Bringing your teenagers friend....

[mml100]

Hi all! We offered to bring one of our teenagers friends on our upcoming cruise and I’m starting to wonder if it was a mistake. They’re teenage girls and the friend can be kind of bratty at times. 

 

Anyone have good experiences bringing a friend with you on a cruise?

[scpirate]

That's going to be tough.i am doing the same in December but then my wife gives her hoodlums free reign.all they have to do is check in at breakfast .they did not get in any trouble because apparently everyone else turns their kids loose too so they formed their gangs and did what they do.only problem I had is carnival let them charge stuff on their account then every 2 days guest services would page me to pay their bill even though I told them they had no charging privileges.i f they look for trouble they can find it even on the ship.good luck is all I can tell you.

[bowlinmoe]

They're teenage girls.  It'll be okay.  I'm sure they will fight at times and quickly make up.

I would just tell your daughter to be patient and mature if the friend gets bratty.

[GTO-Girl]

1 hour ago, mml100 said:

Hi all! We offered to bring one of our teenagers friends on our upcoming cruise and I’m starting to wonder if it was a mistake. They’re teenage girls and the friend can be kind of bratty at times. 

 

Anyone have good experiences bringing a friend with you on a cruise?

 

The only advice I can offer is be sure the friend had proper documentation to board the ship and that you take possession of it before you pull out of your driveway.

 

I would also have a signed and notarized letter from the parents giving you permission to take their child on this cruise and to make medical decisions for her.

 

And for those who are ready to say a letter is not necessary......when taking my granddaughters on cruises I was asked for a letter three different times.  Once on Royal, once on Disney and once by Customs!!  I would must rather be safe than sorry.

 

 

Edited February 7, 2019 by GTO-Girl

[Out of Iowa]

Sit the girls down and be clear in your expectations:  what time they must be in the cabin to sleep at night; whether they are obligated to meet you for lunch (or dinner in MDR) each day; what their spending limits are; no going to other people's cabins/no guests in their cabin, rules for excursions/getting off ship in port, etc.  Make sure they understand the ground rules and reiterate them again on the way to the Port.

 

Yes, we have taken high-school friends. Be sure you know the teen guest is flexible and "travels well."  Perhaps begin with a long weekend in a nearby big city and see how that goes?

 

Have a nice trip!

Edited February 7, 2019 by Out of Iowa
expand safety info

[emoorehead]

4 minutes ago, GTO-Girl said:

 

The only advice I can offer is be sure the friend had proper documentation to board the ship and that you take possession of it before you pull out of your driveway.

 

I would also have a signed and notarized letter from the parents giving you permission to take their child on this cruise and to make medical decisions for her.

I was going to say EXACTLY the same thing.

[bury me at sea]

Have a Plan B in writing with the friend's parents regarding penalties/fees in case the friend decides not to go, and in case your child rescinds the invitation.

 

Others have reported taking the friend of a child where all ended well.  Some have reported pretty bad experiences.

 

I would never have done it simply because vacation time was always family time, even when my kids were teenagers.

[octcruise10]

I have taken a friend with my daughter for the last 7 cruises (since my daughter has been 10 she is now 17) . We have never had a problem. There is so much to keep them busy there isn't enough time to argue. Who can be bratty when they are cruising? I do however bring a letter like someone else said just in case.Good luck and have fun!

[bingomamma19]

25 minutes ago, scpirate said:

That's going to be tough.i am doing the same in December but then my wife gives her hoodlums free reign.all they have to do is check in at breakfast .they did not get in any trouble because apparently everyone else turns their kids loose too so they formed their gangs and did what they do.only problem I had is carnival let them charge stuff on their account then every 2 days guest services would page me to pay their bill even though I told them they had no charging privileges.i f they look for trouble they can find it even on the ship.good luck is all I can tell you.

well...you sound like a peach to be married to.  

[bingomamma19]

1 hour ago, mml100 said:

Hi all! We offered to bring one of our teenagers friends on our upcoming cruise and I’m starting to wonder if it was a mistake. They’re teenage girls and the friend can be kind of bratty at times. 

 

Anyone have good experiences bringing a friend with you on a cruise?

I haven't on a cruise, but we have on road trips.   I talk personally with the parents and the child...lay out the expectations and the money.    Talk about what will happen if something bad happens and what happens if rules are broken.    Have emergency phone numbers/message info exchanged on both sides. 

 

I also have ongoing talks on the trips with the child.   

 

I have never had any issues by laying everything out upfront.    

[ProgRockCruiser]

Define "teenager" for your particular case.  13-year-olds will have different use-cases than 19-year-olds.  For example, the 19-year-olds will want to, and be able to, get alcohol if they leave the ship at (pretty well all, if not all) non-US ports.  The 13-year-olds will possibly be wanting their chicken nuggets and mac'n'cheese every night.

 

I sort of kid, but really, the advice from the other posters is generally pretty darn good!

Edited February 7, 2019 by ProgRockCruiser

[ProgRockCruiser]

1 hour ago, bingomamma19 said:

well...you sound like a peach to be married to.  

