Formal Night Dilemma with No Solution

[wvufan]

Even though we are plain ole WV folks, we manage to comply with the dress code even in the Caribbean. Of course, our ancestors were from Europe;).

 

 

Happy Sails to You

 

OOOEEE :D:D Bob and Phyl

[Scottygirl1]

Even though we are plain ole WV folks, we manage to comply with the dress code even in the Caribbean. Of course, our ancestors were from Europe;).

 

 

Happy Sails to You

 

OOOEEE :D:D Bob and Phyl

 

Oh Bob and Phyl..... I love you!!

 

I'm glad someone is finding this all funny - it has become far too serious :D

[jannandjohn]

[lucky white heather]

Sorry I should have said "in my experience"... from my time spent in Italy. You just didn't see "scruffy" over there. The ladies were all in tailored clothing and you just didn't see people out and about in track pants etc. You know what I mean. I know for a fact that we all had to grab the dressiest things out of our suitcase while there so that we didn't look too underdressed.

 

Mind you, we were not in a tourist location while there so we did tend to look obviously like tourists!

 

:)

 

 

I vowed not to get into this thread...but you are spot on the point Scottygirl... Europeans in general wouldn't do "scruffy" or "track suits for every occasion"...we've moved on from that long since and I do believe Europeans are far more "into" what they want to wear for specific purposes than North Americans are, for whatever reason.

 

But it is a fact of life that they apply more consideration to what they wear on an everyday basis even...perhaps particularly more so in Italy than in other areas of the continent ....where " style" is taken very seriously indeed... it's a money spinner and the young public want to have the most up-to-date of everything...nothing else will suffice. This has a knock-on effect on the older population too.

[babyher]

Actually, I am very judgmental about important things such as people who do horrific things that destroy the lives of other people. I am also very judgmental about a physician's qualifications because I want only the best specialists to take care of me or people that I love. I also won't work with an attorney or investment broker without doing extensive research on him/her first.

 

When I was young and single I was also very judgmental about who I would marry which is probably why I have been happily married for 35 years.

 

On the other hand, I am not very judgmental about things that I consider to be superficial such as the way a person is dressed.

 

 

 

Very well said :)

[sunshine 229]

Can I slightly change the subject? This thread has gone on way too long but here is a thought... Do you think that people dress more formally while on a Mediterranean cruise as opposed to and Alaska cruise or Caribbean etc.

 

Europeans are extremely sharp, clean, neat dressers so I would assume that people might go to more trouble for a cruise to this destination?

 

I wonder if the shore experience may have something to do with the formality of the dinner dressing of many passengers too. I mean in Alaska, where many people will be doing shore excursions that call for more rugged outdoor wear, the focus may be more on packing the things needed for those activities.

 

I know that as I am now planning a September cruise to Alaska, I am more worried about packing fleece and layers and waterproof shoes than I am about formal wear. I still intend to bring something that is suitable for the formal evenings but whereas on a Caribbean cruise, I might take two completely different formal dresses with co-ordinating jewelry and shoes etc. for this cruise I'll probably bring a single long black skirt and two different tops or even one simple evening dress with a change of jewelry for the two formal nights and devote more luggage space to long undewear.

 

ETA: The increased strictness of airlines about number and weight of luggage adds to this desire to pack less too.

 

Just a thought.

[Breezey]

I wonder if the shore experience may have something to do with the formality of the dinner dressing of many passengers too. I mean in Alaska, where many people will be doing shore excursions that call for more rugged outdoor wear, the focus may be more on packing the things needed for those activities.

 

I know that as I am now planning a September cruise to Alaska, I am more worried about packing fleece and layers and waterproof shoes than I am about formal wear. I still intend to bring something that is suitable for the formal evenings but whereas on a Caribbean cruise, I might take two completely different formal dresses with co-ordinating jewelry and shoes etc. for this cruise I'll probably bring a single long black skirt and two different tops or even one simple evening dress with a change of jewelry for the two formal nights and devote more luggage space to long undewear.

