notentirelynormal Posted October 19, 2012 #51 Share Posted October 19, 2012 No one is attacking your status as a Mom or Dad in this thread. But it is not unreasonable to raise the op's question. They don't see the attraction of cruising with infants. Heck, many parents with infants also don't see the attraction of cruising with infants. I'm including myself in that group, and I'm not a bad guy who is mad because somebody whizzed in my Wheaties. No reason to flame anybody here, just answer that you personally love cruising with your really young kids, and why. Both groups are entitled to have an opinion. Actually read the OPs post again. She doesn't ask WHY people bring their kids but complains that we do. She has decided when the kids will be old enough. She has decided that the parents want to be alone and not with their kids and she has decided when and what children remember. So, yes, she has attacked many people's idea of a family. She can raise her kids how she wants but please have the courtesy to let us raise ours the way we want to. Maybe her marriage had issues where she needed to be alone with her husband. I didn't. We managed to find alone time when we were at home raising our kids. We also had no relatives close by to leave our kids with. We were in a different state so the cost of either bringing in a expensive sitter or flying someone up to us or the kids down to them covered more then the cost of the cruise. Everyone has to decided what works for them. Again, the OP didn't ASK why we did it, she simply told us we were wrong to do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calliopecruiser Posted October 19, 2012 #52 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Again, the OP didn't ASK why we did it, she simply told us we were wrong to do it. Actually, she did ask why you do it. She said "So why do parents do it?" Then goes on to say "Just wondering....and I'm not complaining as long as they don't cry in my ear, make stinkies during dinner, or don't knock me down as they are running as fast as they can to get away from Daddy." A very reasonable question and comment, IMO. Still, it seems, parents who are hyper-sensitive or self-conscious (thinking everyone must be talking about them) have decided that she was complaining about kids being allowed on cruises or (as you are) telling parents not to take children on cruises. Actually, it's comments like yours that make me dislike traveling with families: parents who automatically assume anyone complaining about problems with children must be complaining about them or their parenting skills/styles......It's not the children that bother me nearly as much as the self-righteous parents that often accompany them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
navybankerteacher Posted October 19, 2012 #53 Share Posted October 19, 2012 For a young couple with a very young baby cruising makes a lot of sense: you unpack once, you can bring the baby with you around the ship, to dining venues, etc. depending on the baby's capacity. What sort of alternate vacation could such a couple consider -- unless they have trusted baby care with whom they can leave the baby, they simply cannot vacation at all. As far as the other passsengers are concedrned, I would just as soon experience a nearby baby as a grumpy senior, a drunken twenty-something, or a surly teen-ager. I am more likely to accept "disturbing" behavior from a little one who knows no better than from a self-absorbed individual who should know better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitty9 Posted October 19, 2012 #54 Share Posted October 19, 2012 (edited) Mom doesn't have to clean or cook when on a cruise. Maybe that's the vacation she wants with the kids. As long as the baby doesn't scream all night long, and the parents don't take a vacation from parenting on a cruise, who cares? I'm one of those who isn't thrilled at having 700 or more kids on a ship because I have experienced downright horrible behaviors by kids when parents decide to take a vacation from being a parent. But I will say, when I decide to take a cruise during high volume kid times, I adjust my expectations accordingly. Usually I take cruises when kids are supposed to be in school or I take long cruises, that limits the number of kids on board. But families have as much right to cruise as anyone else. Edited October 19, 2012 by kitty9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cusecruise Posted October 19, 2012 #55 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Interesting topic and even more interesting reactions. I don't have kids so perhaps my perspective is skewed but I go to Disney and I see the parents with the toddlers, schleping onto the bus to go to the park with diaper bags and pacifiers and the like and the even more tired kids and parents back on the bus at the end of the day, everyone cranky, tired and more often than not crying because the kids were just simply too young for an all day adventure. To me, that does not seem like fun. If I were to pick, I would wait