Advice to Overseas Cruisers coming to Australia

[lyndarra]

Hey Beanb41 you have just admitted that there is nothing much exciting about NZ so why go there?:)

To see if anything's changed?

[MicCanberra]

Interestingly, I think most of what has been posted would be lost on non Aussies or Kiwis.

[Bpos]

Interestingly, I think most of what has been posted would be lost on non Aussies or Kiwis.

 

I sincerely apologize for my postings and as you are a very very senior contributor to these forums and your advice very much respected, I will confine my further reports to the poor suffering fellow passengers on my roll call (Solstice 30 Oct 2016 sailing)

 

But I do hope you will allow me the opportunity to file one further report as I say goodbye to all the good folk on this specific forum.

[SpainAlien]

No Bpos don't go, I was enjoying your posts and I'm not from Oz or NZ

 

 

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[GUT2407]

I sincerely apologize for my postings and as you are a very very senior contributor to these forums and your advice very much respected, I will confine my further reports to the poor suffering fellow passengers on my roll call (Solstice 30 Oct 2016 sailing)

 

But I do hope you will allow me the opportunity to file one further report as I say goodbye to all the good folk on this specific forum.

 

No Bpos don't go, I was enjoying your posts and I'm not from Oz or NZ

 

 

Sent from my SM-G920F using Tapatalk

 

 

Keep 'em coming.

 

Plenty of sillier threads at times.

[MicCanberra]

I sincerely apologize for my postings and as you are a very very senior contributor to these forums and your advice very much respected, I will confine my further reports to the poor suffering fellow passengers on my roll call (Solstice 30 Oct 2016 sailing)

 

But I do hope you will allow me the opportunity to file one further report as I say goodbye to all the good folk on this specific forum.

 

Sorry but I wasn't having a go, I just meant that most internationals wouldn't understand all the back and forth banter in the posts from all the contributors. Keep it going, it is very good.:D

[MicCanberra]

No Bpos don't go, I was enjoying your posts and I'm not from Oz or NZ

 

 

Sent from my SM-G920F using Tapatalk

 

There you have it, someone from outside our zone and understanding it, so keep it going.:D

[Bpos]

Many overseas visitors from cruise ships like to add on an Australian Adventure at the end/beginning of their cruise to see one or more of the unique and wonderful features of this country we call Australia.

 

One tour that is very popular with tourists, particularly from countries which have a big population and small land mass (think Japan?), is a visit to the Never Never.

 

Unfortunately I have never, never been able to find out exactly where the Never Never is - but reputable travel agents have told me that it is located in the great Australian outback - it has to be somewhere?

 

I cannot recommend a tour I have not taken as per the Cruise Critic rules so my advice to you should you wish to visit the Never Never is to:

 

A. Take plenty of food and drink (preferable beer) with you as you will never never ever find a Big Macs or place to replenish your supplies. Eating the local fauna (ie snakes, lizzards, mice etc) of the area you visit is not permitted. Water will not be available but you can drain your car radiator in an emergency if not treated by coolants.

 

B. Carry plenty of spare fuel for your car if driving to the Never Never and never, and I stress again, never ever go without spare parts for the car and extra tyres as you will be travelling on bulldust roads for most of the trip. Maps of the area will not be available so be prepared to navigate by the Sun and Stars.

 

C. Finally, and this is most important - give the coordinates of your destination in the Never Never to your nearest relative or friend before you depart, in case you never ever return from the Never Never - it has been known to happen. By doing this at least you may be found if you don't come back - dead or alive?

 

We have a wonderful saying in Australia (well it could be Tibetan but I claim if for our own):

 

IF YOU NEVER NEVER GO YOU WILL NEVER NEVER KNOW

 

How about that - how true it is.

 

Observing the above will ensure that you have a trouble free and truely wonderful Australian Adventure not experienced by many including myself and most other Australian as well

[OzKiwiJJ]

First you have to go beyond the black stump ...

