Travel to Live Posted June 6, 2016 #1 Share Posted June 6, 2016 My mom recently passed and she wanted to be buried at sea. She loved cruising and we have created many wonderful memories traveling together. We have a cruise booked on the Oasis of the Seas (Royal Caribbean) for mid-July 2016 and I am looking for the specifics of the ceremony. I have already contacted emergency services and received my letter to give to the purser's desk after boarding, and I have the certificates of death and cremation. We are looking at getting a biodegradable urn in the shape of a boat, and I was wondering if anyone else had any experience with something similar. I understand that we might be a few decks up from the water, but do they have a way of lowering our urn delicately? Should I buy biodegradable rope to lower it myself? I don't want to just drop it from two or more decks up; because lets face it, it will not land with the sails up. The emergency care call line couldn't tell me any specifics about what will occur once on the ship. They said to ask for details once on board. I would really love to hear from anyone having experience with an at sea burial, but especially anyone who has experience with an Oasis class ship because of the size differences in class. Thanks for any help you can give! Laura Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clarea Posted June 6, 2016 #2 Share Posted June 6, 2016 When we did the burial on Liberty, it was from the aft mooring deck, which I believe was deck 2. So not very far up, but too far to place the urn in the water. We had to drop the urn. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mjasp Posted June 6, 2016 #3 Share Posted June 6, 2016 So you can't "scatter" the ashes? What's the difference of doing it that way if you are on the aft deck? The ashes won't touch anyone and will wind up in the water. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MattInFLL Posted June 6, 2016 #4 Share Posted June 6, 2016 (edited) I did it with my brother's ashes, but on Princess. The Captain did the ceremony from the lowest passenger open deck, which was deck 5 I think. If you look at this pic of the back of Allure you see there is really no place you are going to be able to release the urn and control how it lands on the water. They are not going to open water tight doors on a moving ship. I hope that doesn't distress you. It's an emotional thing. I will say that the way Princess handled it pre cruise and the way the Captain handled it on the cruise was great. Edited June 6, 2016 by MattInFLL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ken at the beach Posted June 6, 2016 #5 Share Posted June 6, 2016 So you can't "scatter" the ashes? What's the difference of doing it that way if you are on the aft deck? The ashes won't touch anyone and will wind up in the water. No, you can't scatter the ashes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mjasp Posted June 6, 2016 #6 Share Posted June 6, 2016 No, you can't scatter the ashes. Thank You Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MattInFLL Posted June 6, 2016 #7 Share Posted June 6, 2016 No, you can't scatter the ashes. Exactly. No scattering. Only in the biodegradable urn. And you can only drop it in the water. They are not going to let you lower it. The ship does not slow down for this. It will be under the surface almost immediately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rare ReneeFLL Posted June 6, 2016 #8 Share Posted June 6, 2016 My mom recently passed and she wanted to be buried at sea. She loved cruising and we have created many wonderful memories traveling together. We have a cruise booked on the Oasis of the Seas (Royal Caribbean) for mid-July 2016 and I am looking for the specifics of the ceremony. I have already contacted emergency services and received my letter to give to the purser's desk after boarding, and I have the certificates of death and cremation. We are looking at getting a biodegradable urn in the shape of a boat, and I was wondering if anyone else had any experience with something similar. I understand that we might be a few decks up from the water, but do they have a way of lowering our urn delicately? Should I buy biodegradable rope to lower it myself? I don't want to just drop it from two or more decks up; because lets face it, it will not land with the sails up. The emergency care call line couldn't tell me any specifics about what will occur once on the ship. They said to ask for details once on board. I would really love to hear from anyone having experience with an at sea burial, but especially anyone who has experience with an Oasis class ship because of the size differences in class. Thanks for any help you can give! Laura Sorry for your loss. Hope all goes well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Langley Cruisers Posted June 6, 2016 #9 Share Posted June 6, 2016 So you can't "scatter" the ashes? What's the difference of doing it that way if you are on the aft deck? The ashes won't touch anyone and will wind up in the water. Assuming you are asking sincerely, the implications of something going very wrong are unsettling and disrespectful. The wind is strong on deck while underway - can you imagine someone getting ashes in their eye or in their drink? That's why a biodegradable urn is required. OP, so sorry for your loss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Truluv Posted June 6, 2016 #10 Share Posted June 6, 2016 (edited) Also sorry about your loss. About 3 years ago we buried DH's ashes at sea on Allure. I think it was deck 4 or 5 -- anyway, very high, and clearly no way to gently lower the ashes into the water. There was no ceremony by RCL, just privacy for our family for 5-10 minutes. The ship's officer and security guard who met us at the Pursar's desk and then accompanied us to the location at the back of the ship for the burial at sea were very respectful and clearly tried to give us a little privacy. We did purchase some flowers onboard, and our kids put them overboard at the same time that I put DH's ashes overboard. Due to the weight and bulkiness (and TSA issues), the funeral home moved DH's ashes from the biodegradable salt urn that we had initially purchased to a TSA approved container, which was essentially a pretty cardboard box. It did float on top of the waves for a moment or two but was caught up in the ship's wake and out of sight very quickly. My guess is that the original salt urn would have immediately gone below the surface of the water because of its weight. Another option, but obviously really, really expensive, would be to rent a charter at one of the ports. It's possible to lower the ashes into the water from a smaller boat. Edited June 6, 2016 by Truluv Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tbmrt Posted June 6, 2016 #11 Share Posted June 6, 2016 What charges are involved from cruise ship to do burial at sea? (I read that family would be accompanied to deck and do their own service there with a biodegradable urn)? Can estate of decedent pay for the family members' cruise and any related ship charges for burial at sea as allowable funeral expenses? We are considering requesting a burial at sea on a cruise ship vs. renting a private boat to do service when we redo our wills. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clarea Posted June 6, 2016 #12 Share Posted June 6, 2016 What charges are involved from cruise ship to do burial at sea? (I read that family would be accompanied to deck and do their own service there with a biodegradable urn)? Can estate of decedent pay for the family members' cruise and any related ship charges for burial at sea as allowable funeral expenses? We are considering requesting a burial at sea on a cruise ship vs. renting a private boat to do service when we redo our wills. Royal does not charge for burial at sea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spookwife Posted June 6, 2016 #13 Share Posted June 6, 2016 So you can't "scatter" the ashes? What's the difference of doing it that way if you are on the aft deck? The ashes won't touch anyone and will wind up in the water. wind. wind scatters ashes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Capt_BJ Posted June 6, 2016 #14 Share Posted June 6, 2016 https://www.ashesatseaflorida.com/Scattering_Services.html just one example ... most beach communities have something similar ... essentially you are simply doing a part day boat charter law required the vessel be 3 miles off shore for cremated remains Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pmorton3360 Posted June 6, 2016 #15 Share Posted June 6, 2016 (edited) Also the ashes are very rough. A few years ago, we released some out of a plane and it scrapped the paint off. Edited June 6, 2016 by Pmorton3360 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jagsfan Posted June 7, 2016 #16 Share Posted June 7, 2016 We had a little unauthorized ceremony for a friend's sister's ashes while in port. We went all the way aft on the Lido deck, said a few goodbyes, and my friend dropped the ashes over the side. Even though it was a calm day and the ship was not moving, we were immediately covered with the ashes. They also went into the scuppers, where they would stay till washed away. We all tried desperately not to go "eewww"and dance around trying to get the ashes off us. I'm talking hair, face, arms and clothes. That's why you don't do your own "scatter the ashes"!! Sent from my iPhone using Forums mobile app Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Travel to Live Posted June 28, 2016 Author #17 Share Posted June 28, 2016 Thanks for all the great information. I spoke with someone from Royal Caribbean and she said that if we had biodegradable rope (still in the package and with the receipt) that we might be able to lower it down and let it go that way. They also said that they normally take you down to an employee area for the release and that it was normally on deck 2-3 depending on the ship, and that their could be a ceremony if we wanted one. And for those that asked there is no fee for the burial at sea, but from what I found it is common to tip those that help you. We go on our cruise in just a few weeks, so I will let everyone know in detail what happens. Thanks again, Laura Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnjen Posted June 28, 2016 #18 Share Posted June 28, 2016 Sorry for your loss, OP. From seeing ashes being scattered from experience on US Navy ships, it's been very bad results. The ashes naturally will dash upward and would scatter everywhere. I think the Navy now does it the same way: tossing the biodegradable urn overboard, aft. What a nice sendoff idea though. I've never seen it done on a cruise ship yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rare John&LaLa Posted June 28, 2016 #19 Share Posted June 28, 2016 We 'scattered' someone at CoCo Cay. We didn't know him. A friend who knows we cruise just asked us to drop him off in the Caribbean. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
