Friends backing out on cruise week before final payment

[SadieN]

Well to begin I did not force them to go I said hey what about a cruise? I got a good rate. I'm talking 171 pp when it comes down to it. I'm the only one flying in everyone else is already living in Florida. The wedding is in Florida. Both women are in the wedding and I've been friends with one since I was in 7th grade the other a sophomore in high school and she is also my sons god mother. I even offered for that same person if she didn't have money I'd pay for her dress blah blah. I'd bend of backwards for my friends. I asked their opinion on every decision, even about this trip. Also, suggesting to stay within the U.S.A. They picked the time frame for this trip and when it was gonna be...dresses and what everyone could afford. I know my wedding isn't the only thing going on in their life. But wow.

 

 

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Thank you. Now we know the background story.

[Budget Queen]

I say with the slash because every time I call in I have either a interline rate or a early saver from rep lol

 

 

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Well you booked under one or the other, not both. And if you are eligible for interline, why are you paying for a flight? There's a lot of flights between Houston and Florida.

[Desinico]

Well you booked under one or the other, not both. And if you are eligible for interline, why are you paying for a flight? There's a lot of flights between Houston and Florida.

 

 

I didn't have to deal with having to be on stand by and not making it on my flight. Especially during the holidays it's more then ridiculous. At the time I'd rather be safe then sorry. But I guess I'll be d...ed anyway if this goes up in flames.

 

 

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[Desinico]

Maybe there is ONE friend who would jump at the chance to go with you - not any from the original group who are now backing out, but someone else.

 

 

 

You've already paid for the plane ticket and the cruise is only $171pp. Maybe ask around to other friends or family members (sister, mom, cousins)? You may still salvage your cruise!

 

 

I've asked everyone and everyone has made plans already or it's to close to come up with the money....

 

 

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[Desinico]

I have no advice to add, but I wanted to give you a (((hug))). People suck sometimes. :(

 

 

Thank you. Yes very true.

 

 

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[bakersdozen12]

I have no advice to add, but I wanted to give you a (((hug))). People suck sometimes. :(

 

Same here. Sorry your bachelorette party is getting ruined. I think that your friends should have either been more honest with you from the start, or they should have thought harder about whether they wanted to go (or could afford to go, whatever the reason is).

 

In any case, the silver lining here is that at least you booked during the $50 deposit sale. You would have lost $50 anyway, and at least now you are not losing any more money. Can you at least get a travel voucher from the airline if you cancel your flight?

 

Or can you still fly into Florida and perhaps plan a different type of bachelorette party that your friends can participate in? I think it's more important to have that party to remember, so you can think fondly of your friends, rather than to go on a cruise alone.

[FloridaMommyof3]

I can't offer any guidance but I have to say with friends like that I'd be retracting some invitations. No one should commit to a trip like that only to back out at the last minute. It's extremely rude and unfair. If you can't afford it, say "no" right up front and don't ruin someone else's plans.

[Desinico]

Same here. Sorry your bachelorette party is getting ruined. I think that your friends should have either been more honest with you from the start, or they should have thought harder about whether they wanted to go (or could afford to go, whatever the reason is).

 

In any case, the silver lining here is that at least you booked during the $50 deposit sale. You would have lost $50 anyway, and at least now you are not losing any more money. Can you at least get a travel voucher from the airline if you cancel your flight?

 

Or can you still fly into Florida and perhaps plan a different type of bachelorette party that your friends can participate in? I think it's more important to have that party to remember, so you can think fondly of your friends, rather than to go on a cruise alone.

 

 

There's a change fee if I cancel my flight. I'd probably just go to Florida to go visit my family that lives there. I already have my vacation approved. But, I wouldn't plan anything else. If the cruise doesn't happen I don't want a bachelorette party at all nor do I want bridal shower. I'd be totally over all that at that point.

 

 

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Edited October 5, 2016 by Desinico

[Island Hopping]

If all you have is $50 invested in the cruise, count it as lesson learned and get new friends.

[crusinthrough]

Totally agree- I think it's very selfish to have a destination wedding and put your friends and family in a difficult situation. Finances and ability to take time off are sometimes difficult. I'm sorry but I don't want to spend my entire year's worth of vacation going on Your Cruise Wedding! (Not addressed to OP- but in genereal)

 

 

 

Brides stop planning these destination Bachelorette parties. As a bridesmaid WE DO NOT HAVE THE MONEY TO ATTEND! Im sure you friends had every intention of going on the cruise but life happens. They're probably having to choose between being in the wedding or going on the cruise. They're choosing being in the wedding. Thank goodness they're only losing $50.

 

Cancel the cruise and have a girl's night out for your Bachelorette party. You have learned a valuable lesson.

