Tipping at the beginning of your cruise?

[Toofarfromthesea]

We don't "prepay" gratuities on any of the cruise lines we travel on. We will arrive at the port having paid nothing toward gratuities. Then, when we check in, we will put the standard amount for gratuities on account. We still haven't paid anything. Then toward the end of the cruise, after we have had a chance to decide whether it is an appropriate amount, that amount will be charged to our credit card (so, we still will not have paid, or "prepaid," but at that point it's a pedantic difference).

 

Beyond that, passengers don't all agree with each other about everything. (Gosh, that's an understatement!) There are other passengers who don't like the whole gratuities system, and would prefer that the cost of service be fully built into the fare. They treat the amount of the standard gratuities as if it is built into the fare. The will prepay it, if possible, as a reflection of their personal and individual feeling that that specific cost should be treated that specific way.

 

These are the two polar extremes aboard the cruises we take. Neither of these extremes resemble giving a cash tip to their room steward or MDR servers at the beginning of the cruise.

 

I will say that the practice of giving a cash tip to bartenders at the beginning of the cruise should be regarded as separate from giving a cash tip to their room steward at the beginning of the cruise. Lumping them together means you will rightfully get responses that pertain any of the three, rather than individual responses pertaining to each of the three. While I won't speak for others, I will say that my earlier reply, "Silly practice," did not refer to doing so with regard to bartenders.

 

If tipping in advance is bribery, why is it OK, in your mind, to bribe bartenders?

[Toofarfromthesea]

We think the idea of pre-tipping for better service is flawed in many ways. A tip or gratuity is generally something you give for services rendered. One could argue that a crew member will work harder to please if they think it will get them a reward (i.e. tip). It can also be argued that giving money in advance is an insult (i.e. "You need to give me money so I will do my job?"). On one particular line, Holland America, they tend to use many Indonesians for cabin stewards and folks from Indonesia might look at a pre-tip as an insult.

 

But we have discovered one place where a pre-tip can bring some great benefit. With bartenders and bar waiters :). Treat a bartender well, and they will often repay you many times over when they pour drinks :).

 

Hank

 

So, bribery is OK so long as you benefit from it?

[Toofarfromthesea]

I've heard of some people giving a cash tip to their room steward or servers/bartenders at the beginning of the cruise to hopefully ensure speedy or great service throughout the length of the cruise.

 

Is this practice you have found helpful?

How much would you tip up front for a 7 day cruise?

 

Just do what you want. As you can see, the 'it's bribery' position is essentially incoherent, since it apparently is OK to bribe some staff but not other staff (but it DOES give folks a great chance to exercise their self righteous gene). I've also yet to meet anyone who actually gets offended by someone giving them money (cue the stories about the mythical crew member who told them this).

 

It is unlikely to get you better service, IMO, but you never really know. The 'I've never done it and always got excellent service' position may well be true, but of course it is hard to judge the efficacy of something you've never done, so there is THAT little logic hole.

 

Pay your automatic gratuities, and beyond that rely on your own judgement.

[cb at sea]

On cruises, tipping is done on the last night.

[Hlitner]

So, bribery is OK so long as you benefit from it?

 

Absolutely :) But for the record, I never used the word "bribe."

 

Hank

[CaptnG]

Gosh, these tipping threads always seem so intense..

I usually leave the room Steward about $5 per day (usually sail with our kids and get two connected rooms). Not sure that it gets me anything special, but it feels right to us. Guess I could just leave a big tip at the end instead, but I like the way we do it so why change.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

[Warburtons]

These gratuity threads are getting me down.

 

I work in the hospitality industry and if I were to receive a tip I would be mortified. Tipping is demoralising and patronising and I wont be doing it.

 

Even giving to students working their way through college means that you doubt their parents' ability to support them. Its a thing of the past. Stop it!

[Nic6318]

Not at the very beginning but early in a cruise I might tip a bartender, server or steward $10 to encourage more attentiveness for the remainder of the voyage and continue the tip each day if I'm receiving priority service. Technically, it's not a bribe but a "facilitation payment."

 

How well it works varies but when it does and the bar is crowded before dinner it's always nice to go to the head of line.

 

Hi

 

I have others who have suggested that they do this as well, to get better service. I personally haven't ever had service than was less than I would expect. It's not like you are going to be standing there for more than a few minutes. I certainly don't seek out the same bartender with the thought that he/she might remember that I gave a nice additional tip.

