Cruise recap - Maasdam E. Carib. 11/30-12/10/12

[Alcarondas]

Even on a good day, Newark, New Jersey looks like a post-apocalyptic dystopia. When draped with a clammy grey blanket of fog, and viewed through eyes that had only hours before been gazing on the sun-drenched strands of of the Caribbean, it was even worse. In the mist, factory smokestacks looked like broken teeth jutting up out of the swamps; the dark hulks of abandoned buildings seemed likely to spew up a stream of axe-wielding zombies to terrorize the few human survivors who huddled in the shelter of the airport's rail station.

 

Zombies or not, one thing was certain: My cruise was definitely over.

 

So let's press the Rewind button and see how we got here. I'll offer up some observations and opinions for the general edification of the Cruise Critic crowd, and respond to questions as opportunity permits.

 

Embarkation Day - Fort Lauderdale. I arrived from my hotel just at the start of "rush hour", when everyone else showed up at once (or so it seemed). The security screening went smoothly and quickly for me, but when I got upstairs to where check-in was going on, things were crowded and getting worse - with the "line" becoming a confused jumble. Eventually, the staff (all of whom were friendly and professional, as far as I could see) began using the boarding-group numbers to call people into the line for the check-in counter, and the situation improved markedly. It was unfortunate that they couldn't have implemented that solution sooner, but in any event I was able to walk directly on board following my own check-in.

 

The Maasdam. I'll admit, I was nervous. It was like seeing a former girlfriend for the first time in ten years. Ms. M. had been my first (cruise ship, that is), and I was wondering if the years had been kinder to her than they had to me. Would she still be as lovely as I remembered? Would she still thrill me as she had done? Would she even recognize me? Many things had changed, but like fashion and hairstyles they were only outward appearances. The soul was still there, and still intact. As soon as I gazed on "Totem", the green glass sculpture in the atrium, the dusts of time fell away and it was as if I had never left. As the trip went on, it became apparent that age had left its mark on her (as it had on me), but the first requisite of love is a willingness to forgive flaws.

 

Said flaws included quite a lot of dripping on the Lido deck - we had no shortage of rain on the first three days, and it seemed that the dome over the Lido pool wasn't as watertight as it once was; the Lido buffet crew were also shuffling buckets to catch drips from the ceiling in the dining area. Once the rain (mercifully) stopped, so did the drips. The A/C system seemed merely adequate; at the coldest setting my cabin (which was otherwise very nice) was habitable, but I wouldn't have liked it any warmer. Most areas of the ship felt about the same. The most serious physical problem came on Sunday night (day 2), when some part of the fire-sprinkler system housed in a compartment opposite my cabin sprung a leak and flooded a swath of the hallway and came in under my door, soaking about 3 feet of the carpet. I was awakened in the middle of the night to the sounds of the crew vacuuming and working in the hall, and I spent the next day with a floor blow-dryer for a roommate. This wouldn't have been bad if I could have spent the day ashore, but due to heavy, long-lastling rains in San Juan, I was pretty much stuck on board. The dryer was gone from my room by Monday evening, but they remained in the hall for another day or two. I received several calls, letters and visits from the front desk and Guest Relations with inquiries and updates, and was gifted with the Dreaded Bottle of Compensatory Wine (a Chilean chardonnay of some sort; fruity and redolent of apples and pears). But as I was saying, love and forgiveness and all that. Bygones. Water under the bridge (no pun intended). On Tuesday the sun came out and all was well.

 

Almost. We had more rocky seas on this trip than I had seen in a very long time. Apparently, the Atlantic was churned up about something, and was visiting its displeasure upon us. The captain even took a southerly route along the coasts of Cuba and Hispaniola to reach San Juan, in order to keep the Bahamas between us and the worst of the waves. Even so, we had a bumpy ride almost the entire time. Once we actually got into the Caribbean Sea itself (on the leg from St. Thomas to Dominica and Antigua), things calmed down a bit, but we never wanted for ocean-motion.

