Remarried a Non cruiser and have agreed to only 4 cruises after retirement

[NSnJW]

Assuming they figure out how to bring back the buffets in some form, you never have to dress for dinner on most cruise lines.  I found plenty to eat for my first 5 cruises without ever going to the main dining rooms or specialty restaurants.  Besides the buffets, there are pizza places. burger places. delis. some ships have Mexican or BBQ.  My last few cruises I found someone to eat with in the main dining room and I just wear slacks and a collard shirt  If it is a formal night, I go elsewhere.  I am not wearing a suit for anyone.

[SargassoPirate]

19 hours ago, NSnJW said:

Assuming they figure out how to bring back the buffets in some form, you never have to dress for dinner on most cruise lines.  I found plenty to eat for my first 5 cruises without ever going to the main dining rooms or specialty restaurants.  Besides the buffets, there are pizza places. burger places. delis. some ships have Mexican or BBQ.  My last few cruises I found someone to eat with in the main dining room and I just wear slacks and a collard shirt  If it is a formal night, I go elsewhere.  I am not wearing a suit for anyone.

I did a 21 day solo last winter and only ate in the MDR for breakfasts and lunches.  I went ahead a dressed up a bit for the loyalty lounge in the evening, but skipped the MDR for dinner in favor of a wee dram and some of the music performers in venues around the ship.

 

There is no rule that you have to eat in the MDR for dinner.

[Chas2crews]

On 11/9/2020 at 5:05 PM, olemissreb said:

My first marriage, the ex and I loved to cruise.  Now after 30 years of marriage and 4 years divorced, I'm dating a guy that hates cruises even though he's never been on one! I'm still trying to convince him to give it a try and I think I found the "hook".  He wants to see Alaska, so I suggested at least a 2 week vacation - 1 week inland seeing all kinds of stuff and 1 week on a cruise.  That was one that he seemed amenable to.  His biggest hangup is that he doesn't want to "dress up" for dinner - I'm still working on that one. 😁😇

Ole miss, you sound like the female version of my situation. Good luck in Alaska, and with any luck, he will love it.  I, too, don’t mind the dress up part, and I trust  I will still fit the tux once I retire. 

[iancal]

We stopped 'dressing up' for so called formal nights.  My wife suggested we skip one while on a cruise years ago. We did.  Went to the buffet instead.  We enjoyed it more. Last thing I wanted to do was put on a suit while on vacation let lug one along for weeks of pre or post cruise travel.

 

We have attended a few MDR formal nights since then.  Our impression is that they have gone downhill in terms of food and service.  They are nothing special.   So now our choice is always either the buffet or another alternative venue.  We do not think we are missing anything.   I always wear slacks and a collared shirt.  Even though that is fine for formal nights on many lines we still skip the MDR on those nights by choice.

 

 

 

 

Edited November 20, 2020 by iancal

[iancal]

On 10/19/2020 at 12:51 PM, Chas2crews said:

Great point, Ian.  I am planning to front load as much as I can once retired, and then reassess what other travel.  The four planned cruises I will hopefully get a lot out of in those first couple of years not punching the clock.  

We started our retirement by selling our home, downsizing to a storage container, and travelling for seven months followed by three months of furnished condo rentals.   That started us off.  

 

Since then it has been two 2 month international trips a year plus some shorter ones in between.   We both had, and still have, long bucket lists of places we want to visit and revisit.  We do warm climates in the winter to get away from the cold.   I have no doubt that at some point health issues will compel us to do more cruising and less independent land travel.

 

Since downsizing and traveling more often we find that our focus in retirement has switched from 'things' to experiences.  Serious downsizing helped.

[firefly333]

On 10/19/2020 at 1:51 PM, Chas2crews said:

Great point, Ian.  I am planning to front load as much as I can once retired, and then reassess what other travel.  The four planned cruises I will hopefully get a lot out of in those first couple of years not punching the clock.  

Galapagos islands would be on my 4 must do bucket list. I think only 3 lines go there, celebrity, silversea and I forget the other. I was looking at celebrity just because my loyalty level transfers, though now that celebrity is doing kinda inclusive, loyalty doesnt matter. Celebrity only has suites on their specially built ship doing Galapagos. Silver sea too much $$$ for my budget. Celebrity high enough.

 

Panama transit, check, how about around the horn or Antarctica.. my relative wants a special birding cruise to Antarctica. Some islands I'd like to do.