[VK3DQ]

Oh Dear all this talk and not one mention of the most dangerous animals in the country , all young ladies visiting Australia should be aware of the WOMBAT

 

 

"WOMBAT --- Eats , Roots and Leaves"

 

 

 

Regards

 

John:p

[MicCanberra]

Oh Dear all this talk and not one mention of the most dangerous animals in the country , all young ladies visiting Australia should be aware of the WOMBAT

 

 

"WOMBAT --- Eats , Roots and Leaves"

 

 

 

Regards

 

John:p

 

Beware, they are normally found near watering holes.

[hitcharide]

There is simple solution to the problems outlined above for visitors to Australia. Give the West Island a complete miss and come across the ditch to GODZONE. We have not poisonous spiders, no snakes, no person eating crocodiles, no animals s to pee all over you. We do have a very welcoming country and peoples. We don't have saucers in our sports cabinets either. We have cups instead.

 

 

Lies I tell you, all lies!!

 

lol you forget about the Croco-pigs! And those horrible Murpheys. And I don't believe we have anything here in Aus that compares to your Aunt Dolly!!!

 

;)

[GUT2407]

Lies I tell you, all lies!!

 

lol you forget about the Croco-pigs! And those horrible Murpheys. And I don't believe we have anything here in Aus that compares to your Aunt Dolly!!!

 

;)

 

Love "The Dog".

 

Now I bet that confuses the tourists.

[2016USAHoliday]

 

B. Carry plenty of spare fuel for your car if driving to the Never Never and never, and I stress again, never ever go without spare parts for the car and extra tyres as you will be travelling on bulldust roads for most of the trip. Maps of the area will not be available so be prepared to navigate by the Sun and Stars.

 

And to provide a great example, we blew 3 tyres over a 300km stretch of dirt road in Queensland heading towards NT. After 14 hours of camping next to our car, finally another car came by!!!!!

[Bpos]

And to provide a great example, we blew 3 tyres over a 300km stretch of dirt road in Queensland heading towards NT. After 14 hours of camping next to our car, finally another car came by!!!!!

 

That must have been a very wonderful and unique Australian Adventure experience for you all, and plenty of exciting stories to tell when you got home - so pleased to hear that you survived

[MicCanberra]

And to provide a great example, we blew 3 tyres over a 300km stretch of dirt road in Queensland heading towards NT. After 14 hours of camping next to our car, finally another car came by!!!!!

 

At least you stayed by the car, many start wandering and get lost only to be found when it is too late.

[Cabansail]

only to be found when it is too late.

 

But they do lose some weight and develop a dry humour.

[2016USAHoliday]

At least you stayed by the car, many start wandering and get lost only to be found when it is too late.

 

Im a born and bread Melbournite living in Perth, so have heard all the warnings to stay in your car.

The main reason we stayed in the car was all the flies!!!!!! Get out of the car and we would be covered in flies.

Great stories to tell of our adventures though!

[GUT2407]

Im a born and bread Melbournite living in Perth, so have heard all the warnings to stay in your car.

The main reason we stayed in the car was all the flies!!!!!! Get out of the car and we would be covered in flies.

Great stories to tell of our adventures though!

 

The principle reason they advise you to stay with your car is that a car is a lot easier to spot than a person.

[MicCanberra]

Im a born and bread Melbournite living in Perth, so have heard all the warnings to stay in your car.

The main reason we stayed in the car was all the flies!!!!!! Get out of the car and we would be covered in flies.

Great stories to tell of our adventures though!

 

Yes, surviving to tell the story is better than the alternative.

[MicCanberra]

The principle reason they advise you to stay with your car is that a car is a lot easier to spot than a person.

 

Correct, also the car offers protection from the elements, Shade during the day and the cold at night, as well as from the flies.

[Bpos]

Im a born and bread Melbournite living in Perth, so have heard all the warnings to stay in your car.

The main reason we stayed in the car was all the flies!!!!!! Get out of the car and we would be covered in flies.

Great stories to tell of our adventures though!

 

I apologise for thinking you were from overseas given the name you use on this forum.