erniesband Posted June 28, 2016 #20 Share Posted June 28, 2016 For the OP, We participated in a burial at sea a few years ago on Jewel OTS. The whole thing has to meet the approval of the environmental officer on board. Be very careful of the " biodegradable " urn, we had a paper mache one that was certified as biodegradeable but the environmental officer on board would not approve it. This happened at the last moment before we were to send it down to the sea, at the time it was very upsetting and not handled well by the aforementioned officer. We had to open the container and just scatter the ashes, not what was planed. I would contact the environmental officer on the specific ship and make sure the urn you get will be acceptable to them. They have the final say in what goes overboard and what doesn't. Don't want to see what happened to us to happen to you. We did release the urn into the sea on a non ship sponsored excursion later in the cruise so all ended well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LovesCruising Posted June 28, 2016 #21 Share Posted June 28, 2016 What charges are involved from cruise ship to do burial at sea? (I read that family would be accompanied to deck and do their own service there with a biodegradable urn)? As someone else posted - there is no charge Can estate of decedent pay for the family members' cruise and any related ship charges for burial at sea as allowable funeral expenses? Depends on the estate - thats a personal matter where I would assume the deceased would have to spell out their wishes in their will for a burial at sea. - stating a cruise would be paid for by the estate for the family members for this purpose - probably best to contact an attorney on this one. We are considering requesting a burial at sea on a cruise ship vs. renting a private boat to do service when we redo our wills. Id have your attorney be very specific in your will about your wishes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeeW Posted June 30, 2016 #22 Share Posted June 30, 2016 BIL recently found out his mother's ashes can no longer be carried on an aircraft unless specifically packaged and delivered directly from the funeral parlor without contact with the family. I checked the TSA website and found that this varies by airline but you do need an urn that can be scanned by xrays even if allowed by the airline. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Truluv Posted June 30, 2016 #23 Share Posted June 30, 2016 I also spoke to the TSA when we did this 3-years ago, and their guidelines at the time were that (1) the ashes needed to be carried with you (not checked in luggage); (2) you had to disclose to the TSA agents that the container had human remains. TSA agents are not allowed to open those containers; (3) the TSA scanner had to be able to see a quarter under the container, or the package would not be allowed to pass. Our biodegradable salt urn was so heavy and solid, that we were concerned that it would not permit scanning. That's why we went on-line and purchased a TSA certified container for DH's ashes (the funeral home switched DH's ashes to the new container for us). The TSA certified, biodegradable container was essentially a pretty cardboard box that had DH's name and some other info printed on it. They also recommended checking with the airline on any specific restrictions. At the time, there was no rule about having funeral homes deliver ashes to the airport. I'm not sure how that would work. I did check with our airline before our flight. They had a site with some info on it, such as confirming that the ashes could not be put into checked luggage. I had also checked into having the ashes delivered to a hotel in FL for us, when we were trying to figure out how to get the heavy salt urn down to FL. I learned that you can't send ashes through USPS, although one of the other services would accept them for carrier delivery. And we looked into trying to get more time off to drive, which had been our first choice -- just not possible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cruise-Nut Posted July 4, 2016 #24 Share Posted July 4, 2016 My mom recently passed and she wanted to be buried at sea. She loved cruising and we have created many wonderful memories traveling together. We have a cruise booked on the Oasis of the Seas (Royal Caribbean) for mid-July 2016 and I am looking for the specifics of the ceremony. I have already contacted emergency services and received my letter to give to the purser's desk after boarding, and I have the certificates of death and cremation. We are looking at getting a biodegradable urn in the shape of a boat, and I was wondering if anyone else had any experience with something similar. I understand that we might be a few decks up from the water, but do they have a way of lowering our urn delicately? Should I buy biodegradable rope to lower it myself? I don't want to just drop it from two or more decks up; because lets face it, it will not land with the sails up. The emergency care call line couldn't tell me any specifics about what will occur once on the ship. They said to ask for details once on board. I would really love to hear from anyone having experience with an at sea burial, but especially anyone who has experience with an Oasis class ship because of the size differences in class. Thanks for any help you can give! Laura I told my kids and wife that I want a burial at sea. Then when they are at the beach they can send the grand kids in the water and say "Go play with Grandpa". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Please sign in to comment
You will be able to leave a comment after signing in
Sign In Now