 

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Don't go if you can not afford to go or don't want to go. There is no obligation to attend a friend's destination wedding.

 

 

 

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[Desinico]

Don't go if you can not afford to go or don't want to go. There is no obligation to attend a friend's destination wedding.

 

 

 

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Idk where they got destination wedding. It's a bachelorette party that's the only thing going on on this trip.[emoji849]

 

 

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[adriennerm]

If I were in your shoes, I would cancel before losing anymore money. I understand that you want to go on a cruise but if they seem "flaky" I would cancel before final payment. At least you can get the money you invested returned. Cruises will always be around.

 

 

I'm sorry your friends didn't express their feelings to your earlier. However, as we all know, people aren't perfect. They could have had the best intentions in the beginning. A vacation always sounds like a great idea until it's time to start paying. At that point reality hits you like a ton of bricks.

 

 

I say this to advise you not to write-off your friends just yet. I would call them directly and ask what's going on b/c it's close to the final payment date.

 

 

Until you ask your friends kindly but directly you never know if it's financial, childcare, vacation time at work, fear of open water or what.

Edited October 5, 2016 by adriennerm

[njmomof2]

If you already have your air paid for to fly into FL, and the rate pp is only $171, is there ANY WAY you can come up with some of the money and have your mom join you? I know you said in your first post that she backed out due to financial difficulties, and for whatever other reason, the other girls did too, but for me, if this was going on, I might just try to come up with the extra and have mom come with me.

 

I know you're planning a wedding, which is a huge financial commitment regardless of how big or small it is going to be, but maybe she can figure out a way to split the extra fare with you and she can cover 1/2 of her cost and both of you can sail.

 

Just a thought. I'm so sorry that they all ended up flaking on you after you purchased air, which, unless you're flying SW, means mostly non refundable or big change fee. Kind of thoughtless of them. But whatever, it's done. Try to make the most of it if possible.

[Flamencacha]

Brides stop planning these destination Bachelorette parties. As a bridesmaid WE DO NOT HAVE THE MONEY TO ATTEND! Im sure you friends had every intention of going on the cruise but life happens. They're probably having to choose between being in the wedding or going on the cruise. They're choosing being in the wedding. Thank goodness they're only losing $50.

 

Cancel the cruise and have a girl's night out for your Bachelorette party. You have learned a valuable lesson.

 

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If you can't afford to be a bridesmaid or attend a bachelorette party etc.. YOU SAY SO. You don't wait til a week prior of final payment. It's about the Bride. Not everyone else.

 

 

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[Desinico]

If you already have your air paid for to fly into FL, and the rate pp is only $171, is there ANY WAY you can come up with some of the money and have your mom join you? I know you said in your first post that she backed out due to financial difficulties, and for whatever other reason, the other girls did too, but for me, if this was going on, I might just try to come up with the extra and have mom come with me.

 

 

 

I know you're planning a wedding, which is a huge financial commitment regardless of how big or small it is going to be, but maybe she can figure out a way to split the extra fare with you and she can cover 1/2 of her cost and both of you can sail.

 

 

 

Just a thought. I'm so sorry that they all ended up flaking on you after you purchased air, which, unless you're flying SW, means mostly non refundable or big change fee. Kind of thoughtless of them. But whatever, it's done. Try to make the most of it if possible.

 

 

I would love to pay for my mom. But I can't swing that this close. Out of all the ppl going she's who I wanted to come the most. I still have a lot of wedding stuff and deadlines to meet. With double occupancy we'd be looking at 305 pp with tax and port expenses. Not even including gratuities yet.

 

 

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[jdemps]

It's crazy how $200 can't be found somewhere to go ahead and get this cruise done by everyone involved that lives in FL. It makes me think something else is happening like work schedule, kids, etc.

 

I hope it works out and you are able to salvage friendships after this alt minute flake.

[cynt]

Desinoco thx for the background info and a little insight on the situation.

 

Im sure your friends want to go on the cruise. At $171 heck if I knew you I would take their place. But life happens. I don't think they're being mean or feciuos. I think things happened financially and they had to make a hard decision. Its $171 for the cruise. Add excursions, gratuity, drinks, incidentals, cruising clothes and that can add up to $400-500 easily.

 

It sucks but it is what it is.

 

Don't let this ruin your special day. Have a heart to heart talk with them to clear the air. If they're your true sister friends the truth will come out on why they have to cancel. Try and make the most of it.

 

Take those lemmons life just tossed you and add some white wine, vodka, sprite n raspberries and make a lemon n raspberry spritzer and party like a ROCK STAR with your friends. Years from now you n your girlfriends will look back at this and laugh.

 

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[madiaka]

Desinoco thx for the background info and a little insight on the situation.

