Do you dress to Impress?

[susie8862]

Hi ladies..a while back, I posted a question to the men.

 

Does your lady dress to impress or for comfort. I was amazed at how many men said "for comfort", but they wish it were different. So many also said "happy wife, happy life" and if that is what she wants, then fine. I would say about 80% of the men had the same response.

 

My question is....are we getting too lazy? Too old to care about make-up, hair, attire?

 

I saw a talk show a few weeks back with men that said they WANT their ladies to dress and take pride in how they look. One man actually said he admires women and always looks. His wife gets angry at this, but the husbands response is..."when you start taking care of yourself, I will stop looking at other women" (OMG) I am sure he was in hot water when he got home...lol.

 

I am sure I will see a lot of opinions, but I would love to hear how the women REALLY feel. Thank you ladies..:o

[lara_lox]

As any of you who have ever seen my pictures know, I always 'dress to impress', even when I'm more casual. But I don't dress to try to impress other people, I just like to take pride in my appearance and I feel good when I think I look nice. What I wear or how I look might not be everyone's cup of tea but if it makes me happy why not?! I also see no reason why you can't dress up and still be comfortable. It's just a case of wearing what is right for you - I know not everyone would be happy in my 5 inch platform heels but I am and I love my shoes so I wear them if I get chance!

 

I would also put time and effort in if I'm doing something with a partner, because I would want to look nice for them. Not because they (or I for that matter) think I should but because I think it's good to make an effort for someone you care about. Though saying that I'm not someone who would leap out of bed at the crack of dawn to do my hair and put on a full face of make-up before my partner wakes up - I look the way I do and if they don't like me au-natural then they probably aren't the one for me.

 

I do think it is easy for people to get a bit lazy though and stop bothering. Again, not that I think they should dress up for other people, but for themselves too. It's different things that matter to different people, but most you ladies will know what I mean about how good can feel from wearing a new outfit/ having your hair done/ getting a manicure. And of course it is always nice to get a compliment off someone or see the smile on your partner's face when you have pulled out all the stops for them.

 

I don't think age comes into it either, there is no such thing as getting too old to bother! I have seen plenty of women who are very young but take no care with their appearance or older ladies who look immaculate and very elegant. My mum is almost 60 and looks amazing, and my grandma still took great pride in her appearance even though she was well into her 70's.

 

I know I will probably get loads of responses about being vain, comfort is important, looks aren't everything etc but these are just a few thoughts from me on the subject! :)

[Hoyaheel]

Comfort is certainly important. I don't wear high heels because they are uncomfortable to me. But that doesn't mean I'm a slob either. It is totally doable to look attractive, age appropriate, weight appropriate, AND be comfortable. I take pride in at least trying to put myself together before I'm seen in public:p And if I'm in ballet flats instead of 5" heels, my husband still thinks I'm hot:D

[Happy ks]

When I'm at home I relax and wear comfortable clothes, a pair of yoga pants and a top, or stretchy shorts and a tank top, depending on weather. I have a couple sundresses I only wear at home. If my clothes show wear and tear, even the ones I do housework in, I tend to get rid of them as I just can't stand to wear holey or stained clothing.

 

But if I'm walking out the front door, you can be sure I'm showered, makeup, hair, pressed clothing...even if it's just to go to the grocery store.

 

I don't think I dress to impress anyone other than myself, I don't need the attention. If I feel like I look good it's reflected in my attitude that day.

 

I think people do notice if you haven't made any effort, perhaps not nice but that's reality. I try my best not to make judgement on appearance since that can be so misleading, but we all do it to some extent.

 

Turn this around and ask how women want their men to look. My husband always looks great, his clothes are neat and pressed, hair combed, shoes polished. He doesn't just roll out of bed and throw on rumply jeans and a t-shirt. I appreciate the effort he makes and I'm always proud to be with him.

[LindaM]

Lara, I guess I'm like your 60 year old mom, because I try to look the best I can at that age plus one! I NEVER leave my house without makeup, or putting thought into what I am wearing. The bad part of cruising is that in order to get to shore excursions without spending too much time on hair and makeup, I have to put my hair in a pony tail---not my best look. I need a wig!

[cruisemom42]

Where I live, I've found that in life (as in cruising), women tend to look better and more put together on a daily basis than men do. I'm forever amazed to see great looking women (really, could almost be models) on the arm of a schlumpy-looking guy wearing nondescript clothing....and they have the nerve to judge....?

 

Personally, I think we should get beyond the idea that we should look nice because "our men" want us to look nice. My opinion is that we should look nice for ourselves and for everyone (including a "man" if there's one in the picture). But personally, if I felt a man was thinking "when you start taking care of yourself, I will stop looking at other women," I'd know he didn't have what I would be looking for in a SO.

