With cell phones in airplane mode, how do couples communicate during a cruise

[Hlitner]

14 minutes ago, navybankerteacher said:

Seconded - and that can be a safe protocol to follow if the grandchildren are largely civilized enough to not call at dinner time unless necessary.   Our grandchildren do not have access to their phones when having dinner at their, or our, homes.

#1 Rule,,,Grandchildren can do no wrong 🙂

[navybankerteacher]

8 minutes ago, Hlitner said:

#1 Rule,,,Grandchildren can do no wrong 🙂

I generally agree -- and find it something of a pity that you have to deal with children first.

[RoyMartin]

15 minutes ago, navybankerteacher said:

I generally agree -- and find it something of a pity that you have to deal with children first.

As a new, first time grandparent, I find it oddly similar and different than parenting. The love I feel for my granddaughter is identical to the love I feel for each of my children. A kind of unconditional love that exists for no one else. Even love for a spouse is different because in a healthy relationship one has expectations and so our love is conditional. As an example, if a spouse cheats on us we're likely to leave the marriage. Nothing would ever cause me to reject a child or grandchild. If, heaven forbid, one grew up to become a dangerous or violent person, I might agree that he/she needs to be imprisoned but I'd never get over it. I'd never stop mourning the loss.

What's different is that, as a grandparent, I have no responsibility and no control. As a parent all of the responsibility falls on me and with that goes a myriad of decisions I make regarding my child's well being. As a grandparent, I'm completely at the grace of the child's parents, my daughter and son-in-law. They decide how she gets raised. They decide whether they want my input and I know not to offer it unless asked. They decide how often I get to see my granddaughter. All of which makes it a very different sort of experience.

When she's older, my approach will be to ask my daughter and son in law what standards they want me to hold and impose when she comes stay with us. If they give me carte blanche to do it my way, that's fine. My wife and I are much more tolerant and easy-going with kids than they are. That's not a criticism at all. I don't think there's a "right" and "wrong" way here. Just different styles. My son in law is a former army captain and brings that sort of military mindset to family life. My daughter mostly subscribes to it. So they do meals at specific times and a lot of structure, whereas we tend to be more "free range" with out son.

What's odd is that I'm parenting and grand parenting at the same time. Our son is 8. My daughter from my first marriage is 36.

[sparks1093]

15 hours ago, RoyMartin said:

Thanks for all the great answers. This is our first cruise (in case that's not obvious) so we're not sure what to expect. The ship seems so huge. I know neither of us will be interested in the shopping mall or the casino but we there's a lot of ground to wander. We have an eight-year-old son who's unlikely to want to go to the children's program. He's a brilliant but not typical child. The kind who enjoys time with adults more than other children unless he finds another kid like himself. We home school so he's not used to being away from us. So I'm imagining one of us (or both of us) spending a lot of time trying to do things that interest him.

It probably won't seem hard to keep track of each other once we're on board. We weren't planning on getting wifi. We were hoping for a week free from computers and internet. Does the app work without the wifi package? We'll be on a Royal Caribbean ship, "Ovation of the Seas". They call it a Quantum class ship.

It's been a hot minute since we've been on Royal but I believe that their app works without wifi. I know that Carnival charges a small fee to use the chat feature in their app (which also works without wifi) and I believe Royal does as well, but I'm sure the details are outlined on Royal's website (although you might need to do some digging to find it).

[ldubs]

22 hours ago, Hlitner said:

I would find that preferential to a large tour bus :).  We have been on numerous cruises when the Wifi, Internet, or both go out of service for hours/days.  It is fascinating to watch the panic in the faces of some cruisers.    I must admit, that DW and I fight the tendency to become addicted to the phones.  One rule, in our home, is to not use our phones during dinner with one exception...if the Grandchildren are calling.

 

Hank

 

Yes, I get it.  I just use the technology and don't spend too much time worrying about it.  

BTW, I will take a palanquin any day over the covered wagon.  😀

[Toofarfromthesea]

On 2/1/2023 at 9:23 AM, ldubs said:

Well, you need a cell phone of some kind, but yeah, I like WhatsApp.  One of our sons lives and works in another country.  We use it all the time to talk to him.   Good suggestion! 

 

The point was that there is no magic to an iphone, any smartphone with wifi allows connumication.

[ldubs]

7 minutes ago, Toofarfromthesea said:

 

The point was that there is no magic to an iphone, any smartphone with wifi allows connumication.

 

Yup.  I have the connumification app on my phone!  😀

[ldubs]

On 2/1/2023 at 9:51 AM, sverigecruiser said:

 

We cruise because we want to spend time together so for us that is no problem.

