How to talk nicely with Aussies and Kiwis?

[IslandThyme]

I will be down in your part of the world in a few weeks, and am wondering how to be a good guest. Often a simple thing like learning to say terima kasih to your Indonesian cabin steward, or sumimasen when you need help or directions in Japan, can change your whole experience for the better.

 

Are there words or phrases, like the kia ora greeting I get from Air New Zealand, that I can use during my visit to show respect for AU and NZ cultures and people? It's hard to live down the ignominy of being American at this point in history, but I try to do my best.

[Chiliburn]

First of ,don’t tip

Ask the kiwis if they have any pet sheep and how are the all blacks going in the netball.

Ask the Ozzie’s if they have a pet kangaroo and if they know Paul Hogan.

 

 Just be yourself 

 

THIS IS GOING TO BE GOOD 

Edited August 12, 2019 by Chiliburn

[oskarNZ]

IslandThyme - good on you for caring enough to ask.

You can speak only English in NZ and will not offend anyone, but if you want to use Kia Ora it would also be a nice gesture - especially if you make the effort to say it correctly.  In saying that, you’ll hear it said many ways, including quite poorly by kiwis themselves.  

The last 10 seconds of this video might help.

 

 

A few things considered disrespectful are  sitting on tables, desks etc and patting strangers on the head. Try not to dominate conversations by speaking really loudly and read up on a few customs if you are visiting a marae. 

Honestly, the fact that you’d even ask means I’m sure you have nothing to worry about.  Have a great trip.  

[IslandThyme]

When I spoke to an Air NZ guy I specifically asked him to pronounce it for me, since I didn't hear that first a  and I wanted to make sure that it is meant to be silent. I love that little video because I was unaware of the deeper meanings.

 

Is there no tipping at all, under any circumstance, or is it just for exceptional service?

[wally_bushy]

Tipping not required, but welcomed if you receive service you would like to acknowledge

Best advice is to show manners and not treat anyone better or worse than anyone else

You will be more than welcome 

[GUT2407]

Be yourself, don’t try and be anyone else, trying to talk Aussie or Kiwi will just make you look stupid.

 

go into any pub and yell at the top of your lungs ‘My Shout Mate” and you’ll get a lot of friends real quick.

 

Don’t point out all the things that are better (different) in America.

 

You will quickly discover we are on the whole friendly people who love a chat and a bit of fun.

 

 

[Haoie]

Please just be yourself and enjoy the trip.

 

You're not going to Sub-Saharan Africa or something. Our cultures are far, far more alike than different.

[SinbadThePorter]

1 hour ago, IslandThyme said:

Is there no tipping at all, under any circumstance, or is it just for exceptional service?

 

If you happen to collapse in the hotel and the hotel porter revives you with CPR, then I'd say he/she deserves a tip.

 

Just remember that whenever you do tip, you change the expectations of all those who you tip and we who live here have to deal with those expectations.

 

I can't think of any proper job in Oz or NZ that needs to rely on tips to provide workers with a livable wage. To tell the truth I don't think such jobs should exist.

[IslandThyme]

Of course I'll be myself, who else would I be? But, just for example, if you speak to a person in France without first saying bonjour they will be mightily insulted and take you for a boor. If you say ni hao to a person in China they will be pleased that you made the effort. That's what I'm talking about here. The little niceties that make travel more gratifying.

[SinbadThePorter]

1 minute ago, IslandThyme said:

The little niceties that make travel more gratifying.

 

It's a very informal culture. About the only thing you need to do is say please and thankyou when things are done for you and not put on any airs. Don't be abrupt with strangers and if there is a problem, talk it out, don't yell it out.

[GUT2407]

4 minutes ago, IslandThyme said:

Of course I'll be myself, who else would I be? But, just for example, if you speak to a person in France without first saying bonjour they will be mightily insulted and take you for a boor. If you say ni hao to a person in China they will be pleased that you made the effort. That's what I'm talking about here. The little niceties that make travel more gratifying.

Not needed, if you go saying G’day Mate in a Yank accent they’re likely to think you are having a go at them, if they are confused by something you say they will ask, you do the same I have known some Americans who have trouble with some of our lingo. Big secret be nice.

[IslandThyme]

Such a sad commentary on the world today when we have to tell each other to be nice!

[GUT2407]

1 minute ago, SinbadThePorter said:

 

It's a very informal culture. About the only thing you need to do is say please and thankyou when things are done for you and not put on any airs. Don't be abrupt with strangers and if there is a problem, talk it out, don't yell it out.

There’s the good oil.

 

Many Americans are surprised by how often Aussies say, please thank you and excuse me.

 

one friend who was working out here got really confused in a shop, he would hand over his money the server would say thanks mate, and he thought he wasn’t going to get his change, because where he was from the thanks would only be given when the transaction was all over.

[GUT2407]

Just now, IslandThyme said:

Such a sad commentary on the world today when we have to tell each other to be nice!

I wasn’t saying be nice because I thought you wouldn’t be, but really that is all you need to do, if you are nice and polite and smile, you don’t need anymore to get bye in Aus and NZ.

[GUT2407]

As for tipping, any tipping I do is for my benefit, I’ll often round up rather than end up with a pocket full of coins.

 

Remember minimum adult wage down here in Aus is about $20 an hour so staff and relying on tips to live, they really are tips. In the bush leave a tip and you might find someone chasing you down the street, to give you your change. I’ve seen it.