until the kids were a little older so that we all could have a good time experiencing the magic of Disney. I see cruises as the same - if the kids are old enough, and well behaved enough (yes, this does matter) then by all means go on the cruise. What is old enough - for some kids that could be a baby, a toddler or an teenager. It all depends on whether or not the child is going to enjoy where they are and what they are doing. If they love the onboard activities for kids and they can handle the sitimulation of a cruise, bring them along! But if they cannot and the whole trip is a cry-fest and a chore for mom and dad then the parents need to be the parents and either forgo the trip until the kids are ready or make the decision to leave the kids at home. I don't take my nieces and nephews to a fine dining restaurant as I don't think they can handle being there and behaving properly. When they are old enough to act as they should and have fun being there, we'll go, in the meantime we'll go to the local family restaurant that is geared toward their being there and where they can have fun. Bottom line, it depends on the kids, the parents and the ship. But to be fair to your fellow cruisers, think before you make the decision as a parent, don't just bring the kids along because you can, bring them along because everyone is going to enjoy being there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jesron1269 Posted October 19, 2012 #56 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Actually, she did ask why you do it. She said "So why do parents do it?" Then goes on to say "Just wondering....and I'm not complaining as long as they don't cry in my ear, make stinkies during dinner, or don't knock me down as they are running as fast as they can to get away from Daddy." A very reasonable question and comment, IMO. Still, it seems, parents who are hyper-sensitive or self-conscious (thinking everyone must be talking about them) have decided that she was complaining about kids being allowed on cruises or (as you are) telling parents not to take children on cruises. Actually, it's comments like yours that make me dislike traveling with families: parents who automatically assume anyone complaining about problems with children must be complaining about them or their parenting skills/styles......It's not the children that bother me nearly as much as the self-righteous parents that often accompany them. Don't toss stones while living in glass houses! While I understand the logic of the OP I too think she is passing judgment in her post which is why I think she has come under fire. That being said this could be a discussion (probably not very fruitful one) but a discussion all the same if people would stop making comments like the one above. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calliopecruiser Posted October 19, 2012 #57 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Don't toss stones while living in glass houses! While I understand the logic of the OP I too think she is passing judgment in her post which is why I think she has come under fire. That being said this could be a discussion (probably not very fruitful one) but a discussion all the same if people would stop making comments like the one above. LOL! I'm not a parent, but I am occasionally self-righteous. I have no doubt that there are people who don't like me......but, to the amazement of some, I'm OK with that. You can't please all the people all the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wwcruisers Posted October 19, 2012 #58 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Mom doesn't have to clean or cook when on a cruise. Maybe that's the vacation she wants with the kids. As long as the baby doesn't scream all night long, and the parents don't take a vacation from parenting on a cruise, who cares? I'm one of those who isn't thrilled at having 700 or more kids on a ship because I have experienced downright horrible behaviors by kids when parents decide to take a vacation from being a parent. But I will say, when I decide to take a cruise during high volume kid times, I adjust my expectations accordingly. Usually I take cruises when kids are supposed to be in school or I take long cruises, that limits the number of kids on board. But families have as much right to cruise as anyone else. Agreed! You and I are definitely on the same wave-length when it comes to avoiding cruises with large numbers of kids on board. And, I think you hit the nail on the head about why a mom would want to take a cruise as a family vacation. When our family was young, we did a lot of camping, and sometime splurged on a beach condo. Lots of fun, but lots of work -- someone still has to cook, clean, and -- often -- do laundry. :rolleyes: I had a very pleasant surprise last month during our 'wine cruise' on Celebrity Millennium. Not many kids on board at all -- but there was a baby girl (under a year) at a table near us in the MDR. Since one of the reasons we book second seating is to avoid kids, DH and I gave each other one of those "Oh no" looks. Boy, were we surprised! The parents were obviously seasoned cruisers, and they made sure that the child didn't arrive in the dining room hungry and tired. She was always dressed in the cutest outfits (I think mom made them). During the whole cruise, we only heard her cry once -- and within seconds, Dad navigated her stroller out of the room, giving mom a chance to finish her meal. The last night, we told the parents that we thought they were doing a great job with their little angel. :cool: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doug S Posted October 19, 2012 #59 Share Posted October 19, 2012 I am glad to see the above posts that are trying to send this back toward a discussion, rather than a flame-fest. I understand the op's point, at least in part. Admittedly, she may have come off to some as being a bit judgemental. The internet is good at that. But ultimately, she was asking 'Why'. Its easy to be judgemental in return and have the thread degrade into an arguement. It's more useful to respond with why you love cruising with your children without feeling it was a personal attack on your lifestyle. I do not agree with everything the op put out there. As I said in my earlier post, diaper bags and cruises were not a good fit for us. I'll go even further to say that for me, it sounds like a vacation from hell. But everyone's evperience is different, and that is just my opinion. During those years we went on many other vacations that we felt fit our needs better. However, for us the ages from about 5 to 12 were great years to take the kids. It worked for us for many reasons: Dining options, no diapers, positive social interaction, cultural exposure, bunk arrangements, excursions, and kids activities were all among the things we considered in forming our opinion. The fact that the kids would be old enough to actually remember the experience and gain from it was considered in our vacation choices, so you can't outright dismiss that as a factor for everyone. If you look at the demographics of a typical cruise ship, it is apparent that many people feel the same way I do, and there is an equally valid reason why you can't walk thru Disney without dodging strollers all day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lysolqn Posted October 19, 2012 #60 Share Posted October 19, 2012 But to be fair to your fellow cruisers, think before you make the decision as a parent, don't just bring the kids along because you can, bring them along because everyone is going to enjoy being there. On behalf of all parents and grandparents who cruise with their children/grandchildren, thank you for sharing your obvious expertise on the subject. I can't imagine how we've managed all these years without benefit of your deep insight, extensive experience and words of wisdom to guide us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sinppu Posted October 19, 2012 #61 Share Posted October 19, 2012 I am really sorry to see someone pi$$ed in your corn flakes! If I didn't know better (which I do) I might think that the OP pi$$ed in yours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhotoGal07 Posted October 19, 2012 #62 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Meh, different people have different vacation needs. Some families have two parents who work full time, and it's a huge treat for them to spend extra time with their kids. Other families have a stay at home parent and no family to help out in the area, and it's a huge treat to get away from the kids. Some people can afford multiple vacations during the year, and can have a getaway vacation and a family vacation, others have to prioritize and only go on one. Some people don't have anyone at all to help watch little ones while on vacation, and figure half a vacation is better than none at all. Always remember that your circumstances and preferences are not shared by everyone. Would I choose to cruise with an infant, probably not, but i'mcertainly not surprised by those who do. This year we'll be cruising with out two year old daughter. She loves the beach and will have a blast in port, and we booked a suite so we'll have a blast on our balcony while she naps/goes to bed early. Different strokes for different folks. As long as kids aren't being disruptive during shows and dinner, it doesn't matter to me what families choose to do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karysa Posted October 19, 2012 #63 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Meh, different people have different vacation needs. Some families have two parents who work full time, and it's a huge treat for them to spend extra time with their kids. Other families have a stay at home parent and no family to help out in the area, and it's a huge treat to get away from the kids. Some people can afford multiple vacations during the year, and can have a getaway vacation and a family vacation, others have to prioritize and only go on one. Some people don't have anyone at all to help watch little ones while on vacation, and figure half a