 

Me too and using the cell helps us do that.   There seems to be this conviction in several posts that using a cell phone prevents that.   Truth is convenient communication via cell phone promotes "togetherness".   Instead of hiking to the cabin for a post-it, finding a house phone & hoping someone in the cabin picks up, or waiting to meet at the pre-planned rendezvous point,  it is a simple matter to give your partner a call or text to meet up somewhere.  

 

Is a cell phone needed to get in touch with your traveling partner?  No.  It is a heck of a lot more convenient?  Yes.   

[shipgeeks]

1 hour ago, ldubs said:

 

 

Is a cell phone needed to get in touch with your traveling partner?  No.  It is a heck of a lot more convenient?  Yes.   

But is carrying them around all day, and keeping them charged, more convenient?

[lenquixote66]

I have friends who do not have cell phones or computers and they do not have problems

[RoyMartin]

1 hour ago, shipgeeks said:

But is carrying them around all day, and keeping them charged, more convenient?

For me it is. My phone is slim and fits in my pocket. Charges overnight and never goes below 50% no matter how much use I give it during the day. Depending on your phone and usage patterns, YMMV.

[RoyMartin]

15 minutes ago, lenquixote66 said:

I have friends who do not have cell phones or computers and they do not have problems

Yes, a cell phone is one of those things that, in my experience, goes from a ridiculous and unnecessary luxury to an absolute necessity as fast as a rocket accelerates into space . . . once one begins using it. Computers aren't much different. When I was a child, my mom went to community college to learn to program computers. In those days they had these big ponderous mainframes. Whole buildings were designed around them. She trained to become like one of the high priests to the digital god no one uninitiated understood. Desktop and later laptop computers changed all that. Heck, now our phones are computers. Even our keys are computers. Our cars, refrigerators and toasters incorporate computers.

[lenquixote66]

2 minutes ago, RoyMartin said:

Yes, a cell phone is one of those things that, in my experience, goes from a ridiculous and unnecessary luxury to an absolute necessity as fast as a rocket accelerates into space . . . once one begins using it. Computers aren't much different. When I was a child, my mom went to community college to learn to program computers. In those days they had these big ponderous mainframes. Whole buildings were designed around them. She trained to become like one of the high priests to the digital god no one uninitiated understood. Desktop and later laptop computers changed all that. Heck, now our phones are computers. Even our keys are computers. Our cars, refrigerators and toasters incorporate computers.

I had a very happy childhood in the 1940’s without the modern conveniences that kids have currently.

[Hlitner]

1 hour ago, lenquixote66 said:

I have friends who do not have cell phones or computers and they do not have problems

On a upcoming HAL cruise (is Asia) we need to get a K-ETA (Korean travel authorization) that can only be done on a smartphone (most have had little success trying to do it on a normal computer) and Japan requests that folks complete (on their phone) their Visit Japan Registration which generates a UPC (on the phone) which smooths the way to enter Japan.  

 

Why do I mention this?  Because while folks can usually (not always) find a work around without a phone (or other device) it is becoming very difficult to impossible for some travel.  The K-ETA is a great example because it is mandatory and can only be done on a device (preferable phone since you need to have that approval to show authorities).

 

We could agree that phones are not mandatory on ships (at least we have not seen this) but I can tell you that the lack of a working smartphone puts one at a big disadvantage on some lines since that is the method generally used to make/change dining reservations or show excursion tickets!  

 

We live in Mexico (during the winter) and are hosting a party.  In some cases, the ONLY way we can contact some invites is via text messages (sometimes their e-mail address also works).  If those folks did not have working cell phones they would simply not get invited since there is no other reasonable way of contact.  We also regularly communicate (hear and see) our Grandchildren via Facebook or Zoom (both done on phones).  Otherwise, we would have no reasonable way to keep in touch with family unless you could find us super long-range carrier pigeons :).  And finally there are the airlines that too often have schedule changes and/or cancellations.  How do they communicate this to passengers?  Via text messages or e-mails.  Getting this information can be the difference of driving hours to an airport only to find your flight is cancelled or delayed (sometimes several days).

 

While are of similar generations and I do understand the reluctance of some folks to "get connected" it continues to become increasingly difficult to travel without a working smartphone.  We have had this online conversation in the past, and just since the last time we have run into new travel requirements that make a smartphone necessary.  But when it comes to cruises, my own preference has always been to turn off my phone, lock it in the safe, and go enjoy.  But even that is now becoming increasingly difficult.

 

Hank

 

 

[RoyMartin]

I agree with both perspectives. In some ways it was easier to be in the world when life was simpler. In some ways, these devices help us and make life easier. They are, over time, becoming less optional.

