Table for two etiquette

[Potstech]

"Considering that every one of those places routinely shows up on annual lists of the Top 50 restaurants in the U.S., I would imagine that many people have heard of them and many people have dined there."

 

Considering that most people who cruise do not even get to see any kind of list of the TOP 500 restaurants in the US let alone can afford to go to one in their lifetimes I think we can see the where the problem might be coming from. By constantly referring to some sort of top shelf dining establishment as a comparison to the MDR on a cruise ship and expecting to be treated the same or have the same experience is where this discussion gets itself in trouble. Dining in the MDR is no where near a top 50 restaurant and will never even come close to one. The people who go to the MDR to eat will most likely never be able to afford eating in one of them either so to expect them to act like they are in one is really stretching the imagination.

Edited November 17, 2014 by Potstech

[scubacruiserx2]

Perhaps those people who desire total privacy should Get Smart and order the cone of silence to insure their seclusion .

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bsi-lulN7zA

[babyher]

Perhaps those people who desire total privacy should Get Smart and order the cone of silence to insure their seclusion .

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bsi-lulN7zA

 

 

 

 

*LOL* Love it

[bdjam]

I'm not begrudging you folks from taking a table for two -- you are entitled to any table in the dining room' date=' as am I. I just want to know why the heck you want one when you feel that you wish to engage others around you in conversation -- particularly when their actions should lead you to believe that are not interested in participating. Wouldn't the shared table be a better fit, thereby allowing us antisocial folks our privacy and you friendly folks the banter you seek?[/quote']

Believe me, if you were to demonstrate that you wanted to remain in your Cone of Silence, I wouldn't bother to talk to you. There's a difference between sitting at a table for two and incessantly chattering with the table next to you and an exchange of pleasantries. I guess I will in the future be prepared to have my head bit off if I say a word.

 

In case you haven't noticed, the tables for two are not private. As uncomfortable as some people feel when they are spoken to during their 'private' dinner, I would feel just as uncomfortable not acknowledging someone...especially when I have to squeeze by them to sit down. Really if you value your privacy that much, you shouldn't be eating in a restaurant unless you request a private dining room.

We often ask for a table for 2. When we are seated we acknowledge the diners on each side of us with a friendly hello...common courtesy in my book, considering we are seated so close to one another. We don't intrude further but if one of the other couples wants to engage us in conversation, we happily comply. My husband refers to the people we meet at dinner or on deck or seated next to in the theater, "5 minute friends". Some of those have blossomed into long term friendships, but ALL of them have contributed to the enjoyment of our cruising experience.

This may be the most perfect answer...

Edited November 17, 2014 by bdjam

[Kingofcool1947]

Believe me, if you were to demonstrate that you wanted to remain in your Cone of Silence, I wouldn't bother to talk to you. There's a difference between sitting at a table for two and incessantly chattering with the table next to you and an exchange of pleasantries. I guess I will in the future be prepared to have my head bit off if I say a word.

 

In case you haven't noticed, the tables for two are not private. As uncomfortable as some people feel when they are spoken to during their 'private' dinner, I would feel just as uncomfortable not acknowledging someone...especially when I have to squeeze by them to sit down. Really if you value your privacy that much, you shouldn't be eating in a restaurant unless you request a private dining room.

 

This may be the most perfect answer...

 

Very well put. :)

[Waimea'sMom]

Believe me, if you were to demonstrate that you wanted to remain in your Cone of Silence, I wouldn't bother to talk to you. There's a difference between sitting at a table for two and incessantly chattering with the table next to you and an exchange of pleasantries. I guess I will in the future be prepared to have my head bit off if I say a word.

 

In case you haven't noticed, the tables for two are not private. As uncomfortable as some people feel when they are spoken to during their 'private' dinner, I would feel just as uncomfortable not acknowledging someone...especially when I have to squeeze by them to sit down. Really if you value your privacy that much, you shouldn't be eating in a restaurant unless you request a private dining room.

 

This may be the most perfect answer...