 

The food: Par for the course. The Maasdam's kitchen seemed to be fairly squared away and competent. There were a couple of clunkers, but most MDR meals were up to (and occasionally beyond) expectations. Ironically, the menu selections that seemed to come off the worst were supposedly the creations of HAL's much-vaunted Culinary Council. Either these guys don't live up to their billing, or the kitchen simply wasn't equipped to carry their visions into reality. Of course, the way to make any meal better is to enjoy it in the company of interesting people, and I had no cause for disappointment here - my seven companions all contributed to a delightfully convivial atmosphere, and dinner was always the highlight of the day. (I had fixed-seating dining.) Our table stewards were excellent. As is my custom, I avoided the Lido like the plague. I did, however, have my first-ever meal in the Pinnacle - at lunch on the first sea-day. The food was good, the room was beautiful, and the service was attentive and professional, but leisurely to the point of being slow. I wouldn't rule out going back, but I'm in no hurry to do so either.

 

Entertainment: The Maasdam had the strongest cast of musicians I've ever seen on a HAL cruise. While I didn't go out of my way to attend any performances, just in passing through the ship at prime time I could tell that they were all talented and popular. The string quartet and the sing-along piano guy always played to packed houses, and the mellow solo guitarist and the swingin' lounge-lizard trio in the Ocean Bar balanced out the musical offerings. Whatever you were in the mood for, you could find. Also, this trip featured the best iteration of the HALCats I've ever heard - even the vocalist was good. I didn't do any of the big shows in the main lounge - I'd seen at least two of them before, and with late dining and not being a night-person, I usually wasn't in the mood for an after-dinner show. (The one drawback to being at a table with lots of fascinating folks is that we all talked a lot, and dinner was usually an extended affair.)

 

Ports and excursions: San Juan was a washout, but I'd been there twice before and so was not heartbroken. There were six ships in St. Thomas, including the Enormous of the Seas, and the little ol' Maasdam had to anchor (oh, the shame!) in the harbor for want of dock space. However, although tendering is always a drag, this ended up being a Big Plus, since we were able to drop off right at the little pier in the middle of town. As far as I'm concerned, this is much preferable to being banished out to Crown Bay and having to rely on shuttles and taxis to get into the action. I took a self-guided tour of Charlotte Amalie, wandering the back streets away from the bustle of the waterfront, eventually hiking up to the Blackbeard's Castle area and touring the restored period homes inside. I had no specific plan when I set out, so this became one of those serendipidous twists that make travel so enjoyable.

 

Dominica was next up; I hadn't been there yet, and it's always good to tread fresh ground. In contrast to St. Tom, we were the only ship in Roseau, and the sleepy, out-of-the-way vibe was a welcome change of pace for the slower. I took the river-tubing excursion, which did not disappoint seekers of thrills. I got dunked out of my tube more than once and got my share of laughs and excitement. I was slightly disappointed in that the hectic pace of the river made it hard to appreciate the scenery - the Layou gorge itself was impressive, with sheer stone cliffs soaring up hundreds of feet above the verdant river valley.

 

Antigua, and another first-time port call for me. St. John's and its environs posed a conundrum I couldn't resolve - It was ramshackle and squalid, but in a very neat and organized way. Strange. It was also a real place, with its own agenda and pulse (unlike St. Thomas, which exists purely as a vacation destination). I took an excursion into the interior for a zip-line experience; another first for me. Fun stuff. The best part about taking exciting, adventurous excursions is that one tends to meet exciting, adventurous people, and again I was not disappointed. After a dozen traverses, we had time to unwind at the tour company's bar - the cool breeze on the open-air porch and the view of the forest and mountains around made me want to stay longer.

 

But it was off to Tortola, where I took a day off. I'd been here before as well, but was duly impressed (again) at all the extravagant vacation palaces studding the hillsides like so many precious stones. The sail-in and sail-out were sufficient entertainment in themselves.

 

Finally, after another sea day, Half Moon Cay. Oh, where to begin? Whereas Ms. Maasdam had aged gracefully, HMC seems to be having a particularly petulant and irresponsible midlife crisis. When I was first there, over ten years ago, it was a dramatic, unspoiled sweep of virgin beach. The only development was the little shopping village and the barbecue pavilion. The breeze and the surf seemed to sing a soft duet of complete escape and perfect relaxation. It was too good to last. First came the massage huts. Then the wooden cabanas. Then that appalling pirate-ship bar. Now there are five two-story super cabanas in various stages of construction, with more likely to come. Robinson Crusoe's castaway purity has been replaced with Captain Morgan's commerical tackiness.