vacation is better than none at all. Always remember that your circumstances and preferences are not shared by everyone. Would I choose to cruise with an infant, probably not, but i'mcertainly not surprised by those who do. This year we'll be cruising with out two year old daughter. She loves the beach and will have a blast in port, and we booked a suite so we'll have a blast on our balcony while she naps/goes to bed early. Different strokes for different folks. As long as kids aren't being disruptive during shows and dinner, it doesn't matter to me what families choose to do. That's because you are a Normal Reasonable Adult. We need more of your type on cc and on board. Happy sailing.:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jocap Posted October 19, 2012 #64 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Suggest that people who prefer child free go on an adult only cruise ship- P&O have 3; Saga has 2......;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneStrangeGuy Posted October 19, 2012 #65 Share Posted October 19, 2012 A month from now I will be cruising on a 15 day cruise to Hawaii with two young ladies, Grandchildren, ages 7 and 9. I can assure you that they have been looking forward to this trip for the better part of a year. There is no question in my mind that they will remember this trip for the rest of their lives! :) In my case, there were three choices. 1. cruise alone. 2. Take the ex-wife. 3. take the two girls. The choice was a no-brainer! :rolleyes: I can assure you that I am very sensitive to posts about il-behaved children. I know from past non-cruise trips that these kids are well behaved. Nevertheless, they have been advised of the rules, and I will keep a close eye on them to ensure that they do behave. :cool: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparky-elpaso Posted October 19, 2012 #66 Share Posted October 19, 2012 A month from now I will be cruising on a 15 day cruise to Hawaii with two young ladies, Grandchildren, ages 7 and 9. I can assure you that they have been looking forward to this trip for the better part of a year. There is no question in my mind that they will remember this trip for the rest of their lives! :) In my case, there were three choices. 1. cruise alone. 2. Take the ex-wife. 3. take the two girls. The choice was a no-brainer! :rolleyes: I can assure you that I am very sensitive to posts about il-behaved children. I know from past non-cruise trips that these kids are well behaved. Nevertheless, they have been advised of the rules, and I will keep a close eye on them to ensure that they do behave. :cool: Hopefully this will be the first of many with them. They'll have a ball, I'm sure.:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marco Posted October 20, 2012 #67 Share Posted October 20, 2012 They way some family dynamics are now, the only time families really get to spend some quality time together is when on vacation. Good for them. Kids are kids and they should be! I've never seen truly ill behaved kids ever on any cruise, ya, sometimes they are noisier and more animated that adults, BUT THEIR KIDS!!!!!!...let them be kids. They're going to be adults and the're going to have to behave "like adults" for the rest of their lives! I've had some very nice conversations with people younger than 12 while on cruises. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cruisin' Chick Posted October 20, 2012 #68 Share Posted October 20, 2012 Actually read the OPs post again. She doesn't ask WHY people bring their kids but complains that we do. She has decided when the kids will be old enough. She has decided that the parents want to be alone and not with their kids and she has decided when and what children remember. So, yes, she has attacked many people's idea of a family. She can raise her kids how she wants but please have the courtesy to let us raise ours the way we want to. Maybe her marriage had issues where she needed to be alone with her husband. I didn't. We managed to find alone time when we were at home raising our kids. We also had no relatives close by to leave our kids with. We were in a different state so the cost of either bringing in a expensive sitter or flying someone up to us or the kids down to them covered more then the cost of the cruise. Everyone has to decided what works for them. Again, the OP didn't ASK why we did it, she simply told us we were wrong to do it. I read between the lines too. If she had simply asked, "Do you travel with little kids?" because she simply wanted to know parents' experiences, both good and bad, that would be one thing. But the way that she worded her post, seemed like more what my hubby would call a **** sandwich. Interesting topic and even more interesting reactions. I don't have kids so perhaps my perspective is skewed but I go to Disney and I see the parents with the toddlers, schleping onto the bus to go to the park with diaper bags and pacifiers and the like and the even more tired kids and parents back on the bus at the end of the day, everyone cranky, tired and