 

Well, some kids are jerks, there is no arguing that.  Sometimes you marry someone, and they have pre-existing kids that are jerks.  They ignore you, because you aren't "Dad".  It does tend to breed a little resentment, especially if Mom doesn't seem to care to "fix it" (which might be why they are jerks in the first place).   I know of several such instances.

[serene56]

will the girls have their own cabin or rooming in with you?   

are they preppy with getting ready for dinner? (id hate to pay that kind of money where most of the afternoon is spent in the cabin getting ready for a meal that lasts 90 minutes     there is only one vanity with a mirror   One plug so both getting ready at the same time---     they could use the shower in the gym area to both get ready.  

a 7 day cruise could feel like a lifetime if there are problems 

[bingomamma19]

49 minutes ago, ProgRockCruiser said:

 

Well, some kids are jerks, there is no arguing that.  Sometimes you marry someone, and they have pre-existing kids that are jerks.  They ignore you, because you aren't "Dad".  It does tend to breed a little resentment, especially if Mom doesn't seem to care to "fix it" (which might be why they are jerks in the first place).   I know of several such instances.

I agree kids can be jerks...but this guy wants to call his wifes kids "hoodlums"  why in the world would you want to be married to someone if you feel that way?   Why would you agree to go on a vacation if you don't like the kids?

 

Also, I have a hard time believing the story about the charging issues.   If he was being called down to "pay their bill" even though they had no charging allowed...then he must be paying cash.   Why put any on at all if there was no charging allowed?  And why keep going down to put more on?  And why not point out to the guest services that no charging was allowed?

 

Just sounds like a bitter guy. 

[CoolOne56]

3 hours ago, Out of Iowa said:

Sit the girls down and be clear in your expectations:  what time they must be in the cabin to sleep at night; whether they are obligated to meet you for lunch (or dinner in MDR) each day; what their spending limits are; no going to other people's cabins/no guests in their cabin, rules for excursions/getting off ship in port, etc.  Make sure they understand the ground rules and reiterate them again on the way to the Port.

 

Yes, we have taken high-school friends. Be sure you know the teen guest is flexible and "travels well."  Perhaps begin with a long weekend in a nearby big city and see how that goes?

 

Have a nice trip!

 

I was going to say the same thing.  Add, stay together.  Things happen on ships as they do on land.

[Willwork4cruises]

We have taken a friend on 4 cruises. Last cruise we took two friends. The girls were 11,13,&14.  It went well. We are taking both friends again this May. 

 

They had their own room. We allowed free time after dinner and always gave a curfew and they had to check in at least once during free time.  I think they mostly behaved. A coworker was also cruising on the same ship and said she spotted them several times, usually just sitting around talking with other kids or playing at the sports square. We did have issues with horseplay and wrestling in the cabin that I had to jump on them.  

 

For us, we have to like the friend too because we are spending a lot of time with them. We also require a passport and permission to travel letters. Also we pay for all excursions and food on ports but the girls are responsible for any extras such as souvenirs, arcade, or milkshakes. Hope y’all have a great time.

 

Amanda 

Edited February 8, 2019 by Willwork4cruises
Addtl info

[Elaine5715]

Lock down the cell phone issues ahead of time, making sure they are aware of the costs of using them onboard and in port.

[Drazil65]

Good Luck, I know why you do it and I get it (DS is 16) but we would not do it only because cruising is family (I do not want to be responsible for someone else's kid(s)), off the grid time for us. 

 

Give the rules up front and the consequences for their actions, determine if you will let them charge on their S&S cards or if a limit will be posted for each girl.  I personally do not think it is responsible (and not really fair to the other people on vaca on the ship many times) to just turn your teens or any kid loose on the ships without continual check in monitoring at several points through out the day.  It can be a free for all on the ships with kids running around with no supervision, I guess (and hope) you are the only person who knows how much rope to give them.  Good Luck! 

[wytygr8]

16 hours ago, scpirate said:

only problem I had is carnival let them charge stuff on their account then every 2 days guest services would page me to pay their bill even though I told them they had no charging privileges.

 

I assume you didn’t pay this.

[BrezQ]

I agree with the tips already mentioned. We've taken friends on vacations and clearly stated our rules about traveling with us. (behavior, staying together, no complaining, and working out issues if they come up) It was our vacation, and we wanted to be able to enjoy it also.  We have a son, so I have NO clue with girls LOL Best of Luck! Happy Cruising!!

[Kevin]

22 hours ago, mml100 said:

Hi all! We offered to bring one of our teenagers friends on our upcoming cruise and I’m starting to wonder if it was a mistake. They’re teenage girls and the friend can be kind of bratty at times. 

 

Anyone have good experiences bringing a friend with you on a cruise?

We have only had positive experiences when bringing friends of our children.

 

Our kids and the guests seem to always be on their best behavior.  The kids were smart enough to understand that we won't keep taking friends if there are problems during the trips.

 

We have taken friends on cruises, RV trips, and theme park trips.  Never regretted any of the trips, not even the RV trip with 4 16 year old girls, 2 13 year old boys, my wife and I in a 32 foot class C RV.

Edited February 8, 2019 by Kevin