 

But worse than the visual clutter was the noise. I walked the entire length and breadth of the island (at least as far as it was open to guests), and never found a spot where I couldn't hear the HALCaterwauling coming from the bar. Just because the band was good doesn't mean I wanted to have to listen to it at all times. Maybe it's just me, but under no circumstances whatsoever does my vision of an idyllic tropical paradise include a stadium-quality amplification system capable of blasting "Love Shack" in high-fidelity to distances in excess of half a mile. In my own tropical paradise, the only sounds to be heard are the wind and the waves, and perhaps the occasional satisfied cooing of an attractive, like-minded companion. While I'm not completely averse to the idea of a party atmosphere, I fail to see why it can't be confined to the bar and its immediate environs. It's really saying something when the most peaceful, quiet and uncrowded place to be is back on the ship. I'm resigned to the fact that henceforth, HMC will be just another sea-day for me.

 

The Crowd: This was a longer itinerary (10 days), and it showed. I was reminded more than once of the good-natured jab that HAL is the cruise where senior citizens take their parents. I saw a handful of children, one teenager, and a few young(er) couples - if that can be defined as people with kids in college. Other than that, it was the Core Demographic. 'Nuff said. Many folks made the effort to keep the Formal in Formal Night, but for the most part it was a very casual sort of formal. But heck, we're on vacation, right? Plus, it makes me easy to spot. I'm the guy who wears a jacket and tie to lunch.

 

Odds and ends: Although I tried not to, I couldn't help comparing the "new" (post-2011 refit) Maasdam to the old one. I liked the new Mix bar area, disliked the truncated Explorer's Lounge (previously my favorite spot), and was quite disappointed in the new library area. While the concept of a more hip, modern internet cafe and coffee bar felt right, the execution was somewhat lacking. I always found the area to be too busy and noisy to be used as a spot for reading and/or relaxing. Coupled with the downsized Explorer's Nook, it was hard for me to find a quiet spot indoors (the piped-in daytime music in the Crow's Nest meant that was out too). A consequence of the addition of the Lanai cabins was that "open" loungers on the promenade deck were at a premium. This was my first cruise ever where I didn't spend a few hours parked with my feet up, watching the sea roll by (although I was able to find plenty of uncrowded spots at the rail, I was constrained to stay on my feet). Somewhere past the midpoint of the cruise, it dawned on me (in a way that felt like a bit of a betrayal) that I prefer the layout and organization of the Vista ships much better. Undoubtedly this is just as well, since we were told more than once by different people (including the captain and hotel manager) that anyone who enjoys cruising on smaller ships needs to enjoy it now; because their days are numbered, and the number is small. Business Reality is rearing its fanged maw.

 

Closing thoughts: I'm not a big fan of giving "stars" - they mean different things to different people. I'll just say that I enjoyed this trip very much and would happily do it again, damp rug and all. I saw some new sights, met some great folks, and had a few opportunities for personal growth - I have a phobia about being wet in public, so the river tubing trip was a nice hurdle to clear. I also wasn't as panic-stricken by the ziplines as I thought I would be - my native stoicism carried me through. Or over, as the case may be. Most of all, my Ten-Years-After date with Ms. Maasdam was a success. She's still a charmer, and the chemistry is still there.

 

Finally, I'd be remiss if I didn't give a shout-out to Anett, of the ship's photography crew. Her buoyant personality and infectious smile were in evidence everywhere. She was on the river tube trip and was obviously having fun, and when she heard that I had been on the zipline tour, she wanted to know all about it since she didn't have a chance to do that one. She also never missed a chance to try to take my picture (her job, after all), but I was resistant; the last thing I need is another glowering portrait of my ugly mug - I've got mirrors at home and I'm well aware of my aesthetic shortcomings. Finally, on the last formal night, I (half) jokingly suggested that the only way I'd get my portrait done would be if she were in the picture with me. To my everlasting astonishment and delight, she gleefully dragged me over to where her partner was working and stood for what turned out to be a very nice picture in front of the Totem sculpture. You know that a woman is singularly attractive if she can make even me look good. Thus I ended up with the best and most fitting souvenier of all - me in the company of two lovely, charming ladies - Ms. Anett and Ms. Maasdam.

 

Thanks for reading! I hope to see you all out there again some time soon.

