Nervous about bringing our soon to be three year old

[why2klisa]

I'm driving myself crazy trying to decide if we are doing the right thing by bring our son on his first cruise in December. He is turning 3 in October and we are doing a four night on Indy. He hasn't fully mastered potty training yet so if he doesn't get that down he won't be able to use all the pool facilities. I'm not comfortable with the idea of dropping him off at the kids club until he gets a little older so I'm concerned that he will be bored and it won't be a fun trip for anyone. We are taking the trip to celebrate our 11th wedding anniversary and wanted to take him because I miss being away from him for even one night and hoped that he would enjoy the trip and we would have fun as a family. Now I'm starting to worried about everything; him climbing the railings, being bored, getting seasick. I need opinions, please!!!

 

Thanks so much!!

[BillOh]

If you have a good place to leave him for the week, I would. I understand, we left our 3 year old with my Mother in law while we went to Hawaii. I also bought my MIL two tickets to Chicago so she could visit her family and take our daughter. In the long run it was win win and yes we were happy to see her again after that week.

[casinostreer]

We took our (almost) three year old last year and she loved it. We didn't get to spend THAT much time by ourselves, but we had a fantastic time. We bribed her with "if you want to go on the big ship - you have to be potty trained." It really seemed to motivate her. You still have a while until the cruise - he will probably be fine. It's different for every child.

 

Also - do yourself a favor and go in and visit the Adventure Ocean facilities. Your child may have the time of their lives. Lots of fun activities, other kids their age, etc. Also - you can come and visit anytime you want. Just because they are in there doesn't mean that they are sequestered. :) But they will have to be potty trained. (Like I said - you have 3 months to worry about that.)

 

We're about to go on the Freedom for our third cruise with our almost 4 year old and she couldn't be more excited. You will definitely have a great time!

 

HOWEVER - nothing says happy anniversary like being child free for 4 days. You will miss them, but "absence makes the heart grow fonder." :D

Edited September 29, 2015 by casinostreer

[Clarea]

I agree with Bill, it sounds like it won't be much of a vacation for you if you take the child.

[LMaxwell]

We are taking a 10 month old on a cruise this winter. Sure, it won't be like vacations before he was around, but I'm not going to worry myself sick over it. I'm going to take the family and have a new style of fun. If you always wait for everything to be perfect you'll be waiting forever.

[kernow]

We took our first ever cruise when our son was three, it was back in the 90s on the Carnival Celebration so without all the bells and whistles of today but all 3 of us had a fantastic time and were converted to cruising for life. Our son loved the kids club but I also remember that they had a several family activity times when we could all go along (RCL had this too when he was a bit older, don't know if they still do). He loved all the everyday things on the ship too and the staff made such a fuss of him.

 

You sound like the sort of parent who actually enjoys being with their child (we did too), so bring him along, you'll have great family memories and as the mother of a now grown up and moved away 21 year old I'd tell you to treasure every moment, they don't stay little for long:)

 

Julie

[seethesea429]

We have been cruising with our son since he was 8 months old and we have always had a great time. We have always used the kids club, though. If you do wind up taking your son, I would encourage you to go to the open house they have on the first afternoon. You can go in with him and check it out and see how you all feel about it. He does have to be fully potty trained to go in, though.

 

If you don't think there's any way you would use the kids club, you might want to rethink bringing him along. Independence is a big ship, but there's honestly not a lot to do for kids on it, especially if he's not able to use the pools. Besides the pools, there's a mini golf course and an ice skating rink (which is only open a few hours on a couple of the days), so you can kill some time at those places but it might get old quickly.

 

One thing you might want to look into of you're really set on taking him: I noticed on one of our previous cruises while I was picking up and dropping off my son in the kids club, there was a mom who would return a bucket of toys and check out a new one. I'm not sure if this is a program they offer or if they arranged something special for her, but I think it's worth a phone call. A new bucket of toys everyday might really help entertain your son :)

[MaddyandMax]

We are leaving in 3 weeks on a cruise with our 3 year old and I couldn't be more excited for him! My older daughter LOVED Adventure Ocean. She went for the first time just after her 4th birthday. She wanted nothing to do with us the entire cruise. At meal times she just begged to go back. :) She's 8 now and still talks about it CONSTANTLY.

 

We even potty trainined my son way earlier than normal so he could go to Adventure Ocean. He just turned 3 in August but has been trained since January. We used the cruise as an incentive and told him he needed to go on the potty so he could go on the big ship.

