....I once gave some useless trinkets. A number of years ago when we cruised on Celebrity they would have the parade of Baked Alaska in the MDR and all the pax would twirl and wave their napkins.

 

The next time, I took different color glow sticks for everyone at our table. Our waiter was intrigued with the sticks so I gave him all the extras I had. The next night he said they played with them in the crew quarters until they stopped glowing.

 

There....I feel so much better after confessing.:D

[iheartbda]

My apologies. My post was intended for Biker@sea. Sorry for the confusion

No harm, no foul.:)

This thread has gotten so crazy that it's hard to follow.

[biker@sea]

R

 

Dozen or so? Assuming you give one to your steward and assistant, one each to waiter and assistant waiter that leaves 8 "or so". Who gets the other eight? Of course you're convinced your steward wants one.

 

You're telling me you have made such solid friendships with bartenders, ships photographers, pursers desk and engine room people that they all "want them" and treasure your Harley tee shirts? Do you know the definition of "friends"? Friends invite each over for events, birthday parties, BBQs and the like. I assume you have been over to Indonesia for your room stewards 30th birthday? How was last Labor Day when your waiter flew to Michigan or wherever you live for your big bash?

 

I could see where one might possibly see a room steward on subsequent cruises but unless significant effort was made with thie ship's hotel management how would you be in a cabin serviced by that steward? Or at the same MDR table where your "friend " works?

 

Unless you sail on the same ship, every week, I don't buy your story you have formed such lasting friendships on cruise ships that the recipients of your Harley shirts want and treasure them.

 

Me think you are living so far down the land of denial that you can't see the forest for the trees.

 

Making friends is not that hard if you try a little.

 

For instance try taking the NCL Philippine history and language course.

 

The majorette of ships hotel workers seam to be Philippinio

 

 

Mangandang umaga = Good morning

Mangandang tanghali = Good afternoon

Mungandang gabi = Good evening

 

Goodbye = Paalam

 

Salamat = thank you

 

alak = Beer

 

This could get you off to a good start.

[sail7seas]

LOL! Now that is one "ego" stroking action I will applaud! ;)

 

Or maybe just generous? :cool:

Have you read/heard on TV about ultra generous tippers in various restaurants, bars etc who just plain liked their server, could afford it and wanted to pass a bit forward? There actually are some people who get pleasure from making others happy or helping them when they know they could use a hand up.

 

It's a shame to put such a negative slant on what might be a very kind gesture. I hope all reading this understand what I mean. :)

 

 

[PoppyandNana]

Or maybe just generous? :cool:

Have you read/heard on TV about ultra generous tippers in various restaurants, bars etc who just plain liked their server, could afford it and wanted to pass a bit forward? There actually are some people who get pleasure from making others happy or helping them when they know they could use a hand up.

 

It's a shame to put such a negative slant on what might be a very kind gesture. I hope all reading this understand what I mean. :)

 

 

 

Know exactly what you mean. Like the guy who left a $2,000 tip to a waitress he had heard was having financial problems and was about to be evicted.

 

I recall two events from my own small world. Out to dinner with two other couples. Nice place, good food, good service. The one couple who tallied the check came up with ten percent tip. We orderd several rounds of drinks, deserts, coffee. I was embarrassed but didn't want to make a scene. I went back to the restaurant the following evening and gave her an additional twenty percent. She started to cry.

 

Another similar situation. At a buffet at an Atlantic City casino. Rule of thumb at buffets is ten percent to the server who brings drinks or coffee. With another couple said you don't tip anything at a buffet. Again, not to make a scene I let it slide. Later that afternoon I stopped by and gave the server a twenty. She gave me a hug. Both of these situations made me feel like a million dollars simply because I righted a wrong and made someone's day.

 

Point here is that the medium that made me feel so good was cash, not a tee shirt, a Canadian pin or,an orange.

Edited July 27, 2015 by PoppyandNana

[sail7seas]

Know exactly what you mean. Like the guy who left a $2,000 tip to a waitress he had heard was having financial problems and was about to be evicted.

 

I recall two events from my own small world. Out to dinner with two other couples. Nice place, good food, good service. The one couple who tallied the check came up with ten percent tip. We orderd several rounds of drinks, deserts, coffee. I was embarrassed but didn't want to make a scene. I went back to the restaurant the following evening and gave her an additional twenty five percent.

 

Another similar situation. At a buffet at an Atlantic City casino. Rule of thumb at buffets is ten percent to the server who brings drinks or coffee. With another couple who said you don't tip anything at a buffet. Again, not to make a scene I let it slide. Later that afternoon I stopped by and gave her a twenty. She started to cry. Now, both of these situations made me feel like a million dollars simply because I righted a wrong and made someone's day.

 

Point here is that the medium that made me feel so good was cash, not a tee shirt, a Canadian pin or,an orange.