[rucrazy]

Thank you I enjoyed the read.

I appreciated your observations..

Joseph

[monina01]

wow. I mean really. Wow. I love your review. The way you write....I could see, hear and feel it. That is not just a review. That is art.

 

thank you so much.

 

(Maasdam was my first as well..and also my only, as of now. I think she's wonderfull....and so sad if the smaller ships are going to disapear. why? :().

[vicocala]

I too enjoyed your review. Thank you very much and it is sad to hear of yet another ship that is springing a leak somewhere she doesn't need one. I enjoyed your writing style.

[KirkNC]

Thanks for the review, glad things went well! Glad the firs system did not wash you out to sea ;).

[Krazy Kruizers]

Thank you for taking the time to write such a wonderful review.

In spite of the damp rug, glad you had a wonderful cruise.

[Copper10-8]

Really enjoyed your review and writing style! I showed your comments to Anett from Hungary and she says thanks and hi. Take care and be safe!:)

[Alcarondas]

wow. I mean really. Wow. I love your review. The way you write....I could see, hear and feel it. That is not just a review. That is art.

 

thank you so much.

 

(Maasdam was my first as well..and also my only, as of now. I think she's wonderfull....and so sad if the smaller ships are going to disapear. why? :().

 

 

Simple answer: Money.

 

The smaller ships just aren't pulling their weight on the balance sheet. And it's not just HAL - according to a source that I considered to be extremely reliable, most if not all of the small-ship lines are losing money, including Oceania, Regent, and Silversea. The difference, according to my source, is that those lines are all owned by (in his words) "billionaires with big egos", who don't mind throwing millions of dollars away on a pet project. Carnival, on the other hand, is a publicly-traded corporation, whose shareholders predictably demand profitability, growth and return on their investment.

 

New, big ships operate more efficiently and profitably. Thus, they are the future.

[Alcarondas]

Really enjoyed your review and writing style! I showed your comments to Anett from Hungary and she says thanks and hi. Take care and be safe!:)

 

Thanks, Copper! It was a great pleasure meeting you and Mr. Deering at the CC Meet & Greet.

[PathfinderEss]

Really a nice review of your cruise on the Maasdam. I like your easy of acceptance of some of the aging Maasdam problems. Very gracious of you may I say. So much nicer then some of the snipping that happens on this board.

Thanks and glad you had a good cruise.

[RuthC]

Entertainment: The Maasdam had the strongest cast of musicians I've ever seen on a HAL cruise. While I didn't go out of my way to attend any performances, just in passing through the ship at prime time I could tell that they were all talented and popular. The string quartet and the sing-along piano guy always played to packed houses, and the mellow solo guitarist and the swingin' lounge-lizard trio in the Ocean Bar balanced out the musical offerings. Whatever you were in the mood for, you could find. Also, this trip featured the best iteration of the HALCats I've ever heard - even the vocalist was good. I didn't do any of the big shows in the main lounge - I'd seen at least two of them before, and with late dining and not being a night-person, I usually wasn't in the mood for an after-dinner show. (The one drawback to being at a table with lots of fascinating folks is that we all talked a lot, and dinner was usually an extended affair.)

Thank you for a well-written report.

I am interested in the names of the three entertainers I bolded in the above quote. Do you still have that info? It's so helpful to recognize a name when I see them on a schedule.

Thanks.

[Alcarondas]

Thank you for a well-written report.

 

I am interested in the names of the three entertainers I bolded in the above quote. Do you still have that info? It's so helpful to recognize a name when I see them on a schedule.

Thanks.

 

I always save the daily programs, port guides and newspapers - I find they make better and more meaningful keepsakes than anything found in the duty-free shops - so this one is easy.

 

Buddy Mitchell was the piano man

 

Theresa (without surname) was the guitarist

 

The rock band was advertised as "Lynn and the HALCats" - a 6-piece combo with women on vocals (presumably Lynn), keyboards and saxophone, and men on guitar, bass and drums.

 

And to complete the historical record, the string quartet and jazz trio had the usual generic names of Adagio Strings and The Neptunes; the former were four women from Hungary, and the latter was a woman (British, I believe) on piano, and men on drums and upright bass.

 

We also had DJ Brett spinning tunes in the Crow's Nest.

[Typhoon1]

Thanks for taking the time to share your review.