[sherilyn70]

Here is the problem with society at this point. Many of us have realized that society labels people and makes those that aren't as pretty feel as if they aren't good enough. They insist we have to be something that we aren't and wear makeup, spend time on our hair, diet to be the perfect weight, work out to have the best muscle tone etc. I'm not sure where this idea ever came from but it's just plain silly. It leads to many disorders and issues of low self esteem, anorexia, depression, etc. A person is a person and dressing them up in paint and hair products does not change anything about who they are and should not be judged as a standard of being attractive. We should love people for who they are and nothing more. So many in my generation (I'm 40) and younger are forgoing makeup and the sense of false identities in order to "impress" others. If you aren't impressed with who I am without makeup then why should it make an ounce of difference with it on? I want to be liked and appreciated for what I actually contribute and give to others instead of what I bought and how much time I spent to become someone else.

Edited December 4, 2012 by sherilyn70

[Laurie S.]

I dress to impress me--yeah, I do clean up pretty well. That's an inside joke among us archaeologists. But, I enjoy the dressing up part because my usual outfit is jeans and a t-shirt. My guy says he could care less what I wear, but his face gives him away when I put something really nice on, especially if it's lowcut or has a thigh-high slit. I enjoy the compliments, but I'm not fishing for them. It's simply fun to do something different.

[LittleMissMagic]

I was brought up to believe that a lady should never leave the house for the day without getting dressed and fixing her hair. As a child, my mother would help me style my hair every morning (I rocked that once-popular for children bob with bangs that had to be fluffed and curled every day), and on the rare occasion that my mother wasn't going to be with me in the mornings, that was my biggest concern - how was I going to blow dry my hair?

 

I feel the most comfortable when I look my best. So I guess you could say that I do "dress to impress." However, I dress nicely for myself - not really for anyone else. That's not to say that I won't be seen without makeup, but for the most part, depending on what I'm doing, I want to look and feel put together.

 

That being said, my boyfriend loves that I dress nicely on a daily basis. He's told me this many times over the past four years. He tells me when he likes my outfit, notices when I have a new pair of shoes. He'll also point out other girls' outfits on occasion and tell me what they're doing wrong (this is only if he finds something extremely disturbing about it). This may have something to do with his own personality - I wouldn't call him metro, but he's always cared a lot about his clothing, no matter what style he was into at the time - when I first met him, he was wearing Hurley and Quicksilver shirts... then it became exclusive Fox racing... and now he's decked out from head to toe in Ralph Lauren.

 

Clothing and appearance is something he cares a lot about himself, so of course he's going to care about it with me. I think he would be deeply disappointed if I started going everywhere in sweatpants and t-shirts. He'd probably be a little embarassed to be seen with me. And I don't blame him because I feel the same way. We're just compatible on that level.

[meggie711]

As any of you who have ever seen my pictures know, I always 'dress to impress', even when I'm more casual. But I don't dress to try to impress other people, I just like to take pride in my appearance and I feel good when I think I look nice. What I wear or how I look might not be everyone's cup of tea but if it makes me happy why not?! I also see no reason why you can't dress up and still be comfortable. It's just a case of wearing what is right for you - I know not everyone would be happy in my 5 inch platform heels but I am and I love my shoes so I wear them if I get chance!

 

I would also put time and effort in if I'm doing something with a partner, because I would want to look nice for them. Not because they (or I for that matter) think I should but because I think it's good to make an effort for someone you care about. Though saying that I'm not someone who would leap out of bed at the crack of dawn to do my hair and put on a full face of make-up before my partner wakes up - I look the way I do and if they don't like me au-natural then they probably aren't the one for me.

 

I do think it is easy for people to get a bit lazy though and stop bothering. Again, not that I think they should dress up for other people, but for themselves too. It's different things that matter to different people, but most you ladies will know what I mean about how good can feel from wearing a new outfit/ having your hair done/ getting a manicure. And of course it is always nice to get a compliment off someone or see the smile on your partner's face when you have pulled out all the stops for them.

 

I don't think age comes into it either, there is no such thing as getting too old to bother! I have seen plenty of women who are very young but take no care with their appearance or older ladies who look immaculate and very elegant. My mum is almost 60 and looks amazing, and my grandma still took great pride in her appearance even though she was well into her 70's.

 

I know I will probably get loads of responses about being vain, comfort is important, looks aren't everything etc but these are just a few thoughts from me on the subject! :)

Well said, I agree!