 

What I was wondering, was what do you do if the individual you gave this money to doesn't live up to your expectations? You can't ask for the money back. Do you find another bartender to give your money to.

[Flatbush Flyer]

What is being left out of the discussion is that some folks who find themselves thinking they need to bribe service personnel also believe (erroneously or not) that they don't possess the interpersonal communications skills helpful in winning crew members over within the first few sentences of introduction at first meeting.

[CaptnG]

What is being left out of the discussion is that some folks who find themselves thinking they need to bribe service personnel also believe (erroneously or not) that they don't possess the interpersonal communications skills helpful in winning crew members over within the first few sentences of introduction at first meeting.

 

 

 

I think you meant civility is what’s being left out from this discussion. Why equate leaving a tip with a lack of interpersonal communication skills? Or as some are saying a bribe?

We also left the music playing for our steward because he mentioned he liked a song we were playing one night and found out it’s not allowed for them to listen to personal music while working. Do you assume my motivation was to keep him cleaning our room longer? Sometimes people like to give more than the minimum. I personally feel like the crew are under paid for the amount of work they do and so I try to give a little extra. I also feel teachers are unpaid, giving them money could be considered a bribe, or insulting.. so I help out with extra supplies and support. It’s got nothing to do with wanting something extra, or an excuse to be antisocial, it’s simply expressing gratitude for a job well done. Now can we please stop attacking one another.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

[bUU]

If tipping in advance is bribery, why is it OK, in your mind, to bribe bartenders?

Why do you think it isn't?

 

Now can we please stop attacking one another.

One could hope. It seems sometimes that some people are underling to allow for others disagreeing with them and still having a say, using insult and other childishness to try to browbeat away perspectives that they don't like. It's not right. As long as it isn't illegal, the fact that it is something you don't like doesn't mean it is something wrong.

 

This message may have been drafted using voice recognition. Please forgive any typos.

[K32682]

What I was wondering, was what do you do if the individual you gave this money to doesn't live up to your expectations? You can't ask for the money back. Do you find another bartender to give your money to.

I would probably not tip them further on subsequent days.

 

What is being left out of the discussion is that some folks who find themselves thinking they need to bribe service personnel also believe (erroneously or not) that they don't possess the interpersonal communications skills helpful in winning crew members over within the first few sentences of introduction at first meeting.

The winning combination is both charm and cash. Compliment the bartender on their skills, introduce yourself, show your appreciation with a decent tip and mention that you will be back the next day at around the same time. If all goes according to plan over the next couple of days when you return the bartender will remember your name, know your drink, start making it right away, greet you with a smile and provide priority service.

[Flatbush Flyer]

I would probably not tip them further on subsequent days.

 

 

The winning combination is both charm and cash. Compliment the bartender on their skills, introduce yourself, show your appreciation with a decent tip and mention that you will be back the next day at around the same time. If all goes according to plan over the next couple of days when you return the bartender will remember your name, know your drink, start making it right away, greet you with a smile and provide priority service.

 

 

 

Sort of making my point.

There's a mix of art and skill of interpersonal communication required in many professions where initial impression sets the tone for future interactions. Some folks often struggle in this arena and may find themselves resorting to immediate bribery instead.

[FredT]

About 5 years ago we took a RCCL cruise with family. Our nieces husband introduced himself to our waiter in the MDR, and slipped him $50 while telling him that if service was "exemplary" more would follow at the end of the 7 days.

 

Say what you will, but our service was the best we have ever seen, (food, wine, and bar service) to the point that people at the surrounding tables commented on it.....

[Flatbush Flyer]

Also making my point. With the right initial connection (e.g., a couple of questions that quickly ID some common life experience), there's no need for the $50 upfront.

[pris993]

50+ cruises on 9 different lines, never tipped in advance. We do tip on the spot when we ask for something special in the buffet or a bar, i.e., we often like to have ice water when dancing... tip the server for the water... this usually results in them bringing us water any time they see us in the bar... we continue to tip. If we don't find something out on the buffet we would like, we ask if possible to get, if they do we tip them on the spot since this is above and beyond.

[K32682]

Sort of making my point.

There's a mix of art and skill of interpersonal communication required in many professions where initial impression sets the tone for future interactions. Some folks often struggle in this arena and may find themselves resorting to immediate bribery instead.

If you want better service, cold hard cash is going to beat a winning personality every time. The combination of charm and cash is better than either on its own.

