Dress Code

[SargassoPirate]

1 hour ago, exlondoner said:

 

You have probably made a wise choice. We all find different things offensive. I am slightly crushed by the implied derision of 'cheap $100 polyester suit' being beneath consideration. While Cunard passengers do not always come across well in dress code debates on these boards, on the ships themselves at any rate I have never felt despised for being (relatively) poor.

 

The clothes police do seem to be a bit more militant and opinionated on Cunard and P&O.  I try to fit in as easily as possible when considering what to pack for a trip that includes a month or two on land before or after a cruise.  To that end, my standard black ensemble has been allowed into the MDR on formal/gala nights on several lines - including Cunard.  And I always check with the maitre d first.  While it may be an affront to the "tea in first" crowd,  a smile and polite behavior will carry the evening.

 

As the character Jack Dawson said in the movie Titanic  "Just the other night I was sleeping under a bridge and now here I am on the grandest ship in the world having champagne with you fine people. I figure life's a gift and I don't intend on wasting it."

 

[Stella1250]

Really? I was on the QV last July, in Queens Grill. Here we were with our gown and tux, and there was a man coming to dinner in black jeans and a bomber jacket. EVERY NIGHT IN QUEENS GRILL.  Yes he was elderly, but nobody said anything. He was taken care of, shown to his table and served. The tone of the responses here is atrocious. Yes your husband will be just fine in a dark jacket and pants. What you will have to protect yourself from are the sanctimonious people who have decided that it is their Cunard and will abide nothing else but what they want. We saw many people out and about who were not dressed formally on formal nights. Dark suit, cocktail dress, long flowy pants etc. If you want to take a Cunard cruise, by all means do so. Pay no attention to those who will tell you that you must walk the plank if you do not dress the way they say.

[exlondoner]

Without wishing to prolong a rather sterile and repetitive discussion, the clothes you mention: dark suits, cocktail dresses, and long flows pants are all within the garments deemed acceptable for formal/gala nights. And were when I first sailed with Cunard.

[Stella1250]

Exactly my point. Why tell the OP that a dark jacket and pants was not "formal" enough?

[mcloaked]

The whole issue of dress code especially on formal/gala nights has been a pretty contentious one for some time - people enjoy being part of a group - young folk going to a disco would expect that most would wear a general theme for clothing, generally very casual but also having a style that is hoped would look cool - if you turned up in a dinner suit to a disco for a group of 20 somethings you would look very much out of place!  Equally if you turn up at a Gala Evening on a ship where most people are wearing smart evening dresses, and dinner suits with bow-ties, then you would look pretty out of place in torn jeans and a t-shirt.  Of course there is always someone who wants to make a point that they can wear styles that are very different to most others in a group - but generally those people going to a formal evening are dressing up because it looks smart and creates a different atmosphere compared to when people dress casual and people enjoy doing it.  There are cruises where there are no formal nights or dress codes at all - and there is plenty of choice concerning the various cruise lines to suit most tastes - big ships/small ships - quiet gentle ships/loud big entertainment ships and so on.  Many people choose to go on the cruises where formal nights have the majority dressing up because they like dressing up for the evening - If I was someone who didn't like that then I would go on a cruise where it wasn't required - so it shouldn't be a problematic issue at all.  

 

If it is sweltering hot weather then being dressed in formal wear is hot - but more often than not the Queens Room and indeed the dining rooms are air conditioned so that usually isn't an issue.

[2Oldpeopleinlove]

I’ll just say I am happy we were not knowingly in the company of people who are willing to be insulting over a small difference in dress. While we took very formal clothing ourselves and much preferred the general dressing up to seeing shorts and tshirts in the fancier restaurants as we did on NCL, neither of us is above having a delightful evening with good people without tuxedos!