[RuthC]

Thanks. I know who Buddy is; I like him, and hope to run into him again some day. Never heard of Lynn, but it's nice to read that there's a decent singer with the HAL Cats once in a while. So many of them are beyond awful.

[innlady1]

Thank you for your very thoughtful, well-written review. I loved it!

Interesting because at the Mariner's Brunch, either this past January or the prior one, the Captain said no need to worry - the S class ships would be around for a long while. So, perhaps this is a fairly recent decision.

[superoma]

thanks for an interesting and well written review. We enjoyed the Maasdam before her recent refit. I guess we need to hurry if we want to enjoy small ships.

[sail7seas]

Great Review of one of our two favorite ships. :)

Wonderfully written and a pleasure to read.

Welcome back.

[mamaofami]

I loved your review. Thanks for posting it. Any suggestions for what to do in Antiqua besides zip lining? We'll be stopping there in January on the Ryndam.

 

Again, thanks for writing and I'm glad you had a good time on one of my favorite ships. I'll be so sorry to see the S class ships sold.

[Alcarondas]

I loved your review. Thanks for posting it. Any suggestions for what to do in Antiqua besides zip lining? We'll be stopping there in January on the Ryndam.

 

If I find myself there again, I'd like to tour Nelson's Dockyard and the historic areas there. I'm a big fan of Age-of-Sail history, and I was sorry that the timing of the zipline (in the middle of the day) didn't leave me with enough time to get over there.

 

On a similar note, I was wistful on the night that we travelled from Dominica to Antigua. In passing Guadaloupe, we sailed more or less right over the area where the Battle of the Saintes was fought in 1782. This was the deciding clash between the British fleet of Admiral Rodney (based in Antigua) and the French fleet of Admiral DeGrasse (based in Guadaloupe) - the same fleet which had successfully prevented the British from resupplying Lord Cornwallis, leading to his surrender at Yorktown and the victory of George Washington and the Continental Army in the American Revolution.

 

As the two sides were forming their battle lines, the wind suddenly changed, allowing (or perhaps forcing) Rodney to make the surprising move of charging directly at the French fleet, splitting their line in several places and destroying or capturing many of their ships. The victory sealed British domination of the Caribbean for the next hundred years and more.

[erewhon]

Enjoyed reading your interesting review.

Thank you.

[innlady1]

I loved your review. Thanks for posting it. Any suggestions for what to do in Antiqua besides zip lining? We'll be stopping there in January on the Ryndam.

 

Again, thanks for writing and I'm glad you had a good time on one of my favorite ships. I'll be so sorry to see the S class ships sold.

 

Have you checked the port of call boards yet, Carol? I haven't had a chance but perhaps there's good information there.

[madera1]

Thanks for taking the time to write the review. I enjoyed reading it.

[c-legs]

Simple answer: Money.

 

The smaller ships just aren't pulling their weight on the balance sheet. And it's not just HAL - according to a source that I considered to be extremely reliable, most if not all of the small-ship lines are losing money, including Oceania, Regent, and Silversea. The difference, according to my source, is that those lines are all owned by (in his words) "billionaires with big egos", who don't mind throwing millions of dollars away on a pet project. Carnival, on the other hand, is a publicly-traded corporation, whose shareholders predictably demand profitability, growth and return on their investment.

 

New, big ships operate more efficiently and profitably. Thus, they are the future.

 

and more importantly, ''big '' ships are built at a noticeably lower ''cost per cabin'' than smaller ones....thus HAL's directions for future newbuilds....

As you said: money ( plus Daddy Carnival's constant surveillance....)

Cheers

and thanks so much for your very entertaining and relevent review.

[monina01]

I loved your review. Thanks for posting it. Any suggestions for what to do in Antiqua besides zip lining? We'll be stopping there in January on the Ryndam.

 

We had booked a tour with Adventure Antigua. It was the Ecosafari tour.

The emphasis of the tour was on the ecology and history of the area. We visited the following:

- Mangrove

- Nature Island trail, Great Bird ISland

- North Sound

- Hell's gate.

 

With lunch and drinks.

 

It was wonderful. Truly a great great day(I have youtube collage video of the photo's I made if you are interested. I can email the link if you would like or post the link somewhere...)

[PetNanny]

Thank you so much for writing your review. Really enjoyed it!