[IslandThyme]

Oh no, I didn't take it personally at all, because I already know you to be a friendly and helpful person, at least on CC 😉.

 

Thanks for the heads-up, because yes, if I handed money to a server, expecting change, and that person said thank you before what I viewed as the end of the transaction, I would be confused too. 

[joybook]

I agree. Just be yourself and be polite. People from other countries are just that, people from other countries. Don't try and be an Australian or New Zealander.

[GUT2407]

3 minutes ago, joybook said:

I agree. Just be yourself and be polite. People from other countries are just that, people from other countries. Don't try and be an Australian or New Zealander.

Especially don’t try to be a Kiwi, strewth even most of them would rather be Aussies.

[GUT2407]

5 minutes ago, IslandThyme said:

Oh no, I didn't take it personally at all, because I already know you to be a friendly and helpful person, at least on CC 😉.

 

Thanks for the heads-up, because yes, if I handed money to a server, expecting change, and that person said thank you before what I viewed as the end of the transaction, I would be confused too. 

Just little things like that can make a difference

 

also be prepared for our habit of shortening words, for example if you are told something like “Woollies will be a great place to get your bread”, they will be talking about Woolworths, here a major grocery store chain.

 

or “Maccas” McDonalds fast food joint. 

 

Had a CD on one cruise ask us, “I don’t drink tea, will I get a coffee at this Maccas place because I have been asked to meet someone at Maccas for tea”, she was actually be8ng asked to meet at McDonalds for a meal. Another example of if you are confused, ASK.

[NSWP]

1 hour ago, GUT2407 said:

Especially don’t try to be a Kiwi, strewth even most of them would rather be Aussies.

Many have settled in Bondi and Cronulla, going back to the 60's and 70's.   Nice weather, plenty of work and good money and good pies.

[NSWP]

1 hour ago, IslandThyme said:

Oh no, I didn't take it personally at all, because I already know you to be a friendly and helpful person, at least on CC 😉.

 

Thanks for the heads-up, because yes, if I handed money to a server, expecting change, and that person said thank you before what I viewed as the end of the transaction, I would be confused too. 

Our Mr Gut, friendly and helpful ??? 😂  I would agree, sometimes, no overall he is not a bad lad, good pie appraiser, you have to try some pies when you get here.

[GUT2407]

8 minutes ago, NSWP said:

Our Mr Gut, friendly and helpful ??? 😂  I would agree, sometimes, no overall he is not a bad lad, good pie appraiser, you have to try some pies when you get here.

Just hasn’t met me Uncle Les, lots of people get me confused with a nice guy.

[NSWP]

1 minute ago, GUT2407 said:

Just hasn’t met me Uncle Les, lots of people get me confused with a nice guy.

You need to take off your disguise then when you venture out into the streets or go cruising.😅

[Aus Traveller]

An example of cultural differences. On a cruise last year a couple from the UK remarked to me that they had never seen so many ill people. I was surprised and answered that I didn't see a lot of sick passengers. The women then said that when they asked an Aussie how they were, they got a litany of illnesses as a reply. I had to laugh. I have heard it said that you never ask an Aussie how they are because they take the question literally, rather than as a pleasantry. The British woman said she would stop asking the question, but when they got home they would be thought rude if they didn't ask everyone then encountered how they were.

 

We just say "Hello" or "Good morning".

 

BTW, please ignore the earlier suggestions of asking NZ'ers if they have sheep, how are the All Blacks (the national team) are going in the netball. Also don't ask the Auzzies if they have a pet kangaroo and if they know Paul Hogan. These suggestions were all tongue in cheek.

 

You will probably notice some rivalry between Aussies and NZ'ers, similar to what you would see between siblings. Aussies joke about the NZ'ers sheep and some of these jokes suggest unnatural uses for a sheep. All of this is said in good fun and taken as such, but I think if someone from elsewhere made such a joke, it might not be taken well.😊

[GUT2407]

2 minutes ago, Aus Traveller said:

An example of cultural differences. On a cruise last year a couple from the UK remarked to me that they had never seen so many ill people. I was surprised and answered that I didn't see a lot of sick passengers. The women then said that when they asked an Aussie how they were, they got a litany of illnesses as a reply. I had to laugh. I have heard it said that you never ask an Aussie how they are because they take the question literally, rather than as a pleasantry. The British woman said she would stop asking the question, but when they got home they would be thought rude if they didn't ask everyone then encountered how they were.

 

We just say "Hello" or "Good morning".

 

BTW, please ignore the earlier suggestions of asking NZ'ers if they have sheep, how are the All Blacks (the national team) are going in the netball. Also don't ask the Auzzies if they have a pet kangaroo and if they know Paul Hogan. These suggestions were all tongue in cheek.

 

You will probably notice some rivalry between Aussies and NZ'ers, similar to what you would see between siblings. Aussies joke about the NZ'ers sheep and some of these jokes suggest unnatural uses for a sheep. All of this is said in good fun and taken as such, but I think if someone from elsewhere made such a joke, it might not be taken well.😊

Unnatural use,???? the Kiwis seem to think it is totally natural.

 

and yes a lot like siblings, I have seen my kids  hold each other on the floor by the hair, but let someone else look sideways at their sibling and they are right there ready to fight for their brother/sister. Aussies and Kiwis can be the same, sling off at each other all day, but if someone else does, straight to our ANZAC mates defence.