 

Hmm, if you had bothered to read my posts on this subject in this thread, I made it clear that I am never rude - always greet people wth a hello or pleasantries and have often been dragged into conversations with people because I don't want to be rude. I just asked why talkers don't simply sit at a joint table. I still don't have an answer. There are FAR more privacy concerned folks in this thread than me. I am not sure why I was the subject of your rant but okay. :)

[joespin]

We recently sat in front of a famous singer. Sure, it was cool, but we would never consider interrupting his private brunch.

 

 

Sent using the Cruise Critic forums app

 

Once again, the OP and others think it is rude, intrusive, bothersome, etc.,etc, if someone at another 2 top INITIATE a conversation with their table, not the other way around, you initiating the conversation. It is still my contention that if the singer started the conversation you would have engaged and not been annoyed or felt they were being rude.

[shredie]

Once again, the OP and others think it is rude, intrusive, bothersome, etc.,etc, if someone at another 2 top INITIATE a conversation with their table, not the other way around, you initiating the conversation.

 

Some of those posters are leaving the impression that they do not want to be addressed, period. No "hello" even. There are also quite a number of them on this thread who seem to think that everybody they ever encounter on a cruise ship is just DYING to talk to them. This particular group seems to me to be the grouchiest bunch, and I hope I never find myself in the position of happily ignoring them.

[Kingofcool1947]

Some of those posters are leaving the impression that they do not want to be addressed, period. No "hello" even. There are also quite a number of them on this thread who seem to think that everybody they ever encounter on a cruise ship is just DYING to talk to them. This particular group seems to me to be the grouchiest bunch, and I hope I never find myself in the position of happily ignoring them.

 

LOL:D. DW and I experienced this at dinner in MDR on the first night of our last cruise. The couple, about our age (60's) next to us would not even acknowledge, not even with a nod, of a simple "Hello" from me , as we sat down for dinner. They looked at us, said nothing, looked down at their plates, and continued to eat their appetizers. English spoken here and there. So it was not an issue with communication. Good heavens, talk about seriously grouchy curmudgeons? What's up with that? :eek:

 

BTW: DW and I were not interested at all in engaging the couple in chatty conversation during dinner. Just a polite "hello" since their table was next to ours. This went on for the rest of the cruise. We happily ignored them, and enjoyed our dinners for the rest of the cruise. :)

 

I don't get it with some people on a cruise. :confused:

[davekathy]

LOL:D. DW and I experienced this at dinner in MDR on the first night of our last cruise. The couple, about our age (60's) next to us would not even acknowledge, not even with a nod, of a simple "Hello" from me , as we sat down for dinner. They looked at us, said nothing, looked down at their plates, and continued to eat their appetizers. English spoken here and there. So it was not an issue with communication. Good heavens, talk about seriously grouchy curmudgeons? What's up with that? :eek:

 

BTW: DW and I were not interested at all in engaging the couple in chatty conversation during dinner. Just a polite "hello" since their table was next to ours. This went on for the rest of the cruise. We happily ignored them, and enjoyed our dinners for the rest of the cruise. :)

 

I don't get it with some people on a cruise. :confused:

 

Agree. Nothing wrong with a simple hello, a smile and Bon appetit.

[Rick-cruiser]

Blame it on the age of technology/texting.. Some people don't know how (or care) to converse in-person anymore.. The fundamental elements of human interaction and social graces are missing.. I noticed a table for 4 at a restaurant recently where all four people were looking down the whole time texting away..... not even speaking to each other.

 

It's a somewhat bizarre society we're living in..

,

Edited November 18, 2014 by Rick-cruiser

[shredie]

Blame it on the age of technology/texting.. Some people don't know how (or care) to converse in-person anymore.. The fundamental elements of human interaction and social graces are missing.. I noticed a table for 4 at a restaurant recently where all four people were looking down the whole time texting away..... not even speaking to each other.

 

It's a somewhat bizarre society we're living in..

,

 

That's an idea. I'll see if I can text the people next to me at the table for two next door instead of saying "hello." That way I don't have to traumatize them by speaking scary words. :D

[GUT2407]

Perhaps some of the "talkers" at tables of 2 asked for tables of 8 but didn't get them.