 

Thank you for your timely warning. for someone born and bread in Melbourne (2016USAHoliday's words not mine) you are to be congratulated on using your loaf (Aussie slang for brains) in keeping yourself and family safe in very trying circumstances.

Edited June 3, 2016 by Bpos
spelling and adding something else

[2016USAHoliday]

I apologise for thinking you were from overseas given the name you use on this forum.

 

Thank you for your timely warning. for someone born and bread in Melbourne (2016USAHoliday's words not mine) you are to be congratulated on using your loaf (Aussie slang for brains) in keeping yourself and family safe in very trying circumstances.

 

haha! Yep, good pick up, thank you for picking up on my spelling!!!!! Born and BRED in Melbourne!

[Bpos]

I was asked to give some more specific "insights" to attractions and things to do at Australian ports of call by a fellow cruiser on our Roll Call (Solstice 31 October 2016)

 

I also decided to disclose my source of knowledge of travel ports to assist the cruiser to do his/her own research - I can add those "things" that no- one else likes to talk about or requires the utmost discretion.

 

Darwin is our first Aussie port of call and this is what I said:

 

quote

 

I have a secret to disclose - where do I get my information from and detailed knowledge of things to do and attractions to see when visiting another country or indeed Australia.

 

It all comes from Trip Advisor - truely, it is all there just google "Trip Advisor and the name of the town/city" and up will come all the information you need, things to do. photos, prices, and best of all - reviews from people who have been there, done that

How easy is that?

 

For example, if you google Trip Advisor Darwin you will see the 10th most rated thing to do in Darwin is to visit the Crocosaurus Cove and you can even swim in the Cage of Death at the facility. To swim you will need to book online - cost $125.

 

Essentially, you will be put into a big big glass tube with water. the tube will be lowered into a big pool and huge crocs then released to swim around you in a really up and close personal way - bet you cannot do that anywhere else in the world??? Just have a look at the photos - OMG

 

A few years ago the glass tube did crack but fortunately the tourist was extracted from the water before....... well I leave that up to your imagination.

 

The poor tourist had to get to the toilet immediately afterwards for a change of swimming trunks - if you get my drift. To much information you say - well I like to ensure you are well and fully informed.

 

Fortunately no further incidents have occurred as I understand the glass tube has been reinforced and besides they would have very good indemnity insurance to cover medical/hospital bills and repatriation back to your home country.

 

Now here is a good tip - whilst visiting the Crocosaurus Cove - should you hear a large "Crack", it is unlikely to be the glass tube breaking again - but the famous Australian Stockman "cracking" his whip and driving thousands of cattle and buffalo up the main street of Darwin for loading onto a boat for export to China.

 

This would be an amazing sight to see, it's free of charge but I do recommend you view it from behind a tree or up on top of a nearby building - stampedes can happen.

 

Should the cattle drive not take place during your visit (not done every day) don't dispair. You can see the actual event recreated in that famous Australian movie "Australia" starring Hugh Jackman and the ex Mr's Tom Cruise - Australia's own - Miss Nicole Kidman (not sure why she is still a Miss, she has had been married twice to my knowlege!!!)

 

The movie "Australia" was a huge international hit worldwide a few years ago and should be on every visitors must see movie list before coming to Australia.

 

Goodness, I have just realised that not only am I extolling tourism in Australia, I am now promoting our fantastic movie industry as well.

 

I do hope the above will help you and I may have a couple more attractions in Darwin to discuss before moving on to our other ports of call

 

unquote

[jmckay331]

Okay, ya'll gotta stop. My sides hurt from laughing. So basically I need to wear a rain coat for the koala(not a bear) make sure to eat vegamite and wear bundy so I smell Aussie to deter drop bear, watch out for crocs, crocodile-pigs, wombats, and spiders under toilet seats....got it![emoji23][emoji3]

So here is my advice when in US since ya'll are being so helpful. Watch out for jackalopes, and chupacabre they are extremely dangerous if you aren't prepared with a shotgun. Also make sure you take the time to go snipe hunting one of Americans favorite pastimes right up there with giggin frogs.

Your Welcome [emoji57]

 

 

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