 

ETA: The increased strictness of airlines about number and weight of luggage adds to this desire to pack less too.

 

Just a thought.

 

I agree with you 100%. We went to Alaska in May (fantastic!!) and our focus was what to wear during the day while in Alaska not what to wear formal nights. We took more luggage than typical only to fit in all the stuff. I brought one cocktail black dress and a black pair of pants with 2 different tops. That was plenty. My friend did the same. And thats my plan for cruises from now on. My husband took one suit (while he owns a tuxedo, no way will be lug that on a cruise again) and wore it twice with 2 different shirts and ties.

[lucky white heather]

Very well said :)

 

I think we all have to consider how we best spend our time and money evaluating what we want for best practice in life but when you are on a cruise can it be assumed surely that you are there to participate as best practice also demands, trying to meet with the given requests/ requirements aboard ship eg. being back in time so everyone else is not inconvenienced by keeping the ship waiting...no one argues about that requirement.....or not getting too drunk so you cannot control your behaviour... I don't see pages of stuff arguing about that should not be an expected standard , so why not just come to dinner in dress code appropriate clothing ? It's simple to do, inexpensive and not time consuming on the ship if you plan how to do it ahead of boarding and also enjoy the time spent before your holiday starts...

 

I could spend years of my life assessing my doctor's competence etc etc and spend my day worrying about things that I need to investigate really thoroughly but when I book a cruise I anticipate I am going to be there to enjoy freedom from everyday concerns and want to fit in / match with the cruising experience whatever it is.

 

There are requirements for everything in order to be aboard a ship even those ships not belonging to Celebrity...like presenting your passport, filling in forms, pay for your cruise...whatever... you either have to conform or be refused boarding. Let's not make this a scenario for people to moan about having to conform even just a little more than the necessary basics ...why would you cruise if you don't want to do as you know you will be requested/ required to ? Just to be difficult? Why bother..?

[Ma Bell]

An Alaskan cruise is not like going to the North Pole. It really doesn't require a lot of heavy clothes. It's summertime folks. We've been there more than 10 times and I've never had a problem packing our formal clothes. Then there's always the $25 dreaded second suitcase.:eek:

[woodofpine]

It's just too easy to pack the appropriate stuff... None of that packing argument flies with me...

 

People that don't dress in conformity simply have different sensibilities than the rest of us. In that narrow situational setting, they're 'wired' differently. So a certain per cent of the pax are 'wired' that way. It means next to nothing as a criteria to judge those folks or society at large. For instance, I don't think I'd pick a heart surgeon on the basis of how they dress on cruise ship formal nights...

[Bridge Maven]

Has anyone ever taken a cruise where the cruise line's website, as well as cruise docs, indicated that there would be only two formal nights, but once they boarded the ship they discovered that there would be three formal nights instead and one less informal night?

 

That happened to us last year on a 12 night Royal Caribbean cruise. It was a non issue for my husband because he could easily wear his tux again for the third formal night but I had the choice of either wearing one of my formal outfits twice, wearing one of the outfits that I intended to wear on an informal night (which no longer exist), or not eating in the main dining room that night.

[gkm]

I had the choice of either wearing one of my formal outfits twice, wearing one of the outfits that I intended to wear on an informal night (which no longer exist), or not eating in the main dining room that night.

 

What's wrong with wearing the same outfit twice? With limited space in luggage and staying under the weight limit on airlines, I think a lot of cruisers are doing this now. Personally, I don't remember a cruiser's outfit from one dinner to another.:rolleyes:

 

Garry

[lucky white heather]

Has anyone ever taken a cruise where the cruise line's website, as well as cruise docs, indicated that there would be only two formal nights, but once they boarded the ship they discovered that there would be three formal nights instead and one less informal night?