more often than not crying because the kids were just simply too young for an all day adventure. To me, that does not seem like fun. If I were to pick, I would wait until the kids were a little older so that we all could have a good time experiencing the magic of Disney. I see cruises as the same - if the kids are old enough, and well behaved enough (yes, this does matter) then by all means go on the cruise. What is old enough - for some kids that could be a baby, a toddler or an teenager. It all depends on whether or not the child is going to enjoy where they are and what they are doing. If they love the onboard activities for kids and they can handle the sitimulation of a cruise, bring them along! But if they cannot and the whole trip is a cry-fest and a chore for mom and dad then the parents need to be the parents and either forgo the trip until the kids are ready or make the decision to leave the kids at home. I don't take my nieces and nephews to a fine dining restaurant as I don't think they can handle being there and behaving properly. When they are old enough to act as they should and have fun being there, we'll go, in the meantime we'll go to the local family restaurant that is geared toward their being there and where they can have fun. Bottom line, it depends on the kids, the parents and the ship. But to be fair to your fellow cruisers, think before you make the decision as a parent, don't just bring the kids along because you can, bring them along because everyone is going to enjoy being there. We did the Disneyland thing when our kid was about a year-plus of age. A little over an hour's drive each way, if we avoided rush hour (we left around 6am, got to Anaheim a little after 7am, went to a hotel for a breakfast before heading to the DL parking lot). It was a really long day as we didn't want to stay overnight there. Hardest on hubby as he did the driving. Also any snacks and meals there were major expenses (fortunately, I was able to take along a sippy cup with a drink for her and snacks such as goldfish crackers). So the amount of planning and packing for one day trip that lasted over 18 hours by the time we got home, and with the cost of admission, cost of meals, cost of gas...and spending the day pushing her stroller, and carrying her wherever we had to park her stroller, well, for just a little more $ and just a little more packing, we had a much more relaxing time on the three-day cruise we took her on. I'm not being defensive as I know some people would rather spend days at DL/CA or DW, but I'm not one of those. To each his own. If seeing a child on a cruise makes you winch, that's your problem. As long as my kid isn't punching all the buttons in an elevator or knocking on cabin doors at 3am, why would you care if she's on the same ship as you. And for all the people who have ever complimented me on my daughter's manners on a ship, thanks. We parents do appreciate your comments.:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruiseguy4567 Posted October 20, 2012 #69 Share Posted October 20, 2012 Actually, IMO it's better because the misbehaving adult can be held responsible for his/her own actions, so a misbehaving adult can more easily be "dealt with" by other people than a misbehaving child. With a misbehaving adult, no one has to work through a proxy (who may or may not be cooperative......if a parent doesn't want to reign in a misbehaving child, there's nothing that can be done about it) and can deal with the offender directly. A restaurant/hotel/cruise ship/amusement park has more options and an easier time in dealing with misbehaving adults than misbehaving children, as do the other patrons/passengers. Misbehaving adults are worse because they have no respect for authority. Don't hold open doors, get on elevator before you get off, chair hog, cut in line, drunk and loud, ignorant, sneeze on buffet food, don't wash their hands in the bathroom, generally believe they are the most important person wherever they are. At least small children don't know better, the adults should. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex71 Posted October 20, 2012 #70 Share Posted October 20, 2012 (edited) Ok, trying to come back to the original question. Here's why we think cruising is perfect for us with (relatively) small kids : Before we had kids, we usually had a rental car, drove around in the countries we visited, played things by ear without always having a plan, without having hotel reservations and without knowing where we would find a restaurant for lunch and dinner. It happened to us that all hotels in a particular place were full. Sometimes we changed plans and drove a few more hours till we reached the next place we wanted to see, sometimes we slept in the car. Now, with kids, that's all different. They don't like to spend a long time in the car, they need structure and routines, they have strong food preferences. Flying to an interesting destination, getting a car at the airport and just taking it from there no longer works. With a cruise you have exactly the structure and routines that kids need. They sleep in the same room for the duration of the trip, have fixed dining times, their food preferences are easy to cater to. In addition, there are usually other kids they can become friends with, there's a kids program and in case a particular port doesn't interest them, they can even stay on the ship. Cruising makes it possible for us to keep exploring new destinations, expose the kids to new impressions that can stimulate their brain and give them the opportunity to learn about the places we visit. Lastly, as others have said, it is a great way to spend time as a family. Edited October 20, 2012 by Alex71 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