I remember going to my grandfather's factory in the 1970s. I was a kid, there with my dad. The woman at the front desk was telling my dad that they had just gotten some sort of computer (rudimentary no doubt back then) and were struggling to implement the system. Everything had always been done on paper until then.

Imagine trying to run a business, any business, on paper now. Would be impossible. I'm an attorney. My computer is almost a part of my body. I have no secretary to type documents, no dictaphone, none of the old infrastructure. If I submitted documents with stray marks to the court, they'd get kicked back to me. Our standards for what's acceptable are way higher since so much more is possible these days. Try telling someone in the 1940s that you've got a printing press on your desk. They'd think you had gone mad.

[lenquixote66]

25 minutes ago, RoyMartin said:

I agree with both perspectives. In some ways it was easier to be in the world when life was simpler. In some ways, these devices help us and make life easier. They are, over time, becoming less optional.

I remember going to my grandfather's factory in the 1970s. I was a kid, there with my dad. The woman at the front desk was telling my dad that they had just gotten some sort of computer (rudimentary no doubt back then) and were struggling to implement the system. Everything had always been done on paper until then.

Imagine trying to run a business, any business, on paper now. Would be impossible. I'm an attorney. My computer is almost a part of my body. I have no secretary to type documents, no dictaphone, none of the old infrastructure. If I submitted documents with stray marks to the court, they'd get kicked back to me. Our standards for what's acceptable are way higher since so much more is possible these days. Try telling someone in the 1940s that you've got a printing press on your desk. They'd think you had gone mad.

I graduated college and completed my years of employment prior to the Internet.I cannot equate the typewriter to a computer ,however,for me the typewriter is what the computer is for you.

[RoyMartin]

36 minutes ago, lenquixote66 said:

I graduated college and completed my years of employment prior to the Internet.I cannot equate the typewriter to a computer ,however,for me the typewriter is what the computer is for you.

Makes sense. I was a very serious junior high school student before the personal computer was a thing. I remember studying typing in school (something my children just picked up on the fly) and then wrestling with a manual typewriter until I managed to get a bottom line electric typewriter as a gift that my mother considered two years worth of Christmas presents and my next birthday. In other words, I went into a sort of family debt at the age of 14 because I wanted to succeed academically.

It was a time when teachers would accept hand written reports, projects and lab results but I wanted to make sure my presentation was top notch because nothing less than an "A" was acceptable. For some crazy reason, I got it into my head that I wanted to go to an "elite" university but was from a working class family. Looking back, that was nuts. Wound up getting in and getting a degree from that sort of school but I didn't get any better education than I could have had at a state school for a fraction of the price. Got to walk on marble floors and look out through stained glass windows, so there was that. Had to pay off something like $12k in debt back at a time when that was very real money. A time when one could buy maybe three cars for that amount or make a down payment on a nice home. Oh well. We live and learn.

[ldubs]

5 hours ago, shipgeeks said:

But is carrying them around all day, and keeping them charged, more convenient?

 

Plug it in at night.  And yes, you do have to carry it with you or it won't do much good.  To me it is convenient.   Others might prefer not to carry one.  That is up to you.  The point I was trying to make is, contrary to those with a more parochial view, communicating on board via cell phone is very convenient and enhances our time together.   Can you get by just fine without one?  Sure.   

[lenquixote66]

1 hour ago, RoyMartin said:

Makes sense. I was a very serious junior high school student before the personal computer was a thing. I remember studying typing in school (something my children just picked up on the fly) and then wrestling with a manual typewriter until I managed to get a bottom line electric typewriter as a gift that my mother considered two years worth of Christmas presents and my next birthday. In other words, I went into a sort of family debt at the age of 14 because I wanted to succeed academically.

It was a time when teachers would accept hand written reports, projects and lab results but I wanted to make sure my presentation was top notch because nothing less than an "A" was acceptable. For some crazy reason, I got it into my head that I wanted to go to an "elite" university but was from a working class family. Looking back, that was nuts. Wound up getting in and getting a degree from that sort of school but I didn't get any better education than I could have had at a state school for a fraction of the price. Got to walk on marble floors and look out through stained glass windows, so there was that. Had to pay off something like $12k in debt back at a time when that was very real money. A time when one could buy maybe three cars for that amount or make a down payment on a nice home. Oh well. We live and learn.

I graduated college with a dual major of Psychology and Sociology.I minored in English with a concentration in Literature.When I was in my senior year of college I went to the placement office to look for post graduate employment.There was a listing for a health insurance company that was hiring grads who majored in Psychology to work in their Industrial Psychology Department.I applied for the job and spent 38 years working in Health Insurance.

[Hlitner]

7 hours ago, lenquixote66 said:

I had a very happy childhood in the 1940’s without the modern conveniences that kids have currently.