 

That happened to us last year on a 12 night Royal Caribbean cruise. It was a non issue for my husband because he could easily wear his tux again for the third formal night but I had the choice of either wearing one of my formal outfits twice, wearing one of the outfits that I intended to wear on an informal night (which no longer exist), or not eating in the main dining room that night.

 

We've had it the opposite way...they took a formal night off and replaced it with another casual ( 5 in a row I recall!) ....we just coped as best we could....it was annoying no one got to see the oufit I had worked so hard to put together for the third formal night by mixing and matching from the stuff I packed..but the worst thing was wasted space in the suitcase, in Europe you are stuck with one checked bag of 23 kgs (approx. 44 pounds) on a better airline , or 20kgs on one of the budget airlines.

Now if I had been in the good ol' USA when this happened I would have had a luggage allowance of 2 bags p.p. at 50 pounds each bag plus carry on....so plenty of choices to make up for those unforeseen events.

[snorkeldork]

in Europe you are stuck with one checked bag of 23 kgs (approx. 44 pounds) on a better airline , or 20kgs on one of the budget airlines.

Now if I had been in the good ol' USA when this happened I would have had a luggage allowance of 2 bags p.p. at 50 pounds each bag plus carry on....so plenty of choices to make up for those unforeseen events.

 

Even in the good ol' USA, may airlines now restrict each passenger to one bag of not more than 50 pounds, plus one carry-on (and a purse for women). Must be the price of fuel.

[WELSH WIZARDS]

There seems to be some underlying opinion on this thread that if the husband does not wish to " dress up " then the wife is some how prevented from doing so. Why ?

Come on Ladies...this is the 21st century....never mind what your husband wears.....do your own thing, wear what you want, and act like the individual and equal you are. !!

[Bridge Maven]

This thread reminds me of a funny story. When my friend was looking at the photo proofs from her daughter's black tie wedding at an upscale hotel, she noticed that there was one couple dancing in many different photos. She didn't know who they were and assumed they were invited by the groom's family. When she asked the groom's family they told her that they had no idea who that couple was and assumed they were invited by the bride's family.

 

It appears that this couple discovered that a wedding and was taking place in the hotel, and because they were so appropriately dressed, no one realized that they didn't belong there...LOL :)

[usha]

Great story, Bridge Maven!:)

[lucky white heather]

Even in the good ol' USA, may airlines now restrict each passenger to one bag of not more than 50 pounds, plus one carry-on (and a purse for women). Must be the price of fuel.

 

We still have 2 bags and a carry on as long as we are going to /from the good ol' USA.

[babyher]

This thread reminds me of a funny story. When my friend was looking at the photo proofs from her daughter's black tie wedding at an upscale hotel, she noticed that there was one couple dancing in many different photos. She didn't know who they were and assumed they were invited by the groom's family. When she asked the groom's family they told her that they had no idea who that couple was and assumed they were invited by the bride's family.

 

It appears that this couple discovered that a wedding and was taking place in the hotel, and because they were so appropriately dressed, no one realized that they didn't belong there...LOL :)

 

 

 

That is so funny....My sister and i were just thinking about something very similar to this a couple weeks ao at my uncles funeral.

 

Usually at the cemetary right after the service, the funeral director invites everyone present on behalf of the family either back to the house or (as is popular in our area)to a local restaurant for food .

 

Now we would never do this but the thought just crossed our minds.

 

There are always a couple of funerals almost everyday. after almost everyone of them the funeral director makes the same announcement. A person could show up at the cemetary nicely dressed and mix in with the crowd (especially if it is a large crowd ) and just head off to the home or restaurant and eat. As we joked "You can eat pretty good on the "funeral circuit" :) *LOL*

 

Who is gonna know one extra person? Like your friend, everyone will just figure its some friend or distant relative. *LOL*

[dkjretired]

That is so funny....My sister and i were just thinking about something very similar to this a couple weeks ao at my uncles funeral.

 

Usually at the cemetary right after the service, the funeral director invites everyone present on behalf of the family either back to the house or (as is popular in our area)to a local restaurant for food .