[Reuben's 3rd]

Wow, this topic does seem to bring out the vitriol!  My husband prefers to wear a tux on Gala nights, but there have been trips for us without the tux.  He wore a navy blue blazer and navy trousers or a black blazer and dark grey trousers,  a white shirt, white pocket square and navy or black and grey bowtie.  I wore those "flowy" pants (palazzo's) and a silk top.  Never heard a single "tsk-tsk", either as we walked by or from our table mates.  We have had several lovely gala night dinners, enjoying the company of one or two male tablemates wearing lighter colour jackets or suits.  No one questioned their right to be seated.  I have seen the maitre "d" chatting pleasantly with a gentleman in a burnt orange suit, as he walked with him to his table, on a Gala night.  

Relax.  For whatever reason, many people seem to be more forceful in their opinions on this site than I have ever seen in 10 Cunard trips.  Look as if you have made an effort and all will be well.

[Jack E Dawson]

At the end of the day, the dress code is a Cunard issue. Either they will hold to their own published standards or they wont. It's their decision. If Cunard chooses to turn a blind eye, there will be plenty of passengers who, either mistakenly or intentionally, lower the standards. However, my experience has been that Cunard has, for the most part, handled the situation in a reasonable manner. Things change. The published dress code today is much relaxed from 60 years ago when my parents sailed on the Queen Mary. I have old pictures of them attending the Bon Voyage party (back when crowds still lined the dock and passengers threw streamers) with my Dad wearing a dark suite and my Mom wearing a very nice dress. Personally, I love the formal atmosphere but I know that I can't stop change. But wouldn't it be great if there was one event (optional of course) that required a top hat and served free champagne🎩🍾

 

Jack

[Lakesregion]

Times certainly have changed. The poster who mentioned the lad on the Titanic (movie) as an example that he came from steerage and was dining with the "swells" Please note that he wore a first class very formal outfit and the next night when he was not in proper attire he was denied access to the room. As to T shirts under a sports jacket, that in my opinion is so far from country club casual as to be auto scrubbing  attire with lipstick. But many have pushed for that level and they seem to be winning. Eventually someone with real money will buy a decent ship and make it formal and will fill it. Until then grin and bear up. If one finds the company at table not to their liking they can request to the maitre de to be moved to better (for them) surroundings.

[bazzaw]

On 2/19/2020 at 7:57 AM, Host Hattie said:

As bluemarble explained above, those photographs are wrongly labelled. It's clear when you compare the description of what is suitable for formal night with the photographs.

Anyway -you won't find any of those young male models (or anything like them) dressed either casually or formally on a Cunard ship!! 🙂  and the bright red cummerbund with the black tie !! No sir!!!!! - just not on!! 🙂

 

[bazzaw]

On 2/21/2020 at 2:23 AM, Stella1250 said:

Really? I was on the QV last July, in Queens Grill. Here we were with our gown and tux, and there was a man coming to dinner in black jeans and a bomber jacket. EVERY NIGHT IN QUEENS GRILL.  Yes he was elderly, but nobody said anything. He was taken care of, shown to his table and served. The tone of the responses here is atrocious. Yes your husband will be just fine in a dark jacket and pants. What you will have to protect yourself from are the sanctimonious people who have decided that it is their Cunard and will abide nothing else but what they want. We saw many people out and about who were not dressed formally on formal nights. Dark suit, cocktail dress, long flowy pants etc. If you want to take a Cunard cruise, by all means do so. Pay no attention to those who will tell you that you must walk the plank if you do not dress the way they say.

He may have been the richest man there!!

[bazzaw]

Our last cruise with Cunard was a "3 Queens cruise" out of Southampton - quite popular with Aussies. One of the passengers for the three cruises was an old Aussie farmer - a huge man with size 96 (or something) feet. He had recently retired and had had a lifetime of fighting floods, droughts and fires in the Aussie outback. He was a TRUE "Gentle"man  - but he had never been anywhere or done anything  other than to farm the land.   He had never even heard of Cunard!!! before he landed on Queen Mary 2!!!  His wife had done all the organising, had bought all the  necessary clothes including a Tuxedo --- BUT, on the flight over to the UK, his feet had swollen. On the first formal  night , he could not get any of his shoes onto his swollen feet - so he turned up at the entrance of the restaurant dressed in his tuxedo , asked for the Matre'D - and asked if he could dine in his rubber flipflops as they were the only thing he could get on his feet. !! 🙂  He made for a marvelous table companion for the  cruises to the Baltic, the Norwegian Fjords and across to New York . I often wonder about the tales he would have told to his mates in the local country pub on his return. Every time I saw him he was always gobsmacked about something or other!!! 🙂   "Judge not lest Ye be judged" !!!

