Managing Mouthy Travel Companions?

[DirtyDawg]

On 2/13/2020 at 11:37 AM, Cruisingformetime said:

 

When it's your twin brother... 🙂

 

Just make sure you are the beneficiary of his life insurance policies (if he only has one, buy him another) and let him mouth off all he likes.

Problem solved.

 

That solo world cruise it pays for will help with the grieving process. Honest. 😁

[evandbob]

You tawking to me?  Fuhgeddabouttit......NYers can be loud and dominating when circumstances demand a quick resolution, no problem at all.  I can even smile while I put an end to any nonsense.

 

Otherwise, we're just meek and mild - it all depends on how you want to swim with the fishes.

[Joebucks]

It's best to just not book vacation with those who will cause problems / cannot have a good time. They can bring down an otherwise amazing experience

[iancal]

Absolutely.  But some people revel in being martyrs.  Life is too short for that IMHO.

[K32682]

On 2/13/2020 at 11:14 AM, Cruisingformetime said:

This is for those of you who have done world / Europe / Middle East / Asia cruises.

 

Have you ever done so with a traveling companion who simply cannot keep their opinions to themselves, on the ship or off of it? Sex, religion, politics, it doesn't matter. How did you deal with this (preferably without the use of duct tape, although duct tape might be an option....)

 

My approach has been to let him/her run their mouth and not intervene.  I'm not their personal filter and if they offend someone else then it is up to them to manage the consequences.  

[lynncarol]

On 2/13/2020 at 5:36 PM, mayleeman said:

I am fascinated by the idea that boorish loud people would accept coded signals or accept hints ahead of time. Not in my experience. Those work only with people who actually have some degree of self-awareness.

 

That might be ok for the OP's situation, but I have to admit not travelling with them is the only possible approach for way too many people.

Correct. My sister-in-law and I (along with our spouses) travel together a lot and on reflection must admit: Our method works since we all have some self awareness and a lot of affection for each other.  If I disliked her, it would not be worth the effort. 

[That sinking feeling]

On 2/13/2020 at 4:14 PM, Cruisingformetime said:

This is for those of you who have done world / Europe / Middle East / Asia cruises.

 

Have you ever done so with a traveling companion who simply cannot keep their opinions to themselves, on the ship or off of it? Sex, religion, politics, it doesn't matter. How did you deal with this (preferably without the use of duct tape, although duct tape might be an option....)

Is there something wrong with having an opinion on those things and more?

[K32682]

1 hour ago, That sinking feeling said:

Is there something wrong with having an opinion on those things and more?

 

It's not the opinion but how it is expressed, how often it is expressed and the reception from the person to whom it is being expressed.    

[Cruisingformetime]

3 hours ago, That sinking feeling said:

Is there something wrong with having an opinion on those things and more?

You must be either not widely traveled, or very unaware of yourself, to ask this question. Most countries do not offer the freedom of speech or the press that we enjoy in the United States, and in many countries, speaking one's mind on social or political matters is viewed as offensive, none of a foreigner's business, or both. Some countries have lèse majesté laws, and others have laws against foreigners involving themselves in local political events and demonstrations. In either of these cases, expressing one's opinion on social and political topics can get you fined, arrested, deported, or even assaulted. All of these outcomes can ruin a vacation in a hurry, for both you and your traveling companions, and for this reason, it is both wise and discreet to keep your social and political opinions to yourself when abroad. 

Edited February 16, 2020 by Cruisingformetime

[clo]

3 hours ago, That sinking feeling said:

Is there something wrong with having an opinion on those things and more?

Oh I have very strong opinions and don't always stop from speaking up. But in a civilized manner. And if that's not reciprocated I stop the convo...and avoid that person(s). Sounds like OP's brother has some issues with control.

[That sinking feeling]

10 hours ago, K32682 said:

 

It's not the opinion but how it is expressed, how often it is expressed and the reception from the person to whom it is being expressed.    

But as they are travelling companions they must be pretty used to each other.

 

And of course there are occasions when someone else foolishly asks for an opinion then seriously dont like the answer they get.

[That sinking feeling]

7 hours ago, clo said:

Oh I have very strong opinions and don't always stop from speaking up. But in a civilized manner. And if that's not reciprocated I stop the convo...and avoid that person(s). Sounds like OP's brother has some issues with control.

Or maybe the OP is overly sensitive. As are a lot of people who cant handle straight talking.

[K32682]

4 hours ago, That sinking feeling said:

But as they are travelling companions they must be pretty used to each other.

 

And of course there are occasions when someone else foolishly asks for an opinion then seriously dont like the answer they get.

 

It is when the loudmouth starts to express his/her opinions in social settings involving others that the problem arises. 

[That sinking feeling]

6 hours ago, K32682 said:

 

It is when the loudmouth starts to express his/her opinions in social settings involving others that the problem arises. 

I am fairly confident you could give as good as you take. As can I.

[Toofarfromthesea]

16 hours ago, That sinking feeling said:

Or maybe the OP is overly sensitive. As are a lot of people who cant handle straight talking.

 

Yes, but one person's 'straight talking' is another person's boorish bloviating.  

 

There is a wonderful expression that crops up in Victorian literature, notably in Jane Austen novels.  Entering a situation ready to 'please and be pleased'.  That, to me is the adult way to act on a cruise and what I strive for personally.

[Toofarfromthesea]

5 hours ago, That sinking feeling said:

I am fairly confident you could give as good as you take. As can I.

 

Most people don't go on vacation to get into arguments.  But if that is what floats your boat . . .

[zauberflote]

When DS, highly inappropriate at times and with a developmental disability, was 19, we added hime to a family cruise along with his brother and his DGF. Refusing him alone this gift would actually have meant one of us had to stay home.
We all had a great time, DS most of all, but he could have brought himself down at any moment. There are many reasons for people to judge that you must be a boor, and only one of them includes actually being a boor.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[That sinking feeling]

7 hours ago, Toofarfromthesea said:

 

Most people don't go on vacation to get into arguments.  But if that is what floats your boat . . .

I never said that did I?

[That sinking feeling]

Hypocrisy is lost on some on this forum. You all avoid arguments with mouthy individuals yet a lot of you are at the front of the queue pulling up others about their toilet habits or how they dress in the MDR. Not looking for arguments though are you?