Bar Mitzvah on board

[Manatee Mom]

Has anyone ever done or been to a Bar Mitzvah on a cruise ship? My son hates the traditional dinner dance thing. Would appreciate any help or suggestions.

[Ausgirl]

Now that's an interesting question. If they regularly do weddings on board cruise ships, why not Bar Mitzvah parties? I imagine you would do the ceremony on land in a synagogue, which would take care of the religious, spiritual part, but for the party/celebration - that would be worth investigating. Some lines may, some may not.

[room010]

If you just want a celebration party then I don't see why not. If you want the actual ceremony on board I guess you'd have to ask your rabbi if it's possible to do so elsewhere than a synagogue.

[imsulin]

Really interesting question! All of the Bar/Bat Mitzvahs I've attended have been in a Synagogue. The "reception" was always held in a privately booked venue. Cruise lines do onboard weddings, but only in a US port. Weddings between US citizens must be performed in US ports. (Mainland US, St. Thomas, St.John, Puerto Rico) The ship must be at anchor on the US mainland. Ask your rabbi about the legalities. It might also depend if you're Orthodox, Conservative, or Reformed. Kosher food will be provided on request by most cruise lines. Note "on request". Anything you do re: a Bar Mitzvah must be pre-approved by: Your rabbi 2: the cruise line. Please let us know if you are able to do this!

 

This information provided by a Protestant.

[Manatee Mom]

A few months ago the Palm Beach Post had an article about RCCL was doing Bar Mitzvah's at sea. They would conect you with a Rabbi and if i remember right the lessons would be done via internet. The service and party would all be onboard. I was hoping to find someone who might have done it or been to one. My son loves the idea because of travel sports we don't have the time to do it the traditional way. (In our Palm Beach schools we have PE only once every 4 days, so our kids need the activities)

[Fredr]

Good question...

 

Mickey Arison, Eugene Frank, and Penny Pritzker have been to many Bar and Bat Mitzvahs. And the idea itself I am sure, will bring a smile.

 

I am reasonably sure that they would not object to having same on their ships, provided of course that an ordained Rabbi was in charge. A ship's captain can do many things but a Bar Mitzvah?

Edited November 5, 2009 by Fredr

[Andee]

It is my understanding that a 13 year old becomes (not has) a Bar Mitzvah just by attaining that age.

Most commonly, at the ceremony, the Bar Mitzvah leads the congregation in Sabbath morning worship, blesses and reads from the Torah, chants the Haftarah, and delivers a sermon based on the portion.

 

Some of the issues would be obtaining and bringing on board a Torah scroll and having a Rabbi, Cantor, or other trained Torah reader to make sure the Torah is read correctly, and to correct the Bar Mittzvah, if necessary.

[iheartbda]

Has anyone ever done or been to a Bar Mitzvah on a cruise ship? My son hates the traditional dinner dance thing. Would appreciate any help or suggestions.

Try asking your question here.:)

 

http://boards.cruisecritic.com/showthread.php?t=175242

[njhorseman]

Really interesting question! All of the Bar/Bat Mitzvahs I've attended have been in a Synagogue. The "reception" was always held in a privately booked venue. Cruise lines do onboard weddings, but only in a US port. Weddings between US citizens must be performed in US ports. (Mainland US, St. Thomas, St.John, Puerto Rico) The ship must be at anchor on the US mainland. Ask your rabbi about the legalities. It might also depend if you're Orthodox, Conservative, or Reformed. Kosher food will be provided on request by most cruise lines. Note "on request". Anything you do re: a Bar Mitzvah must be pre-approved by: Your rabbi 2: the cruise line. Please let us know if you are able to do this!

 

This information provided by a Protestant.

 

 

A Bar Mitzvah is strictly a religious ceremony. Unlike a wedding it has no legal ramifications. The US port issue is irrelevant. By the way, on Princess cruise ships that are registered in Bermuda (or any cruise ship registered in Bermuda for that matter), the ship's captain can legally perform weddings at sea as Bermuda law permits them to do so.

[K&RCurt]

A Bar Mitzvah is strictly a religious ceremony. Unlike a wedding it has no legal ramifications. The US port issue is irrelevant. By the way, on Princess cruise ships that are registered in Bermuda (or any cruise ship registered in Bermuda for that matter), the ship's captain can legally perform weddings at sea as Bermuda law permits them to do so.

 

 

I believe they were referring to compliance with GOD'S law, not secular law.

[njhorseman]

I believe they were referring to compliance with GOD'S law, not secular law.

 

Perhaps, but why mention asking a rabbi about "legalities" right after pointing out that weddings have to be conducted while at anchor in a US port, something that is strictly a civil legal issue, and then in the next sentence say "It might also depend if you're Orthodox, Conservative, or Reformed". The latter sentence, which includes the word "also" ( a key hint to meaning in my opinion) covers the religious issue.

Edited November 5, 2009 by njhorseman

[Traveler353]

Google "Bar Mitzvah's at sea". The first listing is for a company that puts them together.

[Manatee Mom]

Google "Bar Mitzvah's at sea". The first listing is for a company that puts them together.

 

Thank you!!!!

 

As for the religious portion, everyone has their own opinions, and every family needs to do what is best for them. If we were looking for something formal with a Rabbi we would be doing it in the Temple at home. But in no will that make this any less meaningful for my son. In some aspects with how some of the parties and services are done today they have lost the whole meaning. (I rather do it on Masada, but my DH and DS don't want to)

 

We have been on so many cruises I can book the cruise and arrange the party i know that isn't the problem. I was wondering how people have done it. Do they invite the family/friends and help pay? Have they done it for the weekend trip or taken the cruise to Europe? Was just wondering how others have done it......