[Genessa]

Hmm' date=' if you had bothered to read my posts on this subject in this thread, I made it clear that I am never rude - always greet people wth a hello or pleasantries and have often been dragged into conversations with people because I don't want to be rude. I just asked why talkers don't simply sit at a joint table. I still don't have an answer. There are FAR more privacy concerned folks in this thread than me. I am not sure why I was the subject of your rant but okay. :)[/quote']

 

as others have said, one reason could be that they want to eat at their own pace, not the pace of a larger group.

 

another reason might be that the two people are not actually in complete agreement about the table for two, but were accommodating their companion. For example, on my upcoming cruise I will be traveling with my introverted 10 year old granddaughter. She is not at all comfortable conversing with strangers, and will not even want to exchange hello's. So if you see us, she is not being rude, just uncomfortable. Me, I enjoy sitting at a larger table, chatting with others, but will not do more than say hello or nod to anyone sitting near us, but if they initiate a conversation, I will probably respond.

 

As for why people will even say hello to the people at the next table while on a cruise, when they wouldn't do it in a restaurant, I think it has something to do with being on "vacation" together. I've noticed, whether it is on a cruise ship or a land based resort, that when on vacation people tend to be happier and often friendlier. I live in NY, too, and don't say hello to people I pass on the street, but will acknowledge those I pass in the ship's corridors. Or in the hallway of a hotel. I didn't start out acknowledge those people when I first began vacationing, it happened because I noticed that others said hello to me. Or maybe it's because whenever we're on a cruise, or even a land resort, all the service workers say hello and inspire us?

 

what is more puzzling to me, and it has happened a couple of times, are those who choose to sit at larger tables but don't want to talk. The oddest was when we were seated with a couple who when given the choice to sit at a table for 2 or with others, chose to sit with others. Being right behind them, DH & I ended up getting seated with them. We said hello, they said hello. DH asked them if they had cruised before. They responded with "many times". So I asked them what was their favorite cruise and one of them said "I don't know". We spent the rest of the meal chatting with each other and ignoring that couple, who should have requested a table for 2.

[Guinnessgal31]

My husband and I recently got married and we're doing a Princess cruise as part of our honeymoon. We requested a 2-seat table, and we're really hoping to get one without a chatty neighbor. It's not that we're antisocial--we love making friends when we travel--but it's that we'll be on our honeymoon and the entire point is for us to have time to celebrate our new life together--just us.

 

Personally, I'm with the OP on this one. I'd be a bit irritated if we were seated at a table for 2 and the couple next to us wanted to chat us up the entire time. If we wanted that, we would have chosen a group table.

 

However, if we happen to have a chatty neighbor, I'll just politely inform them that we mean no disrespect but that we're on our honeymoon and that we're hoping to enjoy dinner to ourselves. That may come off as rude, but IMHO, it is far more inconsiderate to infringe on other people's vacations. As previous posters said--you wouldn't necessarily chat up the couple sitting next to you at a restaurant on the mainland. Why would it suddenly be socially acceptable on a cruise ship?

 

Point is--people pay a lot of money for these trips. They should be able to have the vacation that they want. If a couple wants to keep to themselves, they should be able to do so.

Edited November 19, 2014 by Guinnessgal31

[Guinnessgal31]

We spent the rest of the meal chatting with each other and ignoring that couple, who should have requested a table for 2.

 

FYI: It's entirely possible that the couple you mentioned did request a table for 2, but it wasn't available. That happened to my husband and I on two previous cruises. One the first one, we ended up with AWESOME table-mates, so it didn't matter. We had a blast getting to know them. We're still friends to this day.

 

On the other, we ended up with three other couples, all of whom had requested 2-seaters and were unhappy to be at a group table. It was remarkably awkward. We ended up having dinner delivered to our stateroom or eating in the specialty restaurants most of that trip.

[4cats4me]

My husband and I recently got married and we're doing a Princess cruise as part of our honeymoon. We requested a 2-seat table, and we're really hoping to get one without a chatty neighbor. It's not that we're antisocial--we love making friends when we travel--but it's that we'll be on our honeymoon and the entire point is for us to have time to celebrate our new life together--just us.

 

Personally, I'm with the OP on this one. I'd be a bit irritated if we were seated at a table for 2 and the couple next to us wanted to chat us up the entire time. If we wanted that, we would have chosen a group table.