[Creole Girl]

Yes, I dress to impress. It is not for other passengers, but for how it makes me feel to be put together. When you look good, you feel good. I like to present myself well in public. I also want my husband to admire the view, and I love his compliments. I am very much into hair and makeup. If someone else is not, than that is their business. I just know what is acceptable for myself. Beauty comes in all shapes, sizes, and makeup colors!

[Steamboatin]

No

 

Bring old clothes and throw them away once worn a couple of times aboard the ship.

 

Bring empty suitcase home.

[cb at sea]

I dress to impress.....I want to look good! Hubby likes for me to look good! That doesn't mean I wear a tiara nightly....just that I do take some pains with my appearance for times when it's appropriate. I don't go to the pool in my heels and full make-up!

[Silvery Seas Cruiser]

I'm hung up here on the word "impress" and its connotation. I feel that it is very hard to know how to dress to impress others, particularly starngers, because as the very long thread here last week showed, people have such a wide variety of tastes and likes and dislikes in clothing and styles.

 

What impresses one person may turn off another and not even be noticed by yet another. It takes a lot to impress some folks. Or should I say, different clothing impresses different people?

 

What I try to do is be clean, neat and not outlandish. I try to avoid attention-getting clothing. I don't want to be frumpy or dowdey either, but no one would call me fashion-forward. I tend toward practical attire. I never set out to deliberately try to impress anyone. That is really hard to do unless you know someone quite well and know what they like.

Edited December 5, 2012 by HeavySurf

[sherilyn70]

What impresses one person may turn off another and not even be noticed by yet another. It takes a lot to impress some folks. Or should I say, different clothing impresses different people?

 

I completely agree. Neither my husband nor I like women that wear a lot of makeup or spend a lot of time doing their hair. The ribbon on a package doesn't impress us but rather the contents. When we see women that are "dressed to impress" a few things come to mind, such as high maintenace, too expensive to keep around, or vain. The same applies to these metro men as well.

[luckycruzer]

I really do not care who, if anyone is impressed, or not!.. I dress for my body type, my age, my hair colour, ease of clothing after a full dinner, pack-a-bility, laundry of my garments, and have all my own self designed / and crafted jewelry, and my refurbed evening bags to go with. My jewelry for a weeks of attire weighs about 8-12 pounds ( I dont have to be concerned about extra bag charges) So yes, I tote it !

I get loads of comments of the pieces I wear with my attire I have mad it for. Captain Marino had lovely comments @ both my Diamond dinners this past week!, and couldn't believe I had "done" them myself , as did many many ladies on board !!

My things will be on Etsy dot com, as soon as I get setteled down from my cruzen sched. after Christmas. I do have a Flickr page I will be happy to email anyone, but those are my personal pride and joy..and NOT for sale, as they have pieces from my 50 year old collection of jewelry that was sitting in storage. I have new arsenal of Euro fabrics, beads and findings. They are not "yo itty bitty" tiny lil selections. Some weight over a pound!

Edited December 5, 2012 by luckycruzer

[TheDunphys]

Comfort is certainly important. I don't wear high heels because they are uncomfortable to me. But that doesn't mean I'm a slob either. It is totally doable to look attractive, age appropriate, weight appropriate, AND be comfortable. I take pride in at least trying to put myself together before I'm seen in public:p And if I'm in ballet flats instead of 5" heels, my husband still thinks I'm hot:D

 

I'm with you 100%.:)

[TheDunphys]

I completely agree. Neither my husband nor I like women that wear a lot of makeup or spend a lot of time doing their hair. The ribbon on a package doesn't impress us but rather the contents. When we see women that are "dressed to impress" a few things come to mind, such as high maintenace, too expensive to keep around, or vain. The same applies to these metro men as well.

 

And then there are some who genuinely enjoy fashion and dressing as a means of creative expression. I genuinely get great pleasure from putting together my wardrobe that I'll wear on holiday and thinking about what goes with what, pulling out old favourites and mixing it up with the odd new precious purchase. It adds to my holiday experience and is part of the fun of the pre-cruise excitement. The same goes when on-shore. I love visiting local shops on shore and appreciating the creativity of others whether it's a local craft market or a high street fashion store. It's all art to me. Doesn't mean I don't also appreciate the natural beauty of the places we visit. It merely makes life a whole lot more colourful. As an aside it makes my husband's life more colourful too and he appreciates and loves me for it.:)

[Suitcasefull]

I think sometimes, with age, both men and women do give up on appearance which is sad. We all age but can do so gracefully and still try to look like we care about ourselves. I no longer wear heels or short skirts but try to look nice, even if not trendy, and have honed my own style over the years to include things that many people wouldn't choose. They work for me. (LuckyCruzer - would love to see your items! Please send link or info to Suitcasefull at hotmail.com) Even the young with not a huge income can be neat, clean and pulled-together without spending a ton of money. An extra comment: Have never understood folks who go out looking like they have never owned a comb. If nothing else, their scalp has to hurt from those knots!