[milleruszk]

It is hard to believe that this issue is still being discussed.   Passengers have been trying to bend the Cunard dress code to suit them since it was adopted.   If you don't like to dress for dinner find a different cruise line.   There are plenty to choose from.

[navybankerteacher]

2 hours ago, milleruszk said:

It is hard to believe that this issue is still being discussed.   Passengers have been trying to bend the Cunard dress code to suit them since it was adopted.   If you don't like to dress for dinner find a different cruise line.   There are plenty to choose from.

Precisely - I prefer a less formal environment, but do sail Cunard when itinerary, etc. meets needs/wishes.  (Great way to come home from yearly visits with family in England).  When I do, I play by their rules - it is tiresome how people keep trying to lower the bar.  It’s not hard for a man to understand (and comply with) the well publicized dress code - and when they say “tuxedo” or “dark suit” for the special evenings, that is what is called for - not just something dark.

[Smokeyham]

Begagirl,

 

I understand your concerns and am attracted to Oceania because of their "Country Club Casual" dress code.   

 

I think for many a cruise on Cunard is the trip of a lifetime and having the formal elegance is part of that experience, and that people can be protective of that experience.  

What I think you might find is that if choose not to dress formally, on formal evenings, is that you might not feel comfortable in the theatre or other venues on board where people are more formally dressed.  

[ExArkie]

At the risk of prolonging a discussion that probably needs to end, my opinion:

 

The Cunard dress code is a frequent topic on this board. Various previous threads have starred antagonistic posts deploring the nerve of a cruise line to require one to wear a tie and how they have no right to destroy my vacation with such requirements. Obviously, that does not go over well. Conversely, rather innocent questions about formal (excuse me, "gala" which just confuses the issue further) dress definition sometimes precipitate antagonistic responses from persons fed up with having to defend Cunard for their dress code, sometimes out of proportion to the tone of the original question.

 

You will find that the militant defensive posture on dress code rarely carries over to the general atmosphere on the ship.  Despite some evidence to the contrary recently, Internet discussion boards do not accurately represent real life.

 

If you follow the Cunard descriptions of acceptable dress for Gala Evenings, everything will be fine. There is even leeway given over "dark suit," encompassing shades lighter than black, although neon colors would definitely be pushing it too much. The only serious objections are to those that are defiant in asserting they will not follow the dress code and expect Cunard to allow them to have unlimited access to all venues.

 

 

[exlondoner]

It is interesting that the phrasing of the question often enables one to guess the answer. 'Will I be all right with...(eg a long black skirt and some dressy tops?)', almost always leads to the answer, 'Don't worry, you'll be absolutely fine.' 'Can I get away with... eg black jeans and a polo shirt?' more often leads to the answer 'Not really'.

[lissie]

On 7/28/2020 at 3:56 AM, ExArkie said:

 

 

If you follow the Cunard descriptions of acceptable dress for Gala Evenings, everything will be fine. There is even leeway given over "dark suit," encompassing shades lighter than black, although neon colors would definitely be pushing it too much. 

 

 

Actually on Gala evenings on QE in Feb I saw several men wearing white jackets - that apparently was fine. Also a young(er) guy with neon pink which was also apparently fine. In all cases they were wearing bowties and formal shirts and black trousers. 

 

I always understood that if you are actually going traditional - white tie with white dinner jacket or black tails is more formal than a mere tuxedo in black . 