 

Yes it probably won't be as relaxing as doing a vacation without kids but I figure we are making memories with them and I have lots of time to vacation without them when they are older. I was just telling my husband yesterday I can't wait to see his face when he sees the ship for the first time.

 

Also, I would definitely recommend you go see them at Adventure Ocean. The people who work there really love children and have more schooling than I do and I'm a law clerk.

 

Sorry for the long and rambling post. I'm just excited!

[MaddyandMax]

Motion sickness - though I'm usually the one affected I bought some stuff on Amazon that came highly recommended. It's called Motion Eaze. It;s an oil you put it behind their ears. It is safe for all ages.

[conandrob240]

Personally, if you won't or can't use the kids club (can't if kid isn't potty trained) and the kid isn't old enough or potty trained to use the pools and the other activities, I don't think cruising is a great fit. I always say 3 and up for a cruise- must be old enough to use most of the facilities or the kid's going to be bored and get upset he can't go in the pool or on the slides or into the kids club and so on. And you are going to be miserable not being able to do anything either (and listening to the whining and crying)

[crusinthrough]

My son is older now but cruised with us when he was younger. He did not like the kids program and would not stay. We did family things together and all of us had a good time.

 

I must be from an older generation b/c I don't remember my parents being concerned if I would have fun on a vacation. They planned a vacation. I was happy to be included and never complained.

[Anita Latte]

Cruising, like life, doesn't have to be something filled with constant activity.

 

I don't know what your son does on a normal day...but from my experience raising my own son (now 14)...I say that family vacations, especially cruising, are a great to start training your child in how to do nothing for a while.

 

And I'm not joking.

 

Life is really busy...do not be concerned with how entertained your 3 year old will be. Just see what happens. The cruise isn't that long. There is great entertainment in just being around so many people! There are plenty of opportunities to see live music...to watch dancing...to just people watch. All over the ship! Let your son surprise you by showing you what he finds interesting to do.

 

I know my son was a late 2 year old when we took him to his first movie. I'm pretty sure it was Piglet's Big Movie...or some such child themed thing...but he could understand instruction and it was a new experience...and he didn't have any problems sitting still and being entertained in that way.

 

Seated properly (that is, in an appropriate spot to make a getaway if needed)...see how your likes the shows! We took DS to his first ballet at age 5. He loved it. He was fascinated by all the movement on the stage and the music (It was the Nutcracker). LIVE entertainment is full of movement and sound and can be amazing to watch.

 

There is some sort of weird thought prevailing today that seems to promote that kids need special entertainment, special kid food, etc. They have the capacity to appreciate MOST things...not at the same level...and maybe not for as long...but I would release yourself from expectations...prepare yourself to go with the flow...

 

Be calm. Be excited.

 

And enjoy your vacation with your son.

 

I agree with a PP...time goes by very quickly.

[brillohead]

My son was 3yo on his first cruise, which was on Celebrity over a decade ago. Even though he didn't go to the kid's club (which was no big loss -- their program was a single room in the bowels of the boat), he had a BLAST, and so did we.

 

We brought his potty chair to keep in our room so he didn't have to try to deal with the ship's toilet (be aware that they can be loud, just have him cover his ears if that kind of stuff bothers him).

 

He enjoyed eating in the MDR (I brought a couple toys for him to entertain himself), and the staff doted on him like crazy everywhere we went. One of the bartenders would always put a little paper umbrella in his Sprite, and he loved them so much that she gave him a whole bagful of umbrellas to bring home at the end of the cruise.

 

We did beach days on port days, so he got plenty of water time.

 

He loved his Pullman bed (the room steward put up an extra-tall railing for him).

 

We paid for an in-room sitter a couple evenings so we could go out on a "date night" together. He was so exhausted that he slept the whole time.

 

He didn't climb the railings (because he knew he'd get punished -- I raised a child, not a monkey, and he knew that certain behavior is not acceptable).

 

If you're worried about seasickness, bring some children's Benadryl (although ships are so big and stable these days, seasickness is much less likely than it used to be). That's what they'll give you if you take him to the medical clinic on board, and it's a lot cheaper to bring your own. (Ditto for children's ibuprofen or acetaminophen -- just bring your own.)