As a fellow senior, I would remind you that the 40s were about 80 years ago!  Times have changed

 

Hank

[ldubs]

4 hours ago, lenquixote66 said:

I graduated college and completed my years of employment prior to the Internet.I cannot equate the typewriter to a computer ,however,for me the typewriter is what the computer is for you.

 

And technology came up with electric ones, which I'm sure just about everyone wanted, even though they got by just fine with the old manual ones.   The IBM Selectrics were awesome.  I could actually backspace and correct typos!   

[RoyMartin]

2 hours ago, ldubs said:

 

And technology came up with electric ones, which I'm sure just about everyone wanted, even though they got by just fine with the old manual ones.   The IBM Selectrics were awesome.  I could actually backspace and correct typos!   

Oh, how I longed for a Selectric. Never happened. Next stop, dot matrix printer and a desktop computer with 8 megabytes (8 million bytes -- approximately since computers don't work in base 10) of memory. Ridiculous now. My laptop has 16 gigabytes (16 billion) and that's by no means that much anymore.

For a time in the early "90s, I was in the IT field. It was the twilight of the mainframe era but they still us stuff like how to flip a single bit because memory was so precious. They called it "learning to program a toaster", which in those days was a joke. Now you toaster probably has a computer chip or two. Suffice it to say no one is flipping bits anymore. Software engineers work through layers of software, each level compiled upon the next. They can create stuff that accomplishes so much more. As an example, it was in the late 90s that we began to see home computers that could run crude video. In the 2000s, we began to see streaming and streaming services. Stuff no one dreamed possible back in the day except as an exercise in "someday", a form of science fiction. 

[Mary229]

I hardly think whether one uses a phone or not to communicate is a sign of character or strength of marriage.  Nor is it a badge of travel experience 

😉

Edited February 3, 2023 by Mary229

[Mum2Mercury]

On 2/1/2023 at 11:21 AM, Toofarfromthesea said:

If you have the internet package you don't even need an iphone or wifi calling, just use WhatsApp.

You've used WhatsApp on a ship?  Without having any paid ship internet?  If so, this is good news. 

On 2/1/2023 at 5:30 PM, Hlitner said:

#1 Rule,,,Grandchildren can do no wrong 🙂

Absolutely true!  My one and only is barely a year old, but he's perfect.  

On 2/1/2023 at 6:03 PM, RoyMartin said:

... Nothing would ever cause me to reject a child or grandchild. If, heaven forbid, one grew up to become a dangerous or violent person, I might agree that he/she needs to be imprisoned but I'd never get over it. I'd never stop mourning the loss ... 

Expanding on your thought ... having taught high school for three decades, I've seen a couple families who've "put children out of their house" , and at first I thought, "That's something I'd never do -- never -- no matter what." 

 

But then I really saw what was going on in one family, and it made me think again:  Four kids, the second child (still a minor) was big-time into drugs.  He was bringing drugs into the house, where anyone could have found /used them, and he was hanging around with a dangerous crowd.  After many attempts at rehabilitation, the parents put him into a half-way house of sorts because they feared he would "corrupt" the two younger children with his negative influence.  It wasn't an easy choice for them, but I see why they did it.  

13 hours ago, RoyMartin said:

Makes sense. I was a very serious junior high school student before the personal computer was a thing ...

... For some crazy reason, I got it into my head that I wanted to go to an "elite" university but was from a working class family. Looking back, that was nuts. Wound up getting in and getting a degree from that sort of school but I didn't get any better education than I could have had at a state school for a fraction of the price ...

I can relate to that!  I took typing as a high school sophomore -- I even took shorthand as a class (only because I had to have something 5th period), and, wow, is that useless information.  In retrospect, I should've taken study hall or office assistant as a class.  Anyway, I went away to college with a super-heavy manual typewriter that had belonged to my grandparents, and I was beyond thrilled when I got a cute little electric typewriter (folded up into a suitcase) as a sophomore.  

 

I am a huge proponent of the state university system.  My husband, my children and I are all graduates of our state universities, and those degrees are serving /have served us well.  None of us had any debt.  With very few exceptions, I see no point in paying $$$ extra for a private school's name on your diploma.  

[lenquixote66]

11 hours ago, Hlitner said:

As a fellow senior, I would remind you that the 40s were about 80 years ago!  Times have changed

 

Hank

Yes,they have ,however,would you agree with me that the 50’s to the mid 70’s was a great time .In 1963 I was dating a woman living in the Bronx.

On nearly every Saturday night I boarded the subway near her residence at about 1AM and took IRT subway to the last stop in Brooklyn .There was no fear of being mugged.