triplett Posted October 21, 2012 #71 Share Posted October 21, 2012 (edited) I love kids' date=' have had a few, and am still surrounded with scads of neices, nephews, grandkids but have NEVER cruised with any youngster under the age of 12. Vacations with the younger ones (6 to 12) have always been vacations of the kids type...Disneyland, beach trips, national parks. Anyone under 6 has been left home. I frequently see families with babies (and I mean teeny weeny babies), a couple still in diapers (that can't be fun on vacation) and a preschooler or two. Mom and Dad (and the Grandparents if they are roped into coming along) spend all their time feeding, watching, running after, disciplining, cleaning up after, etc. their brood and don't seem to have any Mommy Daddy time, or adult conversation. Most children don't remember what they did in life before the age of 6 and don't care about a lot until they are 12 as far as "doing" something different on vacation. So why do parents do it? Just wondering....and I'm not complaining as long as they don't cry in my ear, make stinkies during dinner, or don't knock me down as they are running as fast as they can to get away from Daddy. They are someone else's headache, not mine.[/quote'] I wanted to spend the time with my daughter. I wanted to have the memories of watching her enjoy herself and have fun. We have pictures, so if she doesn't remember, they will refresh her memory. The most important thing to me was, you can't get that time with them back, and the opprtunity to make those memories is only with you for a brief moment, take advantage of it. Edited October 21, 2012 by triplett Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GORDONCHICK Posted October 21, 2012 #72 Share Posted October 21, 2012 Cruising is a great family vacation! We also do driving/land vacations, but usually cruise at least once each year as a family - wouldn't dream of leaving our son! He's 11 now, but we started when he was 3.5. At 3.5, he very vividly remembers the Panama Canal, how well he was treated in the MDR - including chocolate milk at dinner. He also remembers meeting the captain of the ship, and the captain just bent down and scooped up our son and they had a face to face conversation. He loves dressing for formal nights when we cruise lines that still adhere to that. He's experienced meeting children with much much less than he has - in Guatemala, Belize, and the Dominican Republic. He's well traveled, has learned much, knows there's much more out there to learn and is excited about it. When he's in school and they are studying a place he's been to, he drags the photos he took plus some of mine to school. If someone doesn't want to bring their own children, that's their call - just like it's mine when I do bring my own. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
grand isle joe Posted October 22, 2012 #73 Share Posted October 22, 2012 Misbehaving adults are worse because they have no respect for authority. Don't hold open doors, get on elevator before you get off, chair hog, cut in line, drunk and loud, ignorant, sneeze on buffet food, don't wash their hands in the bathroom, generally believe they are the most important person wherever they are. At least small children don't know better, the adults should. ...and then throw into that mix a "status" level that certain cruise lines have than you have created a "CRUISINSTEIN". Out of control gimmee-gimmee, they owe me, arrogant,moron. Yea I would rather spend a day with a kid than a minute with a Cruisinstein....Right on Cruiseguy4567:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rare Gail & Marty sailing away Posted October 22, 2012 #74 Share Posted October 22, 2012 The kids have fun ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rare Gail & Marty sailing away Posted October 22, 2012 #75 Share Posted October 22, 2012 Misbehaving adults are worse because they have no respect for authority. Don't hold open doors, get on elevator before you get off, chair hog, cut in line, drunk and loud, ignorant, sneeze on buffet food, don't wash their hands in the bathroom, generally believe they are the most important person wherever they are. At least small children don't know better, the adults should. I agree :):) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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