[Chas2crews]

On 11/24/2020 at 2:42 PM, firefly333 said:

Galapagos islands would be on my 4 must do bucket list. I think only 3 lines go there, celebrity, silversea and I forget the other. I was looking at celebrity just because my loyalty level transfers, though now that celebrity is doing kinda inclusive, loyalty doesnt matter. Celebrity only has suites on their specially built ship doing Galapagos. Silver sea too much $$$ for my budget. Celebrity high enough.

 

Panama transit, check, how about around the horn or Antarctica.. my relative wants a special birding cruise to Antarctica. Some islands I'd like to do.

I think the Galapagos is a good one for sure, Fire, but since she is an environmentalist, I am saving that one in case I convince her to drop the four cruise limit.  The lure of visiting there might be enough.  Maybe. 

[Chas2crews]

I have the Horn and Antarctica, so I think the four should include Panama transit, Suez transit, and Cape of Good Hope as candidates. Then something Asian, which may or may not hit one or two  of the above as well.  I feel bad, but Scandinavia, St. Petersburg, Brazil, Ireland, and Iceland may all have to be land package visits.  

[biguntx]

On 10/3/2020 at 9:40 PM, Chas2crews said:

Now I have agreed as a compromise to cruise, solo, only four times once retired, probably in the first 2 years, and then hang up the deck shoes.  Thoughts or suggestions on this plan are appreciated as I am probably not the first in such a mixed marriage. 

I believe that is grounds for annulment.

[NSnJW]

Olemissreb,

I have only cruised on Carnival and NCL so I am no expert but I found plenty to overeat without dressing up.  I didn't even eat in the main dining room until after my 7th or 8th cruise.  I don't go to the MDR on dress up nights and I only wear a polo shirt and slacks when I do go.  The rest of the time I am in tee shirt,  jeans and sandals.

[Reina del Mar]

I couldn't agree to that !

 

Compromise is the key word.

 

Alternate holiday choices so you both have what you prefer.

[Chas2crews]

Thanks, Reina.  I hear your point.   For the time being, however, this seems to be the compromise. When one wants to cruise and the other does not, the “compromise” can’t be a bike tour for example. 

[Seamus6]

I think it is pretty unreasonable for her to not even try a single cruise with you when you offer to limit your cruising to suit her.  Unless she is cripplingly terrified of boats, I think she owes it to you to suck it up and at least try one cruise.  The poster suggesting booking around land travel is a good idea.  A LOT of avid cruisers take their first cruise with apprehension and end up loving it.  Maybe she won't be a huge fan but she might realize it is not the trip from hell she envisions.

 

Best of luck!

[Chas2crews]

On 5/14/2021 at 5:58 PM, seamus69 said:

I think it is pretty unreasonable for her to not even try a single cruise with you when you offer to limit your cruising to suit her.  Unless she is cripplingly terrified of boats, I think she owes it to you to suck it up and at least try one cruise.  The poster suggesting booking around land travel is a good idea.  A LOT of avid cruisers take their first cruise with apprehension and end up loving it.  Maybe she won't be a huge fan but she might realize it is not the trip from hell she envisions.

 

Best of luck!

Seamus, I like your approach.  It is not so much total terror but the health issues and not seeing land.  I think I will try to sneak in an Alaska cruise as a possibility since it is probably the best way to see the 49th state first time through and land is frequently visible.  My one challenge is since luxury cruises are going to be my splurge, I hate the idea of doing it on an Alaska run where I have been a few times land and sea. So, we’ll noodle on it. 

[MaineYachtClub]

Have you looked at a European river cruise?  The boats are small but luxurious. There are lots of ports.  Land is almost within reach on both sides, literally when in a canal lock.  And who can say no to the Danube?

[Chas2crews]

On 6/18/2021 at 4:25 PM, MaineYachtClub said:

Have you looked at a European river cruise?  The boats are small but luxurious. There are lots of ports.  Land is almost within reach on both sides, literally when in a canal lock.  And who can say no to the Danube?

You are onto something, Maine, and she has mentioned that as an alternative. My only river cruise to date was on the Zaire River (that name alone should tell you much), so I would like to get in my luxury ocean cruises before it is all over.  You need to stop giving practical advice, please!

[Cruise a holic]

I wouldn't hang up my cruise shoe.    I would cruise as suggested with a good friend or relative.  We all make compromises in life and your new partner should go with you on a couple of cruises a year.  If he his a phobia to being on a ship, perhaps therapy could work for him.  My daughter in law was afraid to fly and it took a special therapy to help her.  It worked after a couple of years.  She takes tranquilizers and can now fly cross country.

[Ferry_Watcher]

I am guessing that your new spouse was relieved when the cruise industry had to shut down during 2020 and the first half of 2021.  I imagine that with omicron running rampant now the spouse feels very justified in their resolve not to cruise.  (BTW, is the spouse F or M?  Need to know for the pronouns!).