 

 

Acts of kindness...... :)

 

I was playing a quarter slot machine one afternoon in casino on HAL ship at sea. There was a young honeymoon couple beside me and they were adorable. Made me feel like a bride again to see her utter joy. They were playing cautiously, feeding a quarter at a time and I heard them promise each other to not play more than they had agreed. :) I had to leave but had quarters in my bucket (back in the days when coins fell into the hoppers :) ) and as I left, I handed the bride the bucket. The look of absolute delight on their faces could never be bought for the maybe $15 that was in that bucket. It is now years later and still gives me pleasure when I remember the happiness they gave me drinking in their newlywed joy.

 

Edited July 27, 2015 by sail7seas

[sloopsailor]

Or maybe just generous? :cool:

Have you read/heard on TV about ultra generous tippers in various restaurants, bars etc who just plain liked their server, could afford it and wanted to pass a bit forward? There actually are some people who get pleasure from making others happy or helping them when they know they could use a hand up.

 

It's a shame to put such a negative slant on what might be a very kind gesture. I hope all reading this understand what I mean. :)

 

 

 

Whoa, there! We're on the same side. I fully agree with you. I was only poking fun at my previous post. :)

 

My wife and I are almost generous to a fault. We have always tipped our service staff extra on every cruise we have been on. Even when it was done only with envelopes. They way we figure, we are doing quite well financially, well enough to be able to cruise every couple of years or so, plus take extended land vacations in between. We know the crew who serve us are mostly from third world countries where the quality of life isn't as good as we enjoy. We know that they make low wages and rely on tips for the bulk of their income. And we know that they aren't there as a charity to serve us, but are trying to earn enough to raise their family's quality of life at home.

 

I would never think of giving some trinkets that may not be of any use to them when I am very certain that the same money spent on those trinkets will be much more useful. That is why we give more than necessary. We can afford it. And are grateful that we can give them more than is required.

Edited July 27, 2015 by sloopsailor

[GUT2407]

Know exactly what you mean. Like the guy who left a $2,000 tip to a waitress he had heard was having financial problems and was about to be evicted.

 

I recall two events from my own small world. Out to dinner with two other couples. Nice place, good food, good service. The one couple who tallied the check came up with ten percent tip. We orderd several rounds of drinks, deserts, coffee. I was embarrassed but didn't want to make a scene. I went back to the restaurant the following evening and gave her an additional twenty percent. She started to cry.

 

Another similar situation. At a buffet at an Atlantic City casino. Rule of thumb at buffets is ten percent to the server who brings drinks or coffee. With another couple said you don't tip anything at a buffet. Again, not to make a scene I let it slide. Later that afternoon I stopped by and gave the server a twenty. She gave me a hug. Both of these situations made me feel like a million dollars simply because I righted a wrong and made someone's day.

 

Point here is that the medium that made me feel so good was cash, not a tee shirt, a Canadian pin or,an orange.

 

 

A wrong?

 

I thought a tip was a gift not an obligation.

 

I applaud what you did, but not the attitude that what someone else chose to to was WRONG.

[PoppyandNana]

A wrong?

 

I thought a tip was a gift not an obligation.

 

I applaud what you did, but not the attitude that what someone else chose to to was WRONG.

 

I have no retort. With an attitude like yours there is no point.

[iheartbda]

A wrong?

 

I thought a tip was a gift not an obligation.

 

I applaud what you did, but not the attitude that what someone else chose to to was WRONG.

Some of us do consider a tip a "gift" for services rendered.

[sail7seas]

Whoa, there! We're on the same side. I fully agree with you. I was only poking fun at my previous post. :)

 

My wife and I are almost generous to a fault. We have always tipped our service staff extra on every cruise we have been on. Even when it was done only with envelopes. They way we figure, we are doing quite well financially, well enough to be able to cruise every couple of years or so, plus take extended land vacations in between. We know the crew who serve us are mostly from third world countries where the quality of life isn't as good as we enjoy. We know that they make low wages and rely on tips for the bulk of their income. And we know that they aren't there as a charity to serve us, but are trying to earn enough to raise their family's quality of life at home.

 

I would never think of giving some trinkets that may not be of any use to them when I am very certain that the same money spent on those trinkets will be much more useful. That is why we give more than necessary. We can afford it. And are grateful that we can give them more than is required.

 

 

What a nice post. :)

 

[sail7seas]

Some of us do consider a tip a "gift" for services rendered.

 

Speaking only for myself, I don't consider a tip to be a gift.

I look at it as augmented wages. It is earned by those who work hard to

provide us with nice service.

 

[iheartbda]

Speaking only for myself, I don't consider a tip to be a gift.

I look at it as augmented wages. It is earned by those who work hard to

provide us with nice service.

 

I meant gift ONLY in reference to the person I quoted. And, as I said, it's for services rendered which they have earned.

Edited July 28, 2015 by iheartbda

[sail7seas]

You're right. I should have read more carefully. :)

[GUT2407]

I meant gift ONLY in reference to the person I quoted. And, as I said, it's for services rendered which they have earned.

 

Gee I call that wages, but then I'm old fashioned.

[brimarl]

Well after reading through all the posts I know two things

Cash is king and now I understand the size of some of the suitcases.. They must be full of gifts for the crew

[iheartbda]

Gee I call that wages, but then I'm old fashioned.

So, does this mean you don't tip because their wages should be paid by the cruise line?