[sail7seas]

So you're going to have a Bar Mitzvah party but the young man is not going to have any religious service? You will just sail as a group and have a party called "Bar Mitzvah Party" or such? Does he read Torah? Is he learning a portion for the appropriate date of the event? No rabbi will be there? Certainly do it the way you wish but all you need is a party planner if it is just about a Bar Mitzvah Party, right?

 

Not judging by any means; just trying to understand.

 

 

 

 

 

Edited November 5, 2009 by sail7seas

[yogi2929]

Do you really want to schlep a Torah?

 

We've been to B'nai Mitzvahs in hotels. One was when we were renovating our synagogue and another time it was with a Rent-a-Rabbi.

 

The ceremony can be held before the cruise and the cruise be the party.

 

Or have it at a Temple at a port of call. St Thomas has a lovely synagogue in the Sephardic tradition that is the oldest in the Western Hemisphere.

 

The problem with having the ceremony at a port of call is the weather doesn't always cooperate. Better chance of docking than tendering. If you have the Bar Mitzvah on the cruise the Rabbi's fare will also need to be paid.

 

The program Trope Trainer helped one of our daughters. We found it on the net for about $100.

 

The Torah does not have to be read on a Saturday, it can also be read on a Thursday.

Edited November 6, 2009 by yogi2929

[Fredr]

Yogi,

 

Does Temple Beth Israel of the Pomona Valley sound familiar to you?

[Manatee Mom]

So you're going to have a Bar Mitzvah party but the young man is not going to have any religious service?

 

 

That is not what I said, I said we have the religious part under control. He will be doing a service on board. I didn't want to get into discussing that because everyone has their own views (in our family we go from Hasidic to non practicing) I am just trying to figure out the logistics of how other people have done this with their families and friends.

[cb at sea]

So, basically, you are just wanting the ship to provide a private party space for those on the cruise to celebrate this occassion.....should NOT be a problem. The ship does this sort of thing ALL the time. It doesn't matter what the party is for....it's still just a party!

Call RCI and ask them how to set it up!

[yogi2929]

Yogi,

 

Does Temple Beth Israel of the Pomona Valley sound familiar to you?

 

Kids went to preschool there. We are members over at Ontario.

 

ManateeMom- Sounds like you have the religious part all figured out. At that point the party would be like planning a 'wedding'. Check on the Wedding board for ideas. Might also want to ask over on the Cruising Jewish thread over in the Floataway lounge.

 

Do you need kosher food? Carnival does not offer kosher food. I know HAL does and I have heard it is pretty good. HAL won't kasher the kitchen but does prepare ready-to-serve kosher meals.

[hubofhockey]

This thread should be called the "Keeping up with the Steins" thread.

[sail7seas]

That is not what I said, I said we have the religious part under control. He will be doing a service on board. I didn't want to get into discussing that because everyone has their own views (in our family we go from Hasidic to non practicing) I am just trying to figure out the logistics of how other people have done this with their families and friends.

 

That was my point.

I was trying to figure out just what it was you were saying. :cool:

 

So...... like I said, All you really need is a party planner on the ship to help you with your party? Right?

[Fredr]

Hello,

 

If you need help with a minyan, my wife and I will gladly participate. It will cost you just the airfare and an inside cabin for two. As I try to be a macher and get my wife a balcony, to help you this time with the minyan we'll take an Inside.

 

My wife will also help with the Oneg.

[imsulin]

Shoot - I'm not even Jewish, but did try to post a reply (immediately shot down by njhorseman. Thanks so much). I was just trying to relate my experiences with Bar/Bat Mitzvahs. Our neighborhood was well-mixed (thankfully), so Mitzvahs, Persian New Years, Quincenearas, First Communions and Confirmations, and Chinese New Years were pretty much the norm. We also had a great Juneteenth celebration each year. When I was in High School, I baby-sat for an Orthodox family, and learned early on about meat and dairy.

 

njhorseman - I know much more about comparative religions than you do, because I lived with them.

 

OP - I'm sure you'll be able to pull it together, and your son will have wonderful memories! Best of luck to you!

[njhorseman]

Shoot - I'm not even Jewish, but did try to post a reply (immediately shot down by njhorseman. Thanks so much). I was just trying to relate my experiences with Bar/Bat Mitzvahs. Our neighborhood was well-mixed (thankfully), so Mitzvahs, Persian New Years, Quincenearas, First Communions and Confirmations, and Chinese New Years were pretty much the norm. We also had a great Juneteenth celebration each year. When I was in High School, I baby-sat for an Orthodox family, and learned early on about meat and dairy.

 

njhorseman - I know much more about comparative religions than you do, because I lived with them.

 

OP - I'm sure you'll be able to pull it together, and your son will have wonderful memories! Best of luck to you!

 

Your comment on the legalities of weddings on board ship were both irrelevant and not completely accurate.

 

And just how would you know what my life experiences have been?

Edited November 7, 2009 by njhorseman

[Fredr]

Gentlemen,

 

From the motion picture Stage Coach "let's have some christian charity" when considering the merits of Bar and Bat Mitzvahs at sea.

 

There is no need for any harsh words about one another. All that matters really is that the studying gets done and that everyone smiles in the pictures. especially when on the bimah.