 

Now we would never do this but the thought just crossed our minds.

 

There are always a couple of funerals almost everyday. after almost everyone of them the funeral director makes the same announcement. A person could show up at the cemetary nicely dressed and mix in with the crowd (especially if it is a large crowd ) and just head off to the home or restaurant and eat. As we joked "You can eat pretty good on the "funeral circuit" :) *LOL*

 

Who is gonna know one extra person? Like your friend, everyone will just figure its some friend or distant relative. *LOL*

 

Reminds me of the movie "Wedding Crashers" which did include a funeral scene at the end.

[snorkeldork]

We still have 2 bags and a carry on as long as we are going to /from the good ol' USA.

 

You are living up to your screen name. You really are *lucky*

[C 2 C]

I sure am enjoying this thread!! Will I look out of place and could anyone tell me is there one night that is "more formal" than the others? Perhaps the final formal night?

 

You are more likely to fit in your formal wear early in the cruise then later on. Sea air has a tendency to shrink whatever you wear while on a cruise. ;)

[scottbee]

What's wrong with wearing the same outfit twice? With limited space in luggage and staying under the weight limit on airlines, I think a lot of cruisers are doing this now. Personally, I don't remember a cruiser's outfit from one dinner to another.:rolleyes:

 

Mix and Match... For my last cruise (15 nights) I brought a tux, 2 tux shirts, and 3 different vests (black, purple and red). Allowed me to go formal 3 nights (sent one shirt off for laundering), all slightly different. Now, also parlayed the black vest into an accessory for a couple of the semi formal stuff.

 

Bottom Line;

Mix it up a bit, gives you flexibility

Laundering on board is way cheaper than a 2nd suitcase, and pressing is even cheaper (I think $2.00 to press a shirt and 3.50 to launder it).

 

 

As for the OP's 'dilemma', there is casual dining (still with waiter service) upstairs in the buffet. The food is still excellent, and there's no pressure to wear a suit/tux/etc. While you may not feel out of place if you're not dressed for dinner, there are a significant number of people on board who will feel that you're spoiling their party, and I tend to follow into that category. No one is asking you to dress up that night, they're just asking you not to go to the MDR if you don't.

[Bridge Maven]

Who said YOU don't comply with the dress code? Have you ever heard of the use of the editorial "you", meaning that it is addressed to those to whom it applies?

 

Obviously the other comment was in response to what you said, but I didn't direct that comment to YOU.

 

So pointing out the facts makes one judgmental? Personally I don't care if someone wants to wear their pajamas to dinner, but if someone asks a question here it should be answered truthfully. If the passengers were the ones deciding what they think everyone else should wear they might be accused of being judgmental. Celebrity is the one who decided what the dress code would be. It's just a case of those who comply and those who don't. If THEY don't want to, so be it, but what is the point of trying to get approval for doing other than what is clearly spelled out by the cruiseline?

 

The "I'm not judgmental" line always appears when there is no defense for a position. The people who point out what the dress code "is" are not being judgmental, and they don't need any condescending remarks.

 

It appears that I misunderstood the intent of your post and responded based on that misunderstanding.

 

Therefore, I would like to apologize for my response to your post.

[Bridge Maven]

Has anyone ever taken a cruise where the cruise line's website, as well as cruise docs, indicated that there would be only two formal nights, but once they boarded the ship they discovered that there would be three formal nights instead and one less informal night?

 

That happened to us last year on a 12 night Royal Caribbean cruise. It was a non issue for my husband because he could easily wear his tux again for the third formal night but I had the choice of either wearing one of my formal outfits twice, wearing one of the outfits that I intended to wear on an informal night (which no longer exist), or not eating in the main dining room that night.

 

BTW - this is what I did when confronted with that situation. One of the outfits I had packed for informal night was a long silk patterned skirt, that has a stylized hem line, with a dressy black top. It wasn't the type of outfit that I would normally wear on formal night but it fit right in.