[luckycruzer]

I've never figgered out how to put the link in my sig, or on here !..enjoy...

[lisanjosh]

I dress for comfort. I'm a jeans and t-shirt kind of girl and he married me anyway, so he must not care if I wear makeup, fix my hair and wear fancy clothes. The only person I need to impress is my husband.

 

 

Lisa and Josh

[nikex]

I think it's just as immature and inappropriate to negatively judge women who "dress to impress" as it is to judge people who dress for comfort. I would never, ever look at a person who was dressed for comfort and assume they are a slob or that they have some character flaw. I think judging a person by their looks whether they're gussied up or dressed down says a lot more about the person doing the judging than anything. I am a little taken aback by some of the comments :(

 

Moving on though.. my normal sense of style is rather "classic" that veers from time to time into retro. I really like wearing dresses because I find them so comfy and they make me feel very feminine. I always make sure I'm put together with hair, makeup, and a coordinated outfit but it's usually simple. I'd say the one way I go "above and beyond" for my husband is that I wear cute nighties to bed, never sweatpants and tshirts. As far as impressing other cruisers, my aim is to keep me and the hubs happy but I love getting inspired by other women's attire or talking shop about styles we like, good deals, etc. My husband is as into fashion as I am so it's always been a feature in our relationship!

[susie8862]

Thank you ladies for such great responses and point of views.

 

Just wanted to clear one thing up..a couple of people did not care for "dress to impress". It was not meant to mean for someone else necessarily. It could be for you also. Really just lack of better words.

 

I think everyone is entitled to do what they want and be who they are. No one here said that if you do not wear make up or do your hair and dress, that you are a slob..... but.....for the lady that had every excuse not to, there was no reason to continuously put down the people that do take the time and effort of caring how we look.

 

Does this make us "vain"..."high maintenance"..."spends a lot of money" I think not and did not think that was very kind at all. How does taking care of your appearance make you vain???? Really?

 

I respect that you do not, but there is no reason to insult all of the ladies here that do.

[sherilyn70]

Does this make us "vain"..."high maintenance"..."spends a lot of money" I think not and did not think that was very kind at all. How does taking care of your appearance make you vain???? Really?

 

And in your own words... dressing up is "impressing" as in those that do not are not doing so. You are implying that those that do not spend hours and hair and makeup and dress up are "unimpressing" and not noticed which is every bit as insulting. There was nothing kind about the title of this thread just as equally.

 

There is a big difference between taking care of your appearance and "dressing to impress". I wash my hair, I blow dry it and keep it clean. I wear properly fitted clothing that is clean and taken care of. But I don't spend more than a few minutes a day and I do not wear makeup 98% of the time. Dressing to impress by most people definitions here seems to make them feel better about themselves and feel more attractive. We should all feel comfortable, accepted, loved and attractive without having to paint and decorate ourselves.

[islandgirlejfan]

And in your own words... dressing up is "impressing" as in those that do not are not doing so. You are implying that those that do not spend hours and hair and makeup and dress up are "unimpressing" and not noticed which is every bit as insulting. There was nothing kind about the title of this thread just as equally.

 

There is a big difference between taking care of your appearance and "dressing to impress". I wash my hair, I blow dry it and keep it clean. I wear properly fitted clothing that is clean and taken care of. But I don't spend more than a few minutes a day and I do not wear makeup 98% of the time. Dressing to impress by most people definitions here seems to make them feel better about themselves and feel more attractive. We should all feel comfortable, accepted, loved and attractive without having to paint and decorate ourselves.

 

Sherilyn....I read all your posts and I think we might be related! ;)

 

In my case, I've never been thin. I've always had to work on just keeping some weight off and the only times I've been close to my goals were when I was pregnant and the other time was almost kicking the bucket due to a uterine tumor! It was decided that I had PCOS and that brought along a myriad of noticeable changes to my outer images, hair growth and hair loss in places I really would have preferred to not have or have. These images in magazines and on television of *what I should be* have never, ever been! :( Due to these things I see day in and day out, my self esteem can be very low even though I totally KNOW my husband loves me for me, and not what I'm always trying to achieve, especially where the weight loss thing is (and that's more of a health concern...mainly bad knees in the family:eek:). I'm now just working on doing what I can with what I have. I'm clean when I go out of the house, I attempt to wear what I feel I look good in. I may have make up on, but I'd say 99% of the time I do not.

 

I seriously have a wonderful hubby who tries to make me feel like Cinderella....I just need to work on getting over how I feel that society views me. At 51, I think what I am is as good as it's going to get!