[PORT ROYAL]

6 hours ago, lissie said:

 

 

I always understood that if you are actually going traditional - white tie with white dinner jacket or black tails is more formal than a mere tuxedo in black . 

 

It is the event/occasion Host's invitation will determine the formality of the dress code, not the invitee.  Out of respect to the Host, one complies with the invitation's dress code.  It's just good manners.

 

A white tie event is different to a black tie dinner, and a white jacket event is different to both a white or black tie event/occasion.

Which is more formal?  

Neither is more formal for a specific event/occasion,  just the correct attire, respecting the Host's event/occasion invitation.

To wear the complete white tie attire to a white jacket event, or visa versa et al, is a definate no-no

"Going Traditional" is simply following the dress code as determined by the invitation.

Example:  The ship (The Host) issues daily publications, with regard to the various dining dress codes.  To genteel cruisers, these publications will be deemed as an "invitation" from the Host.  Therefore, the stated dress code will be followed in respect of the Host and any other invitees. Again, good manners.

 

[BigMac1953]

Spot on Port Royal.

 

We actually saw one strange person last year on a "Gala" night cocktail party on QE who was wearing a bright multi-coloured checked 3 piece suit, complete with matching trilby hat!

 

My wife thought it was Coco the Clown.

 

Maybe she was right.

[Smokeyham]

2 hours ago, PORT ROYAL said:

 

It is the event/occasion Host's invitation will determine the formality of the dress code, not the invitee.  Out of respect to the Host, one complies with the invitation's dress code.  It's just good manners.

 

.......... Again, good manners.

 

I like this perspective; that it is just good manners to follow the published dress code.  

[resistk]

Post COVID I think the smart thing is to keep luggage to a minimum especially old tuxedos and evening gowns that have no practical use except to conform to a "dress code."  I am not saying passengers should dress slovenly or wear shorts and open shirts to dinner, I am suggesting that bringing extra luggage on board a ship for gala balls may become a thing of the past for hygenic reasons.

[BigMac1953]

16 minutes ago, resistk said:

Post COVID I think the smart thing is to keep luggage to a minimum especially old tuxedos and evening gowns that have no practical use except to conform to a "dress code."  I am not saying passengers should dress slovenly or wear shorts and open shirts to dinner, I am suggesting that bringing extra luggage on board a ship for gala balls may become a thing of the past for hygenic reasons.

 

I think you're on a loser there

 

[exlondoner]

19 minutes ago, resistk said:

Post COVID I think the smart thing is to keep luggage to a minimum especially old tuxedos and evening gowns that have no practical use except to conform to a "dress code."  I am not saying passengers should dress slovenly or wear shorts and open shirts to dinner, I am suggesting that bringing extra luggage on board a ship for gala balls may become a thing of the past for hygenic reasons.

 

Dont quite understand this. If I and my spouse have a medium sized suitcase each with sufficient garments for, say a twelve night cruise, what difference does it make whether they contain evening dresses or extra non-formal clothes? Why do evening dresses have less practical use than other dresses? They may have other purposes too, like enhancing one's appearance or adding to the ambience, but, unless extremely décolleté, admirably fulfil the practical purpose of covering one up.

[PORT ROYAL]

10 minutes ago, resistk said:

Post COVID I think the smart thing is to keep luggage to a minimum especially old tuxedos and evening gowns that have no practical use except to conform to a "dress code."  I am not saying passengers should dress slovenly or wear shorts and open shirts to dinner, I am suggesting that bringing extra luggage on board a ship for gala balls may become a thing of the past for hygenic reasons.

 

Strange, because one has never considered bringing extra luggage to show respect for the dress code and other Cruisers, as being an unhygienic act. 

 

With regard to "old Tux" etc, one travels with two off Tux, but one has a new Tux every year which replaces a two year one.  Shirts, ties, shoes the same.  Cufflinks are retained.

 

Consider the use of the word "old", as it could be prefixed by one day; one year, one minute.  Your premise is therefore correct, everything is "old".