 

However, if we happen to have a chatty neighbor, I'll just politely inform them that we mean no disrespect but that we're on our honeymoon and that we're hoping to enjoy dinner to ourselves. That may come off as rude, but IMHO, it is far more inconsiderate to infringe on other people's vacations. As previous posters said--you wouldn't necessarily chat up the couple sitting next to you at a restaurant on the mainland. Why would it suddenly be socially acceptable on a cruise ship?

 

Point is--people pay a lot of money for these trips. They should be able to have the vacation that they want. If a couple wants to keep to themselves, they should be able to do so.

 

Gee, the good old days. I remember those days.... Gazing into one another's eyes,

But if anyone gets an inkling that you're on your honeymoon, they'll want to chat you up all night:eek:

 

It's awfully hard to avoid others at dinner on cruises. Trust me, one day you'll want to sit and talk with other people after you've been married for a long time. :D;)

Edited November 19, 2014 by 4cats4me

[GUT2407]

What I find really strange is that you cram 700 people in shoulder to shoulder, who are sharing an experience, visiting the same places every day and then some seem to think that they shouldn't even say hello to each other:confused:

[Lovetocruiseprincess]

What I find really strange is that you cram 700 people in shoulder to shoulder, who are sharing an experience, visiting the same places every day and then some seem to think that they shouldn't even say hello to each other:confused:

 

It's not saying just hello sometimes but it turns in a whole meal conversation. We talk all day long to many people we meet but at a table for 2 we like some time to talk to jut one another & not discuss the days events. There are plenty of tables to do just that.

[Genessa]

FYI: It's entirely possible that the couple you mentioned did request a table for 2, but it wasn't available. That happened to my husband and I on two previous cruises. One the first one, we ended up with AWESOME table-mates, so it didn't matter. We had a blast getting to know them. We're still friends to this day.

 

/QUOTE]

 

they had not requested a table for 2. We were standing right behind them and heard them ask for a table with other people. That was the odd thing.

[RocketMan275]

I noticed on my last Emerald Princess cruise a number of people requesting a table for two, no sharing, getting their table for two, and then proceeding to talk to the couple sitting next to them for the entire meal.

 

If people wish to talk to others, should they ask for a sharing table so that a table for two is more available for those who really want a private meal?

 

One could interpret this post in another way: two tops are limited and often two tops are not always available for those who want them; therefore only those who want a private dining experience and do not wish to socialize with their neighbors should request two tops. Viewed this way, the discussion is not about whether it is proper to converse with their neighbors but whether you should be more considerate of those who might make better use of a more private table.

[srlafleur]

We just returned from a cruise on which we requested a 2-top every night. Most nights our table was situated inches away from the next table. On a couple of occasions we chatted a bit with the next table, and most nights we simply acknowledged them as they were being seated (and vice versa).

I don't know how it happens, socially/psychologically, but somehow it seems natural to strike up a bit of a conversation with some people and not with others. Of course, there are always some people who don't "get" the cues - the "don't talk to me" vibes, but I haven't experienced that very often.

The nice thing with a table for two is that there is nothing rude about NOT conversing with the next table if you don't want to.

Edited November 19, 2014 by srlafleur

[mina]

It really is polite to acknowledge people sitting so close to you. We usually nod and return to our private conversation. Unfortunately, we have had more negative then positive experiences in doing so. Those who want to talk the whole dinner time to a very disturbing experience in the Crown Grill. In this case, we were seated closely to a well dressed couple at a table for two on the first night of the cruise. DH was wearing dockers and I was acceptably dressed (in reference to the jeans thread). I am a "bit" fluffy. This couple observed and commented to each other on what we were eating. This well dressed sixtyish man even made "oinking" and "mooing" sounds directed at our table. What a way to ruin an evening. (by the way, I had the small filet with lobster, in case you were wondering.) So, please excuse me if I do not go out of my way to converse with strangers beyond a simple hello.

[Potstech]

I know exactly how I would have handled that and it would not have been pretty.

[JimmyVWine]

This couple observed and commented to each other on what we were eating. This well dressed sixtyish man even made "oinking" and "mooing" sounds directed at our table.

Holy crap!!