 

Anyway, Alaska still awaits.  Hope to see you in Seattle/Vancouver this summer! 

[Chas2crews]

4 hours ago, Ferry_Watcher said:

I am guessing that your new spouse was relieved when the cruise industry had to shut down during 2020 and the first half of 2021.  I imagine that with omicron running rampant now the spouse feels very justified in their resolve not to cruise.  (BTW, is the spouse F or M?  Need to know for the pronouns!).

 

Anyway, Alaska still awaits.  Hope to see you in Seattle/Vancouver this summer! 

Spouse is “she,” and it sounds like you’ve been eavesdropping. I am keeping fingers crossed for Alaska, and from there we will see where we stand. This is not the worst dilemma to have in a second marriage.  

[Ferry_Watcher]

@Chas2crews, have you looked at the 2023-24 cruises yet?  Yesterday I booked a 12 day Thailand & Viet Nam on Celebrity.  Hopefully the pandemic will be a distant memory by then.

 

Any movement on the Alaska plans? Since you may be limited on the number of cruises, you might like this 14 day round trip out of Vancouver, BC.  It is on HAL Niew Amsterdam and besides Glacier Bay, it has both Sitka and Skagway and the usual Ketchikan port-of-call.  But then they mix it up with Kodiak, Valdez and Anchorage.  Instead of Victoria, BC, the ship stops at Prince Rupert.  

Sail dates are Sept 11, 2022, May 7, 2023 and Sept 2023.

Something thing to consider!

[Chas2crews]

2 hours ago, Ferry_Watcher said:

@Chas2crews, have you looked at the 2023-24 cruises yet?  Yesterday I booked a 12 day Thailand & Viet Nam on Celebrity.  Hopefully the pandemic will be a distant memory by then.

 

Any movement on the Alaska plans? Since you may be limited on the number of cruises, you might like this 14 day round trip out of Vancouver, BC.  It is on HAL Niew Amsterdam and besides Glacier Bay, it has both Sitka and Skagway and the usual Ketchikan port-of-call.  But then they mix it up with Kodiak, Valdez and Anchorage.  Instead of Victoria, BC, the ship stops at Prince Rupert.  

Sail dates are Sept 11, 2022, May 7, 2023 and Sept 2023.

Something thing to consider!

Thanks, Ferry.  We are booked, omicron permitting, on a seven day RCCL from Seattle with the blended family. I am keeping fingers crossed it will go well, though RCCL is not “Luxe,” so I worry the wrong message may get transmitted. 
 

 

[Ferry_Watcher]

2 hours ago, Chas2crews said:

Thanks, Ferry.  We are booked, omicron permitting, on a seven day RCCL from Seattle with the blended family. I am keeping fingers crossed it will go well, though RCCL is not “Luxe,” so I worry the wrong message may get transmitted. 
 

 

Chas2crew, happy for you!  is it Ovation or Quantum OTS?  So nice that you are taking the blended family.  Should be a lovely time.

[Chas2crews]

Ovation. My hope is this— if the youths are happy, everyone is happy!  

[Ferry_Watcher]

Busiest day at Pier 91, with the Ovation and Solstice in port at the same time.  Glad you found a cruise that suits everyone.   I know Pier 91 fairly well, and I post on the West Coast Departures sub topic page.

 

I also post a lot reminding people to have the correct travel documents (the very least a gov't issued birth certificate).  Since you are a veteran cruiser I know you know what is needed.  It's never too early checking passport (or passport cards) expiration dates, or gathering gov't issued birth certificates.

[KKB]

On 10/3/2020 at 9:40 PM, Chas2crews said:

I was a big cruise fan in the first marriage, so much so that I had been saving up in a special account to cruise 7 nights 2-3 times a year in retirement.  Those cruises would have been balconies on RCCL, NCL and Celebrity.  In my second marriage, the spouse is a committed non cruiser. Now I have agreed as a compromise to cruise, solo, only four times once retired, probably in the first 2 years, and then hang up the deck shoes.  I have already been on a ship to all seven continents so my plan is to do 12 to 24 nights each in inside cabins on Oceania, Azamara, Seabourn and Silversea, thus going out in a premium cruise blaze of glory to maybe hit the Panama Canal, Suez Canal and other highlights.  Thoughts or suggestions on this plan are appreciated as I am probably not the first in such a mixed marriage. 

Nope, Nope & NOPE.

WHY?

Sorry, but either we don't get married, or they compromise.

I love cruising & not stopping now