 

Im sure your friends want to go on the cruise. At $171 heck if I knew you I would take their place. But life happens. I don't think they're being mean or feciuos. I think things happened financially and they had to make a hard decision. Its $171 for the cruise. Add excursions, gratuity, drinks, incidentals, cruising clothes and that can add up to $400-500 easily.

 

It sucks but it is what it is.

 

Don't let this ruin your special day. Have a heart to heart talk with them to clear the air. If they're your true sister friends the truth will come out on why they have to cancel. Try and make the most of it.

 

Take those lemmons life just tossed you and add some white wine, vodka, sprite n raspberries and make a lemon n raspberry spritzer and party like a ROCK STAR with your friends. Years from now you n your girlfriends will look back at this and laugh.

 

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I agree. Take it from someone that lost a best friend during my wedding. It's not worth it. Vent and discuss the situation with them and how you feel about it, then forgive and move on. If they are true friends then they are worth keeping - in spite of their current actions.

 

Congrats and enjoy the future planning and events.

 

 

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[debster11]

Well to begin I did not force them to go I said hey what about a cruise? I got a good rate. I'm talking 171 pp when it comes down to it. I'm the only one flying in everyone else is already living in Florida. The wedding is in Florida. Both women are in the wedding and I've been friends with one since I was in 7th grade the other a sophomore in high school and she is also my sons god mother. I even offered for that same person if she didn't have money I'd pay for her dress blah blah. I'd bend of backwards for my friends. I asked their opinion on every decision, even about this trip. Also, suggesting to stay within the U.S.A. They picked the time frame for this trip and when it was gonna be...dresses and what everyone could afford. I know my wedding isn't the only thing going on in their life. But wow.

 

 

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You don't need to explain yourself, I feel so bad for you as I have been in tht situation before. I say go! Have a great time and also have a great wedding.

[iuki]

I'm confused. With RCCL you get a full refund ( except for paid insurance) if you cancel before final payment.

 

Did you book with a TA or directly with Carnival?

 

Go alone rather than lose your money. You can still have a fun time.

[cruizinisthebest]

I'm confused. With RCCL you get a full refund ( except for paid insurance) if you cancel before final payment.

 

Did you book with a TA or directly with Carnival?

 

Go alone rather than lose your money. You can still have a fun time.

She booked with a non refundable rate. The deposit was only $50 because she booked during a reduced deposit promotion. Unlike Royal, Carnival offers several fare types and often run deposit specials.

 

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[ReRe71]

OP, I am so sorry this is happening to you. From someone who is planning a wedding now, I would be absolutely livid if my "friends" bailed on me. Not to speak ill of your friends/family, but the $50 deposit lures people in with a quickness, and then when it's time for final payment they can't make it. And for those posters that say that it's selfish to plan a destination wedding/bachelorette party, whatever...when you are asked to be in a wedding you know there are financial obligations involved. You can always say no. And it sounds to me like the OP picked a destination (cruise ship) that was budget friendly for her and her group.

 

Would I still go? Not sure as I've never cruised alone before. I would probably eat the $50 and just go to FL like you mentioned. It's not the party you wanted but why sulk at home for days? If I knew you I would go! :).

[EllaDuChien]

So funny you brought this up...I booked a cruise on Carnival even though I have never sailed them before, because a girlfriend wanted to have her wedding planning/bachelorette party on a cruise. So I booked it. Booked my airfare, my hotel everything.

 

Then SHE cancelled!! Now, my situation is a bit different, I was already going as a solo, so I knew what my fare was going to be. Also, she cancelled well before final payment so everyone had plenty of time to adjust plans if necessary. But I am going to go anyway! As it happens, its my birthday weekend also so it is my present to myself!

 

I really do hope you get this worked out, and you get to enjoy whatever the end result.

[trihawks1]

Good luck with everything. My daughters BF had to back out two weeks prior due to work. We were able to take his name off she had the cabin to herself and no cost difference since I had paid for the BF. But this was on Royal Caribbean. Yes technically I was out the cost of the BF but I was lying either way. Sorry things happened. I ended up not going too bc I broke my leg and elbow in a fall. Thank goodness I had trip insurance and got all of my money back for over $3000.

 

 

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[DnseinPhx]

I would also go and enjoy yourself, however I would be minus some friends unless it was a health issue or something valid.

 

We planned a cruise once with another couple and thought we were great friends. She emailed me telling me her husband was going to ask some of his family to go as well. I politically let her know that this was just a friends cruise and didn't want it to be a family reunion and if he could do it another time. It was unbelievable, no matter how nice or how I phrased it her answer was always that she couldn't control who booked...or who he asked! :rolleyes: It ended up being the 4 of us, but I cooled the friendship after that.