 

Our next cruise was on Princess, with a much better children's program. He was 4yo for that cruise, and he wanted to spend the entire cruise in the kid's club. He was bummed when it closed for a couple hours and he was stuck with his boring old parents. ;) Now he's a teenager and he spends the whole week hanging out with newfound friends he makes the first day. :cool:

[conandrob240]

Spending $1000s to do the things the kid could do at home isn't a vacation to me. And, in my experience, even the most well-behaved 3 yr old is going to pitch a fit (or at the very least be really unhappy) to see a pool he can't go into, to see a cool looking kids club he can't play in, to see a ride or activity and a bunch of people doing it that he can't do and so on.

[kalliekae]

Cruising, like life, doesn't have to be something filled with constant activity.

 

There is some sort of weird thought prevailing today that seems to promote that kids need special entertainment, special kid food, etc. They have the capacity to appreciate MOST things...not at the same level...and maybe not for as long...but I would release yourself from expectations...prepare yourself to go with the flow....

 

I'm from the older generation and totally agree! My kids weren't raised in the "must be entertained constantly" era. Going on a family vacation was a privilege and a family affair where we all enjoyed various activities. The vacation taught the kids to appreciate being together, but also taught them that alone time....maybe reading a book....was just fine. Going to public restaurants and sitting still at a table and conversing with adults was expected even at age 3. Watching the shows also taught them how to act. If they sit still in pre-school, then they can certainly sit still at a show. If your child gets antsy, then you make an exit. I think family vacations are a great teaching moment and if you are relaxed and make it fun then everyone will have a good time.

[tropiclvrs]

Our first family cruise was when my daughter was 2 and my son 4. We knew my DD would not be old enough to use the pools, and we were forutnate to have one of the coveted aft balconies on the Mariner so we brought along an little inflatable pool to fill out some and have her play out there. We used it a couple of times and she had a blast. If you have a regular balcony you can also do this. Just use the water from the shower with our ice bucket and then dub it back in the shower drain the same way.

 

Since she was also too young to go to kids club, they had a special play area up by the Crown Viking area which if I think was called "Cloud 9" or something like that. THey had all the Fisher Price toys and had the Little People theme for this age group. Parents would stay with their little ones there...just gave them a chance to play with toys and with other kids without dropping them off. They held special play sessions but I think you could go in there any time.

 

I love the idea from a previous poster about checking out a bucket of toys. Does Indy have the Dreamworks characters? That would be great if they do.

 

I also agree that you shouldn't worry so much about the need to constantly entertain your little one. Sometimes just sitting and relaxing and people watching will be entertainment enough.

 

Most likely you'll be able to get him fully potty trained by December so I think you'll have more options. Use the cruise as a big incentive for him to get it down.

[sjb317]

We took our first grandson on a cruise at 2 1/2 years, and then again at 5 years, took our second grandson on that cruise when he was 16 months. It's definitely not the same as an adults only cruise, but we still had a great time! Both boys loved being on the ship and did well, and we could always find things for them to do. Just walking around the ship was entertaining for the baby!:D We did not use the Adventure Ocean club for the 5 year as my son (his dad) said Ben was in daycare through the week at home and he did not want him in daycare on vacation.

 

By the way, Freedom class ships have a small pool area that is only for children in diapers. The baby enjoyed splashing around in it.

 

Sherri:)

[Anita Latte]

Spending $1000s to do the things the kid could do at home isn't a vacation to me. And, in my experience, even the most well-behaved 3 yr old is going to pitch a fit (or at the very least be really unhappy) to see a pool he can't go into, to see a cool looking kids club he can't play in, to see a ride or activity and a bunch of people doing it that he can't do and so on.

 

I get where you are coming from...sort of.

 

At home, there are chores and work...and parents that have additional responsibilities, some as simple as preparing food and cleaning the dishes...traveling away from the home environment gives a family TIME, the most precious commodity in the world. Limited and irreplaceable.

 

The cruise isn't so much about what you DO...it is also about what you don't HAVE to do. What you are able to do is what makes it worthwhile to take the break.

 

There are choices to do what you would normally do (work out and exercise), do what you WISH you could do (sit brain dead and people watch, read a book, SLEEP!), AND do something that you wouldn't have the option to do in your "normal" life.

 

Some kids are very cautious and not that enthused be "left alone" and separated from their parents in ANY environment, no matter how appealing we think a child themed environment may be. My son has never been interested in spending more time with strangers than with his family and has ALWAYS preferred to be with the adults/family rather than separated into some place with a bunch of strangers. At any age. Including now.