 

About 5 years ago we took a RCCL cruise with family. Our nieces husband introduced himself to our waiter in the MDR, and slipped him $50 while telling him that if service was "exemplary" more would follow at the end of the 7 days.

 

Say what you will, but our service was the best we have ever seen, (food, wine, and bar service) to the point that people at the surrounding tables commented on it.....

Did they comment negatively? I recall on a Princess cruise some fairly unhappy folks when I received my pre-dinner cocktail before they did.

[FredT]

Not really "negative"... but more sort of passive aggressive "Boy they must LOVE you!" and "Maybe we should move to YOUR table!"

 

Like it or not, it works.

 

FredT

 

PS: As for me, I am simply too cheap a bastard to go that route. Dont get me wrong, once we find a good bartender or waiter on a cruise, we treat him like gold, and tip well (and privately) at the end of the cruise, but with my luck I would do the "pre tip" and get nothing return (Which would bug the daylights out of me the rest of the trip)

[sloopsailor]

Did they comment negatively? I recall on a Princess cruise some fairly unhappy folks when I received my pre-dinner cocktail before they did.

 

I chuckle at these "I slip them $$$ and they jump to serve me the rest of the cruise" posts. Bartenders, servers, etc. are not stupid. They deal with people every hour of every day they work. Accepting a bribe and then rushing to serve the briber ahead of other people who did not bribe them will not garner good feelings from those other customers. Annoyed customers don't make their lives any easier, no matter how much bribe money they are given by the entitled who think they deserve better service than everyone else.

 

I have never tipped in advance, nor have I given extreme tips, to be served faster and before others. And within a couple of days, and after going to the same bar, almost every time I get prompt service, and usually after being asked if I wanted my favorite drink again.

 

Besides, I am not in such a desperate need for a drink that I can't wait a few minutes for a server or bartender to wait on the people ahead of me. I don't need that drink in my hand as soon as I sit down. I can actually survive for a reasonable amount of time without alcohol in my system. :D

[donaldsc]

About 5 years ago we took a RCCL cruise with family. Our nieces husband introduced himself to our waiter in the MDR, and slipped him $50 while telling him that if service was "exemplary" more would follow at the end of the 7 days.

 

Say what you will, but our service was the best we have ever seen, (food, wine, and bar service) to the point that people at the surrounding tables commented on it.....

 

You can be sure that if the crew took care of your nieces [sic] husband before me because he had bribed the waitstaff, this would have a very negative impact on the size or the tip or the possibility of an end-of-the cruise tip from me.

 

DON

[Toofarfromthesea]

These gratuity threads are getting me down.

 

I work in the hospitality industry and if I were to receive a tip I would be mortified. Tipping is demoralising and patronising and I wont be doing it.

 

Even giving to students working their way through college means that you doubt their parents' ability to support them. Its a thing of the past. Stop it!

 

Good one, LOL.

[Toofarfromthesea]

Cash without a kind word: crass

 

Kind word without cash: cheap

 

Labeling perfectly legal behavior as bribery: moral preening

[sail7seas]

I always tip at end of cruise, never at start. it feels to me like bribing and the message is , If I don' tip, you wo'n't provide good service. I don't much like that. JMO

 

 

I don't recall a nyone suggesgting up front tipping is not legal.

Edited May 10, 2018 by sail7seas

[sail7seas]

I chuckle at these "I slip them $$$ and they jump to serve me the rest of the cruise" posts. Bartenders, servers, etc. are not stupid. They deal with people every hour of every day they work. Accepting a bribe and then rushing to serve the briber ahead of other people who did not bribe them will not garner good feelings from those other customers. Annoyed customers don't make their lives any easier, no matter how much bribe money they are given by the entitled who think they deserve better service than everyone else.

 

I have never tipped in advance, nor have I given extreme tips, to be served faster and before others. And within a couple of days, and after going to the same bar, almost every time I get prompt service, and usually after being asked if I wanted my favorite drink again.

 

Besides, I am not in such a desperate need for a drink that I can't wait a few minutes for a server or bartender to wait on the people ahead of me. I don't need that drink in my hand as soon as I sit down. I can actually survive for a reasonable amount of time without alcohol in my system. :D

 

 

 

 

Good post. :)

 

 

Practical and realistic.

[K32682]

Cash without a kind word: crass

 

Kind word without cash: cheap

 

Labeling perfectly legal behavior as bribery: moral preening

Tipping in advance is no different than paying for advance boarding or any other priority service. Completely legal and surprisingly effective.