 

The only time he has spent time in the "kids" activities was when we happened to be on the same cruise as a friend of his from his middle school. That was fun for him...but he hasn't wanted to try to recreate that fun with "new friends" again.

 

The kid's clubs are off the beaten path and if the child IS one that would want to jump in (many don't, many are unsure and intimidated by a foreign environment), there is no need for the child to ever know that such a place exists on the ship.

 

The pool is a mixed bag. And that could be problematic, I agree...but at the same time...life is filled with delayed gratification...and the situation could be a learning opportunity depending on the child. And if the parents aren't trying to get in the pools themselves and are spending time with their kid...so that the kid is doing what the parents do...generally, this will eventually settle itself into a fine activity. Distraction and redirection are fine skills for parents to develop in dealing with their kids.

 

Depending on the home environment...generally...kids take their cue from their parents or are in training to do so...so if the parents are having fun doing whatever they are doing with their child (even if it is something they could do at home), then generally the child is happy.

 

I'm not understanding the underestimating of the value of time for a child to just BE with their parents on a family vacation? Frankly, it can be hard to carve out that time in the course of normal life.

 

Pick appropriate family activities...let everyone have "their time" where they get to do something more geared for them...let them experience what it's like for another family member to have "their time"...and have a good time overall. A 3-year old is just an adult in training...

 

Edited to add:

 

I wish I could give credit to this piece of information that I read once in some parenting book. Basically...the idea was that if a child lives in a family that is too child focused, where everything the child experiences is all about the child, THAT is a boring life for the child. Show the child that there is a whole WORLD of opportunity and things to experience and do that are far beyond the current reach of the child. Don't be a boring person yourself that has no life outside of the child. The book said something about how WHAT YOU DO can be interesting for a child to watch...so many things are NEW to a child. Simple, little things that we now take for granted are amazing for a child.

 

Just an example that many might relate to...riding the MONORAIL at Disney is a GREAT RIDE for a child. They are too unsophisticated to know that it is just transportation to the "real" rides in the park.

Edited September 29, 2015 by Anita Latte

[LuvWilliam]

We took DS when he was 12.5 months old... It wasn't an absolute nightmare but it wasn't a relaxing vacation. We are bringing him on Oasis next month for his third birthday. We will have two sets of grandparents to help us out. We also planned a seven night next year on Anthem but by ourselves. We also went on Liberty this past February for a five night by ourselves. I missed him too when I'm away but one night in and we had the best time ever. Sometimes you need to not be parents 24/7 and be a little selfish. lol

 

Definitely check out Adventure Ocean, but he will need to be potty trained. They don't allow any diapers and the children must be able to use the bathroom including pulling down and up pants, zippers, washing hands, etc... The staff cannot help them with any of that.

[LuCruise]

I would think it would depend on the type of vacation you'd like. If you want a relaxing adult time, then you can look into finding family who will look after him for the week. If you want precious family time. He may not remember but you'll have great memories and he'll enjoy in the moment, then bring him. You may not be able to do all that you would do otherwise, but I'm sure he'll still enjoy and you can all do stuff and explore together. It is a shorter cruise so a good way to try out a vacation with him. I'd go for the latter, but again, it depends on what you're looking for. Both are good options.

PS - You can't force a child to potty train.

Edited September 29, 2015 by LuCruise

[conandrob240]

"Some kids are very cautious and not that enthused be "left alone" and separated from their parents in ANY environment, no matter how appealing we think a child themed environment may be. My son has never been interested in spending more time with strangers than with his family and has ALWAYS preferred to be with the adults/family rather than separated into some place with a bunch of strangers. At any age. Including now."

 

I am sure this is, in part, to how it is positioned and the attitudes buried underneath this. Meeting "strangers" from different cultures and backgrounds can be the richest learning experience a child has. They will never get that from family time. Learning independence as you get older (teens) and branching out away from parents in a somewhat safe environment is part of becoming an adult. It's about how you position it and what you project about it onto your child. We have some of each on a cruise but I certainly wouldn't want a child clinging to me, afraid to meet new people and try new things on a cruise.

[cb at sea]

Your child may LIKE the kid's club...most do, so try it! It will give HIM something to do.

 

Now, what do you do with your child when you're not on vacation? Well, do that on the ship, too! You don't have to change your lifestyle just because you're on vacation!

 

If your child isn't potty-trained for the ship's pools, at your ports, he can use the beaches for splashing....it won't be a total loss, you know!

 

You're a family...and most families vacation as such....if you have parents willing to have some "bonding time" with their grandson, that's great! If you want to keep it a "family" thing, then go for it! There is no right or wrong way to cruise/vacation!

Edited September 29, 2015 by cb at sea

[Anita Latte]

"Some kids are very cautious and not that enthused be "left alone" and separated from their parents in ANY environment, no matter how appealing we think a child themed environment may be. My son has never been interested in spending more time with strangers than with his family and has ALWAYS preferred to be with the adults/family rather than separated into some place with a bunch of strangers. At any age. Including now."

 

I am sure this is, in part, to how it is positioned and the attitudes buried underneath this. Meeting "strangers" from different cultures and backgrounds can be the richest learning experience a child has. They will never get that from family time. Learning independence as you get older (teens) and branching out away from parents in a somewhat safe environment is part of becoming an adult. It's about how you position it and what you project about it onto your child. We have some of each on a cruise but I certainly wouldn't want a child clinging to me, afraid to meet new people and try new things on a cruise.

 

You quoted me...

 

Your surety is wrong. I agree that the attitudes, opinions, and presentation of parents greatly influences children's thoughts. But sometimes, no matter how hard you try to encourage someone to do something...they have opinions of their own...a viewpoint of their own...and it seems that you can't change their mind.

 

My post was just demonstrating how everyone is unique. SOME kids don't like the kid's club. There was a lot of talk about the pluses of a kids' club to the mom of a child that may not even qualify to go to the kids' club.

 

That didn't seem to be that encouraging to me to a mom that was expressing concern over the vacation. I was only trying to point out that going to the kids' club isn't the pinnacle experience for all kids. In other words, don't worry about whether or not your kid can go to the kid's club...

 

For my part...please don't mistake PREFERENCE for FEAR. I don't really want to argue or defend myself...I usually am annoyed by similar side conversations on a thread...so I'm trying to be very concise when I say that the kids' clubs can be very unappealing to some kids and it can have nothing to do with fear. Lack of interest in the kid's club does not equal a clingy child... The opposite is the same...the lack of interest in a parent in using the kid's club does not equal with a clingy parent.

 

All of my discussion was related to a family vacation on a cruise. I'm actually grateful that my son still enjoys being with us enough that he would rather hang out with Mom and Dad (and sometimes with Grandma and Grandpa) on the ship than go to the teen scene. I don't see him much at home, he's crazy busy with school/activities and usually wanting to be with his friends in his free time...and his Grandparent's live 2-3 time zones west.

 

And I disagree...you can meet people and do new things when you are with your family, especially on a cruise. You can actually learn great people skills with your family, if your family is social...the live action demonstration can be quite beneficial to a child, of any age.

 

The OP was expressing concern over the fact that a cruise ship may not have enough entertainment for her 3 year old if he can't use the pool. She specifically stated that she wants to have fun "as a family"...my post was just trying to offer her some encouragement in the idea that I'm pretty sure that it's possible to have some family fun on the cruise ship...even given her circumstances.

[CruisinSinceIwasBorn]

Went on the Liberty in March when my daughter was 8 months. Taking her on the Indy 4-day in November. We had a great time, and so did she. There is a pool available for kids in diapers, though its more designed for babies than toddlers.

 

On the first night we got a bag of toys checked out from the nursery, which was great because they were new to her and helped reduce how much we packed. We utilized the nursery each night from 7-11. Allowed us to have a more quiet, peaceful dinner and go to the show. She loved the nursery because she just wanted to sleep, which she happily did in a crib in the nursery. The staff was very professional and friendly. They provided us a cell phone and encouraged us to call and check on her. You could also stop by and see on the monitors. We HIGHLY encourage using it to make everyone happy. It costs $8/hr at night, $6/hr during the day. We plan to utilize it on the Indy.

 

Yes, cruising without a small child is nice (we went on the Enchantment while our daughter was being watched by my parents), but my wife was definitely stressed reducing the fun that we had. It was hard not having a reliable form of communication to do check ins or get pictures. Once she is older I am sure it will be easier.

[John&LaLa]

I vote to leave him home with family and enjoy some us time